The Heir looks around the battlefield, and just sees everyone attacking everything, and begins to have an idea. He teleports over to his computer, and begins to key in some commands. Once he is done, and presses enter, a very large funnel appears on the battlefield. It appears to be made to absorb excess energy from any attacks, IE any damage above the being attacked's hp value, and distills it into energy that can be used for basically any purpose. Or at least, that appears to be its final function, but currently, it is just a big funnel. Needs a distiller at the tail end, and an aparatus to draw excess energy to it at the mouth, as well as a container to put the energy into.
-
The Gifting system has received a major upgrade. Gifts are now Awards!
Defeat The Godmodder
- Thread starter Moniker
- Start date
The Ego
more lines, more angles
(Text ripped/inspired by a portion of a game that's not likely canon to this continuity, but hell if I'm passing up a chance to reference that which introduced me to this franchise)
The Ego, awakened from his Tribulation-long nap, decides that it's time for him to live up to his name. He begins doing so by narrating in the third person. But narrating what, you may ask? Not something so banal as, say, his morning routine or anyth- oh, nope, there he goes talking about how he woke up, rolled out of bed, slapped his neighbor for not giving him his lawnmower back yet, etc. Gosh, what a boring slog.
Fortunately, his rambles are drowned out by the sounds of warfare and violence and explosions going on in the foreground.
Unfortunately, The Ego soon comes to realize this. He is, as his name implies, very conceited and therefore unhappy with not being the center of attention at all times. In fact, now that he has a moment or two to think about it, he hasn't really been all that relevant at all throughout this game. Like, seriously. What has he done so far? Won a cake? Broken a game with mass-charging? He had some kinda something in that Deleter sidequest I think, right? There was the crystal, and the jailbreak things, but mostly jack squat.
And that's terrible, he thinks to himself.
Gosh golly, but I need me some of that sweet sweet relevance, like that Piono man has with his swords, or that Smiley guy does with his longposts, or that Carlos dude did with the ultimate hope attack that got retconned, or-[Several pages drowned out by the sounds of a massive hecking tank doing a big hecking tank thing]
...
Or that tank.
Man, I want a tank now.
I'ma have me a tank.
Suddenly, a massive tank piloted by The Ego proceeds to smash though the outer limits of the battlefield, here represented by a wall which collapses inward. We do use some artistic licence when we do say Tank: As far as tanks go, it's absolutely massive, with battleship guns and a massive armament of secondary weapons. Introducing, the TOG Mark XXXXIII. Being a TOG, it is still extremely slow, but absurdly long. At full length, it is easily 12 miles long, from front to back. hundred+ CP granted to me (as well as my own), meanwhile, seems to have been used in the manner decided upon by previous arangements. Slowly, but surely, and by slowly, we mean over the span of 9 years, the TOG manages to make the epic journey to the AG side of the battlefield. Everything ages normally, too. Somehow, this doesn't effect anything. Now within range, it begins to bring it's main battery of guns around to face the PGs, which, for dramatic reasons, will take about a full decade. In the mean time, it's secondaries open up, raining down HE fire across the battlefield.
And the Ego, the first and grandest of TOGs saw this.
And he thought that a giant death machine named after himself was cool.
And it was.
It really, really was.
The Ego, awakened from his Tribulation-long nap, decides that it's time for him to live up to his name. He begins doing so by narrating in the third person. But narrating what, you may ask? Not something so banal as, say, his morning routine or anyth- oh, nope, there he goes talking about how he woke up, rolled out of bed, slapped his neighbor for not giving him his lawnmower back yet, etc. Gosh, what a boring slog.
Fortunately, his rambles are drowned out by the sounds of warfare and violence and explosions going on in the foreground.
Unfortunately, The Ego soon comes to realize this. He is, as his name implies, very conceited and therefore unhappy with not being the center of attention at all times. In fact, now that he has a moment or two to think about it, he hasn't really been all that relevant at all throughout this game. Like, seriously. What has he done so far? Won a cake? Broken a game with mass-charging? He had some kinda something in that Deleter sidequest I think, right? There was the crystal, and the jailbreak things, but mostly jack squat.
And that's terrible, he thinks to himself.
Gosh golly, but I need me some of that sweet sweet relevance, like that Piono man has with his swords, or that Smiley guy does with his longposts, or that Carlos dude did with the ultimate hope attack that got retconned, or-[Several pages drowned out by the sounds of a massive hecking tank doing a big hecking tank thing]
...
Or that tank.
Man, I want a tank now.
I'ma have me a tank.
Suddenly, a massive tank piloted by The Ego proceeds to smash though the outer limits of the battlefield, here represented by a wall which collapses inward. We do use some artistic licence when we do say Tank: As far as tanks go, it's absolutely massive, with battleship guns and a massive armament of secondary weapons. Introducing, the TOG Mark XXXXIII. Being a TOG, it is still extremely slow, but absurdly long. At full length, it is easily 12 miles long, from front to back. hundred+ CP granted to me (as well as my own), meanwhile, seems to have been used in the manner decided upon by previous arangements. Slowly, but surely, and by slowly, we mean over the span of 9 years, the TOG manages to make the epic journey to the AG side of the battlefield. Everything ages normally, too. Somehow, this doesn't effect anything. Now within range, it begins to bring it's main battery of guns around to face the PGs, which, for dramatic reasons, will take about a full decade. In the mean time, it's secondaries open up, raining down HE fire across the battlefield.
And the Ego, the first and grandest of TOGs saw this.
And he thought that a giant death machine named after himself was cool.
And it was.
It really, really was.
Update CLXXIV (174)
ALL CP TO THE EGO! You feel power rush out of you, and flow into a great project...
Xerath: Let me wait for one more vote...
Xerath: FIRE!
TARGETED STRIKE! A fleet of bombers soars over your head, almost scraping the shimmering blue roof, and drops a massive volley of bombs in a contained explosion! Nemesis slain! -100% charge from the New Soulrazers!
Votes cast!
The Psychic overlord can't launch a suicide attack! You need to kill it manually!
Janus will do as you say, but can't control the abilities they unlock.
You zap the Psychic overlord with a huge damage burst, dealing 3,000,000 damage!
The 40K didn't get boosted like everything else. But, okay. It's now 4M. Constructor/Attack swapped.
You claim a Disco square! That delays this 4,500,000 damage attack to the end of the turn!
Disco Square claimed with your 2,000,000 damage attack!
The Taint will now not attack life forms that aren't [PG]! This means that they won't attack [PG] forces.
All the entities have been taken by the Stasis machine, so there isn't much around to revive.
You create a new Godmodder lock, and give it to Winkins. Do note that when something is locked behind a godmodder lock, its locked to a specific point in space. Considering the battlefield is constantly moving forward, that means it'll fall behind after being locked and won't be able to participate in the fight!
Your units are set to attack the Fortnite Player! 3,000,000 damage to the Fortnite Player! He runs around screaming, concerned about losing the Victory Royale to fire damage!
350,000 damage to each of the four PG-aligned entities! The black hole plane has always been a curiosity of scientists everywhere. They wonder what - or who - could have possibly been dense enough to create an entire plane of black holes.
The Godmodder had a blindfold on the entire time! He even had a blindfold on while reading the backwards text! His eyes were NEVER weak!
You don the Solar Powered Player Killer armaments, and fight with them at FULL POWER! No, more than full! You feel energy from Strider626 flowing into you, allowing you to fight at 200% POWER! RAHHHHHHHH!!!
...
In the end, panting, the Minecraft and Fortnite Players, having lost 10,000,000 HP each, stand before you, quivering in fear. You yourself collapse, not realizing how exhausted you are. You fought so hard the Player Killer Armaments ended up breaking into a hundred pieces. But you did it. They won't forget your name!
Your power flows into Alastair Dragovich! Thanks to your buff, he deals even more damage than he was already going to!
That's two votes for a true mult orb on the Temporal Guardian. One more will seal the deal.
The Nightmare dreams of its mother... tenderness... warmth...
It wakes up in a jolt, covered in sweat. The most horrific dreams its ever had...! Even as the memories pass from his mind, a lingering shadow of happiness remains on his mind... 11,000,000 damage!
The fortnite player vigorously denies it, mostly via screaming! 2,000,000 damage!
True Multiplier Orb used! The Temporal Guardian is now the Temporal Guardian II! Though the situation is a bit grim, his face brightens a little as he grows more powerful.
The Order Scout and Restorer, touched by your goodbye, come to a decision: For the moment, they will retreat. They'll come back later, and you can decide how to use them then. Unless you want them to stay and keep fighting...
For now, they're going to hang a short ways away from the group, back near Alice. If you want them to come up again, just say so.
The Fortnite and Minecraft Player dive for the apple, tearing each other up trying to get it! In the end, the apple is destroyed, and both are only worse off. 2,000,000 damage to each of them! Rage vial consumed!
The Godmodder is REALLY starting to hate it when people say that.
Turns out the person who gave that sidequest was hungry_visitor, returning from the AFK graveyard! You beat him and shake him down, but no rewards! Dang...
You take a Disco Square, using your 6,000,000 damage attack!
+9 CP to The Ego!
Machine will take effect at the end of the turn!
Cera's been made more steady.
Cera: You know what? That's just what I needed. Thanks.
The Godmodder just waits. Eventually, the anti-JOEbob agencies of Reality show up and clear the anomalous JOEbobs out for him. The JOEbob foundation disapproves of you exposing more of Reality to JOEbob.
You upgrade the Doormaker Plushie! You can't force it into your own inventory, but since you've laid claim to a potential use, it now requires votes to be used by not-you.
Altair: Right. It's inefficient to use CP when you don't have a Disco Square and at least three other kinds of multipliers.
Quinn: Well... actually, this Tank I've been hearing about sounds neat.
You head over to Alice. She's behind everyone else, continuing to add to her God Charge. If she gets too close, there's a real risk the Godmodder might blast her and steal away her very last hitpoint.
Alice: I'm listening.
Using some of your Ultimo Durana's power and your CP, you activate END! 15,000,000 damage pelts the Minecraft Player, ENDING them! No more Minecraft Player to worry about! The Godmodder's Army shrinks to 3 units...
Okay, that's a pretty sweet theme. I approve.
Ash Aragami now has a 750,000 damage attack!
The Minecraft Player was destroyed by The End, so you hit the Fortnite Players instead since they're really even worse! 4,500,000 damage, as the Fortnite Player is blown away by references to a game much better than them! +6 CP to The Ego!
+16 CP to The Ego! The Tank is shaping up to be better by the moment. There needed to be at least one massive superproject, after all...
All CP given to TOG! You feel something coming...
The Fortnite Player takes the attack instead! Fishing is probably a Fortnite mechanic. I wouldn't know, I've never played it. 4,500,000 damage to the Fortnite Player!
The Godmodder's forces see the fish in their path, and simply pick it up, and hurl it back behind them. Somehow, the fish ends up falling right through the ceiling of the cathedral/courthouse and through the Fortnite Player's trapdoor, eating him even more!
The Red Scare slips-and-slides on the vomit, faceplanting somehow! 3,000,000 damage!
+10 CP to The Ego!
Okay, so the +100,000A buff is being given to your army's total attack based on how many units that can attack there are... so... that adds up to +500,000A tot he total damage you have each turn. I did it because it was easier than making Fennie's attack some weird number, and ultimately works out the same if not better.
Mook Kill Switch used! It zaps the 2 remaining Army enemies, and deals 4,000,000 damage to each!
Temporal Guardian claims a Disco Square!
Nemesis is dead, so rice BEAM holds off to fire at something else this turn! Great Rice Barrier spawned! Fennie gets +5,000A to all 10 of their attacks!
Fornite sucks?
Fortnite sucks?
FORTNITE SUCKS!?
The Fortnite Player realizes its true! Immediately, three women emerge and take him away! The Fortnite Player immediately grows 6 inches taller, has a chiseled jawline, loses 20 pounds of fat, and gets a six-figure job! Fortnite Player DEALT WITH!
1,000,000 damage to Nightmare! Twice, thanks to the memes.
You've built the first part of a Distiller! When specifically mentioned in a post, it could potentially absorb extra energy from 1 attack launched per turn.
Alright, I'll take your stats from the PM here...
TOG Mark XXXXIII, or THE TANK deployed! Being made with a GRAND TOTAL of 214 CP, HERE ARE THE STATS:
[AG]THE TANK: 50,000,000/50,000,000 HP + 1 permashield, 38,500,000A (1 Retcon Shell remaining!)(Boss)
----------
DISCO SQUARES:
[claimed]Temporal Guardian: 14,000,000 on PG entity
[claimed]Krill13: 6,000,000 on Fortnite Player
[claimed]ES: 4,500,000 on Red Scare
JOEbob: 2,000,000 on living PG entity
The Temporal Guardian gains two 21,000,000 damage attacks, and cuts straight into the Nightmare and Red Scare! Nightmare and Red Scare slain! The Godmodder's Army units are completely dealt with! Everybody else's attacks dissipate!
----------
AG:
Quinn: You know what? You can have some of my CP! Let's go, Tank!
Quinn donates 23 CP to the Tank project, using his 3 actions for the turn!
Ash: I see you all haven't lost it. We've already run out of enemies of enemies and we're one turn in.
All the other NPC Players save Cera charge up 3 CP!
The New Soulrazer Army gains 50% charge!
Your entities stay wary and tick up!
THE TANK rolls onto the field, ready to crush anything and everything under its massive treads! Since so many people contributed to it, you can all command it together (with TOG getting the final say of course)! The nonexistent PG entities quiver!
The Psychic overlord attempts to commit suicide. This doesn't go well, as it has no suicide-committing abilities to speak of. In fact, its health regen actively works against this. If you want it to die, you'll have to kill it yourself.
Cera: Now! DIE!
Cera pulls out Yoreblade, and strikes straight at the Sealed Tank, teleporting across the short distance between them in an instant!
Infinity Damage! SEALED TANK SLAIN!
The Godmodder stares, incredulous. That thing actually WORKS? Crap.
PG:
The Godmodder has already gone through various phases of "not knowing what to say anymore", and now he's looped back around to regular anger. AGAIN you have trounced his forces! If you want a job done right... you have to do it yourself!
Godmodder action 1! The Godmodder activates RANDO MISSILE! A missile appears, and targets a totally random AG entity! It deals an unavoidable 50 million damage! Let's see, you have 48 targetable AG entities right about now... the missile hits number... 46! Bad luck, God-Elite Blazes! They all die!
Godmodder action 2! The Godmodder summons A DISTRACTION! Better spend time and effort killing it!
Godmodder action 3! The Godmodder lifts his hand, takes off his glove... his skin-colored glove impossible to tell apart from his skin... and flings gobs of green goo at multiple AG entities! 14 AG entities have been Gooped! Clean them or they'll take damage very quickly!
Godmodder actions 4 and 5! The Godmodder summons 2 New Soulrazer killer ships! If the ships are allowed to live for 2 full turns, they'll fly straight at the New Soulrazer army, and their attacks will reduce its charge by 50% each!
N:
CaptainNZZZ's entities do stuff, like get more Servitors.
----------
+10% distance to The Godmodder!
The Godmodder pulls out an old-fashioned-type walkie-talkie, and holds it up to his mouth.
The Godmodder: Yeah, the Players are cheating. Uh huh. Get me the Second Wave.
Five more [PG] entities have appeared! Godmodder progression slowed to +9% per turn!
---------
Suddenly, a shadow appears nearby... Something's falling... falling... well, nobody knows how, but despite the ceiling above being solid its somehow falling from the sky! It's...
THE MACHINE.
Summoned from Pionoplayer's 100 CP, it can be used by any Player who so desires it each turn! When used:
-It requires a focused action
-It will give you a superbuff that lasts for 3 turns
-You will be allowed to select two parameters: The first is Focus, and can be offense, defense, or utility. The second is specialty, and can be literally any one word. You will then be given an offensive, defensive, or "other" power based around the word you selected as your specialty.
-The Machine can only be used once by each Player, but has no limit on how many Players can use it.
-Example: "Offense" for focus and "Fire" for special would give you superpowered fire attacks that burn enemies. That's a boring example, so you should think of one more creative.
Activate your super mode to turn the tables on the Godmodder!
---------
The Order Orion arrives! A full contingent of Order Orion units, captains and grunts alike, here to help fight the Godmodder!
Order Orion leader: Thank you, paradoxdragonpaci! Thanks to the scout, we were able to get here in time!
Order Orion leader: Now, we see the New Soulrazer army is here, too! We can provide support to their troops, or directly enter alongside yours!
Do you want the Order Orion to enter the fight directly as entities, or bolster the New Soulrazer forces so they charge at 60% per turn?
