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The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Join Date:
2/7/2014
Posts:
72
Location:
The Mindscape
Minecraft:
Irecreeper
Member Details
=Turn Two=
(9 / 20) A Construction (+2 total from Jon, Cobalt)
(10 / 10) Identity Crisis -> Summoning...
+1 to Jon
+1 to Cobalt
=Summon=
A small jukebox descends from above, coupled with a parachute. It lands on the Battlefield, then starts blaring music.
"YOU'RE A KID NOW YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID NOWWWWWW"
Suddenly, some of the battlefield is carpeted with Ink, as two figures super-jump onto the battlefield!
[AZ] Inkling (Splattershot)
HP: 20,000
Attacks:
Ink Burst: Fires a small salvo of orange ink. Deals light damage to two entities. Adds 1 stack of Ink to each target.
Burst Bomb: Causes a small ink explosion, dealing moderate damage to one entity. Adds 1-2 stacks of Ink.
Bomb Rush: Uses Burst Bomb three times in a row. Cannot hit a target multiple times. 3 Turn Charge.
Passive:
Ink: If an entity obtains 5 stacks of ink, they explode in an inky burst, taking high damage! Upon exploding, Ink stacks drop to 0.
[AZ] Inkling (Splat Charger)
HP: 20,000
Attacks:
Charge Shot: Charges up a powerful shot! Deals high damage, but takes a turn to fire. (akin to Pokemon's Solar Beam) Adds 3 stacks of Ink to the target.
Splat Bomb: Summons a 3,000 HP Splat Bomb! The bomb explodes one turn after summoning if not killed, dealing high damage to two random entities. Hit targets obtain 2 stacks of ink.
Bomb Rush: Uses Splat Bomb three times in a row. 3 Turn Charge.
Passive:
Ink: If an entity obtains 5 stacks of ink, they explode in an inky burst, taking high damage! Upon exploding, Ink stacks drop to 0.
=Action=
I then equip both Inklings with Fireproof armor, to negate / minimize damage from the terrain. The armor is created from finest dragon scales, improved with the finest in candy-armor technology.
The Inkling with the Splattershot will use Burst Bomb on the Beta Phantom, while the Inkling with the Splat Charger will use Splat Bomb.
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Join Date:
4/30/2014
Posts:
72
Location:
The Nether (of course!)
Minecraft:
SolidMastR
Xbox:
No, just no
PSN:
ManiacMastR
Member Details
The L()rd tries out the alchemiter.
Glove || Diamond Sword = ???
While waiting for that, he proceeds to shoot the SOAPtank (or a phantom if it's dead) with a Deja Vu gun. While waiting for that, he proceeds to shoot the SOAPtank (or a phantom if it's dead) with a Deja Vu gun.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
THE PROPHECY SEEMED FAR AWAY
BUT FINALLY WE'VE REACHED THE DAY
GIVE UP THE PAST, EMBRACE THE STRANGE
EVERYTHING YOU CARE ABOUT WILL CHANGE
I take out a pretzel, then pull out Pricey's vocal cords and use them to top the pretzel. Since UserZero's favorite food is pretzels and her favorite pretzel topping is vocal cords, she is incredibly desperate to get it. I then order her to go on a quest for it, but she's too smart for that and knows that it would be entirely too long, annoying, contradictory and possibly even damaging. I'm proud of her genre savviness, so I offer to give it to her if she just punches herself as far back and as damagingly as possible. If she attacks me, I just burn the pretzel to ashes.
((OK I think I get it, but about the alchemies, do I have to somehow get it earlier or just get it magically now))
Weather Golems: 1/10
I create a simple wooden sword, ProZero people laugh. I then hit them and it launches them into the sky, (as it had the enchantment fast.high.levitation but dealing no damage. when they come back down it does though
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I'm almost completely inactive, in case you're trawling through really old threads and notice me somewhere.
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Location:
Both here
Join Date:
1/5/2012
Posts:
245
Location:
and there at once.
Minecraft:
same as this one
Xbox:
Don't have one
PSN:
Don't want one
Member Details
HA! THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I'VE DAMAGED THE GODMODDER! And it was with a stupid reference to Corner Gas... huh...
Game play question... Do charges have to be used up all at once? I was thinking of making two parallel 50 post charges. One summons an entity and whenever it attacks it uses up 5 posts worth of charge from the other 50 post charge. Also, you can't make entities stronger than 50 posts worth of stuff, but can you heal them with charges? Seems like you should be able to. Also, could we please NOT have a duplicator? The duplicator made potions really useless. Maybe give them two or three charges instead.
I finish my first summon! Ticker tape parade! With a massive 5/5 post charge, I get out a LOT of balloons and start tying them together in what looks like the shape of a small dragon. I summon the BALLOON WHELP! Let's start off nice and simple. ... Simple for me anyway.
[AZ] HP: 1,000,000/1,000,000 (it's not supposed to die from HP damage. It has a different system to counter act this.)
Inflation: 100%. If this reaches either 200% or 0%, the Balloon Whelp will either pop or just kinda sag. Either way, that kills it instantly. Whenever the Balloon Whelp takes direct damage, that reduces its inflation by (damage taken) / 500. Or, if the attacker uses a sharp implement, the inflation loss is multiplied by 1.5. So it taking 5,000 damage will deflate it by 10% or 15% if the attacker used something like a sword or needle. People can inflate it in a similar manner. Count it as the amount they would have healed / 500.
Its damage is a little below average (about 3,000 per hit). However, for every 20% above 100% inflation, its damage increases by 10%. For every 20% below 100% inflation, its evasion increases by 5%. Counts as airborn while its inflation is above 150% if that matters at all.
Special attack: Helium breath. Can be used once every other turn. Doing so will reduce inflation by 15% to deal 5,000 damage to two enemies and make their voices high pitched and squeaky, meaning nobody can take them seriously anymore. For the next two turns, their damage is reduced by 20%.
See? Simple. Only 3 paragraphs of text. Nerf/buff as needed. It's supposed to be kinda tanky though. It attacks one of the two phantoms with its colorful balloon claws, but not before I get out an air pump and inflate it some more by pumping wildly.
Charges: 5/50
5/25
+1 to Mythic, +1 to Topazian
=====For the most part, this is the relevance line. Cross at your own risk=====
I look towards Mikoto, Inari and the Veteran and I gasp. I had suspected that there was some kooky time travel stuff happening, but now I knew for sure. Funny how things work out. Just a few days ago, I was staring at Wilson's terrible paw writing and feeling guilty for not stopping Inari and Mikoto from fighting each other in their game. Eventually, each would pick a puppet champion to manipulate and force against the other spirit's champion. Inari happened to choose Wilson and Mikoto happened to choose Willow. Now, I happened to like both of them and knew that if they were forced to fight each other, the winner might end off worse than the loser. But now, I had the chance to warn everyone about what would happen to drive Mikoro and Inari apart like that. I started running towards them, feeling like I could save Wilson before he was even born, but I stopped. If I warned everyone on what was to come, Wilson would die. Without Inari, he would be just a normal fox and die to that stupid terror spider. Would that effect the second war? If Wilson died, then I would never get the Staff of Ysera, and who knows what rippling butterfly effect that could have? At best, nothing. At worst, all my companions would die to that glitch like thing that would end up destroying Minecraft because I wasn't there to teleport them out. So, according to that, I shouldn't warn Mikoto. But if I did that, then several people would suffer, such as Mikoto, Inari, Gail, the Veteran, and... myself. Was the safety of five worth the life of one? And what about when twenty more lives might depend on that one? I felt like the doctor in all those moral dilemma situations. So I stood there, paralyzed with indecision. Luckily for me and the story, my internet provider made the decision for me as my connection timed out and I stopped existing. How dues ex machina. I had only planned on staying here as an actual fighting force until I established my other characters. If I do make another appearance, it will probably be past me. So... bye.
Mikoto watches me vanish before looking up at the Veteran, surprised and by the tone of his voice, afraid.
Jid she just... reply to you? Even though you were speaking a different language that only... five people know?
The Veteran, on the other hand, did not look or sound impressed.
And while she was both several chunks away and fighting off just about everyone? Yes. She did. As a godmodder, she can read Talist's translations. Rou uliu kous qie'uliu plues mier cinplsunkrl cinpllèsununs, uliununs.
Now he addresses UserZero directly.
If by "one of them" you mean your end, you're right. The only one Psi actually managed to kill was that guy who appeared for about ten seconds. Seems like a poor track record. Let's see what you have. We probably aren't as strong as you, but we are so much more resilient.
The Veteran takes the Sleuth's candy corn and turns it over in his hands. What if I want to make it a plot device, huh?
