???: Players! Greetings! I am the federal fraud investigator - Fenix!
Excuse me Comrade Fenix. You are a federal fraud investigator? Which government do you work for? This fight so far has been a rather... multinational effort.
Anyways, I am glad to hear that the actions aren't a guaranteed loss. I look forwards to hearing your reports on their location when you finally locate them. That huge pile of Lacre or whatever Random Guy stockpiled is a rather important resource!
The pun police will have your head for that!
Kuh! Are they targeting me? Oh no HEY HEY AAAUGH noooo don't bite there! ...It hurts. That's a mess. After I manage to shoo the Hurtsharks away from poor I-19 we assess the damage. The Lewdmarine is covered in a lot of nasty-looking teeth marks and her school swimsuit is very badly torn up in a way that probably only preserves her torso modesty because the universe itself is scared of the moderators, but it looks like we can continue the fight for now. I look back at the sharks and notice they are behaving oddly...
Only have me do this action 1 if Hungry Visitor's prions didn't convert all the Hurtsharks:
Some of them have turned to our side. Not all of them though, it's time to fix that issue! I bring out some harpoons and reel in a hurtshark or two. You idiots are under the delusion you'll ear everyone and nobody will eat you in return! Time to fix that! I then feed the caught sharks to Eevee shadow bacon , it seems he's rather hungry right now.
(OOC: Sorry if this isn't allowed by game mechanics. If not, just have me murder the hurtsharks conventionally.)
Only have me do this action 1 if the prions actually did get all the Hurtsharks converted:
They've come to our side! Soulraze is in for a bad time. Well you know what's more threatening their sharks? SHARKS WITH LASER BEAMS! Being the good chap I duct-tape a laser cannon to the head of a Hurtshark to make them do quadruple the hurt to the soulraze!
BOOM CRASH BOOM. The sound of the Submarine crashing rising and crashing against depth charges catches our attention again. We whirl around just as the KRAKEN finishes returning to its slumber. What was that? The sound of progress. I am rather glad the Lewdmarine didn't notice the KRAKEN's tentacles. Now we'll make MORE progress!
Action 2: I suspect rush up to one of the gaps in the Soulraze submarine's hull and jam an EMP device through the hole! While normally a sub's metal exterior would serve as a faraday cage to protect from EMP attack, it doesn't work on EMPs that originate from inside the cage/hull itself! The device initiates, causing navigation and targeting computers to instantly release Magic Smoke and stop working.
The Lewdmarine naturally follows that up with another torpedo barrage.
Action 3:
I throw napalm bombs all over the EVIL space station! The station itself is overall fireproof, but the napalm splattering everywhere still kills EVIL engineers that cannot stand the heat, and worse/better yet they set the engineer's blueprints on fire, setting back their construction process!
"A reminder that we should not be so quick to sacrifice our entities on the altar of convenience. The Godmodder has stated his plans to destroy his enemies this turn, and he would logically attack weakened entities with high attack, which describes all of our entities with high attack."
I apologize for the confusion, but which event are you referring to that teaches us this lesson. The recent turns have been rather chaotic, it's hard to keep up with everything.
OOC: Sorry for being a newb, but how come you are able to heal your entities without expending actions? Are you just having them self-heal this turn instead of attacking?0 actions: I gesture with my left hand, and a wave of green energy flows into the Eeveelutionary Eevee, healing its wounds and restoring its stamina.