----------
The Tower representing the Sealed Tank crumples to the ground. Everyone stares at it. You already know what comes next. You've certainly done this your fair share of times. This time, however, it happens much faster than usual.
The bricks of the tower reform themselves! Becoming stronger! Growing outwards! Now, instead of a Tower - the Tank is represented by an entire castle wall!
Meet the UNSEALED TANK! Now with 10 quadrillion HP!
Cera prepares to strike again, but then- a hole opens underneath him, and he's sucked in within nanoseconds!
Cera: What?!
Jamie: Cera!
Cera plummets down, down, down, away from the blue tunnel to the end of the Fourth Tribulation, and into a mysterious land... there's a sun above, and a sky, and clouds, but they're all the wrong color, and there's a ground, but its at an eternal 45 degree angle - moving upwards is difficult and tumbling down is easy! Around him, Cera sees all sorts of things - locked gates, that guy your crush likes, gaping holes, mental illness, a "road under construction" sign, a lack of 5 years of experience when applying for an entry-level job...
The Godmodder: Welcome, Cera, to the Plane of Obstacles.
The Godmodder: I put everyone I don't like here.
His voice booms throughout the entire Plane. Cera, still clutching Yoreblade, struggles to his feet, having already fallen a vast distance down this seemingly endless hill.
Cera: You killed my friends! You took everything from me! Some hill is NOTHING!
Cera: I'll make it out, Godmodder! We've come too far! I'll kill the Unsealed Tank, and NOTHING YOU CAN DO WILL STOP ME!
Cera takes stock of the obstacles in the way to the small portal that leads back to the HEXAGONAFIELD. There's a lot. You'll have to use your Player Powers and help clear them out!
Regardless of the hill's angle, Cera's going to blast forward absolutely as far as he can! If you can reduce the number of obstacles to 0, Cera will make it out! There are obstacle generators that generate new obstacles each turn - AFTER Cera moves.
Clear out all the obstacles with creativity and ingenuity! The sooner Cera makes it out, the sooner the Unsealed Tank will die!
----------
Altair: ...Alice...
Alice: We need to have WORDS when this is done, Altair.
Altair: ...Yes.
THE HEXAGONAFIELD:
ITINERARY:
-Defeat The Sealed Tank! You can't hurt the Godmodder until he's dead!
-Get Cera out of the Plane of Obstacles! Clear the way!
-Wreck the Godmodder's Army to prevent him from completing the Tribulation!
Minor Tasks:
Use Xerath's New Soulrazer support to help!
Select a purpose for the Order Orion!
Clean the gooped entities before they die!
Take down the New Soulrazer killers before they hurt the New Soulrazers!
Select a purpose for the Order Orion!
Clean the gooped entities before they die!
Take down the New Soulrazer killers before they hurt the New Soulrazers!
====================================================================================================
DISTANCE: 10%
+9% per turn!
[SR]New Soulrazer Army: 50% charge
[AG]Altair - CP: 46
[AG]Quinn - CP: 23
[AG]Cloak - CP: 3
[AG]Jamie - CP: 3
[AG]Ash - CP: 3
[AG]Xerath - CP: 3
PLANE OF OBSTACLES:
Exit Portal (leads back to HEXAGONAFIELD!)
[PG]Obstacle Generator: 10,000,000 HP (+1 Obstacle/turn)
[PG]Obstacle Generator: 10,000,000 HP (+1 Obstacle/turn)
[N]Girl Scout demanding you buy cookies
[N]Panhandlers aggressively asking for money
[N]"Out for lunch" sign at Receptionist's desk
[N]Man occupying position you want to be promoted to
[N]A lack of sleep constantly clouding your mind
[N]A solid brick wall
[N]Invisible wall in a videogame
[AG]Cera (wielding Yoreblade - kills everything in one hit!)(moves as far as he can up the hill each turn!)
[PG]Obstacle Generator: 10,000,000 HP (+1 Obstacle/turn)
[PG]Obstacle Generator: 10,000,000 HP (+1 Obstacle/turn)
[N]Girl Scout demanding you buy cookies
[N]Panhandlers aggressively asking for money
[N]"Out for lunch" sign at Receptionist's desk
[N]Man occupying position you want to be promoted to
[N]A lack of sleep constantly clouding your mind
[N]A solid brick wall
[N]Invisible wall in a videogame
[AG]Cera (wielding Yoreblade - kills everything in one hit!)(moves as far as he can up the hill each turn!)
[AG]THE MACHINE (Use to gain a super mode for 3 turns!)(Select offense, defense, or utility as a focus; then any word as your specialty!)
[AG - Winkins]Winkin's forces: TA: 3,600,000 (protected by 1 Play-doh) 3,500,000 HP Greatshield
Disco-Chan: 1,500,000 HP, 200,000 x 2A, Special: Disco Squares: 1/3 (repels darkness!)
[N]Fennie: 3,000,000/3,000,000 HP, 155,000 x 10A(-1,000,000 damage from all attacks, +500,000 HP/turn)(super extra damage against snakes)(Miniboss)(protecting Disco-Chan)(protected from 4 attacks)
Bunny Baron: 2,000,000 HP (20% dodge rate)
Bun prince/princess: 1,000,000 x 2 HP, 50,000 x 2A (20% dodge rate)(protected from 1 attack)(protected first by the shield buns then the knights)
Bun knights: 50,000 x 60 HP, 20,000 x 60A (15% dodge rate)(+5/turn)
Shield buns: 60,000 x 120 HP (20% dodge rate)(+10/turn)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Fortified Rice Temple(Gives +200,000 HP/turn, -500,000 damage from all attacks, and +100,000A (collective) to Winkins-owned entities)(needs to be killed in one hit, dies to 10M+ damage hits)
Specials: Rice Festival(+100KHP/50KA) - 1/4, Rice BEAM(500,000 damage) - 5/5 - Great Rice Barrier(+2M HP shield to all Winkins') - 1/6
Damage Tank: 0 damage stored!
[AG - Daskter]You can count on Osttruppen, no really you can!: 1,000,000/1,000,000 HP, 250,000A(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Tassadar: 4,000,000/4,000,000 HP, 250,000 x 4A, Special: Laser Incision: 5/5 (30% dodge rate)(Totem of Life Unended - when entity dies, puts them into "unended" mode, where HP decays by 50% until healing surpasses it)(protected from 1 attack)
Forward Operating Base: 2,000,000 HP (Resources totally exhausted! Still good as a bunker)
Fortress: 2,000,000 HP (protected from 1 attack)(3 Mines - next attackers take 20,000 damage)
Healbot Mk.1: 600,000/600,000 HP, +500,000A (inside Fortress)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Pioneers: 10,000 x 100 HP, 2,500 x 100A (can heal)
Line Gun: 100,000 x 25 HP(guarding Pioneers/Panzers)
Panzers: 200,000 x 10 HP, 80,000 x 10A
[AG - Cephalos Jr.]Red Army Swordsman: 60% intact! Duel!A (-20% intactness per turn in a duel)(well-trained, wins duels fast)
Red Army Engineers+1: 100,000 x 20 HP (can build or double the attack of whichever combat entity they choose to assist)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Conscript Facility: 300,000 HP (+10 Red Army Soldiers/turn)
Red Army Soldiers: 10,000 x 100 HP, 5,000 x 100A (max: 100)
[AG]The Dark One, -----/----- HP, 500,000 x 5A, Special: Revelation: 2/4, RP: 1
[AG - Crusher]Janus: 3,500,000/3,500,000 HP, Unlock Ability x 2!A (protected from 2 attacks)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Argus: 4,000,000 HP, 250,000 x 3A (Guard Dog, counterattacks attackers)
[AG - Arsenical]Scoville Reaver: 1,000,000/1,000,000 HP, 600,000A (A S/B/D ignorant)(+100,000 HP/turn)(conversion resistance)(protected from 4 attack)
[AG - CompTIA]LIVE Space Station(has emergency thrusters - saves from one deadly attack!)(Enhanced Production capacity)(Point defense - 25% chance to null attacks)(protected from 5 attack)
Ship AI panel(current AI: CompTIA)
PROTECTION SUMMARY: Shield that blocks first 1,000,000 of damage!
WEAPONRY SUMMARY: 1,300,000 + Tractor beam to freeze one enemy (N/A)
Quadcopters: 10,000 x 110 HP, 5,000 x 110A (guarding LIVE Space Station)(Max: 100)(+10/turn)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Space engineers: 1,000 x 5,000 HP (Can boost any one piece of the Space Station to be twice as effective for a turn)
Prism Deployer: 200,000 HP (+10 Prism/turn)(protected from 3 attack)(originally JOEbob's)
Prism: 50,000 x 70 + 500,000 HP(guarding all)(originally JOEbob's)
Shield Battery: 300,000 HP (can shield up to 2 entities for +500,000 HP, shielding lost if Shield Battery dies)(originally JOEbob's)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
[AG - Eevee Shadow Bacon]King DDD: Perfect HP, Perfect! A (Is perfect)
[AG - DragonofHope]Ash Aragami: 5,000,000 HP + 700,000 HP, 750,000A (+20 Aragami/turn) + Shield Core: 300,000 HP (projects 700,000 HP shield)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Aragami: 30,000 x 40 HP, 10,000 x 40A
[AG - EternalStruggle]Apex Fleet: TA: 6,250,000
The Apex: 5,000,000/5,000,000 HP, 500,000 x 2A (-1,000,000 damage from all attacks)(Fleet Beacon - Each turn, increase a specific unit type of ES's choice by 25%, rounded up to the nearest round number)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Attack frigates: 10,000 x 250 HP, 3,000 x 250A (10% dodge rate)
Ordnance cruiser: 250,000 x 10 HP, 250,000 x 10A(can attack or heal)
Spectral Lord: 400,000 x 20 HP, 4/4 charge (currently charging)(50,000A when not charging)
Overseer: 500,000 x 10 HP (As long as at least 1 Overlord is alive, refills Attack/Constructor drones to 1,000/4,000 each turn, if they're below that)(protected from 2 attack)
Attack drone: 1 x 1,000 HP + 4,000,000 HP, 2,000 x 1,000A
Constructor drone: 4,000 x 1,000 HP + 4,000,000 HP (Doubles the number of units in a group once per turn!)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Engineering depot: 400,000 x 2HP (Materials exhausted - still useful as a shield!)
Airfield: 400,000 x 1HP (Materials exhausted - still useful as a shield!)
[AG]Elite Pigmen: 10,000 x 10 HP, 5,000 x 10A
Elite Wither Skeletons: 50,000 x 5 HP, 50,000 x 5A(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Elite Ghasts: 5,000 x 25 HP, 10,000 x 25A (A S/B/D ignorant)
God-Elite Wither Skeletons: 500,000 x 5 HP, 500,000 x 5A(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
[AG]Psychic Overlord II: 8,900,000/11,500,000 HP, 1,700,000A, Special: Gain Ability: 1/2 (When killed, stays alive for one turn, and gets x15 damage)(+400,000 HP/turn)(weak mind powers)(Boss)(protected from 1 attack)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
[N - CaptainNZZZ]Temporal Guardian II: 30,000,000/30,000,000 HP, 7,000,000 x 2A, Special: Za Warudo: 2/2 (-200,000 damage from all attacks)(25% dodge rate+1 Auto Dodge)(+2,000,000 HP per turn)(miniboss+status effect resistance)(poison resistant)(protected from 3 attacks)(has spatial warping necklace - saves from fatal blow)
Mark III Tactical Flashbang: 650,000/650,000 HP, 250,000 x 2A (extra damage against hordes)(stuns hit enemies up to minibosses for 1 turn!)(reduces hit enemy accuracy by 20%!)(50% dodge rate)(gravity harness)(2 attack redirector)(1 Emergency teleporter)(-100,000 damage from all attacks)(+5,000 HP/turn)(gooped, -3,000,000 HP/turn for 3 more turns)
Rotaz+1: 350,000/350,000 HP(engineer)(+5% accuracy)(50% dodge rate)(immune to teenage rebellion)(resistant to status effects)(protected from 1 attack)(2 attack redirector)(Dimensional and Space Emergency Button)(Telaport, saves from lethal hit)
Magitek servitor factory: 700,000/700,000 HP, +200,000A, +40 Servitor/turn (3 attack redirector)(+5% accuracy)(40% dodge rate)(immune to teenage rebellion)(resistant to status effects)(Time-phaser protects from one lethal hit)
Servitors: 10,000 x 580, 5,000 x 580A(+5% accuracy)(+15% dodge rate)(immune to teenage rebellion)(resistant to status effects)(2 attack redirector)
Hellfire Crystal Golem: 2,000,000/2,000,000 HP, 100,000A (protected from 1 attack... IN STYLE!)(+5% accuracy)(+15% dodge rate)(immune to teenage rebellion)(resistant to status effects)(Rune-cast powers)(Phase-shift cloak powers)(Dimension warping powers)(1 attack redirector)(Time-phaser protects from one lethal hit)
[AG]THE TANK: 50,000,000/50,000,000 HP + 1 permashield, 38,500,000A (1 Retcon Shell remaining!)(Boss)
[PG]Distraction: 10,000,000 HP, Distract!x3A (A S/B/D ignorant)
[PG]New Soulrazer Killer Ship: 7,500,000 HP (reduces New Soulrazer charge by 50% in 2!)
[PG]New Soulrazer Killer Ship: 7,500,000 HP (reduces New Soulrazer charge by 50% in 2!)
[PG]Fruit Ninja: 35,000,000 HP, 2,000,000 x 10A (30% dodge rate)(Elite)(A S/B/D ignorant)(Army)
[PG]Attack Shield Obliterator: 40,000,000 HP, 0 x 30A (Tri-shield buster)(Army)
[PG]Simplicity: 35,000,000 HP, 3,000,000 x 3A (Tri-shield buster)(Army)
[PG]E3 Heckler: 30,000,000 HP, Heckle x 2!A (heckle 50/50 either makes entities kill themselves or get debuffed)(A/S/B/D ignorant)(Army)
[PG]☺: 20,000,000 HP, 5,000,000 x 2A (Tri-shield buster)(Army)
[PG]Unsealed Tank: 10,000,000,000,000 HP (projecting Godmodder protection field)(Boss)
[PG]The Godmodder: 22/310 HP (Descended - x5 Actions per turn)(Completely Invincible)
OOC: After some deliberation, I have decided that last-chance saves will cost a full focused action from now on - not CP, just a focused action. You can still do focused action + 1 CP to use a fourth action. They're way too good to cost the same amount as an attack shield.
Player list:
Alastair Dragovich - CP: 23 (Pelicannon, Rage Cube, X-Blade (use to protect one Player from death once!))
Arsenical - CP: 8(1 post in debt!)
Bill Nye - CP: 14 (has super sharp gold sword - 3 power left, burny iron sword - 3 power left, bow and arrow - 3 power)
Captain.cat - CP: 55 (protected from 1 attack)(has 1 Boost Stone)
[N]CaptainNZZZ - CP: 3 (protected from 1 attack)(has Entity Loyalty Punch Card - redeems one disloyal entity, Overpowering Poison+1, Remnant crypt energy, EMP, Mopium, Godmodder Tracker V1.0, always-hit-Monocle)
Cephalos Jr. - CP: 2 (has Cybil's blood sample, anti-infantry railgun, pocket reactor(1 power), power armor)
Crusher48 - CP: 0 (Has Tactician Soul in a Bottle, Scanner Cannon)
Dangan_Machin - CP: 9
Daskter - CP: 9 (has Boosted Evolve Hunters)
Dragon of Hope?!? - CP: 0 (Espionage ghost)(Excalibur - 25 Power)
Eevee Shadow Bacon - CP: 15
Ender_Smirk - CP: 0 (has Shadow Agitator)
[N+1]EternalStruggle - CP: 0
FlamingFlapjacks - CP: 0 (has bag of nine-sided die)
General_Urist - CP: 11 (Shotgun of Dope - 2 power left, attack debuffs whoever it hits)
GoldHero101 - CP: 0 (has Ultimo Durana(94 power left, CALLBACK Greatsword, Self damage ticket)
I'mTotallyNot-R.O.B - CP: 0 (has Super Soldier Serum)
[N+2]Joebobobob - CP: 25 (has nice bed, infinite charmzard energy, 3 Boost Stones, cyan orb(1 power) 1 Cleansed (?) Multiplier Orb, Sub-par godmod lock, Something, Godmodder Lock)
Karpinsky - CP: 0
Krill13 - CP: 25
Moonstar101 - CP: 0
O.R.I.G.I.N. - CP: 0
Paradoxdragonpaci - CP: 6 (has paradox void cards, hexagonaherbs, 4 Homestuck Aspect vials(Life/Void/Mind/Blood/Doom/Heart/Rage/Space gone), BUFFNESS, Save Point: [AG]Psychic Overlord II: 9,000,000/9,000,000 HP, 3,500,000A, Special: Gain Ability: 2/2, Special: OMLDC: 5/5 (When killed, stays alive for one turn, and gets x15 damage)(+300,000 HP/turn)(Boss))
Pionoplayer - CP: 0
Ranger_Strider_ - CP: 8
That-Random-Guy - CP: 58 (protected from 1 attack)(has Echolocation)
The_Quiet_Watcher - CP: 19 (has paradise grenade(teleports enemies to paradise), spirit knife, grenades)(has The Real Kicker, entropy-blood-smash powers!)