Thank you? I expected to see at least one other fighter from before. We don't have much else to do, I suppose. Mikoto, catch.
Huh? Catch wh- ah!
The Veteran flicked the bit of candy corn towards Mikoto, causing it to bounce off his head and land on a nearby rock.
Hrmph. Fery funny.
=====Alchemies=====
A couple of chunks back, Gail was following the Veteran. Mikoto had told her to stay behind, but she wanted to explore and see what was going on for herself. She wasn't that strong, so she was staying a good distance behind. I changed my avatar specifically because I had no other way to exactly describe Gail. So, she looks like that, white like snow or pearl. She seemed to be constantly streaming mist behind her that quickly dissipated in the sunlight. Along the way to see what was happening, she found something called an "alchemiter". Looking at it, she felt a strange sense of deja-vu. Well, not exactly because deja-vu implies an echo to a previous event. This felt like an echo to a future event, and one that didn't even involve her. Regardless, she tried it out.
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Join Date:
3/13/2011
Posts:
61
Minecraft:
crystalcat
Member Details
dARKnESS 10/25. (+1 from Richard.)
Proteus 10/10. COMPLETED! (+1 from Richard.)
+1 to Erelye, +1 to Twin.
Crystal sees the Alchemiter is finally available. “Ahh, just like old times. Now I can really start to have fun."
Wand of Magic Missile && Minigun == Magic Missile Minigun 1/?
WAND OF MAGIC MISSILE: A wand that allows the holder to invoke the spell Magic Missile.
MINIGUN: Shamelessly swiped from TF2.
Sword && Coyote’s Tooth == ??? 1/?
DAGGER: A basic dagger. Not much to see here.
COYOTE’S TOOTH: From Gunnerkrigg Court - a knife that is sharp enough to cut iron girders like butter, cut a falling steel bearing in half without stopping its fall, and sharp enough to cut a shadow man from the floor. Resonates with the trickster-god Coyote’s laughter when unsheathed. Also has the alternate form of a normal-looking coyote tooth.
10/10 EXPENDED!
Crystal raises his hands to the sky, invoking his granted powers of entity-summoning for the first time since joining DTG in the first place. A restrained summoning circle forms around him, a rip opening in the very fabric of reality and dumping out a normal-looking person. Until it shifts and forms a normal-looking earth elemental. And then a normal-looking Alpha Phantom. And then it just reverts to its true form, a gangly-looking humanoid with features that look only half there.
Doppelganger summoned!
Alignment: Anti-Zero.
HP: Normal for a 10-post charge- 40,000 perhaps?
Passive: Shapechange: The doppelganger reflexively shapeshifts to blend in with enemies, changing forms at a whim. There is a 10% chance an attack aimed at it will miss and hit a Pro-Zero entity instead.
Crystal summons a cloud of daggers formed of pure force, then magically compresses all of them into one dagger and throws that dagger at the SOAPTank. When it hits, it explodes in a burst of magical daggers, slicing through the SOAPTank.
Crystal pulls out a sniper rifle, aims at the SOAPTank, and… CRACK! Hey, that wasn’t a bullet. It was a bullet that, on hit, teleports everything within a 2-meter radius 500 meters straight up! After a few seconds, the SOAPTank crashes back down onto the ground, metal crumpling from the hit.
Realizing that it might be a little while before doggy can arrive, he begins to hatch another plan. He needed a way of getting some bodies on the field. Bomber takes out his phone again and decides to search his list extensive list of contacts for an answer.
"Lets see, Scrazz is busy, Michel is setting up doggy already, busy...busy...oh. Oh, here we go."
A long time ago Bomber had gone out on a night of drinking and made a few buddies. In particular, the owner of a bar known as The Grim Guzzler. Coren Direbrew was his name, and keeping everyone absolutely hammered is his game. Bomber offered to give the place extra funding, an offer Coren couldn't refuse. More money meant more booze for him and his rambunctious friends. The Grim Guzzler is the sort of place where a myriad of interesting characters would drink, so it was the perfect resource to tap into. Bomber dialed the number, and answered a voice with a thick Scottish accent.
"Hey Coren. It's Bomber. I'm going to have to call in a favor."
"Oh, anythin' fur ye! What do ye need?"
"I'll need you to fire up a Mole Machine and send some of your lackeys over to me. I have the coordinates if you need them."
"How do ye plan to get 'em over there? From what I can tell, ye happen to be in another dimension or *hic* somethin'."
"I already have that covered. You should be getting a prototype Interdimensional Mole Machine delivered soon. It's basically a modification of the old Mole Machine and will get anyone almost anywhere, provided they have the dimensional coordinates. Which I do."
"Great! Now, I have ta ask ye another thing...what is in it for them? What do ye even need them for, anyhow?"
"The reason I need them is their incentive. I'm in probably what will be one of the biggest fights they will ever witness and I'm certain they would love to get a piece of the action. Plus, I'll buy you the next round of drinks."
"Then ye have a deal!"
And with that, Bomber had finished another request. It wouldn't be too long before some of Coren's irritable regulars arrive. And once they arrive, they will do their absolute best to pull as many of their friends into the brawl as well. Yes-- for them, it would be the bar fight of legends.
Bomber then stretched out his arm, which began glowing green. Wisps of ghostly fog curl around his arm, growing denser as they began to collect in his palm. An ethereal skull began to materialize, making a sound akin to cackling. Suddenly the skull was launched from Bomber's hand, wailing as it flew towards UserZero. The green fog that trailed the skull would start to choke anyone who lingered within its presence for too long. If the deathly bolt would impact, the target would feel crippling pain as if their very life were being sapped.
Doggy's Battery: 5/20 ==================== (+1 from Erelye, +1 from Modpack)
Mole Machine Inbound: 1/10 ===========
+2 to generic_username
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JECMQQUWS EMKMTTAP; BEM HTOSMZG GH DZWJ UMVAEQLV SPD DWZQWVAW PXDGE WTTI JDQOX IKL OJEY BEM VCRVMPB DKGSB XXHGACA JWJVAWA TQDN GZ UXL XTOX BEMAT FPIOA
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Location:
0rgin P0int, Zeroth Server
Join Date:
2/28/2011
Posts:
63
Location:
why
Minecraft:
User_Zero
Xbox:
Battlefury13
PSN:
no
Member Details
I cast Spambot Protection Shield on the Lesser Earth Elemental (1500 Shield Hp)
5/9 Factory(
4/10 Spell book
2+ to Richard's summoning
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
"THIS IS EQUAL PARTS FUNNY AND SAD."
"STOP LAUGHING AND KILL THE BUNNY!"
"YOU'RE GETTING QUOTED ON THAT ONE, CALLING IT NOW. WHY ARE YOU LOSING IT OVER ONE ENEMY ANYWAY?"
"I DON'T KNOW! THERE'S A BLANK SCREEN WHENEVER I PERFORM A MEMORY SEARCH! NOTHING SHOWS UP!"
After Uzi accidentally tripped the alarm, soldiers flood in! They have anti-godmodding powers that prevent them from being one-hit ko'd by Zero's epic godmodding powers. Also, the base as a whole disables much of her abilities-turns out it's an entire anti-godmodding base! The soldiers move to attack her, but at least they're relatively weak.
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
A group of eldritch abominations invade the base! They are innately resistant to godmodding, ans quickly pummel Zero! She has to fight them, and they're VERY strong!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
A group of gods and goddesses from various pantheons invade the boss! What's more, they're all SUPERPOWERED for no reason at all! And have quadruple the resistance to godmodding anything else has ever had ever!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
Memetic versions of everything ever invade the base! That's right, literally every single object or person that has ever existed, ever, has been given thought, extreme superpowers, and anti-godmodding abilities! And they all have been imbued with an innate hatred for Zero!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
I summon up hundreds of undead warriors to rush at Zero, and start spinning, summoning a vortex that engulfs everything in it's path. Once this has damaged something I return everything to the ground and grab some bones.
Summons:
The Ground 7/25
There is No Other Way 5/10
+2 to Cryptic
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Join Date:
5/20/2014
Posts:
60
Location:
Defending my castle
Minecraft:
dandeman13
Member Details
+2 to Erelye
Small Base 10/15
Leather Braced Handle && Iron Hammer Head == Iron Forge Hammer 2/?
Orb of Fire && Orb of Light == Holy Flame 2/?
I take out a brick and hurl it at Zero. However, I miss... I hurl twenty bricks at zero, and all those miss too. 'Alright, that's it'. I take out a cannon easily hidden underneath a hill, and fire it into the air. This causes a hail of bricks that... misses Zero. 'ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?' I then throw the last of my bricks up in the air, frustrated. Unfortunately, that lands right on my head...
'ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT'.
What zero doesn't notice is that this was meant to make me angry. So angry that I run at super speed (Remember it's super speed, normal speeds are not cool whatsoever) and kick her right in the face!
And then I calm down...
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
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I complain that Tazz switched the AG and PG colors for the AZ and PZ colors.
((I thought that the Anti-Zero players had all those entities....Bluh.))
I explicitly changed them because Richard's forces were always represented by blue, while UserZero is represented by a color very close to straight red.
Anyway, User charging stuff is a bad thing, I use chalk to mess up her summon should she be using a summoning circle by drawing a hopscotch grid in the middle of it, I als0 thr0w glitter int0 her eyes t0 blind her, if its another kind of summ0n
JOHN CENA (4/10) +1 from Jondanger
+1 to Piono and +1 to Megaminer
It's neither of those things-the Sumoning Circles are made of pure godmodding energy. UserZero blinks all the glitter out of her eyes.
"Uh oh. Somewhere along the line of the SOAPTank being summoned, a rogue Typo (probably because a Spambot was distracting the First Guardian) turned it into the SOPATank! And it decided the earlier appearance of the Slightly Fatter Panda was a copyright infringement on Kung Fu Panda, so now it wants to shut down access to the server!"
The SOPATank turns Hostile, gains doubled stats, and begins attempting to shut down the server. Its ultimate objective is to reach Yggdrasil and use it to shut down the server somehow (one of the crew suggested that destroying Yggdrasil will destroy the server, and no one else has a better idea), so it will automatically push towards it 50 blocks every round until destroyed. Also, SOPA's anti-advertising provision removes all ads, so spambots and other advertising-based attacks automatically fail until it is destroyed. 50/50 on whether the failsafes stopping it from attacking me work (random.org each time it would interfere with me)
Meanwhile, I attempt to get Pricey to ally with me for some much-needed allies in my quest, then attack the more damaged Alpha Phantom by inventing a new trick with my endergy arm (which is still actually there, despite the lack of reason): I use it to make some TNT intangible, light it, phase my endergy arm inside the phantom with the TNT on the end of it, and then make it tangible and teleport away right before it explodes, tele-fragging the Phantom with explosives.
SOPATank [H]: 50000/50000 HP (takes 50% damage from entities)(automatically reduces distance to Yggdrasil by 50 blocks per turn)
Edit: No, editing after the fact does not stop the SOPATank from taking effect. You know you called it the SOPATank, you cannot just edit it back to the SOAPTank and claim nothing happened.
That was a mistake, but you know what, we'll roll with it. SOPA tank added! UserZero convinces the tank back to her side with her free Health Insurance plan (and yes, Tanks can have health insurance) supplied by Godmodding Incorporated! The buffs are too strong for an instant action, so it merely gains an extra +5000 HP current and max.
Shenelsky creates a golem from the vortex mixture to +1 K4yne and TheDrivingLlama. The golem then searches for these items: 1 Popcorn 2 Rocks 1 Sharp Rock 1 Demon Blood Shard 9 Iron 9 Copper 1 Raspberry Pi 43,046,721 Cobblestone 1 of any book 2 Empty Taglock Kits 1 Mirror 1 of any Gem Artifact 4 Walls 1 Infusion Matrix 1 Bottle of Ender Air
With some research, I might just be able to… It seems pretty obvious what is going to happen here.
Power emanates from inscribed text.
The Inscription: 7/15 (+1 from TheDrivingLlama and +1 from K4yne)
Regretful pasts…
3/10 Memoric Book
You find everything except the Popcorn; it appears UserZero has literally oblitherated every last Popcorn kernal on the server...But it gestures to Richard, implying he might have saved some.
I smirk. "Fire? You think FIRE would harm a WATER god?"
I wave a hand, and the fires are extinguished by a sudden rain. I also encase a random Alpha Phantom in a sphere of pure void. Every time it tries to escape, the void will consume part of it. Sadly, I can only hold it together 1 turn.
5/25 Thunderstorm
6/25 Guardian King
Fire doused! The plains turn back to normal.
The 1st Alpha Phantom is trapped by your Void sphere! It'll take damage when it does an action in the EoTB and won't be able to do it properly.
I, having no knowledge of the future, join the Pro-Zero side.
I dash towards the Lesser Earth Emental at hypersonic speeds. I use my momentum to strike the Elemental with enough force to pierce through a titanium wall, shattering my arm. I dig my heels into the ground in an attempt to stop myself, but a stray foot trips me, sending me tumbling into a tree.
6,000 + 1,500 damage to the Lesser Earth Elemental! (The + 1,500 is the -25% defense kicking in, giving you an extra quarter of damage).
Whoops. Massive embarrassment. Didn't realize I had already posted twice.
IRL, I play the superior instrument (the trumpet). Therefore, I whack the Tuba with a trumpet.
Also,
Bemused, I ask,
"Was that supposed to be an insult of some sort?"
Shaking my head, I state,
"Listen. I have faced horrors with more power than you could ever imagine. I have been tortured, lost limbs, and suffered possession. I do not feel any need for your approval. Honestly, the fact that you are disappointed in me now is wonderful. It shows that I am still human when I cannot take along my weapons."
9/20 Maine Cannon (+1 from Piono)
7/25 Elizabeth
After about three months of waiting, a black shape begins to form. It looks like a goat with one head on each end of its body.
The tuba was destroyed last turn!
UserZero: i should elaborate. UserZero: i am dissapointed in you. UserZero: specifically, i am dissapointed in you for not thinking of moving half of an inch away after doing that attack.
She proceeds to knock you right into the sky with a hammer roughly the size of a small city.
(...I'd rather not make everything be charge-based again. That'd be entirely uncreative to just have everything significant be due to charges. So, do you have any suggestions on how I could make a level-up system work?)
Yay! Walker managed to kill something!
...Not that this means anything yet because I haven't figured out how to get a leveling up system into the game yet.
"SON OF A GORILLA. THAT DIDN'T DO GORILLA TO REGAIN MY ABILITY TO DO FAR TOO MANY THINGS AT ONCE."
Alpha Phantom 3: 5/5
Beta Phantom 2: 1/10
+2 to Fseftr
Current entities and moves this turn:
Walker: After figuring out some ways to mix up the basic attacks, Slash the Lesser Earth Elemental and hope that an Alchemiter is discovered soon
Alpha Phantom 1: Anti-Auda the Virus
Alpha Phantom 2, if still alive: Attack the Seaweed and get some health back
Alpha Phantom 3: You just came onto the field, go recover from summoning sickness or something otherwise bad things might happen
Beta Phantom 1: Attack the Lesser Earth Elemental, I wanna see how much damage you can do
1,000 + 250 damage to the Lesser Earth Elemental! Your entities will do as you say.
Your third summoned Alpha Phantom is attacked by the Curse of Repetetiveness, and cannot use Anti-Auda and has less HP! I told you that you shouldn't spam charges, though it was effective at getting PZ Bodies out there...
I set a comfy chair somewhere safe and sit in it and began to eat popcorn while watching the battle.
I also decide to combine a Pipebomb with a Assault Rifle.
3/25 (Mobile Base)
3/25 (Project "Revelation")
Dark forces emit around you as you make your despicable chant to summon one of the most fowl of Dream Demons! The world goes monochrome, you start chanting something without your knowing, and...
...A Freddy Head appears. Eyes and all. You are about to dismiss it when it starts talking, like a text-to-speech program was used to make it speak:
Bill Cipher: HEY THERE! YOU'VE REACHED THE ANSWERING MACHINE OF BILL CIPHER, DREAM DEMON! IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR BUSINESS CARDS, DON'T BOTHER. I HAND THOSE OUT ON WEDNESDAYS. IF YOU'RE HERE FOR THE LOCAL BARBEQUE, YOU'VE MISSED THAT! IT WAS YESTERDAY! WE'LL BE HAVING SOME LEFTOVERS TOMORROW NIGHT, THOUGH! HUMAN LEGS AND MUTATED EYEBALLS! DELICIOUS! IF YOU'RE HEARING THIS, THEN I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW! MAYBE I'M AWAY ON A DEAL WITH SOMEONE ELSE, OR MAYBE I'M BUSY LOOKING DOWN ON YOUR MORTAL REALM WITH MY NEARLY OMNISCIENT DREAM BUBBLE! WHATEVER I'M DOING RIGHT NOW, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOU! IN FACT, NO ONE DOES! THAT'S PROBABLY WHY YOU'VE STOOPED SO LOW THAT YOU'RE MAKING A LITERAL DEAL WITH THE DEVIL! LATER, SUCKER!