The_Nonexistent_Tazz - CP: 18 (protected from 1 attack)
The_Two_Eternities - CP: 0 (protected from 1 attack)
[N]The Ego - CP: 0 (+10,000 HP sword, Delicious cake, one use of Somno powers, Player Eye, Player Knife, RGB control panel(has red, green, blue buttons), four-leaf clover)
Vylad - CP: 8 (wearing Impervium Armour, protects from damage!)(has Wound healer, Coin Flipper)
[N+2]Winkins - CP: 0 (has Mook Kill Switch, more of a BBB, +1,000A Iron sword, 10,000 damage token, 1 Multiplier Orb, greatsword, 1 Godmodder Lock)
Player Inventory:
Bonfire(3 uses left)(Spend your entire turn resting here to heal)
Ultimate Orb of Shielding(+1 attack shield to everything on field)
Orb of Resurrection (Revives one dead allied entity at full strength)
Time Accelerator (Causes an entity to experience 10 turns of time in 1 turn)
True Multiplier Orb
Godmodding Vol. 1
Double Rainbow Ticket x 1, Medkit x 2, Paradox Medkit, Melodic transmitter x 3, Redirifle, Safetyified Miniature Doormaker Plushy, Bravely Default Asterisks, Mirror Frame, Black Filling, Economy-Melting Bank Note
Charge Booster (damage: 7/20)
Wishful Whammy(random effects attack)(non-combinable)
Celestial Guidance(2 uses left)
Magical Obliteration(1 use left)
Desperation Shield(Leaves one Player at mortally wounded if they would otherwise die)
CP Converter
Player Power Cascader (rolls 10 1-10 numbers, multiplies results and then multiplies that by a Player's attack to increase damage!)
Duelist's Garment (gives powers of Yorehammer, Starcalibur, Resolute Heart, and Infinileaf Clover for one post)
Arsenical - CP: 8(1 post in debt!)
Bill Nye - CP: 14 (has super sharp gold sword - 3 power left, burny iron sword - 3 power left, bow and arrow - 3 power)
Captain.cat - CP: 55 (protected from 1 attack)(has 1 Boost Stone)
[N]CaptainNZZZ - CP: 3 (protected from 1 attack)(has Entity Loyalty Punch Card - redeems one disloyal entity, Overpowering Poison+1, Remnant crypt energy, EMP, Mopium, Godmodder Tracker V1.0, always-hit-Monocle)
Cephalos Jr. - CP: 2 (has Cybil's blood sample, anti-infantry railgun, pocket reactor(1 power), power armor)
Crusher48 - CP: 0 (Has Tactician Soul in a Bottle, Scanner Cannon)
Dangan_Machin - CP: 9
Daskter - CP: 9 (has Boosted Evolve Hunters)
Dragon of Hope?!? - CP: 0 (Espionage ghost)(Excalibur - 25 Power)
Eevee Shadow Bacon - CP: 15
Ender_Smirk - CP: 0 (has Shadow Agitator)
[N+1]EternalStruggle - CP: 0
FlamingFlapjacks - CP: 0 (has bag of nine-sided die)
General_Urist - CP: 11 (Shotgun of Dope - 2 power left, attack debuffs whoever it hits)
GoldHero101 - CP: 0 (has Ultimo Durana(94 power left, CALLBACK Greatsword, Self damage ticket)
I'mTotallyNot-R.O.B - CP: 0 (has Super Soldier Serum)
[N+2]Joebobobob - CP: 25 (has nice bed, infinite charmzard energy, 3 Boost Stones, cyan orb(1 power) 1 Cleansed (?) Multiplier Orb, Sub-par godmod lock, Something, Godmodder Lock)
Karpinsky - CP: 0
Krill13 - CP: 25
Moonstar101 - CP: 0
O.R.I.G.I.N. - CP: 0
Paradoxdragonpaci - CP: 6 (has paradox void cards, hexagonaherbs, 4 Homestuck Aspect vials(Life/Void/Mind/Blood/Doom/Heart/Rage/Space gone), BUFFNESS, Save Point: [AG]Psychic Overlord II: 9,000,000/9,000,000 HP, 3,500,000A, Special: Gain Ability: 2/2, Special: OMLDC: 5/5 (When killed, stays alive for one turn, and gets x15 damage)(+300,000 HP/turn)(Boss))
Pionoplayer - CP: 0
Ranger_Strider_ - CP: 8
That-Random-Guy - CP: 58 (protected from 1 attack)(has Echolocation)
The_Quiet_Watcher - CP: 19 (has paradise grenade(teleports enemies to paradise), spirit knife, grenades)(has The Real Kicker, entropy-blood-smash powers!)
The_Nonexistent_Tazz - CP: 18 (protected from 1 attack)
The_Two_Eternities - CP: 0 (protected from 1 attack)
[N]The Ego - CP: 0 (+10,000 HP sword, Delicious cake, one use of Somno powers, Player Eye, Player Knife, RGB control panel(has red, green, blue buttons), four-leaf clover)
Vylad - CP: 8 (wearing Impervium Armour, protects from damage!)(has Wound healer, Coin Flipper)
[N+2]Winkins - CP: 0 (has Mook Kill Switch, more of a BBB, +1,000A Iron sword, 10,000 damage token, 1 Multiplier Orb, greatsword, 1 Godmodder Lock)
Player Inventory:
Bonfire(3 uses left)(Spend your entire turn resting here to heal)
Ultimate Orb of Shielding(+1 attack shield to everything on field)
Orb of Resurrection (Revives one dead allied entity at full strength)
Time Accelerator (Causes an entity to experience 10 turns of time in 1 turn)
True Multiplier Orb
Godmodding Vol. 1
Double Rainbow Ticket x 1, Medkit x 2, Paradox Medkit, Melodic transmitter x 3, Redirifle, Safetyified Miniature Doormaker Plushy, Bravely Default Asterisks, Mirror Frame, Black Filling, Economy-Melting Bank Note
Charge Booster (damage: 7/20)
Wishful Whammy(random effects attack)(non-combinable)
Celestial Guidance(2 uses left)
Magical Obliteration(1 use left)
Desperation Shield(Leaves one Player at mortally wounded if they would otherwise die)
CP Converter
Player Power Cascader (rolls 10 1-10 numbers, multiplies results and then multiplies that by a Player's attack to increase damage!)
Duelist's Garment (gives powers of Yorehammer, Starcalibur, Resolute Heart, and Infinileaf Clover for one post)
OOC: Next update should come on Saturday. After that, I won't be able to update until the next Sunday - I'll be away at a conference to learn new skills!
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GoldHero101
Warrior of Light and Darkness
He/Him
Ultimo Durana: 94 Energy Stored
3 ACTION FOCUS - OBTAIN SUPER POWERS?: My Focus: Offense. My Specialty: Dragon. As the machine activates, dragon power swirls around me... "This is gonna be good. Drago, our time is now!"
Drago: Finally my turn EHHHH?!?!? I've waited long enough.
Drago pulls out his Dracolyte staff and assists in the Machine usage, to what effect, I do not know. (he a dragonborn from dnd, take that as you will)
3 ACTION FOCUS - OBTAIN SUPER POWERS?: My Focus: Offense. My Specialty: Dragon. As the machine activates, dragon power swirls around me... "This is gonna be good. Drago, our time is now!"
Drago: Finally my turn EHHHH?!?!? I've waited long enough.
Drago pulls out his Dracolyte staff and assists in the Machine usage, to what effect, I do not know. (he a dragonborn from dnd, take that as you will)
Free Action: Tactical analysis incoming. Recommended reading for all players.
Vote: True Multiplier Orb on THE TANK. It's already strong enough to one-shot the ancient Soulrazer, let's make it even stronger.
Orders: The Psychic Overlord is ordered to charge Simplicity (or if it's dead, target based on threat priority), attack its target, and then draw aggro and soak the attacks. Janus is ordered to give THE TANK some abilities, and also to tell me what it's doing because I heavily suspect it freeloaded and didn't do anything last round when all entities "ticked up". Argus joins our attacking forces and follows my listed targeting priority. The tank is advised to follow my targeting priority, with the exception of the Fruit Ninja due to its dodge chance compared to the the tank's single attack.
Cera Advice: Most of those obstacles have a human element. You have a blade that can one-shot humans. You can easily kill those obstacles to escape. Don't feel any guilt, the obstacles are nothing but Godmodder constructs.
Other NPC Player Advice: I'd consider using your CP to buff up the tank with regen, armor, or extra health. It's the lynchpin of our strategy, and since it's about to receive our last True Multiplier Orb, the benefit of any buffs you give it will be doubled.
Action 1: I upgrade THE TANK with homing penetrator rounds. Now, after overkilling a target, the shot will pass out the other side and home in on another random target.
Action 2: I use Naked Teleport on Janus, teleporting him and only him to a nearby safe location. His clothing, and more importantly the goop on him, aren't carried along.
Yeah, despite the name, it's actually really handy to be able to selectively teleport. It utterly pisses on any prison that can't fully nullify my abilities.
Action 3: I challenge the Godmodder to install every single Skyrim Mod into Minecraft. Yes, every single Skyrim mod, including Skyrim special edition mods, stand-alone mods that aren't designed to be compatible with anything, and even the mods from that one site that can't be named.
If he fails to do so, I call him a loser, because he clearly isn't a God-Modder if he can't install every single Skyrim mod into Minecraft. If he succeeds, I copy all the files from his completed project, check for viruses, infohazards, and any other shenanigans that would be detrimental, and distribute it to the troops for a morale boost.
Overall Threat Level (1 is zero threat, 10 is game over threat): 5. The Godmodder is pulling out all the stops, but we have a tank. And when it gets multiplied, it will have enough power to kill two of his entities per round (at least once it gains the capability to penetrate targets). Fair warning, even with its boss tag, the Godmodder will try to screw with it. Put any attack shields behind its permanent shield if you can.
Total Entity DPS: Excluding the Overlord, Temporal Guardian, and tank, we have 22,600,000 entity DPS. The Psychic Overlord adds 1,700,000 to that, The Temporal Guardian adds 14,000,000 to that, for a total entity DPS of 38,300,000. The tank has 38,500,000 DPS, which will be doubled to 77,000,000 DPS once True Multiplier Orb is used. That gives a total DPS of 115,300,000. There are currently 160,000,000 HP of army entities, 25,000,000 HP of secondary PG entities, and 20,000,000 HP worth of obstacle generators we can negate outright by rushing the obstacles. Assuming 30 actions worth of player attacks for an extra 30 million damage, we'll still end up with about 15 million HP of core Godmodder army entities surviving.
Current Schemes:
Total Entity DPS: Excluding the Overlord, Temporal Guardian, and tank, we have 22,600,000 entity DPS. The Psychic Overlord adds 1,700,000 to that, The Temporal Guardian adds 14,000,000 to that, for a total entity DPS of 38,300,000. The tank has 38,500,000 DPS, which will be doubled to 77,000,000 DPS once True Multiplier Orb is used. That gives a total DPS of 115,300,000. There are currently 160,000,000 HP of army entities, 25,000,000 HP of secondary PG entities, and 20,000,000 HP worth of obstacle generators we can negate outright by rushing the obstacles. Assuming 30 actions worth of player attacks for an extra 30 million damage, we'll still end up with about 15 million HP of core Godmodder army entities surviving.
Current Schemes:
- We need the Psychic Overlord to make a suicide attack, which requires it to suicide. The goop will take 3 million HP off of it, but I'd recommend having it take point and force the PG army to finish it off, wasting their attacks to further our ends. Once it does this, we Save Point it and then use the Save Point on THE TANK to make the Godmodder fight it twice.
- We're going to Resurrection Orb the tank the first time it dies, then save point it to resurrect it a second time.
- If we send the Order Orion to the NSA, that boosts the bonus from temporal acceleration on it to 600%. With the increased threat shown by the Godmodder, it may be worth saving up the NSA's resources for Godslaughter to keep the Godmodder in check, and with 600% charge, it would be able to use Godslaughter 3 times in a row. Although we should save at least 100% charge in case a really nasty entity comes along that needs to be wiped out.
- If your entity is gooped, clear it off yourself if you can. word of moniker is that it takes 2 actions to clean unless you have a reasonably creative single action.
- E3 Heckler: It can make entities kill themselves outright. Get it off the field, now.
- Smileyface Thing: It's got the lowest health and highest attack of the PGs on the field right now.
- Fruit Ninja: It has 20 million DPS over 10 attacks. Note: Due to its dodge chance, entities with only 1 attack like THE TANK should skip this unless they have accuracy bonuses. We don't want to waste THE TANK's whole attack on one target.
- Attack Shield Obliterator: If it lives, we lose all attack shields.
- Simplicity: It's more durable than smileyface, and has less damage but one additional attack. We can let it live and it won't ruin our day.
- Soulraze Killer Ships: These 2 will negate one of the New Soulrazer Army's one-shots. Granted, we have 2 turns to address them, and they aren't that tough.
- Obstacle Generators: Unless there's no obstacles left at the EOTB, in which case they're pointless.
- Distraction: It's a distraction. Ignore it.
- Unsealed Tank: I mean it's better than not firing at all, right?
Vote: True Multiplier Orb on THE TANK. It's already strong enough to one-shot the ancient Soulrazer, let's make it even stronger.
Orders: The Psychic Overlord is ordered to charge Simplicity (or if it's dead, target based on threat priority), attack its target, and then draw aggro and soak the attacks. Janus is ordered to give THE TANK some abilities, and also to tell me what it's doing because I heavily suspect it freeloaded and didn't do anything last round when all entities "ticked up". Argus joins our attacking forces and follows my listed targeting priority. The tank is advised to follow my targeting priority, with the exception of the Fruit Ninja due to its dodge chance compared to the the tank's single attack.
Cera Advice: Most of those obstacles have a human element. You have a blade that can one-shot humans. You can easily kill those obstacles to escape. Don't feel any guilt, the obstacles are nothing but Godmodder constructs.
Other NPC Player Advice: I'd consider using your CP to buff up the tank with regen, armor, or extra health. It's the lynchpin of our strategy, and since it's about to receive our last True Multiplier Orb, the benefit of any buffs you give it will be doubled.
Action 1: I upgrade THE TANK with homing penetrator rounds. Now, after overkilling a target, the shot will pass out the other side and home in on another random target.
Action 2: I use Naked Teleport on Janus, teleporting him and only him to a nearby safe location. His clothing, and more importantly the goop on him, aren't carried along.
Yeah, despite the name, it's actually really handy to be able to selectively teleport. It utterly pisses on any prison that can't fully nullify my abilities.
Action 3: I challenge the Godmodder to install every single Skyrim Mod into Minecraft. Yes, every single Skyrim mod, including Skyrim special edition mods, stand-alone mods that aren't designed to be compatible with anything, and even the mods from that one site that can't be named.
If he fails to do so, I call him a loser, because he clearly isn't a God-Modder if he can't install every single Skyrim mod into Minecraft. If he succeeds, I copy all the files from his completed project, check for viruses, infohazards, and any other shenanigans that would be detrimental, and distribute it to the troops for a morale boost.
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Ranger_Strider_
The one who does lots of Striding
FOCUS!
I'll take this time to gain greater strength at the machine.
My focus? Utility. My specialty? Time.
I'll take this time to gain greater strength at the machine.
My focus? Utility. My specialty? Time.
Action 1-3: I go to Simplicity and I proceed to Beat the crap out of everyone with my determination swords. I help out by summoning daggers and stabbing most of them. I create many frying pans and proceed to whack everyone.
Meanwhile in Shadrix's Ship...
Kirby, while looking at Bill Nye's progress, hears a familiar tune. It's the tune for the end credits sequence of DDLC. Kirby heads to the room to see Monika playing. She plays so elegantly. It's like she knows what she is doing. Kirby is surprised, "Monika?"
Monika stops and looks at Kirby with a smile, "You like it? Don't worry, I'm not really very good."
"Not very good? That was excellent! I loved it!" Kirby says with the biggest smile ever! Monika giggles, "Aww, thank you!"
"Do you remember where you learned that song?"
"I just came up with it myself, I think."
"Huh… Well I-"
Suddenly, alarms start blaring. Monika quickly gets up, "Okay everyone, music class is over, let's get out of here!"
Monika leaves and Kirby follows. Kirby heads back to his seat and Monika follows behind. She looks around the cockpit with awe. She then sees the players moving and doing their thing on the big screen. Kirby turns off the alarm surveys the situation. Kirby then points to the players, "See these guys? These are the players of this universe. They are here to help save the Multiverse!"
"That's quite a lot of people...wait, players? Is this all some sort of game?"
"Uhhhhhh…. Don't question it. Anyways…"
Kirby zooms in on one player, "This is Bill Nye!"
Monika gets a closer look, "Hi, Nye! Wait, can he hear me? I dunno, with how much he resembles Shadrix, he looks like a reused sprite to me."
"Unfortunately, no he can't. But his looks are no coincidence. Bill Nye is an android designed by W.D Gaster and Shadrix. He was built to be Shadrix's successor. He has 7 A.I's with him, each one a specific trait: 'Determination, Patience, Bravery, Integrity, Perseverance, Kindness, and lastly, Justice. Determination is the strongest of the bunch."
"That sounds so adorable! Kind of like one of the mangas that-"
"What?" Kirby says in a confused way, "Which one?"
"Our Lovely Llamas, I think it was called. Bunch of friends living in a network of tunnels under a mountain, and they had flower gems with different powers when they worked together. I never really got into manga, but she used to go on and on about it…
Wait a second, who was it? Nonono, I almost…!"
"Are you ok?" Kirby looks concerned.
"My head got so staticy, and loud, and painful..."
"... I have an idea. Come with me for a second."
Kirby gets up and heads down the hall. Monika follows clutching her head. Kirby heads to the dark hallway. Monika is unsure if this is safe, "This hurt enough as it is. I'm not sure if I want to remember. I might not know much, but what's left of me is still me. I don't wanna risk losing the rest of it. Imagine if you could delete your own existence with a click of a button...I wouldn't wish that on anyone."
Kirby turns around, "Don't worry, my idea won't hurt at all. Trust me!"
Kirby opens the door and inside is a room with a single chair with a giant helmet. The walls are filled with T.V's. Monika looks inside still clutching her head, "Somehow, this fine tribute to mad science doesn't scream 'trustworthy' or 'painless'."
"Don't worry, I do this with Shadrix every time he loses his memories. He never says it hurts. He built this dang thing. He made it so nothing will ever get hurt."
Monika slowly goes inside, "Okay, I'm buying this a little more, though it's concerning in itself that you guys lose your memories on a regular basis. Is this thing just inefficient, or what?"
"Nah it's just bad timing. Now, please take a seat!"
Monika slowly sits down. As soon as this happens, all T.V's turns on. The helmet slowly descends upon Monika's head. Inside the helmet has a tiny screen. The helmet turns on and static is seen. "Alright, All I need to do is input some stuff here and we should be good to go!"
Monika looks around in a frightening matter, "I can't see anything. There's static everywhere, everything, can't move, can't escape...SHADRIX WHERE ARE YOU?"
"Monika calm down! This is natural! Please… go with the flow! Trust me!"
Monika takes a deep breath, "Right. There's somebody here. I exist. I'm not alone. It'll be okay."
"Alright done! Now, In a few moments, we will see your recent memories and any other memories you may be hiding. And……… GO!"
The T.V's and the helmet display a room of sorts. It looks like the clubroom. There are 4 people who are staring at Monika. all of them are ghostlike and their faces are blank. Then, the next memory jumps to Monika deleting one of the names on the files. The names are completely blank. Then, The last hidden memory has her pressing a button that causes the whole area to go dark. The next memory shows her in the ship near the terminal where Kirby found her. Then, The T.V's turn off and the helmet ascends. Monika looks around to see Kirby in front of her, "I think they were my friends. Four of them. There was barely anything left. One little push, and everything, everywhere, gone, just like that. And then nothing, and then...I'm on this ship."
Kirby looks concerned, "... hmmm. It's still not all of the memories. Most of them are corrupted. It will take a while to restore them all. So for now, why don't we take a bre-"
Monika starts crying, "I deleted an entire universe! Everything I ever cared about! You should be down there fighting ME!"
"... I am sure there was a reason you pushed that button. It's hidden in the memories that are corrupted. Maybe someone forced you, or it was already decaying. We can't be sure."
Kirby hovers up and gives Monika a cute hug, "It'll be okay. Might take some time, but we'll figure this out, all right?!"
Monika then returned the hug, "You're giving me a chance, you think I'm worth knowing. I'll trust you on this, and I'm glad you're trying for me. If there's anything around here I might be able to help with, let me know, and I'll give it a shot, all right?"
"Got it! You can count on me!" Kirby smiles. "Now, let's head back to the piano room ok?"
"You've gotta show me how you play with those cute little nubs!"
In Omega Flowey's battleground...
Shadrix: Why does it feel like we have been out of the loop for a while?
Gaster: I HAVE NO IDEA.
Sans is simply taking a nap. He soon awakens when Omega Flowey screams at them. Shadrix realizes he has about enough and does his special attack. He activates the Chaos Emeralds inside his suit and goes Super. He fires many golden Beams and then flies right through Flowey. He deals 100,000 Damage! Sans and Gaster do a team attack and deals 100 damage. Omega Flowey attacks all 3 of them but the shield blocks most of it. The shields lose 30% integrity. He then uses the yellow soul to attack, creating many guns that fire at them. Shadrix calls for help once more and The Yellow soul regains control. All 6 souls rebel against Flowey and reduce his Defence to 0. Chara takes the souls before the others do and holds on to them.
Flowey was about to make his move but the Determination Beam that was fired a while back came crashing down onto Omega Flowey, obliterating him.
OMEGA FLOWEY DESTROYED
Chara teleports in slowly clapping. Well done... Very well done. You managed to take out Omega Flowey. However, I have one more trick up my sleeve!
Chara summons a bunch of glitches in his hand. He takes the souls and puts it in there. He takes a hard mode red soul and puts it in there as well. He then throws them into the air. The glitches and souls form together and explodes
When the dust settles. They see a figure floating in the air. They summon rainbow fire and throws it at Shadrix and the others. They all dodge out of the way.
I want you to welcome... HARD MODE ASRIEL DREEMURR!!
Asriel Dreemurr floats down to the ground with a smile on his face. Chara goes next to him and summons two red knives. Asriel summons a blaster and a sword.
Shadrix goes into offense mode which takes away all shields. Sans and Gaster both prepare their blasters.
AC
Shadrix HP: 99999999999999 ATK: ??? DEF: ??? (Suit set into ATK mode) (Filled with DETERMINATION)
sans HP: 1 DEF: 1 (Powered by Shadrix's DETERMINATION) (Has a 100% dodge rate) (dodge rate can lower if tired)
Gh@st3r HP: 666666 ATK: 6666 DEF: 66666 (Can't be harmed by normal means) (Can glitch out the enemy)
PC
Chara HP: 99 ATK: 99 DEF: 99 (Filled with Determination) (Has 6 Butterscotch Pies) (can be revived upon death) (Can save and load)
[BOSS] Asriel Dreemurr HP: 999999999 ATK: ∞ DEF: ∞ (made with Chara's Glitches) (can save and load) (Hyper Goner: 10 turns to charge)
Meanwhile in Shadrix's Ship...
Kirby, while looking at Bill Nye's progress, hears a familiar tune. It's the tune for the end credits sequence of DDLC. Kirby heads to the room to see Monika playing. She plays so elegantly. It's like she knows what she is doing. Kirby is surprised, "Monika?"
Monika stops and looks at Kirby with a smile, "You like it? Don't worry, I'm not really very good."
"Not very good? That was excellent! I loved it!" Kirby says with the biggest smile ever! Monika giggles, "Aww, thank you!"
"Do you remember where you learned that song?"
"I just came up with it myself, I think."
"Huh… Well I-"
Suddenly, alarms start blaring. Monika quickly gets up, "Okay everyone, music class is over, let's get out of here!"
Monika leaves and Kirby follows. Kirby heads back to his seat and Monika follows behind. She looks around the cockpit with awe. She then sees the players moving and doing their thing on the big screen. Kirby turns off the alarm surveys the situation. Kirby then points to the players, "See these guys? These are the players of this universe. They are here to help save the Multiverse!"
"That's quite a lot of people...wait, players? Is this all some sort of game?"
"Uhhhhhh…. Don't question it. Anyways…"
Kirby zooms in on one player, "This is Bill Nye!"
Monika gets a closer look, "Hi, Nye! Wait, can he hear me? I dunno, with how much he resembles Shadrix, he looks like a reused sprite to me."
"Unfortunately, no he can't. But his looks are no coincidence. Bill Nye is an android designed by W.D Gaster and Shadrix. He was built to be Shadrix's successor. He has 7 A.I's with him, each one a specific trait: 'Determination, Patience, Bravery, Integrity, Perseverance, Kindness, and lastly, Justice. Determination is the strongest of the bunch."
"That sounds so adorable! Kind of like one of the mangas that-"
"What?" Kirby says in a confused way, "Which one?"
"Our Lovely Llamas, I think it was called. Bunch of friends living in a network of tunnels under a mountain, and they had flower gems with different powers when they worked together. I never really got into manga, but she used to go on and on about it…
Wait a second, who was it? Nonono, I almost…!"
"Are you ok?" Kirby looks concerned.
"My head got so staticy, and loud, and painful..."
"... I have an idea. Come with me for a second."
Kirby gets up and heads down the hall. Monika follows clutching her head. Kirby heads to the dark hallway. Monika is unsure if this is safe, "This hurt enough as it is. I'm not sure if I want to remember. I might not know much, but what's left of me is still me. I don't wanna risk losing the rest of it. Imagine if you could delete your own existence with a click of a button...I wouldn't wish that on anyone."
Kirby turns around, "Don't worry, my idea won't hurt at all. Trust me!"
Kirby opens the door and inside is a room with a single chair with a giant helmet. The walls are filled with T.V's. Monika looks inside still clutching her head, "Somehow, this fine tribute to mad science doesn't scream 'trustworthy' or 'painless'."
"Don't worry, I do this with Shadrix every time he loses his memories. He never says it hurts. He built this dang thing. He made it so nothing will ever get hurt."
Monika slowly goes inside, "Okay, I'm buying this a little more, though it's concerning in itself that you guys lose your memories on a regular basis. Is this thing just inefficient, or what?"
"Nah it's just bad timing. Now, please take a seat!"
Monika slowly sits down. As soon as this happens, all T.V's turns on. The helmet slowly descends upon Monika's head. Inside the helmet has a tiny screen. The helmet turns on and static is seen. "Alright, All I need to do is input some stuff here and we should be good to go!"
Monika looks around in a frightening matter, "I can't see anything. There's static everywhere, everything, can't move, can't escape...SHADRIX WHERE ARE YOU?"
"Monika calm down! This is natural! Please… go with the flow! Trust me!"
Monika takes a deep breath, "Right. There's somebody here. I exist. I'm not alone. It'll be okay."
"Alright done! Now, In a few moments, we will see your recent memories and any other memories you may be hiding. And……… GO!"
The T.V's and the helmet display a room of sorts. It looks like the clubroom. There are 4 people who are staring at Monika. all of them are ghostlike and their faces are blank. Then, the next memory jumps to Monika deleting one of the names on the files. The names are completely blank. Then, The last hidden memory has her pressing a button that causes the whole area to go dark. The next memory shows her in the ship near the terminal where Kirby found her. Then, The T.V's turn off and the helmet ascends. Monika looks around to see Kirby in front of her, "I think they were my friends. Four of them. There was barely anything left. One little push, and everything, everywhere, gone, just like that. And then nothing, and then...I'm on this ship."
Kirby looks concerned, "... hmmm. It's still not all of the memories. Most of them are corrupted. It will take a while to restore them all. So for now, why don't we take a bre-"
Monika starts crying, "I deleted an entire universe! Everything I ever cared about! You should be down there fighting ME!"
"... I am sure there was a reason you pushed that button. It's hidden in the memories that are corrupted. Maybe someone forced you, or it was already decaying. We can't be sure."
Kirby hovers up and gives Monika a cute hug, "It'll be okay. Might take some time, but we'll figure this out, all right?!"
Monika then returned the hug, "You're giving me a chance, you think I'm worth knowing. I'll trust you on this, and I'm glad you're trying for me. If there's anything around here I might be able to help with, let me know, and I'll give it a shot, all right?"
"Got it! You can count on me!" Kirby smiles. "Now, let's head back to the piano room ok?"
"You've gotta show me how you play with those cute little nubs!"
In Omega Flowey's battleground...
Shadrix: Why does it feel like we have been out of the loop for a while?
Gaster: I HAVE NO IDEA.
Sans is simply taking a nap. He soon awakens when Omega Flowey screams at them. Shadrix realizes he has about enough and does his special attack. He activates the Chaos Emeralds inside his suit and goes Super. He fires many golden Beams and then flies right through Flowey. He deals 100,000 Damage! Sans and Gaster do a team attack and deals 100 damage. Omega Flowey attacks all 3 of them but the shield blocks most of it. The shields lose 30% integrity. He then uses the yellow soul to attack, creating many guns that fire at them. Shadrix calls for help once more and The Yellow soul regains control. All 6 souls rebel against Flowey and reduce his Defence to 0. Chara takes the souls before the others do and holds on to them.
Flowey was about to make his move but the Determination Beam that was fired a while back came crashing down onto Omega Flowey, obliterating him.
OMEGA FLOWEY DESTROYED
Chara teleports in slowly clapping. Well done... Very well done. You managed to take out Omega Flowey. However, I have one more trick up my sleeve!
Chara summons a bunch of glitches in his hand. He takes the souls and puts it in there. He takes a hard mode red soul and puts it in there as well. He then throws them into the air. The glitches and souls form together and explodes
When the dust settles. They see a figure floating in the air. They summon rainbow fire and throws it at Shadrix and the others. They all dodge out of the way.
I want you to welcome... HARD MODE ASRIEL DREEMURR!!
Asriel Dreemurr floats down to the ground with a smile on his face. Chara goes next to him and summons two red knives. Asriel summons a blaster and a sword.
Shadrix goes into offense mode which takes away all shields. Sans and Gaster both prepare their blasters.
AC
Shadrix HP: 99999999999999 ATK: ??? DEF: ??? (Suit set into ATK mode) (Filled with DETERMINATION)
sans HP: 1 DEF: 1 (Powered by Shadrix's DETERMINATION) (Has a 100% dodge rate) (dodge rate can lower if tired)
Gh@st3r HP: 666666 ATK: 6666 DEF: 66666 (Can't be harmed by normal means) (Can glitch out the enemy)
PC
Chara HP: 99 ATK: 99 DEF: 99 (Filled with Determination) (Has 6 Butterscotch Pies) (can be revived upon death) (Can save and load)
[BOSS] Asriel Dreemurr HP: 999999999 ATK: ∞ DEF: ∞ (made with Chara's Glitches) (can save and load) (Hyper Goner: 10 turns to charge)
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pionoplayer
The Destroyer
I vote to true multiplier orb our tank
Piono sighs.
"Alice, you're in danger. Not in the usual 'die and get your soul eaten by the Godmodder' kind of danger, but the more insidious 'having your mind devoured' kind of danger.
A short while back, we learned something interesting about Godmodding. Specifically, that its true origin is as a creation of The Devil, made to torment all the planes of reality for eternity.
Now, that in and of itself isn't that great a surprise, but it brings up something specifically.
Everything that the Devil makes comes with a catch, and the catch on Godmodding? Dying. More absolutely than Verraad himself could inflict on you right now without inordinate amounts of effort.
It wil beginl, and has probably already started, to eat away at your mind. Chipping away pieces of who and what you are, until there's nothing left of you. Instead, there will be that" Piono points at the Godmodder "or at the very least something like it, piloting your body."
He looks back at Alice. "I, and likely everyone else here mirrors this sentiment, am extremely greatful for your help. Not just that, but having a godmodder on our team? It's fantastic.
But I'd rather have you alive and well at the end of this, able to move forward once this is all said and done, than keep this powderkeg primed to kill you and then potentially everyone else afterwards.
The world needs help. It needs healing, restructuring... It needs so many things, between the Godmodder and all the other evils that plague it.
But it can't get any of that if that same evil kills and puppets the body of one of reality's best champions.