I take one piece of popcorn and store it well out of UserZeros' sight. I take another and lob it in her face
Sword 3/5.
UserZero plants her axe into the ground! It creates a huge fissure, and massive eruption of blood-red light erputs from it, destroying both pieces of popcorn AND sending you sky-high!
m>Allegiance Meter v.002 ────────────Richard─────Autonomous─UserZero─❪IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII❫ 000010────────────000001────────────000002 076.92%───────────007.69%───────────015.38% Allegiance meter in effect.
Alchemies
SCP-876 && Gold Banded Greatwood Wand = SCP-4822-DTG - Wands of the Element-Bender (1/?)
Iter Glass Phial1 && Right Femur = Bone of the Traveler (1/?)
1Iter Glass Phial: A glass phial containing eight Iter essentia. Iter is the aspect of "travel, journey".
Charges
Project M03-ぼくらの16bit戦争 bokura no 16bit warz (5/15) (+1 from TwinBuilder, Irecreeper)
Project M02-魔域傲世六階 móyù àoshì lìujiē (12/25)
+1 to TwinBuilder, +1 to Irecreeper
Entity Command
Virus.DOS.SSR-II will attack the Lesser Earth Elemental in REVENGE! If the Lesser Earth Elemental is dead, it will instead attack the Beta Phantom; if that is dead, it will attack the Alpha Phantom; if that is dead, then it will attack the SOAPTank/SOPATank.
Action
I grab a massive plutonium launcher and launch rocks of plutonium at the Beta Phantom.
2,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
SCP-876 && Gold Banded Greatwood Wand = SCP-4822-DTG - Wands of the Element-Bender (Level 3: 1/4)
Iter Glass Phial1 && Right Femur = Bone of the Traveler (Level 2: 1/3)
Golem: You can't actually prove my intent with a single data point, but I'll let that slide since I don't care enough to keep arguing the point.
Golem: Let's try something else.
I pull out a can, and hit UserZero in the face with it. I then throw another can at the Beta Phantom. The can I threw at the Beta Phantom is made of pure distilled Magic Cueball. The can I threw at UserZero is just a normal can. I then notice sigmatw both attempting to summon Bill and failing horribly at it.
Golem: No. Hell no. Hell GORILLAing no, you're not summoning him.
I proceed to clap my hands lightly, and put out all the candles used in the summoning circle.
Golem: Also you didn't even get the second part right. It's "Message Backwards" backwards. Seriously, do your research.
UserZero grabs the perfectly normal can and throws it at you instead! 4,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
UserZero immediately create's the Blood Moon to complement Vein Matters, as you were so kind to give her a recipie! She does so via console commands, as she's the server admin and all that.
I stare a random Alpha Phantom, searching the depths of my inventory for something of value for aggrievement. That might actually work. Hah. As such, I proceed to draw a singular card from my inventory, the Ace of Spades. I shake it somewhat, and suddenly I am holding a cast iron horse hitcher in my hands. I wave the hitcher in a manner akin to a stave, and an aura of shadow magic surrounds the thing. I direct the head of the thing to face the Alpha Phantom, accruing energy.
Within instants, the horse hitcher's iron eyes are glimmering with a deep purple. I proceed to slam the hitcher's bottom into the ground, before directing it at the Phantom, raising it once more. Plumes of shadow magic erupt from the top of the hitcher, forming a blast of shadowy flames, all directed toward the Alpha Phantom. I quickly divert the essence pervading the actual plane of the server itself, instead forcing the stuff to imbed itself in the Phantom. With precise, calculated movements, the shadows burst out of points in the Phantom, once more set to the air. This time, however, the sorceries seem to have an actual effect on the general atmosphere. The air chills around the Phantom and I, some temperature below what could ordinarily be determined as the freezing point. The writhing flame-appearing objects of pure shadow begin to flail madly, dealing as much structural damage to the Alpha Phantom as possible, tearing holes and instilling bodily chaos where possible. With a thought, tendrils of the shadow-resembling-flame leap up, and restrain the thing.
Satisfied somewhat with my work, I stride over to the Phantom, forcibly giving the thing temporary physicality with my mind, if need be. I raise the horse hitcher, and bash the Phantom in the most painful place possible, or the most efficient place, if the creature cannot actually perceive pain. The esoteric shadow magic of the hitcher digs into the Phantom, far more effective than the physical blow could ever dream to be. Arcane forces gather around the impact point, an extent of my will. This will be rather simple. The Phantom is darkened, its form slightly fading. It seems almost as if this force were removing it from reality. One believing that would be mainly correct. With another calculated strike of the hitcher, the Phantom is afflicted once more by the immense dangers of the sorcerous darkness, the magic itself corroding the place of impact upon the Phantom. With a repeated flick of my wrist, I spin the hitcher around in my hand multiple times, before striking the Phantom once more. I shift the hitcher somewhat, and it suddenly disappears. I place the Ace of Spades back in my deck, instead opting for the Eight of Spades, and the Ace of Diamonds.
I immediately transform the Ace of Diamonds into its innocuous double, the Ultra-Violence Cuestick. This will certainly work as a channel for the arcane better than a cast iron horse hitcher. Hah. With a wave of the cuestick, a blast of pure energy tears through the air, piercing the Phantom in its stomach/stomach analogue. Upon contact, the burst is transformed into a large amount of impure rust, hopefully weighing the now-certainly-physical creature down. I twist the Cuestick somewhat, waves of octarine serving only to further denote my mastery over the recondite.
A bolt of octarine erupts from the tip of the Ultra-Violence Cuestick, shockwaves emanating from the fabric of reality itself as I use the very gravitation of the server to tear the Alpha Phantom apart. Knowing that it would not proceed fully without incurring actual death, something I cannot yet manage, I promptly lessen the telekinetic strain to something manageable without thought, yet still excessively painful and inconvenient for the target. The bolt of octarine streaks through space, pummeling the Phantom, and fully severing the formerly-restraining tendrils of shadow from the ground. The second the bolt strikes, a blinding flash of octarine pulses throughout the area. I separate the bolt into strands of almost electric sorcery, squinting somewhat from the flash as the bolts of octarine leap across the Phantom's form. Mysterious energies surge about within the Phantom, rendering it completely immobile.
Upon noting the Phantom's paralysis, I release a flurry of octarine blasts, each catching the Phantom with unnerving precision. The resulting explosions drag pure vis out of the aura, and use it to further damage the Phantom. With an off-handed gesticulation, a block of dirt is disconnected from the ground, and floats over to the phantom, via the medium of psychics. The cube of dirt and grass rests atop the immobile Phantom, before it merely liquifies. With a mere twitch from the Ultra-Violence Cuestick, vast amounts of purification ordinarily seen in Vis Filters wrought of silverwood treat the goo, and it transforms into liquid essentia.
As you very well know, liquid essentia and open air do not typically mix.
The Terra essentia hisses and froths, irreparably damaging whatever external surface of the solid phantom exists. Within moments, the arcane fluid has fused with the aforementioned surface, still hissing. I back off, running around twenty meters away, and donning Goggles of Revealing. The essentia, by this point, is literally part of the Alpha Phantom at this point, the fusion of the liquid and the external bodily layer having occurred without a hitch. While this is already painful, it should also be of note that the essentia, despite being mere drab and unassuming Terra, has literally dissolved and melted the external layer of existential matter beneath it away, slowly and painfully. If the Phantom can scream, it is certainly doing that now. Then, there is a violent, shaking explosion. With my goggles, I can fully see the vis and essentia emanations, ingraining them in my mind for later use. When the smoke and vacillating primal colors fade away, the Phantom is still living by a thread. I saunter over to the thing, carefully stepping over the newly-formed deposits of crystalline Herba and Terra essentia I meet in the small crater. I raise the Ultra-Violence Cuestick toward the creature somewhat.
I proceed to decapitate whatever semblance of a head or top section of a body the thing had left with a double-edged sword. The thing, of which I am nearly certain is dead, collapses to the ground regardless, my hold on its physicality dissolving, and with it, its actual physical state. Of course, I had quickly slipped the Ace of Diamonds back into my deck, and utilized the Eight of Spades (the double-edged sword) to decapitate it, all within the space of a second. Hah. I place the Eight of Spades back in my deck.
Alchemization time, I suppose. The nostalgia is wondrous. As was usual in DTG2, just ask if you don't know what I'm talking about here, and I'll give you a wordy explanation of what each item is.
I try to figure out how the Alchemiter went back in time, then give up that line of thought. I then attempt to see what happens if I alchemize Richard with a Tuba (does he commit suicide or not?) using the Preview-Matic I pulled out of nowhere (also, I forget to take it back when done with it and leave it attached to the Alchemiter so everyone can use it). I then test the result by pulling out a Tuba and smashing Richard over the head with it until Richard merges with the Tuba (Curse of Repetitiveness does not apply, because if it did UserZero's use of the Tuba here would have made every other attack on the godmodder using a Tuba (the first attack in DTG1, and more importantly the fourth Trial where Psi-Scratch trapped him in a Tuba) invalid, and we know that since those attacks worked that tubas are somehow able to bypass the curse of repetititiveness). Also, I +2 Pricey if he starts any charges yet.
You can't Alchemize with Richard, and even if you could, that would just make /////////////////////////////////////////////////////! Richard just leaps away as you attempt to bash him, terrified beyond belief, before he finally musters the courage to make the Tuba explode in your face.
UserZero's attack pummels atomicAmiable until she falls to the ground, unconscious and bleeding slightly. Luckily, it's only an avatar.
Meanwhile, in another universe at a circumstantially simultaneous point of reference, an eldritch wave of power subdues the person manipulating the avatar and forces her into the throes of unconsciousness. And back on Minecraftia, the prone atomicAmiable's spiral cheeks flicker from white to black.
antimatterAugury has joined the server.
AA: Hmmm.
AA: It seems someone in this reAlity wAs so kind As to Wake me up.
AA: Excellent.
AA: My meddling sister will no longer get in the wAy.
AA: Elf, Although I do know it wAs you who did the tAsk of AwAking me...
AA: I'm AfrAid the Aid you enjoyed under my sister is no more.
AA: No, I hAve other objectives.
AA: UserZero.
AA: I work for the good of All things I cAre About.
AA: I will let nothing stAnd in my wAy.
AA: So I Am here to help you.
AA: We Are going to kill a tubA boy.
antimatterAugury has joined the PZs. He immediately holds out his hand and summons a fortune teller who claims they can predict one's future. Richard is intrigued if he will ever beat UserZero and sits down for an extensive talk with the fortune teller, only to realize that the fortune teller's tent is sealed off by eight-mile-thick bedrock barriers in all directions (including vertically), a passive field that negates teleportation, flashstepping, any transport abilities, and also disables godmodding benefits, unbreakable turrets filled with anti-Gamma Godmodder missiles, and also apparently the fortune teller breathes poison for some reason. Richard briefly wonders how all this randomly materialized around him before realizing that it was probably conjured by AA and reasons that he can just as easily un-conjure it if he simply stays out of the way of the anti-godmod field. He searches the tent for one spot where the field is weaker until finally he finds a corner where he should be able to do it. The fortune-teller's poison is growing closer and crowding him in, but eventually, he manages to completely erase the tent of horrors from existence.
That's the part when he realizes that the tent had also been teleported into the middle of the Void in the process. The Inter-Universal Void, not the one between the Overworld and Nether. He promptly chokes to death.
Duality: 8/25.
Alchemizing Stardust Dragon Staff && Special Stardust. Result: Special Stardust Dragon Staff (1/?).
Description: A staff that summons dragons infused with Special Stardust, the magical material that is part of a healthy breakfast. Clearly something went very wrong at the lab.
Richard manages to use Console Commands to teleport himself back to the battlefield in the nick of time!
Stardust Dragon Staff && Special Stardust. Result: Special Stardust Dragon Staff (Level 0: 1/1).
Sigmatw you fool! You've doomed us all!
ohnonononononononotbill
Does anyone here have any unicorn hair? Most likely not…
Well, now that we have the alchemiter, I may just be able to make this, 9 Iron && 9 Copper = 18 Ferropper Ingots 1/? Gem Artifact && Mirror = Bane of Lapis 1/? Shenelsky discards the first 3 walls, and carves two symbols into the rocks with the sharp rock. The runes are the same as the ones in his hands. He also takes a taglock of Richard and another as UserZero
Glowing text.
The Inscription: 8/15
BILLBILLBILLBILLBILLCYETHETRIANGLEGUY
4/10 Memoric Book
Inventory: 1 Popcorn 2 Rune Rocks 1 Demon Blood Shard 1 Raspberry Pi 43,046,721 Cobblestone 1 of any book 1 UserZero taglock 1 Richard taglock 4th Wall 1 Infusion Matrix 1 Bottle of Ender Air
You attempt to get a taglock of UserZero, which is basically a blood sample, only to realize that she does not have blood. The taglock penetrates her clothing in such a manner as to suggest UserZero, skin and all, is literally a walking blob of goo, goo that you suck into the Taglock. It quickly breaks out and tries to strangle you before returning to the whole mass, while UserZero madly cackles.
Richard just kicks you away when you try to get his blood sample. He's not just giving his blood away to anyone
I run over to the Veteran, wave, then offer a piece of candy corn, which contrary to popular belief, is not a plot device.
AC: "Hello old friend." I say with a slight smile.
AC: "It's nice to see someone from the Old War." I say, as I slowly walk off toward an Alpha Phantom...
I then...
IF ALPHA PHANTOM 2 IS ALIVE:
I snipe the Healing Seeweed if that's alive, so that it can't get the sweet heals. I then proceed to whip out a Candy Corn Rifle and fire a quick burst at the Alpha Phantom. As the Alpha Phantom takes light damage from the barrage, I step in, jab my ring of keys into its eyes, then switch it to a Tommy Gun while it's stuck deep inside it's eye. I then attempt to remove the gun, but it's deeply stuck! Then, fearing the worst, I call 911, summoning an ambulance to the field!
I then play innocent, pretending that I didn't shove the key/gun into its eye. The doctors take the injured phantom into the ambulance, and are forced to make a quick decision. They then decide that the best course of action would be to perform a quick surgery. And who would they put to the task you ask? Why, Nigel Burke of course!
He, and his hard-to-control hand end up shoving the gun deeper into his eye! As he attempts to grab some painkillers to dampen the pain, he accidentally activates the medical laser, sending a laser across the Phantom! Deep wounds and burns are created by the beam, causing Nigel to panic! He then quickly resorts to flailing a hammer around, smashing the laser out of the way! He then attempts to smash the gun out of the eye with the hammer, but he ends up nailing the gun deeper in!
Nigel, knowing it in his heart that he can't do this, calls in a close friend; the Medic from Team Fortress 2! Upon seeing the Phantom, he notices that he lacks a heart capable of Uber! To remedy this, he quickly pulls out his bonesaw, and rips his/her/it's ribcage open! He then quickly breaks a few ribs, and removes the heart quickly and swiftly! He then proceeds to pull an item out of his inventory; the container with the Uber Heart! He opens it up, and prepares to insert it...
...but as he brings the heart closer to the phantom, it explodes! The Medic quickly shoves the Phantom's old heart back into the host body, and closes up the ribcage! As the Medic prides himself for a job well(?) done, a Spy appears behind him, and kills him instantly! The Spy, mistaking the Phantom as an ally of the Medic, begins butter-knifing the poor phantom! He then scores six critical ambassador head-shots on the poor guy. As the Phantom is surely in it's death throes, I then run in with the Armistyx in Eyelander Scythe Mode, and taunt-kill the ambulance. It explodes in a blaze of glory, killing everyone inside and somehow not injuring me. I then loot my ring of keys from the carnage.
IF ALPHA PHANTOM 2 IS DEAD:
Then this somewhat gory attack will target the other Alpha Phantom!
I then: Old Armistyx && Candy Corn = ???
You don't destroy the Healing Seaweed as that would make this attack, very technically, splash damage! 13,000 damage to the 2nd Alpha Phantom, which kicks it as a result!
The Twin-Linked Bolter combines the functionality of two Boltguns into one, allowing more shots per turn overall.
While the Alchemiter does its thing, Bomber channels his energy once more. A small flash occurs and the three rings of spell runes appear around him once more. He scrolls along the top ring before finding a certain symbol that caught his eye. This one was an image of a small sphere with swirls of air flowing into it. He couldn't help but grin as he noticed there was a big sudsy (or was it Internet-restricting?) tank just asking to be destroyed from the inside-out. Bomber pressed the rune, his fingertips glowing a deep violet color afterward. The rings around him dissipate, fading embers being the only thing that remained of it for the time being. He began to wave his arms from side to side, his hand leaving inky trails behind them as they flowed through the air. Suddenly, Bomber thrust a clawed hand forward, firing a small dark sphere from his palm toward the SOAP(SOPA?)Tank. The incorporeal orb would pass through any solid object, including the SOAP(SOPA?)Tank. With impeccable timing, Bomber stopped the sphere as it passed right inside of the tank.