You can't make the world a better place if a demon has stolen your very existence for its own fell purposes."
He sighs again.
"At some point, as soon as possible, we need to find a way to destroy your soul orb. Your new powers are useful, but if they're going to destroy you from the inside out?
...I'd rather have a friend be depowered than killed, defiled, and puppeted by the enemy we just finished fighting."
SUPE TIME
I focus action my way into the supercharge machine
Focus: UTILITY
Specialty: IMPROVEMENT
Piono, while going into the machine also waves over to the 'spare' players.
"Cloak, Jamie, Ash, Xerath! If you can, spend some of your actions helping Cera blow through all the obstacles. I know some of the rest of us are trying to work on that but if we fall just short on that front we could blitz the whole thing down and get that monolithic sucker over there down in one round two phases in a row!
Also, one of you make sure to give Cera an attack stabilizer before they go if they make it all the way out with an action to spare, we wanna make absolutely certain the hit lands."
Piono sighs.
"Alice, you're in danger. Not in the usual 'die and get your soul eaten by the Godmodder' kind of danger, but the more insidious 'having your mind devoured' kind of danger.
A short while back, we learned something interesting about Godmodding. Specifically, that its true origin is as a creation of The Devil, made to torment all the planes of reality for eternity.
Now, that in and of itself isn't that great a surprise, but it brings up something specifically.
Everything that the Devil makes comes with a catch, and the catch on Godmodding? Dying. More absolutely than Verraad himself could inflict on you right now without inordinate amounts of effort.
It wil beginl, and has probably already started, to eat away at your mind. Chipping away pieces of who and what you are, until there's nothing left of you. Instead, there will be that" Piono points at the Godmodder "or at the very least something like it, piloting your body."
He looks back at Alice. "I, and likely everyone else here mirrors this sentiment, am extremely greatful for your help. Not just that, but having a godmodder on our team? It's fantastic.
But I'd rather have you alive and well at the end of this, able to move forward once this is all said and done, than keep this powderkeg primed to kill you and then potentially everyone else afterwards.
The world needs help. It needs healing, restructuring... It needs so many things, between the Godmodder and all the other evils that plague it.
But it can't get any of that if that same evil kills and puppets the body of one of reality's best champions.
You can't make the world a better place if a demon has stolen your very existence for its own fell purposes."
He sighs again.
"At some point, as soon as possible, we need to find a way to destroy your soul orb. Your new powers are useful, but if they're going to destroy you from the inside out?
...I'd rather have a friend be depowered than killed, defiled, and puppeted by the enemy we just finished fighting."
SUPE TIME
I focus action my way into the supercharge machine
Focus: UTILITY
Specialty: IMPROVEMENT
Piono, while going into the machine also waves over to the 'spare' players.
"Cloak, Jamie, Ash, Xerath! If you can, spend some of your actions helping Cera blow through all the obstacles. I know some of the rest of us are trying to work on that but if we fall just short on that front we could blitz the whole thing down and get that monolithic sucker over there down in one round two phases in a row!
Also, one of you make sure to give Cera an attack stabilizer before they go if they make it all the way out with an action to spare, we wanna make absolutely certain the hit lands."
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She/Her
Tank! Attack the Heckler!
I vote for True Multiplier Orb on the Tank.
1x action:
In a place far from here, atop a high mountain, there lived a wise sensei, a great master of martial arts, and of their attendant weapons. It was he who trained the greatest ninja of the world, the ones nobody has ever heard of. From him one could learn the way of the fists, and the way of the staff, and the way of the shuriken, the way of blending into a crowd even though you're wearing a full shinobi, and, most relevant to this discussion, the way of the sword. I should say katana. He was, after all, Japanese.
His training methods for the katana were eccentric, to say the least. In early days, when they were learning to slash and cut, he would toss fruit at his pupils and expect it to be bisected by the katana. It was, but the katanas would always rust through in time. The local blacksmith hated him! But the local fruit merchant loved him -- he was the best customer! In later days, he would add in small bombs which would explode if cut. These taught his pupils to stay their blade.
The Godmodder's Fruit Ninja never studied under this sensei. If he had, he would know not to cut everything in sight. But the Fruit Ninja is reckless, and overly aggressive. He will cut anything down that tries to hurt him.
As to how I know that the Godmodder's Fruit Ninja never studied under this sensei? Once, a lifetime ago, and before I ever thought of becoming a Player, I traveled to this sensei's dojo, seeking to train under him. He was dead by then, though this was not publicized. But I met with the bomb-maker who lives at the foot of the mountain -- the sensei had been a good customer for him, too -- and he told me two things. First, that he would take me on as an apprentice. And second, that any pupil of the sensei would rather die than serve the Godmodder. And indeed, most of them had.
From the bomb-maker, I learned how to craft small little round bombs that explode when cut. I have kept this knowledge with me until now, always making them in the same way for special occasions. Since I became a Player, I have used my Player powers to give them a little more oomph.
Now, I pull out a half-dozen of these bombs. They're decently sized, about as big as a lemon, but perfectly round except for the fuse. I light them, then toss them at the Fruit Ninja. He'll cut them down, I know. And he'll suffer for it.
2x action:
I pull out some stuffing, some fabric, and a Shard of Power (Scion showed up a while back. We took him down within a week.) This is a very specific Shard. Most people know it as Clairvoyant. Don't know what the Faerie Queen calls it, but she's not important to this.
I sit down and start sewing, quickly making a little plush man on the same scale as the little Doormaker. I build the Shard into it in just the right way, then add a little of my own power for the finishing touch.
I'm left holding a plush Clairvoyant. I give it a quick test run, put it through its paces. It turns out that I messed up a couple of the connections, so the plush Clairvoyant is less powerful than it should be. While holding it, the person holding the plush Clairvoyant can see what's happening anywhere in the overall cosmos, be that Earth, Heaven, Hell, the Shadow Realm (I check in on Cybil real quick before moving on), the HEXAGONAFIELD, or any alternate universe, dimension plane, or other means of classifying places. But there are two catches. First, the wielder has to have a rough idea of where they're trying to look at. And second, the plush Clairvoyant only allows you to see one place at a time, with a rough radius of 10 meters.
I move over to the plush Doormaker and set the plush Clairvoyant next to it. Without any prompting from me (okay, a little), the two plushes start hugging each other. It's kind of cute. I get the sense they won't be separable any time soon, and that they can be wielded as one item.
(SUMMARY)
1x action: throw little bombs at the Fruit Ninja
2x action: upgrade plush Doormaker with plush Clairvoyant
I vote for True Multiplier Orb on the Tank.
1x action:
In a place far from here, atop a high mountain, there lived a wise sensei, a great master of martial arts, and of their attendant weapons. It was he who trained the greatest ninja of the world, the ones nobody has ever heard of. From him one could learn the way of the fists, and the way of the staff, and the way of the shuriken, the way of blending into a crowd even though you're wearing a full shinobi, and, most relevant to this discussion, the way of the sword. I should say katana. He was, after all, Japanese.
His training methods for the katana were eccentric, to say the least. In early days, when they were learning to slash and cut, he would toss fruit at his pupils and expect it to be bisected by the katana. It was, but the katanas would always rust through in time. The local blacksmith hated him! But the local fruit merchant loved him -- he was the best customer! In later days, he would add in small bombs which would explode if cut. These taught his pupils to stay their blade.
The Godmodder's Fruit Ninja never studied under this sensei. If he had, he would know not to cut everything in sight. But the Fruit Ninja is reckless, and overly aggressive. He will cut anything down that tries to hurt him.
As to how I know that the Godmodder's Fruit Ninja never studied under this sensei? Once, a lifetime ago, and before I ever thought of becoming a Player, I traveled to this sensei's dojo, seeking to train under him. He was dead by then, though this was not publicized. But I met with the bomb-maker who lives at the foot of the mountain -- the sensei had been a good customer for him, too -- and he told me two things. First, that he would take me on as an apprentice. And second, that any pupil of the sensei would rather die than serve the Godmodder. And indeed, most of them had.
From the bomb-maker, I learned how to craft small little round bombs that explode when cut. I have kept this knowledge with me until now, always making them in the same way for special occasions. Since I became a Player, I have used my Player powers to give them a little more oomph.
Now, I pull out a half-dozen of these bombs. They're decently sized, about as big as a lemon, but perfectly round except for the fuse. I light them, then toss them at the Fruit Ninja. He'll cut them down, I know. And he'll suffer for it.
2x action:
I pull out some stuffing, some fabric, and a Shard of Power (Scion showed up a while back. We took him down within a week.) This is a very specific Shard. Most people know it as Clairvoyant. Don't know what the Faerie Queen calls it, but she's not important to this.
I sit down and start sewing, quickly making a little plush man on the same scale as the little Doormaker. I build the Shard into it in just the right way, then add a little of my own power for the finishing touch.
I'm left holding a plush Clairvoyant. I give it a quick test run, put it through its paces. It turns out that I messed up a couple of the connections, so the plush Clairvoyant is less powerful than it should be. While holding it, the person holding the plush Clairvoyant can see what's happening anywhere in the overall cosmos, be that Earth, Heaven, Hell, the Shadow Realm (I check in on Cybil real quick before moving on), the HEXAGONAFIELD, or any alternate universe, dimension plane, or other means of classifying places. But there are two catches. First, the wielder has to have a rough idea of where they're trying to look at. And second, the plush Clairvoyant only allows you to see one place at a time, with a rough radius of 10 meters.
I move over to the plush Doormaker and set the plush Clairvoyant next to it. Without any prompting from me (okay, a little), the two plushes start hugging each other. It's kind of cute. I get the sense they won't be separable any time soon, and that they can be wielded as one item.
(SUMMARY)
1x action: throw little bombs at the Fruit Ninja
2x action: upgrade plush Doormaker with plush Clairvoyant
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I cast spell to reduce the friction(to zero) of all goop affected ares for few seconds
This should make the goop fall right off them, i hope
Then the fallen goop is collected and thrown at Edit: New soulrazor killier ships
Thanks for the suggestion/help That-Random-Guy
This should make the goop fall right off them, i hope
Then the fallen goop is collected and thrown at Edit: New soulrazor killier ships
Thanks for the suggestion/help That-Random-Guy
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Free(?) Action:
Eyowe takes hungry_visitor's probably knocked-out body as his reward.
x3 Action:
Eyowe, using the power of [I Just Wasted 3 CP and My One Item So I Might Be Mildly Nettled Right Now and I'm About to Take it All Out on Some PG Mooks], not-so-violently-but-still-a-bit-violently wails on any PG enemy available, going along with Crusher's attack priority list.
Eyowe takes hungry_visitor's probably knocked-out body as his reward.
x3 Action:
Eyowe, using the power of [I Just Wasted 3 CP and My One Item So I Might Be Mildly Nettled Right Now and I'm About to Take it All Out on Some PG Mooks], not-so-violently-but-still-a-bit-violently wails on any PG enemy available, going along with Crusher's attack priority list.
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Action 1: I clean the Mark III Tactical Flashbang with a military clean.
Action 2: I have Cera get some sleep. In accelerated time.
Action 3: I use the final bit of charge from the pocket reactor to help a security guard kick the E3 Heckler out of E3. He won't be coming back.
Should I use the Red Army Swordsman to kill the E3 Heckler? It sounds like it'd be better against the Heckler than Fruit Ninja.
Cera Advice: You can break the solid and invisible walls. Annoying people aren't actually very good at obstructing, and if worst comes to worst you can probably just fling them across a room. I've taken care of the other obstacles, so...
Action 2: I have Cera get some sleep. In accelerated time.
Action 3: I use the final bit of charge from the pocket reactor to help a security guard kick the E3 Heckler out of E3. He won't be coming back.
Should I use the Red Army Swordsman to kill the E3 Heckler? It sounds like it'd be better against the Heckler than Fruit Ninja.
Cera Advice: You can break the solid and invisible walls. Annoying people aren't actually very good at obstructing, and if worst comes to worst you can probably just fling them across a room. I've taken care of the other obstacles, so...
Please refocus the goop towards the New Soulrazer Killer Ships, since unlike the tank they can die in a single digit number of rounds to millions of damage. Nothing's besides the Yoreblade is getting through the Unsealed Tank (again, without thousands upon thousands of rounds) except the set of uberitems we're saving for Tribulation 6/the Godmodder destroying the Yoreblade.
Vote: True Multiplier Orb on THE TANK. It's already strong enough to one-shot the ancient Soulrazer, let's make it even stronger.
3 Consecutive Actions + Economy Melting Banknote + : Remember the Economy-Melting Banknote? I remember the economy-melting banknote. I take it out, and stroll-well, teleport-into the lower reception area of a specific building in the plane of obstacles. From there, I waylay a intern, and explain to him that there is a very important guy-i.e. me-here with a tremendously powerful bank note, who wishes to enter discussions with the C.E.O of this very company as to its likely future use. Needless to say, this gets me into the upper reception area, where I see, 'lo and behold', a sign on the desk that says 'Out to Lunch'. That prompts me to oh-so-patiently wait.
Soon, the C.E.O. shows up, in quite a tizzy. (I imagine he expected the receptionist here to show me in.) The lack of receptionist renders him even more obsequious than usual. On the way up to the office, I easily convince him that if he were to take a few minor actions I will completely forget the snub of having to wait for him.
To be precise, make sure the various reception desks around here are always manned or womaned by a receptionist, for when I next show up, and for the love of god fire that one guy who made it so hard to tell you about this important opportunity to discuss the Economy Crashing Banknote. Oh, which guy? The intern? Definitely not him. He was great! Let him leave, I think, at 10, instead of 11. Maybe even slide him up the list of interns that might be hir-
hahahaha
Ha.
In all seriousness, I think he should get a hour off with no strings attached. (Hire a intern? Ridiculous, 'round here.)
Where was I?
Ah yes, there was the matter of that fool who so complicated my efforts.
Couldn't catch his name, he rushed off, but here written down is what I could make out.
You know the man? I thought you might, that's quite a distinctive name. I wonder who'll fill in his position. Finding someone with the appropriate skill in obsticalizing couldn't be-oh! I know someone perfect. Man named Cera, here's his description, he'll be along very soon. Very good at getting past obstacles, as well, comes of knowing so much about them.
Nice office. I am impressed by your improvisations in allowing the important few to move unmolested, so that this whole plane may maintain its proper state of obstacle-filledness.
hahahaha
Ha.
In all seriousness, I think he should get a hour off with no strings attached. (Hire a intern? Ridiculous, 'round here.)
Where was I?
Ah yes, there was the matter of that fool who so complicated my efforts.
Couldn't catch his name, he rushed off, but here written down is what I could make out.
You know the man? I thought you might, that's quite a distinctive name. I wonder who'll fill in his position. Finding someone with the appropriate skill in obsticalizing couldn't be-oh! I know someone perfect. Man named Cera, here's his description, he'll be along very soon. Very good at getting past obstacles, as well, comes of knowing so much about them.
Nice office. I am impressed by your improvisations in allowing the important few to move unmolested, so that this whole plane may maintain its proper state of obstacle-filledness.
After that, we talk for quite a while. (I am sure you have no desire to read all of that. [Besides, I have exams IRL.])
During those talks, I lay the groundwork for a number of long term modifications and upgrades to the Plain of Obstacles, with the help of my supreme capacity for navigating the place without delay. Those may or may not come to pass, but still a number of changes are made.
The Girl Scout's ovens become much easier to bake with, and a number of cooking cupboard finally become unlocked-ish. This stimulates a mass recall of Girl Scouts to take advantage of the massive opportunity to expand cookie selling operations, by baking more cookies. It definitely won't work out like that in practice, though, because a great many logistical bottlenecks (jammed pantry doors and so on) remain, but it'll definitely keep them busy for a while.
The panhandlers are hired, so that they can become Persistent Charity Solicitors! Booths in front of doorways! Bigger and more immovable people asking for money! Puppy Dog (doing Puppy Eyes) Brigades! Eventually. I doubt I need to explain how hard it will be to coordinate such a thing on the Plane of Obstacles.
There. Most of the Plane of Obstacles (as in the parts in the way of Cera) is distracted for however many turns it takes for them to deal with the many obstacles in front of them without Player Powers (or just plain dealt with), and if things go down to the wire I can batch-spend CP to, in short, stall the Godmodder's Army.
OOC: I am attempting to have the receptionists desk permanently manned, the man in a position you want fired (and Cera recommended as his replacement), the Girl Scouts distracted, hopefully Panhandler's distracted (as opposed to prevented from leaving their Pan Handling Positions by Obstacles), plus a bit of psuedo-RPing to enhance the option of directing some of the Plane of Obstacles at a target.