"Gravity holds things together, but it can also tear things apart."
Grinning wickedly, Bomber snapped his fingers. There was a horribly loud humming noise coming from within the tank as its frame began to shudder. The SOAP(SOPA?)Tank made a horrible rattling noise as it suddenly began to bulge inwards. The dark sphere had become a small gravity well, pulling things in a small area toward it. Since the SOAP(SOPA?)Tank was right on top of it, the forces of gravity acting upon it began to crush the vehicle, tearing it apart from within. There was a terribly loud groaning noise as steel and iron tore apart and collided as the tank collapsed in on itself. The gravity well also tore up some grass, dirt, and stone blocks near it, pulling them into its embrace. Eventually, the gravity well dissipated, (hopefully) leaving behind a pile of tank scrap and other rubble it managed to tear up.
I glance at the Alpha Phantom which I did not accost last post (or alternatively the Beta Phantom if that is dead; if this is the case, replace every 'Alpha' in this post with 'Beta'), and proceed to smash it into the ground with the weight of my psionic mind, flashstepping around twenty meters before the being. Upon doing so, I draw a wand wrought of silverwood and capped with the finest voidmetal from my inventory, affixing a focus to the top. I grip the wand in my left hand, readying the other for what appears to be nothing. I mutter something under my breath, and flick the wand a second later. A massive pulsating orb of primal energies bursts from the focus, veering off in a random direction variating to an absurd level from the course I had desired. I sigh, and my open hand glows with psionic energy.
Instantaneously, the orb arcs back on track, slamming directly into the Phantom, and bursting into primal vis, searing into the Phantom and the area around it alike, a blind, uncaring chaos. I peer at the area through my Goggles of Revealing, scrutinizing it heavily. Unfortunately, I cannot seem to find what I am looking for. This is both a disappointment and a benefit. I flick my wrist, and another orb of primal vis bombards the Phantom, a burst of pure magic annihilating some portion of its form murderously and without hesitation. I utilize any shock or emotion from the Phantom's end to further my advantage, dragging the entity into the ground further. Yet again, nothing seems to have changed in the auric field from when I last generated a primal orb, despite the crater of moderate size around the Phantom.
I calmly fire another primal orb at the Phantom. The thing soars skyward, and then backward, following whatever absurd lack of logic commands it. The thing glows with a dull gray aura, and I force the thing back on course. In fact, I just telekinetically pummel the Phantom with the orb, carefully examining the process all the while. I am pleasantly surprised to find that oh wait it's a hungry node as well. I swiftly drop my wand into my inventory, and wave my left arm, glowing with a gray aura. The Phantom is dragged forwards, and left in suspended animation directly before the impact site of the final orb. This will be a challenge. The Phantom is being pulled back somewhat by a seemingly unknown force centered at the impact block.
I remove my goggles, and levitate some distance into the air to face the Phantom directly, flashing with an aura of gray and occasionally irrigo. My eyes turn a dark shade of teal, for whatever reason, and bolts of teal and gray electricity spark off of my sclera, flashing rapidly. I contain the power for as long as possible, soon shuddering with psychic strain. Within mere instants, my eyes erupt with twin optic blasts of the teal variety, streaking in the Phantom's direction at speeds by far exceeding that of sound. The optic blasts tear into the Phantom effortlessly, rending flesh, blood, or any other tissues, my mind solidifying this creature as well beforehand, if necessary.
Teal obscures the vision of any looking in my direction from within fifty meters. The blasts inexorably rend sizable holes in the Alpha Phantom. That is an understatement. Essentially, if this entity was in any way humanoid or of human size, it has likely been consumed by the blast in its entirety. As the energy discharges its force into the Phantom, I allow my mind to drift to places not altogether whole. While I may not possess the innate receptiveness to the Outer Gods of some amethyst mages, I can certainly utilize the forces of the Furthest Ring and the Void for my own purposes. Suddenly, hundreds of thousands of squamous, damp tentacles squeeze between the small gaps in this plane to meet our own, diving toward the Phantom unnaturally swiftly. The innumerable limbs of seemingly non-Euclidean construct in some areas are obscured by the intensity of my optic blasts, though not consumed. If all sound was not currently being obfuscated by a deafening blaze of psychic fury, one would hear the wet tearing of whatever it is Alpha Phantoms are composed of, and the occasional movement of a tentacle.
Of course, all of this has occurred with the span of twenty seconds. I let out a small, stifled scream as the psychic stress overcomes me, and I abruptly fall out of the sky, smashing into the ground twenty meters below. The optic blasts instantly cease, to reveal a hunk of something, completely obscured by the mass of tentacles tearing it apart fully. Lying upon the ground, I mutter something weakly, and make an occult gesture lost to the mists of time. Nothing seems to occur, but I know that within the practical cocoon of tentacles, the remnants of the Phantom are being spatially warped beyond belief as they are assaulted by an ungodly amount of curses and sorcery.
Slowly, the tentacles curl away, slipping back through their initial places of ingress, leaving a mass of mutilated matter of some description behind. It begins to sail to the ground, but is caught up by the Hungry Node, and consumed, leaving behind no remains in any way whatsoever. Adieu, Alpha Phantom. You will probably not be missed, despite your gruesome execution, due to the fact that you will likely be replaced almost immediately. I rise from my position on the ground just as the Hungry Node smooths out, and fades back into Nihil Parva, emitting a deafening crack and a whoorp noise. Evidently, I am not powerful enough to create nodes of any description. Whatever. I could probably get someone to do it for me.
I give a sideways glance to antimatterAugury afterward.
TA: I don't really think it is a good idea to make assumptions about who I am, ye of the positron. Or possibly antiproton. Antineutron? You seem more like the first, honestly.
TA: Given how cherubs tend to act, I expected the withdraw of aid. I wanted to see who would emerge. It would probably be unusually easy to drag you to the depths of unconsciousness to replace your sister, but your brain is just too fascinating! Haha.
Incidentally, Sigmatw, Shenelsky has a right to be scared. Your mind is not nearly as safe as you think it is.
Void Aspected Silverwood Wand && Crystalline Auram Essentia (2/???)
Vial of Ink && Node in a Jar (2/???)
15,000 damage to the 3rd Alpha Phantom! That thing is very much un-alived! Well, is it really alive in the first place being a ghost-oh who even cares.
Noticing the 2 summoning circles, i pomptly decide to ruin UserZero's by summoning a MK3 Adware-Spam Type-B12-bot to distract her
Hp: 100
Upon death, Mind control, or being shutdown, UserZero's summoning is disrupthed.
Takes 100.1 damage upon summon.
i then attack UserZero with Octaslash, using a... sword made of popcorn machines?
In the mean while, a bipedal sponge at the buttom of the sea walks by, accidentlly tripping whilst carrying a Legendary Recipe.
4/9 Factory(1+ from missed, 1+ from piono)
3/10 Spell book (missed 1+)
2+ to Richard's summoning
The Spambot does absolutely nothing! The Summoning Circle needs no further attention drawn to it! It is then promptly erased from existence, effect included. Your sword is suddenly evaporated by a massive beam of godmodding energy before it even gets close to her! She really must hate Popcorn Machines.
Richard can't accept the +2, the summoing needs no further attention drawn to it!
>Allegiance Meter v.002 ────────────Richard─────Autonomous─UserZero─❪IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII❫ 000012────────────000001────────────000002 080.00%───────────006.67%───────────013.33% Allegiance meter in effect.
Walker, unsure what to do, eventually has an idea. He heads over to Userzero.
"...UH... MISS USERZERO... I HATE TO BE A BOTHER, BUT... FOR SOME REASON, I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET MY FULL POWER LEVEL BACK. UH... IF YOU'RE ANY GOOD WITH MACHINES... THEN... COULD YOU HELP ME OUT WITH THIS? UH, PLEASE. IT'S EMBARRASSING, NOT BEING ABLE TO DO THINGS..."
Note that this is probably the first time he's spoken to someone in a way that doesn't involve many bold gorillas. Also, he's averting his eyes from her slightly.
UserZero: hrm, yeah, this needs to be solved, a bit.
UserZero: let me think here for a second-ohwait, yeah, I have that!
UserZero: yes, I think I can fix this little issue, immediately even!
UserZero proceeds to quickly shove an odd chip in the back of your head. It's activation quickly makes your head spin for a second, but after that is done, you instantly realize up to 909 Trillion different variations on the Basic Attack, allowing you to fight on-par with the others!
UserZero: yessss! An omega-class combat chip, that is. courtesy of yours truly!