Edit: I back up Crusher48's effort to give the Tank the ability to do spare damage to other targets with 5 CP.
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I notice that the Godmodder is angry about being called a TF2 something, I stretch my freshly replaced Arms (made from scratch using my teeth using thin air as subatomic base material) and walk over to him.
"So, Godmodder, you hate the Truth about being called a TF2 Teammate Murderer? That's odd, that you hate the Truth about being a TF2 Teammate Murderer. After all, it's written right here, in this book called 'The Truth, and it says in this secret 9th chapter I just penned and put in there that Verraad is a TF2 Teammate Murderer. It says specifically that 'It is no surprise that Verraad, whose name means Betrayal, is a TF2 Teammate Murderer, because Verraad is an incompetent nincompoop except when he's being an asshole Godmodder, and being the best asshole Godmodder means being a TF2 Teammate Murderer. Since Verraad is the most dangerous and comptent Godmodder, that means he's also the best TF2 Teammate Murderer in existence. Which is true, because Verraad Murdered his Teammates in TF2. Also, he smell like blood and piss because he got those all over himself when he slaughtered the Sniper because he's a TF2 Teammate Murderer.'" I look up and smile broadly. "So.... Want to play a game of TF2?"
I proceed to use the Rage Cube to block the incoming Rage. I then toss the volatile Cube at the Attack Shield Obliterator, letting both disappear in a hellfire of Godmodder Rage, as well as any other [PG] forces that happened to get caught in the Crossfire.
With Action one done, I begin work on my next project.... And pause.
There was something I wanted to do... An Android. I pull out a drawing that I know wasn't there, but represented the idea and its importance to me anyway. It was a crude drawing, with a laser sword, GUrren Lagann styled jetpack + Wings, laser rifle, the laser weapons built into the arms that can switch to normal function and back, powered by an energy sphere that resembled a Will O' Wisp that might be her soul that could go into overclock mode and maybe allow her to do magic... And that was just the weaponry and features.
I snort gently. "I'd call you Mary if I didn't already have a name for you."
...I look to the Godmodder, then I look to Piono.
I then fold the paper up, and gently tuck it away.
Maybe there'd be time enough later. Right now, I had one last thing to accomplish.
Using my Second Action, I turn to find Arsenical, who was still here through sheer dint of the debt. Not only was he perfect for his debt, but his status as a Player made him perfect for my biggest and best idea to screw over the Godmodder once The Tank was triple dead.
Firstly, I had to make a special capsule. Using still valuable materials processed through time accelerated eons long techniques, I begin building it around Arsenical. I draw upon every technique I've ever used to shape and reforged and remake the materials to their perfect forms. I draw upon my experience with hyperadvanced machinery from back when I fought the other Godmodder. I draw even furhter from the eerilly accurate false memories from this Godmodder Fight to make the cirucitry and then program it to utmost precision.
I harness every bit of Creation that the Player Powers represent. I harness every bit of Problem solving they had come to be known by.
I create THE CAPSULE. It is effectively indestructible from the inside and out. More importantly, it is further modifiable, because it is not done yet. It merely is the centerpiece that the rest of its fundamental idea is based upon.
The next piece, arguably, is the most important part. I pull a thread of my own power out and examine it. I examine how it interacts to create Entities. I examine how it interacts with things that are already created to bolster them. I examine how it interacts with things that are not of our own making. I compile this knowledge and perfect it in machine form.
Using symbols that depict God as I know him and his miracles as the basis for the magical symbology, I carve a large laser dish array from pure Salt. The grade stuff that exorcises ghosts and demons. The kind that I have to overlay with even more pure Gold to keep its power contained and make it impossible to interfere with anything outside of the intended target. Finally, I dip the finished product(so that the Gold also protects the Salt from the properties of water) in a vat of Holy Water made by TRUE BELIEVERS, for maximum Faith, and run my Player power into it to create channels for all Player Power to flow through and for Hydrogen to flow through as well so it can act as a primer, since it's the fundamental building block atom of the conventional Universe.
I attach it to THE CAPSULE and dub it the RE-CREATOR (no relation to the anime of similar/same name). When Primed with Player Power, it'll fire a beam of pure Creation that will instantly vaporize and Re-Create whatever it hits into something else or into multiple something elses! Arsenical, being AFK, will naturally donate said energy, but in case of an emergency I do have a means of powering it myself.
This leaves the THREE SLOTS that remain on THE CAPSULE. These three slots are connected together to work in tandem for a singular Purpose. However, since I was out of Actions...
I'd just have to Spend a CP to make the next one! This baby needs to be finished ASAP so I can focus on Jailbreaking Cera out of the obstacle course!
This next piece is a new headache in and of itself. Its purpose is to scan the inside of THE CAPSULE and latch onto certain concepts or energies. This will then be fed to the last two pieces that will be attached to THE CAPSULE for their purpose. However, my target is something a bit more complex than I care to admit.
The target has to do with Arsenical's Debt. It's still connected to something. I need what's on the other end for my endgame for Disabling the Godmodder. But how does one quantify such a connection? Do I focus on mere "Devil/Lucifer/Satan" Energies? What if there's no energy tag in Arsenical? What if the Debt operates in a different manner entirely?
As I think, I feel a pulse of power. I look to my Inventory.
The X-Blade. Its time wasn't now, but looking at it gave me the answer I sought.
I immediately portaled away from the Battlefield. I ended up in the laboratory of Ansem the Wise from Kingdom Hearts, once again diving into those references. It's not my own creation, so either some other Player was REALLY into Kingdom Hearts, or Kingdom Hearts was a Thing all along. I hoped it was the latter. If it was the former... Well, hopefully my presence will allow whoever is here to make peace with their fates.
I find what I'm looking for- his old notes on the nature of Bonds, and read. It's exhausting. As it turns out, it's like reading a Memetic Tier JOEpost, but with better text formatting and even worse dense terminology augmented by the MOST PURPLE PROSE I'VE EVER SEEN. The Temporal Guardian visits meseveral times and timeloops me back again and again so I can parse the dense, heavy to understand text. I want to cry out to the Heavens, but that'd just annoy them since they're already here trying to fight the Godmodder back in the Tribulation. I weep. I need glasses. Then I realize that I just put glasses on my glasses and switch them out for a stronger brand. When that brand fails and my eyes can no longer see, I realize I can create new eyes with my powers and do so.
My eyes still break down, so I make alien eyes. Multiple varieties. They all break down irreparably.
But by the time I've outlasted the COR and gotten myself peak human eyes again, I had done it. The notes were read and parsed. I proceeded to give Ansem the Wise the bird on my way out, making sure not to bump into any of the swarm of time looped selves lounging about doing the reading I just finished with.
I make my way back to the Tribulation the long way. While walking, I take some Friendship, some Antagonism, and some good old Fashioned Light and Darkness and tape them together into a facsimile of a Heart. I proceed to hook up said heart to an Omni-Scanner, and the Omni-Scanner into an Intelle-Reader. By the time I'm finished with this, I jam the construct into the Mod Port it belongs in.
There. Now I have the Bond Reader. It likes spy novels and can scan Arsenical and the nature of his Debt to find the thing at the other end of the Line. The data will not only read out dramatically on the Intele-Reader portion, it'll also feed the information into the next part of THE CAPSULES intended modifications.
I restrain the urge to whimper. That, too, can come later.
ACTION SUMMARY:
Action 1: Taunted the Godmodder to empower the Rage Cube to max levels, then detonated it to annihilate the Attack Shield Obliterator and any [PG] Enemies within the 'splash zone'
Action 2: Created the indestructible (From within and without) THE CAPSULE around Arsenical.
Action 3: Created the RE-CREATOR to channel Arsenical's (Or someone else's in a pinch) Player Power and use it to 'Re-create' anything into either something else, or multiple someone elses.
CP Action: Created the Bond Reader, which will scan Arsenical's Debt to understand what is so I can later track what it is connected to with a later modification to THE CAPSULE.
"So, Godmodder, you hate the Truth about being called a TF2 Teammate Murderer? That's odd, that you hate the Truth about being a TF2 Teammate Murderer. After all, it's written right here, in this book called 'The Truth, and it says in this secret 9th chapter I just penned and put in there that Verraad is a TF2 Teammate Murderer. It says specifically that 'It is no surprise that Verraad, whose name means Betrayal, is a TF2 Teammate Murderer, because Verraad is an incompetent nincompoop except when he's being an asshole Godmodder, and being the best asshole Godmodder means being a TF2 Teammate Murderer. Since Verraad is the most dangerous and comptent Godmodder, that means he's also the best TF2 Teammate Murderer in existence. Which is true, because Verraad Murdered his Teammates in TF2. Also, he smell like blood and piss because he got those all over himself when he slaughtered the Sniper because he's a TF2 Teammate Murderer.'" I look up and smile broadly. "So.... Want to play a game of TF2?"
I proceed to use the Rage Cube to block the incoming Rage. I then toss the volatile Cube at the Attack Shield Obliterator, letting both disappear in a hellfire of Godmodder Rage, as well as any other [PG] forces that happened to get caught in the Crossfire.
With Action one done, I begin work on my next project.... And pause.
There was something I wanted to do... An Android. I pull out a drawing that I know wasn't there, but represented the idea and its importance to me anyway. It was a crude drawing, with a laser sword, GUrren Lagann styled jetpack + Wings, laser rifle, the laser weapons built into the arms that can switch to normal function and back, powered by an energy sphere that resembled a Will O' Wisp that might be her soul that could go into overclock mode and maybe allow her to do magic... And that was just the weaponry and features.
I snort gently. "I'd call you Mary if I didn't already have a name for you."
...I look to the Godmodder, then I look to Piono.
I then fold the paper up, and gently tuck it away.
Maybe there'd be time enough later. Right now, I had one last thing to accomplish.
Using my Second Action, I turn to find Arsenical, who was still here through sheer dint of the debt. Not only was he perfect for his debt, but his status as a Player made him perfect for my biggest and best idea to screw over the Godmodder once The Tank was triple dead.
Firstly, I had to make a special capsule. Using still valuable materials processed through time accelerated eons long techniques, I begin building it around Arsenical. I draw upon every technique I've ever used to shape and reforged and remake the materials to their perfect forms. I draw upon my experience with hyperadvanced machinery from back when I fought the other Godmodder. I draw even furhter from the eerilly accurate false memories from this Godmodder Fight to make the cirucitry and then program it to utmost precision.
I harness every bit of Creation that the Player Powers represent. I harness every bit of Problem solving they had come to be known by.
I create THE CAPSULE. It is effectively indestructible from the inside and out. More importantly, it is further modifiable, because it is not done yet. It merely is the centerpiece that the rest of its fundamental idea is based upon.
The next piece, arguably, is the most important part. I pull a thread of my own power out and examine it. I examine how it interacts to create Entities. I examine how it interacts with things that are already created to bolster them. I examine how it interacts with things that are not of our own making. I compile this knowledge and perfect it in machine form.
Using symbols that depict God as I know him and his miracles as the basis for the magical symbology, I carve a large laser dish array from pure Salt. The grade stuff that exorcises ghosts and demons. The kind that I have to overlay with even more pure Gold to keep its power contained and make it impossible to interfere with anything outside of the intended target. Finally, I dip the finished product(so that the Gold also protects the Salt from the properties of water) in a vat of Holy Water made by TRUE BELIEVERS, for maximum Faith, and run my Player power into it to create channels for all Player Power to flow through and for Hydrogen to flow through as well so it can act as a primer, since it's the fundamental building block atom of the conventional Universe.
I attach it to THE CAPSULE and dub it the RE-CREATOR (no relation to the anime of similar/same name). When Primed with Player Power, it'll fire a beam of pure Creation that will instantly vaporize and Re-Create whatever it hits into something else or into multiple something elses! Arsenical, being AFK, will naturally donate said energy, but in case of an emergency I do have a means of powering it myself.
This leaves the THREE SLOTS that remain on THE CAPSULE. These three slots are connected together to work in tandem for a singular Purpose. However, since I was out of Actions...
I'd just have to Spend a CP to make the next one! This baby needs to be finished ASAP so I can focus on Jailbreaking Cera out of the obstacle course!
This next piece is a new headache in and of itself. Its purpose is to scan the inside of THE CAPSULE and latch onto certain concepts or energies. This will then be fed to the last two pieces that will be attached to THE CAPSULE for their purpose. However, my target is something a bit more complex than I care to admit.
The target has to do with Arsenical's Debt. It's still connected to something. I need what's on the other end for my endgame for Disabling the Godmodder. But how does one quantify such a connection? Do I focus on mere "Devil/Lucifer/Satan" Energies? What if there's no energy tag in Arsenical? What if the Debt operates in a different manner entirely?
As I think, I feel a pulse of power. I look to my Inventory.
The X-Blade. Its time wasn't now, but looking at it gave me the answer I sought.
I immediately portaled away from the Battlefield. I ended up in the laboratory of Ansem the Wise from Kingdom Hearts, once again diving into those references. It's not my own creation, so either some other Player was REALLY into Kingdom Hearts, or Kingdom Hearts was a Thing all along. I hoped it was the latter. If it was the former... Well, hopefully my presence will allow whoever is here to make peace with their fates.
I find what I'm looking for- his old notes on the nature of Bonds, and read. It's exhausting. As it turns out, it's like reading a Memetic Tier JOEpost, but with better text formatting and even worse dense terminology augmented by the MOST PURPLE PROSE I'VE EVER SEEN. The Temporal Guardian visits meseveral times and timeloops me back again and again so I can parse the dense, heavy to understand text. I want to cry out to the Heavens, but that'd just annoy them since they're already here trying to fight the Godmodder back in the Tribulation. I weep. I need glasses. Then I realize that I just put glasses on my glasses and switch them out for a stronger brand. When that brand fails and my eyes can no longer see, I realize I can create new eyes with my powers and do so.
My eyes still break down, so I make alien eyes. Multiple varieties. They all break down irreparably.
But by the time I've outlasted the COR and gotten myself peak human eyes again, I had done it. The notes were read and parsed. I proceeded to give Ansem the Wise the bird on my way out, making sure not to bump into any of the swarm of time looped selves lounging about doing the reading I just finished with.
I make my way back to the Tribulation the long way. While walking, I take some Friendship, some Antagonism, and some good old Fashioned Light and Darkness and tape them together into a facsimile of a Heart. I proceed to hook up said heart to an Omni-Scanner, and the Omni-Scanner into an Intelle-Reader. By the time I'm finished with this, I jam the construct into the Mod Port it belongs in.
There. Now I have the Bond Reader. It likes spy novels and can scan Arsenical and the nature of his Debt to find the thing at the other end of the Line. The data will not only read out dramatically on the Intele-Reader portion, it'll also feed the information into the next part of THE CAPSULES intended modifications.
I restrain the urge to whimper. That, too, can come later.
ACTION SUMMARY:
Action 1: Taunted the Godmodder to empower the Rage Cube to max levels, then detonated it to annihilate the Attack Shield Obliterator and any [PG] Enemies within the 'splash zone'
Action 2: Created the indestructible (From within and without) THE CAPSULE around Arsenical.
Action 3: Created the RE-CREATOR to channel Arsenical's (Or someone else's in a pinch) Player Power and use it to 'Re-create' anything into either something else, or multiple someone elses.
CP Action: Created the Bond Reader, which will scan Arsenical's Debt to understand what is so I can later track what it is connected to with a later modification to THE CAPSULE.
Paradoxdragonpaci
Schrödinger’s Dragon
I vote to true multiplier orb our tank
(1CP+2 Actions)I grasp the empty Vial that once contained Liquid Mind Aspect, the teal Aspect of Logic and concentrate.Logic,Rationality and Innovation, these are the core attributes of the Mind Aspect, the Aspect of Decisions.I refill the Mind Vial as it fills up with the Electric Teal Liquid And stopper it for later use.
(1 Actions) I clean the goop off the Ash Aragamis with Sponges and Disposable Napkins and give them to Winkins
(1CP+2 Actions)I grasp the empty Vial that once contained Liquid Mind Aspect, the teal Aspect of Logic and concentrate.Logic,Rationality and Innovation, these are the core attributes of the Mind Aspect, the Aspect of Decisions.I refill the Mind Vial as it fills up with the Electric Teal Liquid And stopper it for later use.
(1 Actions) I clean the goop off the Ash Aragamis with Sponges and Disposable Napkins and give them to Winkins
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ES sighs at the sight of the Goop, and hands over a mop and bucket to Amelia. "Take care of it."
"But sir, I-" She gets a swift glare for a response.
"I said take care of it."
She hangs her head and gets to work, cleaning off the Constructor Drones, then the Apex, then any AG Entity that's still gooped by this point, with the Psychic Overlord the lowest priority (I.E only degoop if it's the only gooped one left.)
Constructor Drones and Fleet Beacon work on the Attack Frigates again. The Fleet targets the E3 Heckler, or another of the PG Army Entities if it's already dead. Spectral Lords are to fire their charged cannons.
"But sir, I-" She gets a swift glare for a response.
"I said take care of it."
She hangs her head and gets to work, cleaning off the Constructor Drones, then the Apex, then any AG Entity that's still gooped by this point, with the Psychic Overlord the lowest priority (I.E only degoop if it's the only gooped one left.)
Constructor Drones and Fleet Beacon work on the Attack Frigates again. The Fleet targets the E3 Heckler, or another of the PG Army Entities if it's already dead. Spectral Lords are to fire their charged cannons.
She/Her
I vote to use the orb on the Tank.
I grab all of the tool on my Ash Aragami, and feed it to Excalibur, giving Excalibur the ability to goop up enemies with its new Goopcalibur form.
I grab all of the tool on my Ash Aragami, and feed it to Excalibur, giving Excalibur the ability to goop up enemies with its new Goopcalibur form.
[1x] Ianother version of JOE just so its not me saying the same thing twice sees the Godmodder dropping Cera into the plane of obstacles
"Not So Fast, Godmodder!!"
"You see, while the Plane may seem like an issue, I'll note none of the listed obstacles bar potentially the invisible wall will serve any purpose against a sleeping person who is unbound by the laws of gravity! and wouldn't you know it, I know how to unbind something from the laws of gravity AND how to put them to sleep! Observe."
first of all, I unbind Cera from the laws of gravity. this negates the incline. My methodology here is to throw white paint at the ground below them, then throw cartoonish bombs at the painted ground. White holes are the opposite of Black holes, and black holes pull things in, so these white holes will push Cera away! Furthermore, I toss them a jetpack to let them manouver forwards.
Now, I have to put them to sleep so the mental events don't do anything. But this is a simple thing to do! Why, I've done it by accident. I need simply discuss my dreams. a small speaker attached to the Jetpack pipes up as soon as they've got it all attached, and emits these sounds:
"Hello, Cera! You know, I had some wonderful dreams a short time ago, just wonderful! I was in a role-playing game area, but I'd skipped the tutorial! I was way underleveled for the area, which of course was no issue ever. I soon met a demon which was also a god, and decided to be allied with me! They asked what I wanted, and I decided on an item to give me an AoE to kill whatever's nearby, not including me! They were a very nice demon, or they needed something from me, whichever, so they gave me exactly what I wanted! then I wanted to go visit them, so they created a sort of staircase made of black dots but I think the way I got up was a jetpack instead, or maybe something was carrying me. while in the air, it kind of looked like I was playing minecraft with a low render distance. Anyway, I was way up in the air, and the drop off was probably dangerous, so I went exploring! I met some demons who didn't believe me, and then I got shunted into a dungeon! The first level was vulnerable to AoE, but the second wasn't, so I farmed levels there. a little later, the dream ended and I woke up."
I pause for a few moments, catching my breath, then continue.
"a little later, I went back to sleep and had an even better dream! I was exploring a landscape and there were cool looking places! One of them looked nether-y, like the one that's sending us reinforcements, and I got the impression somehow it was because someone wanted to look cool, but wasn't really dangerous! Something to do with college? anyway, I went to explore! there were little ravines and holes in the ground and it was all pretty brown! I kept finding further paths down inside the fissures into other caves and fissures, and at some point I turned a corner and it all stopped looking netheric. It was a normal set of caves, and peaceful! I walked through it a little, and there were some pools of water at the bottom of holes in the caves! The pools reflected a tranquil, starlit sky, even though I was in a cave, and it was nice to look at. there were some rocks or maybe a stalactite in the pool which obscured part of the view. after a little while I kept walking and there were a few beings which looked like transparent mirrors i think but they also looked suspiciously like the window in the room I was sleeping in copied and pasted a few times. we talked for a little and after a short while I woke up, and discovered unusually bright light coming through the window in the room i was sleeping in, which explains why."
At this point, Cera is hopefully asleep, and the Jetpack auto-steers them along towards the exit of the plane.
[1x] no, the Taint on the field is for if/When one of our current entities dies, It'll do its best to puppet their corpse and bring it back. I proceed to supercharge it further, and make sure it's immune to this particular brand of goop so things slain by that will remain viable.
[1x] Then I see the Godmodder's army advancing on the Angels! I'd go help, but there are things in the way... And then I look up and see the Godmodder, being a Godmodder and doing Things!
"Not So Fast, Godmodder!!!!!"
This is probably getting annoying. but also i think it's funny too. anyway!
"You thought you could be a Godmodder like you're being and do all that stuff you're doing, didn't you? No longer! You're like, Totally going to die! and stop being able to do things! which is like when you commit die!"
Then I throw an apple at him. And stand there.
Naturally, the Apple can't do anything to him. he still has the Unsealed Tank.... shield... thing. . .
So it's rather awkward. Then I throw a snowball at him. and stand there.
Naturally, the Snowball can't do anything to him. because shield thing.
Then I throw a firebolt at him and stand there!
Naturally, the firebolt can't do anything to him, because you know why.
Then I throw an orb of Knife at him!
Naturally, the Orb of Knife can't do anything to him, because... shush I'm getting to something.
Then I use my mouth to throw sound at him, telling him all about my dreams!
Naturally, it can't do any damage to him, but the shield admits sound, so it's still annoying! and no, that's not what I was getting to.
Then I throw a plate at him! and stand there! (while continuing to throw sound about my dreams at him)
Naturally, it can't do damage to him.
Then I turn on strobe light eyes like i'm sanes but such much strong! and stand there!
Naturally, this can't harm him, but it's really annoying!
I continue this for a significant period of time. Perhaps the Godmodder sets the shield to block light and sound. perhaps he starts ignoring me. perhaps his mind wanders. perhaps he gets bored. Perhaps this distracts him so much he loses actions. perhaps he spends an action running away (I follow). who knows?
while (Godmodder has begun to near peak annoyance OR I have begun to run out of material to talk about, colors to flash, and things to throw) AND ( Godmodder has a momentary lapse of attention), I unleash my plan!
I shoot him with a mayonais guNO. That's not my plan shut up. Ahem! I unload a special item from my inventory into the air in front of me!
A Godmodder Lock! With an instants motion- faster then the Godmodder can match, due to his lapse of attention- I duck back even as the field activates. The Godmodder is now Trapped in a Godmodder Lock! This means he can't do things! Which is like when you commit die!
Hopefully this will trap him for a significant period of time! or... hm...
I make sure to leave a note inside the area saying that an aperture which lets through 1/10th of non-solid-state-power will open in one turns time or something. should somewhat reduce incentive for escape, though I'm not sure if such Apertures are even Possible.
"Not So Fast, Godmodder!!"
"You see, while the Plane may seem like an issue, I'll note none of the listed obstacles bar potentially the invisible wall will serve any purpose against a sleeping person who is unbound by the laws of gravity! and wouldn't you know it, I know how to unbind something from the laws of gravity AND how to put them to sleep! Observe."
first of all, I unbind Cera from the laws of gravity. this negates the incline. My methodology here is to throw white paint at the ground below them, then throw cartoonish bombs at the painted ground. White holes are the opposite of Black holes, and black holes pull things in, so these white holes will push Cera away! Furthermore, I toss them a jetpack to let them manouver forwards.
Now, I have to put them to sleep so the mental events don't do anything. But this is a simple thing to do! Why, I've done it by accident. I need simply discuss my dreams. a small speaker attached to the Jetpack pipes up as soon as they've got it all attached, and emits these sounds:
"Hello, Cera! You know, I had some wonderful dreams a short time ago, just wonderful! I was in a role-playing game area, but I'd skipped the tutorial! I was way underleveled for the area, which of course was no issue ever. I soon met a demon which was also a god, and decided to be allied with me! They asked what I wanted, and I decided on an item to give me an AoE to kill whatever's nearby, not including me! They were a very nice demon, or they needed something from me, whichever, so they gave me exactly what I wanted! then I wanted to go visit them, so they created a sort of staircase made of black dots but I think the way I got up was a jetpack instead, or maybe something was carrying me. while in the air, it kind of looked like I was playing minecraft with a low render distance. Anyway, I was way up in the air, and the drop off was probably dangerous, so I went exploring! I met some demons who didn't believe me, and then I got shunted into a dungeon! The first level was vulnerable to AoE, but the second wasn't, so I farmed levels there. a little later, the dream ended and I woke up."
I pause for a few moments, catching my breath, then continue.
"a little later, I went back to sleep and had an even better dream! I was exploring a landscape and there were cool looking places! One of them looked nether-y, like the one that's sending us reinforcements, and I got the impression somehow it was because someone wanted to look cool, but wasn't really dangerous! Something to do with college? anyway, I went to explore! there were little ravines and holes in the ground and it was all pretty brown! I kept finding further paths down inside the fissures into other caves and fissures, and at some point I turned a corner and it all stopped looking netheric. It was a normal set of caves, and peaceful! I walked through it a little, and there were some pools of water at the bottom of holes in the caves! The pools reflected a tranquil, starlit sky, even though I was in a cave, and it was nice to look at. there were some rocks or maybe a stalactite in the pool which obscured part of the view. after a little while I kept walking and there were a few beings which looked like transparent mirrors i think but they also looked suspiciously like the window in the room I was sleeping in copied and pasted a few times. we talked for a little and after a short while I woke up, and discovered unusually bright light coming through the window in the room i was sleeping in, which explains why."
At this point, Cera is hopefully asleep, and the Jetpack auto-steers them along towards the exit of the plane.
[1x] no, the Taint on the field is for if/When one of our current entities dies, It'll do its best to puppet their corpse and bring it back. I proceed to supercharge it further, and make sure it's immune to this particular brand of goop so things slain by that will remain viable.
[1x] Then I see the Godmodder's army advancing on the Angels! I'd go help, but there are things in the way... And then I look up and see the Godmodder, being a Godmodder and doing Things!
"Not So Fast, Godmodder!!!!!"
This is probably getting annoying. but also i think it's funny too. anyway!
"You thought you could be a Godmodder like you're being and do all that stuff you're doing, didn't you? No longer! You're like, Totally going to die! and stop being able to do things! which is like when you commit die!"
Then I throw an apple at him. And stand there.
Naturally, the Apple can't do anything to him. he still has the Unsealed Tank.... shield... thing. . .
So it's rather awkward. Then I throw a snowball at him. and stand there.
Naturally, the Snowball can't do anything to him. because shield thing.
Then I throw a firebolt at him and stand there!
Naturally, the firebolt can't do anything to him, because you know why.
Then I throw an orb of Knife at him!
Naturally, the Orb of Knife can't do anything to him, because... shush I'm getting to something.
Then I use my mouth to throw sound at him, telling him all about my dreams!
Naturally, it can't do any damage to him, but the shield admits sound, so it's still annoying! and no, that's not what I was getting to.
Then I throw a plate at him! and stand there! (while continuing to throw sound about my dreams at him)
Naturally, it can't do damage to him.
Then I turn on strobe light eyes like i'm sanes but such much strong! and stand there!
Naturally, this can't harm him, but it's really annoying!
I continue this for a significant period of time. Perhaps the Godmodder sets the shield to block light and sound. perhaps he starts ignoring me. perhaps his mind wanders. perhaps he gets bored. Perhaps this distracts him so much he loses actions. perhaps he spends an action running away (I follow). who knows?
while (Godmodder has begun to near peak annoyance OR I have begun to run out of material to talk about, colors to flash, and things to throw) AND ( Godmodder has a momentary lapse of attention), I unleash my plan!
I shoot him with a mayonais guNO. That's not my plan shut up. Ahem! I unload a special item from my inventory into the air in front of me!
A Godmodder Lock! With an instants motion- faster then the Godmodder can match, due to his lapse of attention- I duck back even as the field activates. The Godmodder is now Trapped in a Godmodder Lock! This means he can't do things! Which is like when you commit die!
Hopefully this will trap him for a significant period of time! or... hm...
I make sure to leave a note inside the area saying that an aperture which lets through 1/10th of non-solid-state-power will open in one turns time or something. should somewhat reduce incentive for escape, though I'm not sure if such Apertures are even Possible.
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I vote to use the True Multiplier Orb on THE TANK.
Focus. I start cleaning the Goop off the Osttrupen and Healbot through hard work. Everysingle men goes into a decontamination procedure, and proceed to take a shower with lots of soap. The Osttruppen are also dropped in a bath that helps them cleaner. The Healbot is meticulously taken apart, every part cleaned with SUPER soap, and resembled back together.
Orders
Priority:
All Units attack the New Soulrazer Killer Ship->Fruit Ninja->Simplicity->E3 Heckler->☺
Focus. I start cleaning the Goop off the Osttrupen and Healbot through hard work. Everysingle men goes into a decontamination procedure, and proceed to take a shower with lots of soap. The Osttruppen are also dropped in a bath that helps them cleaner. The Healbot is meticulously taken apart, every part cleaned with SUPER soap, and resembled back together.
Orders
Priority:
All Units attack the New Soulrazer Killer Ship->Fruit Ninja->Simplicity->E3 Heckler->☺
The quiet watcher
Verified Old One
The quiet watcher breaks out laughing at the foolishness of the Godmodder. He teleports to the Unsealed Tank, grasps it, and preforms Zangief's screw pile driver through a portal, slamming it into the Plane of Obstacles and through one of the Obstacle generators and imbeds it into the fabric of the plane, ensuring that it was stuck as he poured all of his actions into this single move. After all, he muses as he picks up more of a spin to drill through the generator beneath the Unsealed tank using its immense durability to act as an unstoppable force, if your foe won't let you go to him, you bring the foe to you.
I look at the masses of Godmodder Goop that have smothered parts of the LIVE Space Station. "Well damn it. Sweepers, man your brooms!" As all the engineers under my command prepare to do do some emergency cleaning, I focus on transforming into MR CLEAN, THE GOD OF CLEANING. Armed with endless supplies of powerful detergents and cleaners, I and my engineers scamper all over the shield battery and the quadcopter deployers to thoroughly scrub every last inch of them free of the damaging goop! I also load up some water guns with soap to spray off any goop that landed on the quadcopters themselves!
I order the station's weaponry to open fire on the E3 Heckler, and to use the tractor beam to try holding the ☺(Or Simplicity, if ☺ is dead).
I order the station's weaponry to open fire on the E3 Heckler, and to use the tractor beam to try holding the ☺(Or Simplicity, if ☺ is dead).
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FlamingFlapjacks
Employment Opportunities
I help JOE.
that's not something i ever thought i'd say
x1 I stride up to him and aid him in putting Cera to sleep via the patented Sleeponatiner 20,020! The Sleeponatiner 20,020 may or may not literally just be me holding up a plastic ray and yelling "GO TO SLEEP GO TO SLEEP GO TO SLEEP". It still works, somehow?
x2 I then turn to the Obstacle Generators. Instantly, cardboard props burst out of nowhere, forming a background that looks strangely like.. a generic western town? Wait no, it is a background for a generic western town. Fake tumbleweeds blow across the floor, and I pull out a pair of flintlocks, turning around. A sockpuppet in the background counts down. 3.. 2.. 1..
I whirl around and shoot the Generators with the Flintlocks. Huh, that's weird. They didn't even bother to turn around? Don't they know how gunfights work? I sigh, and ride in the sunset on another sockpuppet, this one vaguely looking like a horse. The set collapses behind me, crushing the generators. Without looking back, I fire a shot. The bullet misses, and ricochets through the whole Plane, before bouncing back in just the right way to cut the string holding the fake sun up, causing it to fall down and explode, setting the generators on fire.
x1 I stride up to him and aid him in putting Cera to sleep via the patented Sleeponatiner 20,020! The Sleeponatiner 20,020 may or may not literally just be me holding up a plastic ray and yelling "GO TO SLEEP GO TO SLEEP GO TO SLEEP". It still works, somehow?
x2 I then turn to the Obstacle Generators. Instantly, cardboard props burst out of nowhere, forming a background that looks strangely like.. a generic western town? Wait no, it is a background for a generic western town. Fake tumbleweeds blow across the floor, and I pull out a pair of flintlocks, turning around. A sockpuppet in the background counts down. 3.. 2.. 1..
I whirl around and shoot the Generators with the Flintlocks. Huh, that's weird. They didn't even bother to turn around? Don't they know how gunfights work? I sigh, and ride in the sunset on another sockpuppet, this one vaguely looking like a horse. The set collapses behind me, crushing the generators. Without looking back, I fire a shot. The bullet misses, and ricochets through the whole Plane, before bouncing back in just the right way to cut the string holding the fake sun up, causing it to fall down and explode, setting the generators on fire.