UserZero: should update that basic attack routine to be WAY more flexible, manipulate the narrative or conflict or whatever it is, it's one of them, but it doesn't really matter!
UserZero: other effects can kick in after a while, but that should be immediately realizable!
I shoot my Crusader's Crossbow at the Lesser Earth Elemental and follow up with a booster shot from the Quick-Fix. The Lesser Earth Elemental is healed for less than if it had been straight, but regenerates for the next 2 turns.
+1,000 HP and 1,000 HP Regen for the next two turns for the Lesser Earth Elemental.
Full Restore AND Enchanted Bow = Crusader's Crossbow M 2/?
___
Kanto Starters (One entity)
Special: Evolution (Start with stats of 12 post summon, increase to stats of 16 post summon after first update, and increase to stats of 20 post summon after second update.)
Johto Starters (Still one entity)
Special: Evolution (Start with stats of 12 post summon, increase to stats of 16 post summon after first update, and increase to stats of 20 post summon after second update.)
___
Mercury commands the starters to attack the Earth Elemental, and also personally shoots a bow at it.
Kanto and Johto starters summoned! They will do as you say. 1,500 + 325 damage to the Lesser Earth Elemental!
Leather Braced Handle && Iron Hammer Head == Iron Forge Hammer 1/?(I can name these right?)
Orb of Fire && Orb of Light == Holy Flame 1/?
Slime Lore 5:
Great, the slime's about to die, time to finish this up
So the human (who is revealed to name himself "The Shredder") meets the warriors on the battlefield. He pulls out a bow that was guarded the green slimes. Knowing every green slime was probably destroyed, the Green slime leader runs at the shredder and is instantly shot down. The red slime leader tells Urthank to get a blade deep within there base while he holds him off. He grabs the blade and is met against the shredder who has shredded every last slime except him...
Urthank: 'You shall die today, for this blade shall be your doom'
The Shredder: 'Bold words for a slime...'
They begin the duel, the shredder attacks with a flurry of attacks but Urthank defends them, and when he finds a clear shot he takes it, wounding the Shredder
The Shredder: 'Great, I'm dead'
The slime is amazed when he appears across the field charging at him
The Shredder: 'Respawns are awesome arn't they?'
Urthank braces for another attack when he is summoned by me...
____________
Finally, the summon will strike fear into the eyes of.. oh wait, he's nearly dead already... BY ZERO
I finally use my slime, with it's anger stored up to launch an attack on Zero. I take out the slime and I approach Zero. I challenge her to a duel, take out my sword and fight against her. However, even though she's a better swordsman, I launch her with a solid punch making her land right into the path of a semi truck... Being piloted by the slime...
Leather Braced Handle && Iron Hammer Head == Iron Forge Hammer (Level 2, 1/3)
Orb of Fire && Orb of Light == Holy Flame (Level 3, 1/4)
I gather as many CALZONES as I can find, and proceed to add spices to them. I keep adding spices. They are now "EXTRA SPICE SPICEY CALZONES", which I throw at the Beta Phantom, and they spontaneously combust on impact!!
The Nearly Incomplete Certainly Extremely Memey with Extra Meme Explosives (Or NICEMEME, for short) 3/20
I BURN the SOAPTank, muhahahahahaha! BURN! BUUUUUUURN!
gorrilaing mangos: 10/10 (+2 from Irecreeper)
The Mango Monster has been summoned!
Mango Monster [AZ]: HP:50,000/50,000 Now, I can explain the health, as this entity only deals 1 damage, and heals one ally for around 6,000 health per turn.
I begin a new charge. Quote: 3/25 (+2 from TakenForGranted)
I pull out my Rifle then i blast the Alpha Phantom with it. Eat gorilla stupid phantom
??? 1/50
Elite Swordmaster 1/30
+1 Twin +1 Talist
I like to use Boldy text for Summons and Attacks like this, I also use Bold and Courier New for Gorilla words like this. gorilla Not gorilla, (Because this is Basic) or gorilla. (Not using Courier New)
(9 / 20) A Construction (+2 total from Jon, Cobalt)
(10 / 10) Identity Crisis -> Summoning...
+1 to Jon
+1 to Cobalt
=Summon=
A small jukebox descends from above, coupled with a parachute. It lands on the Battlefield, then starts blaring music.
"YOU'RE A KID NOW YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID NOWWWWWW"
Suddenly, some of the battlefield is carpeted with Ink, as two figures super-jump onto the battlefield!
[AZ] Inkling (Splattershot)
HP: 20,000
Attacks:
Ink Burst: Fires a small salvo of orange ink. Deals light damage to two entities. Adds 1 stack of Ink to each target.
Burst Bomb: Causes a small ink explosion, dealing moderate damage to one entity. Adds 1-2 stacks of Ink.
Bomb Rush: Uses Burst Bomb three times in a row. Cannot hit a target multiple times. 3 Turn Charge.
Passive:
Ink: If an entity obtains 5 stacks of ink, they explode in an inky burst, taking high damage! Upon exploding, Ink stacks drop to 0.
[AZ] Inkling (Splat Charger)
HP: 20,000
Attacks:
Charge Shot: Charges up a powerful shot! Deals high damage, but takes a turn to fire. (akin to Pokemon's Solar Beam) Adds 3 stacks of Ink to the target.
Splat Bomb: Summons a 3,000 HP Splat Bomb! The bomb explodes one turn after summoning if not killed, dealing high damage to two random entities. Hit targets obtain 2 stacks of ink.
Bomb Rush: Uses Splat Bomb three times in a row. 3 Turn Charge.
Passive:
Ink: If an entity obtains 5 stacks of ink, they explode in an inky burst, taking high damage! Upon exploding, Ink stacks drop to 0.
=Action=
I then equip both Inklings with Fireproof armor, to negate / minimize damage from the terrain. The armor is created from finest dragon scales, improved with the finest in candy-armor technology.
The Inkling with the Splattershot will use Burst Bomb on the Beta Phantom, while the Inkling with the Splat Charger will use Splat Bomb.
You fireproof the duo, despite there being no fire anymore!
While waiting for that, he proceeds to shoot the SOAPtank (or a phantom if it's dead) with a Deja Vu gun. While waiting for that, he proceeds to shoot the SOAPtank (or a phantom if it's dead) with a Deja Vu gun.
I take out a pretzel, then pull out Pricey's vocal cords and use them to top the pretzel. Since UserZero's favorite food is pretzels and her favorite pretzel topping is vocal cords, she is incredibly desperate to get it. I then order her to go on a quest for it, but she's too smart for that and knows that it would be entirely too long, annoying, contradictory and possibly even damaging. I'm proud of her genre savviness, so I offer to give it to her if she just punches herself as far back and as damagingly as possible. If she attacks me, I just burn the pretzel to ashes.
((OK I think I get it, but about the alchemies, do I have to somehow get it earlier or just get it magically now))
Weather Golems: 1/10
I create a simple wooden sword, ProZero people laugh. I then hit them and it launches them into the sky, (as it had the enchantment fast.high.levitation but dealing no damage. when they come back down it does though
HA! THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I'VE DAMAGED THE GODMODDER! And it was with a stupid reference to Corner Gas... huh...
Game play question... Do charges have to be used up all at once? I was thinking of making two parallel 50 post charges. One summons an entity and whenever it attacks it uses up 5 posts worth of charge from the other 50 post charge. Also, you can't make entities stronger than 50 posts worth of stuff, but can you heal them with charges? Seems like you should be able to. Also, could we please NOT have a duplicator? The duplicator made potions really useless. Maybe give them two or three charges instead.
I finish my first summon! Ticker tape parade! With a massive 5/5 post charge, I get out a LOT of balloons and start tying them together in what looks like the shape of a small dragon. I summon the BALLOON WHELP! Let's start off nice and simple. ... Simple for me anyway.
[AZ] HP: 1,000,000/1,000,000 (it's not supposed to die from HP damage. It has a different system to counter act this.)
Inflation: 100%. If this reaches either 200% or 0%, the Balloon Whelp will either pop or just kinda sag. Either way, that kills it instantly. Whenever the Balloon Whelp takes direct damage, that reduces its inflation by (damage taken) / 500. Or, if the attacker uses a sharp implement, the inflation loss is multiplied by 1.5. So it taking 5,000 damage will deflate it by 10% or 15% if the attacker used something like a sword or needle. People can inflate it in a similar manner. Count it as the amount they would have healed / 500.
Its damage is a little below average (about 3,000 per hit). However, for every 20% above 100% inflation, its damage increases by 10%. For every 20% below 100% inflation, its evasion increases by 5%. Counts as airborn while its inflation is above 150% if that matters at all.