1. I use the machine with the words utility and progress
2. I pick up an old project... (70% complete)
3. Working on the bomb... (75% complete)
2. I pick up an old project... (70% complete)
3. Working on the bomb... (75% complete)
Action 1: Two ships... There are two new ships... No, don't do it... But, it'll be so much fun. And the Godmodder doesn't need two ships... But remember what happened last time... Yes and no. Last time there was the buff guy and that whole music theme that just mucked everything up... NO... ye-e-e-es... Fine, fine. But do it next turn. Crusher's got a point... YES!
The writer rubs his forehead. What was that?... Never mind. Okay, the black box is saving THE MACHINE for later since half of everyone is using it or messing with the goop. Alright... The writer has a promise to make this round funnier and by that he/she means more better. "What's funnier than a rapper priest?" the Writer writes sarcastically. "A janitor." ... Ugh, not again!? Fine, fine, an old janitor makes his way out of the black box, sweeping up the dust as he does. Actually, he looks a bit familiar... yeah, he was here all the way back at the box's second round. Apparently the box is running out of ideas. Well, anyways, the janitor keeps sweeping up the battlefield, somehow missing the random chaos happening around him. "This place is filthy," he mutters. "I'd better get paid double for this." As he continues sweeping, he accidentally bumps into [Insert PG (Army) Unit] (any at all). "Oh, sorry. Just doing my job. Could you please move?" Unfortunately, the PG unit doesn't want to move for some filthy AG scum. "Really, you could just step a few inches to the side and I could be on my way." The PG unit doesn't budge. "Alright sonny, if you don't move right now, I will show you what decades of practice can accomplish." The PG unit ignores him. "Alright then, you asked for it." The janitor reaches into his pocket and pulls out a black belt. Oh... so karate then... fine... He ties it around his waist and stands at the ready, hands held in front of him, anticipating every move. Then, he strikes. He starts with two quick chops, followed by a roll to the left. He leaps to his feet and delivers two punches. He then tilts just a bit to the side, dodging any potential attacks. He then plants one foot firmly on the ground and delivers a full roundhouse kick. As he kicks, he looses just a bit of balance and rolls to the left again. He then holds his hands to the sides of his face, his right leg perched up, and performs a perfect crane kick for the finisher. Now, this whole combo would be great and all, but the janitor left his glasses at home and has some depth perception issues. Therefore, he was exactly three inches away from landing every blow. The old janitor gasps for breathe as he recovers from such exertion. "I was- I was testing you. Yes- Yes, I was- that was *wheeze* all a test. Now, let's see if you can handle THE BASICS." Thunder claps in the background as the janitor says the words "THE BASICS". He takes off the black belt, throws it in his pocket, and takes out a sponge and a spray bottle. He sprays the PG entity's, stinging its eyes with water. He then takes the sponge and kind of uses it to slap the PG unit, mimicking the well known "wax on, wax off" technique. "Much better." He pushes the PG entity out of the way and keeps cleaning.
Action 2: "Really, the nerve of that guy." The janitor throws his broom back into the box and rolls out a mop cart. He looks around for where to start his methodical cleaning crusade and notices that [Insert PG (Army) Unit] (still don't care which one) is making quite a mess. Really, just by standing there, he's creating more garbage than a volcano spews lava. How rude. Doesn't he know about recycling? The janitor heads over there and confronts him. "Look here, I already have a tough enough job as it is cleaning up after these Players. I don't need you stupid PG entities making more of a mess than they do. So, if you don't mind, stop LITTERING!" No matter how... charismatic?... the janitor might be, insulting the PG side doesn't get him anywhere as far as diplomacy. The PG entity sits there, not caring about his so called "mess". The janitor starts to fume. "Why, I ought'a... I ought'a..." The janitor grabs his mop and spins it around in front of him. It's actually quite impressive. He then steps forwards and prepares his mop combo. Unfortunately, he fails, yet again. He had forgotten to drain the wet mop's water back into the bucket, so he was actually spinning around a wet mop. This mop then got water all over, causing him to slip and fall as he stepped forwards. "Curse these old bones. I'd get up and fight if I could only get up." Determined to stop this PG unit from littering, he takes the mop, spins it over his head, and whacks the mop bucket, sending it rolling straight into the PG entity. The PG trooper is sent spinning and falls into the bucket. The bucket keeps rolling, and rolling, and rolling. The PG entity scrambles to get up out of the bucket, only to find itself rolling into a spacial rift. "Huh. I wonder how that got there."
The PG entity finds itself rolling down nice, scenic Death Spike Mountain. The name... well, the name explains itself. The only other thing a hiker might need to know is that it is exactly twice as tall as Mount Everest. The bucket immediately runs into huge rocky spikes, usually bouncing off of the base of the spike. Then it starts to encounter a small, mountain side forest. The bucket rams into a couple of trees, slows to an almost complete stop each time, but then shifts just a bit to the side and keeps going. After the bucket's nice trot through Death Spike Forest, it comes to Little Death Spike Ridge, the ideal camping ground for Lil' Death Spike Mountain Scouts (YOU CAN BUY COOKIES NOW FOR JUST $11.99 per cookie.). The PG entity inevitably falls into the trap of buying Lil' Death Spike Mountain Scout Cookies (or just Lil' Scout Cookies for regular buyers) and spends a whopping $143.88. Now this might not seem like much, but he hasn't gotten his week's salary and is all out of spending cash. That's gonna hurt. There's also the tiny rock spikes that break off the ridge and impale the bucket, but being $143.88 in debt with an $100 PG salary is just... unbearable. Next up is some more just regular big death spikes, nothing out of the ordinary there. Then, finally, is Death Spike Mountain Canyon of Death Spikes (somebody needs to fire the guy naming these). As one may assume, it is a canyon at the bottom of Death Spike Mountain that is filled with Death Spikes. As the PG entity falls down the canyon, it sees the river that made the canyon. Hoping beyond hope that it can survive, it leaps from the bucket and aims for the river, trying to slow its fall as it does. In some ways, it succeeds. It does successfully slow itself and aim itself for the river. However, the bucket falls faster than the PG entity, having more mass from the Little Death Spikes. It lands on the Death Spikes at the bottom of the canyon and somehow bounces off, flying right back to the PG entity. Said entity is blinded as the bucket falls onto its head. The PG unit falls into the river, only to find another convenient rift.
The PG unit reappears in the battlegrounds, still rolling in the bucket. It rolls about for just a minute before stopping just in front of the other spacial rift. The janitor notices this. "Eh, to heck with it." He grabs the mop and pokes the bucket just a bit forward, sending the bucket and PG unit back through that gauntlet AGAIN. (Of course, this time the inserted PG is able to avoid the immense financial damage of his first trip, so the second trip is actually quite relaxing, even with the obscene number of Death Spikes.)
Action 3: The janitor finally gets up off the ground and decides that the whole place needs a good scrubbing. He yet again looks for somewhere to start, and notices that [Insert Another PG (Army) Entity] is in immense need of a bath. "Ugh, kids these days. They're parents just pamper them until they don't know how to do anything when they grow up." With his stereotypical complaints out of the way, the janitor whistles and gestures for the black box to unload some more equipment. The box floats over next to the final PG (Army) Entity and dumps out an entire car wash on top of it. Of course, we can't have this be just a normal car wash. This is a super specific [Insert PG (Army) Entity] Wash! TM. This attack's target is thrust through a long series of cleaning methods. First is the soap, lots of soap. Huge squirt guns filled with the stuff fire at the entity, getting soap everywhere (including his digestive system. Yikes!). Next is the water. Why is the water second? Because everyone knows that water washes off the soap, so if the thing is wet the soap isn't as effective (maybe). Anyways, the unit is submerged in a water torture chamber for a good 10 minutes (Rule of thumb: If the user doesn't look like an actual prune after the first ten minutes, let him rest there for an extra five). Since the PG unit looks as close to a prune as it's getting, it moves onto the next stage: Drying. The start of this stage isn't actually too different from a normal car wash. Giant brushes try to dry off the unit, doing little to nothing to be honest. Then we go to drying phase two, the janitor's personal favorite. A giant clothing iron smashes the PG entity and leaves burns just about everywhere. And now, it is time for the most important step. The janitor steps out of the control room and examines the customer. "Good," he concludes after intense examination. "Here's your complimentary pine tree scent thing." The janitor shoves the fake tree in the entities mouth and pats him off to have a good rest of his day.
Finally, the black box scoops up the [Insert PG (Army) Entity] Wash! TM, taking the old janitor with it. Hmm... the writer might have gone a bit more insane than actually funny there... oh well, the writer enjoys it.
The writer rubs his forehead. What was that?... Never mind. Okay, the black box is saving THE MACHINE for later since half of everyone is using it or messing with the goop. Alright... The writer has a promise to make this round funnier and by that he/she means more better. "What's funnier than a rapper priest?" the Writer writes sarcastically. "A janitor." ... Ugh, not again!? Fine, fine, an old janitor makes his way out of the black box, sweeping up the dust as he does. Actually, he looks a bit familiar... yeah, he was here all the way back at the box's second round. Apparently the box is running out of ideas. Well, anyways, the janitor keeps sweeping up the battlefield, somehow missing the random chaos happening around him. "This place is filthy," he mutters. "I'd better get paid double for this." As he continues sweeping, he accidentally bumps into [Insert PG (Army) Unit] (any at all). "Oh, sorry. Just doing my job. Could you please move?" Unfortunately, the PG unit doesn't want to move for some filthy AG scum. "Really, you could just step a few inches to the side and I could be on my way." The PG unit doesn't budge. "Alright sonny, if you don't move right now, I will show you what decades of practice can accomplish." The PG unit ignores him. "Alright then, you asked for it." The janitor reaches into his pocket and pulls out a black belt. Oh... so karate then... fine... He ties it around his waist and stands at the ready, hands held in front of him, anticipating every move. Then, he strikes. He starts with two quick chops, followed by a roll to the left. He leaps to his feet and delivers two punches. He then tilts just a bit to the side, dodging any potential attacks. He then plants one foot firmly on the ground and delivers a full roundhouse kick. As he kicks, he looses just a bit of balance and rolls to the left again. He then holds his hands to the sides of his face, his right leg perched up, and performs a perfect crane kick for the finisher. Now, this whole combo would be great and all, but the janitor left his glasses at home and has some depth perception issues. Therefore, he was exactly three inches away from landing every blow. The old janitor gasps for breathe as he recovers from such exertion. "I was- I was testing you. Yes- Yes, I was- that was *wheeze* all a test. Now, let's see if you can handle THE BASICS." Thunder claps in the background as the janitor says the words "THE BASICS". He takes off the black belt, throws it in his pocket, and takes out a sponge and a spray bottle. He sprays the PG entity's, stinging its eyes with water. He then takes the sponge and kind of uses it to slap the PG unit, mimicking the well known "wax on, wax off" technique. "Much better." He pushes the PG entity out of the way and keeps cleaning.
Action 2: "Really, the nerve of that guy." The janitor throws his broom back into the box and rolls out a mop cart. He looks around for where to start his methodical cleaning crusade and notices that [Insert PG (Army) Unit] (still don't care which one) is making quite a mess. Really, just by standing there, he's creating more garbage than a volcano spews lava. How rude. Doesn't he know about recycling? The janitor heads over there and confronts him. "Look here, I already have a tough enough job as it is cleaning up after these Players. I don't need you stupid PG entities making more of a mess than they do. So, if you don't mind, stop LITTERING!" No matter how... charismatic?... the janitor might be, insulting the PG side doesn't get him anywhere as far as diplomacy. The PG entity sits there, not caring about his so called "mess". The janitor starts to fume. "Why, I ought'a... I ought'a..." The janitor grabs his mop and spins it around in front of him. It's actually quite impressive. He then steps forwards and prepares his mop combo. Unfortunately, he fails, yet again. He had forgotten to drain the wet mop's water back into the bucket, so he was actually spinning around a wet mop. This mop then got water all over, causing him to slip and fall as he stepped forwards. "Curse these old bones. I'd get up and fight if I could only get up." Determined to stop this PG unit from littering, he takes the mop, spins it over his head, and whacks the mop bucket, sending it rolling straight into the PG entity. The PG trooper is sent spinning and falls into the bucket. The bucket keeps rolling, and rolling, and rolling. The PG entity scrambles to get up out of the bucket, only to find itself rolling into a spacial rift. "Huh. I wonder how that got there."
The PG entity finds itself rolling down nice, scenic Death Spike Mountain. The name... well, the name explains itself. The only other thing a hiker might need to know is that it is exactly twice as tall as Mount Everest. The bucket immediately runs into huge rocky spikes, usually bouncing off of the base of the spike. Then it starts to encounter a small, mountain side forest. The bucket rams into a couple of trees, slows to an almost complete stop each time, but then shifts just a bit to the side and keeps going. After the bucket's nice trot through Death Spike Forest, it comes to Little Death Spike Ridge, the ideal camping ground for Lil' Death Spike Mountain Scouts (YOU CAN BUY COOKIES NOW FOR JUST $11.99 per cookie.). The PG entity inevitably falls into the trap of buying Lil' Death Spike Mountain Scout Cookies (or just Lil' Scout Cookies for regular buyers) and spends a whopping $143.88. Now this might not seem like much, but he hasn't gotten his week's salary and is all out of spending cash. That's gonna hurt. There's also the tiny rock spikes that break off the ridge and impale the bucket, but being $143.88 in debt with an $100 PG salary is just... unbearable. Next up is some more just regular big death spikes, nothing out of the ordinary there. Then, finally, is Death Spike Mountain Canyon of Death Spikes (somebody needs to fire the guy naming these). As one may assume, it is a canyon at the bottom of Death Spike Mountain that is filled with Death Spikes. As the PG entity falls down the canyon, it sees the river that made the canyon. Hoping beyond hope that it can survive, it leaps from the bucket and aims for the river, trying to slow its fall as it does. In some ways, it succeeds. It does successfully slow itself and aim itself for the river. However, the bucket falls faster than the PG entity, having more mass from the Little Death Spikes. It lands on the Death Spikes at the bottom of the canyon and somehow bounces off, flying right back to the PG entity. Said entity is blinded as the bucket falls onto its head. The PG unit falls into the river, only to find another convenient rift.
The PG unit reappears in the battlegrounds, still rolling in the bucket. It rolls about for just a minute before stopping just in front of the other spacial rift. The janitor notices this. "Eh, to heck with it." He grabs the mop and pokes the bucket just a bit forward, sending the bucket and PG unit back through that gauntlet AGAIN. (Of course, this time the inserted PG is able to avoid the immense financial damage of his first trip, so the second trip is actually quite relaxing, even with the obscene number of Death Spikes.)
Action 3: The janitor finally gets up off the ground and decides that the whole place needs a good scrubbing. He yet again looks for somewhere to start, and notices that [Insert Another PG (Army) Entity] is in immense need of a bath. "Ugh, kids these days. They're parents just pamper them until they don't know how to do anything when they grow up." With his stereotypical complaints out of the way, the janitor whistles and gestures for the black box to unload some more equipment. The box floats over next to the final PG (Army) Entity and dumps out an entire car wash on top of it. Of course, we can't have this be just a normal car wash. This is a super specific [Insert PG (Army) Entity] Wash! TM. This attack's target is thrust through a long series of cleaning methods. First is the soap, lots of soap. Huge squirt guns filled with the stuff fire at the entity, getting soap everywhere (including his digestive system. Yikes!). Next is the water. Why is the water second? Because everyone knows that water washes off the soap, so if the thing is wet the soap isn't as effective (maybe). Anyways, the unit is submerged in a water torture chamber for a good 10 minutes (Rule of thumb: If the user doesn't look like an actual prune after the first ten minutes, let him rest there for an extra five). Since the PG unit looks as close to a prune as it's getting, it moves onto the next stage: Drying. The start of this stage isn't actually too different from a normal car wash. Giant brushes try to dry off the unit, doing little to nothing to be honest. Then we go to drying phase two, the janitor's personal favorite. A giant clothing iron smashes the PG entity and leaves burns just about everywhere. And now, it is time for the most important step. The janitor steps out of the control room and examines the customer. "Good," he concludes after intense examination. "Here's your complimentary pine tree scent thing." The janitor shoves the fake tree in the entities mouth and pats him off to have a good rest of his day.
Finally, the black box scoops up the [Insert PG (Army) Entity] Wash! TM, taking the old janitor with it. Hmm... the writer might have gone a bit more insane than actually funny there... oh well, the writer enjoys it.