Special attack: Helium breath. Can be used once every other turn. Doing so will reduce inflation by 15% to deal 5,000 damage to two enemies and make their voices high pitched and squeaky, meaning nobody can take them seriously anymore. For the next two turns, their damage is reduced by 20%.
See? Simple. Only 3 paragraphs of text. Nerf/buff as needed. It's supposed to be kinda tanky though. It attacks one of the two phantoms with its colorful balloon claws, but not before I get out an air pump and inflate it some more by pumping wildly.
Charges: 5/50
5/25
+1 to Mythic, +1 to Topazian
=====For the most part, this is the relevance line. Cross at your own risk=====
I look towards Mikoto, Inari and the Veteran and I gasp. I had suspected that there was some kooky time travel stuff happening, but now I knew for sure. Funny how things work out. Just a few days ago, I was staring at Wilson's terrible paw writing and feeling guilty for not stopping Inari and Mikoto from fighting each other in their game. Eventually, each would pick a puppet champion to manipulate and force against the other spirit's champion. Inari happened to choose Wilson and Mikoto happened to choose Willow. Now, I happened to like both of them and knew that if they were forced to fight each other, the winner might end off worse than the loser. But now, I had the chance to warn everyone about what would happen to drive Mikoro and Inari apart like that. I started running towards them, feeling like I could save Wilson before he was even born, but I stopped. If I warned everyone on what was to come, Wilson would die. Without Inari, he would be just a normal fox and die to that stupid terror spider. Would that effect the second war? If Wilson died, then I would never get the Staff of Ysera, and who knows what rippling butterfly effect that could have? At best, nothing. At worst, all my companions would die to that glitch like thing that would end up destroying Minecraft because I wasn't there to teleport them out. So, according to that, I shouldn't warn Mikoto. But if I did that, then several people would suffer, such as Mikoto, Inari, Gail, the Veteran, and... myself. Was the safety of five worth the life of one? And what about when twenty more lives might depend on that one? I felt like the doctor in all those moral dilemma situations. So I stood there, paralyzed with indecision. Luckily for me and the story, my internet provider made the decision for me as my connection timed out and I stopped existing. How dues ex machina. I had only planned on staying here as an actual fighting force until I established my other characters. If I do make another appearance, it will probably be past me. So... bye.
Mikoto watches me vanish before looking up at the Veteran, surprised and by the tone of his voice, afraid.
Jid she just... reply to you? Even though you were speaking a different language that only... five people know?
The Veteran, on the other hand, did not look or sound impressed.
And while she was both several chunks away and fighting off just about everyone? Yes. She did. As a godmodder, she can read Talist's translations. Rou uliu kous qie'uliu plues mier cinplsunkrl cinpllèsununs, uliununs.
Now he addresses UserZero directly.
If by "one of them" you mean your end, you're right. The only one Psi actually managed to kill was that guy who appeared for about ten seconds. Seems like a poor track record. Let's see what you have. We probably aren't as strong as you, but we are so much more resilient.
The Veteran takes the Sleuth's candy corn and turns it over in his hands. What if I want to make it a plot device, huh?
Thank you? I expected to see at least one other fighter from before. We don't have much else to do, I suppose. Mikoto, catch.
Huh? Catch wh- ah!
The Veteran flicked the bit of candy corn towards Mikoto, causing it to bounce off his head and land on a nearby rock.
Hrmph. Fery funny.
=====Alchemies=====
A couple of chunks back, Gail was following the Veteran. Mikoto had told her to stay behind, but she wanted to explore and see what was going on for herself. She wasn't that strong, so she was staying a good distance behind. I changed my avatar specifically because I had no other way to exactly describe Gail. So, she looks like that, white like snow or pearl. She seemed to be constantly streaming mist behind her that quickly dissipated in the sunlight. Along the way to see what was happening, she found something called an "alchemiter". Looking at it, she felt a strange sense of deja-vu. Well, not exactly because deja-vu implies an echo to a previous event. This felt like an echo to a future event, and one that didn't even involve her. Regardless, she tried it out.
You couldn't do that-you'd have to spend both charges at once to make the 'ammo' and the entity, though that wouldn't be considered loopholing the system and you could use both, as long as the Ammo has HP as well.
Crystal sees the Alchemiter is finally available. “Ahh, just like old times. Now I can really start to have fun."
Wand of Magic Missile && Minigun == Magic Missile Minigun 1/?
WAND OF MAGIC MISSILE: A wand that allows the holder to invoke the spell Magic Missile.
MINIGUN: Shamelessly swiped from TF2.
Sword && Coyote’s Tooth == ??? 1/?
DAGGER: A basic dagger. Not much to see here.
COYOTE’S TOOTH: From Gunnerkrigg Court - a knife that is sharp enough to cut iron girders like butter, cut a falling steel bearing in half without stopping its fall, and sharp enough to cut a shadow man from the floor. Resonates with the trickster-god Coyote’s laughter when unsheathed. Also has the alternate form of a normal-looking coyote tooth.
10/10 EXPENDED!
Crystal raises his hands to the sky, invoking his granted powers of entity-summoning for the first time since joining DTG in the first place. A restrained summoning circle forms around him, a rip opening in the very fabric of reality and dumping out a normal-looking person. Until it shifts and forms a normal-looking earth elemental. And then a normal-looking Alpha Phantom. And then it just reverts to its true form, a gangly-looking humanoid with features that look only half there.
Doppelganger summoned!
Alignment: Anti-Zero.
HP: Normal for a 10-post charge- 40,000 perhaps?
Passive: Shapechange: The doppelganger reflexively shapeshifts to blend in with enemies, changing forms at a whim. There is a 10% chance an attack aimed at it will miss and hit a Pro-Zero entity instead.
Crystal summons a cloud of daggers formed of pure force, then magically compresses all of them into one dagger and throws that dagger at the SOAPTank. When it hits, it explodes in a burst of magical daggers, slicing through the SOAPTank.
Crystal pulls out a sniper rifle, aims at the SOAPTank, and… CRACK! Hey, that wasn’t a bullet. It was a bullet that, on hit, teleports everything within a 2-meter radius 500 meters straight up! After a few seconds, the SOAPTank crashes back down onto the ground, metal crumpling from the hit.
Realizing that it might be a little while before doggy can arrive, he begins to hatch another plan. He needed a way of getting some bodies on the field. Bomber takes out his phone again and decides to search his list extensive list of contacts for an answer.
"Lets see, Scrazz is busy, Michel is setting up doggy already, busy...busy...oh. Oh, here we go."
A long time ago Bomber had gone out on a night of drinking and made a few buddies. In particular, the owner of a bar known as The Grim Guzzler. Coren Direbrew was his name, and keeping everyone absolutely hammered is his game. Bomber offered to give the place extra funding, an offer Coren couldn't refuse. More money meant more booze for him and his rambunctious friends. The Grim Guzzler is the sort of place where a myriad of interesting characters would drink, so it was the perfect resource to tap into. Bomber dialed the number, and answered a voice with a thick Scottish accent.
"Hey Coren. It's Bomber. I'm going to have to call in a favor."
"Oh, anythin' fur ye! What do ye need?"
"I'll need you to fire up a Mole Machine and send some of your lackeys over to me. I have the coordinates if you need them."
"How do ye plan to get 'em over there? From what I can tell, ye happen to be in another dimension or *hic* somethin'."
"I already have that covered. You should be getting a prototype Interdimensional Mole Machine delivered soon. It's basically a modification of the old Mole Machine and will get anyone almost anywhere, provided they have the dimensional coordinates. Which I do."
"Great! Now, I have ta ask ye another thing...what is in it for them? What do ye even need them for, anyhow?"
"The reason I need them is their incentive. I'm in probably what will be one of the biggest fights they will ever witness and I'm certain they would love to get a piece of the action. Plus, I'll buy you the next round of drinks."
"Then ye have a deal!"
And with that, Bomber had finished another request. It wouldn't be too long before some of Coren's irritable regulars arrive. And once they arrive, they will do their absolute best to pull as many of their friends into the brawl as well. Yes-- for them, it would be the bar fight of legends.
Bomber then stretched out his arm, which began glowing green. Wisps of ghostly fog curl around his arm, growing denser as they began to collect in his palm. An ethereal skull began to materialize, making a sound akin to cackling. Suddenly the skull was launched from Bomber's hand, wailing as it flew towards UserZero. The green fog that trailed the skull would start to choke anyone who lingered within its presence for too long. If the deathly bolt would impact, the target would feel crippling pain as if their very life were being sapped.
Doggy's Battery: 5/20 ==================== (+1 from Erelye, +1 from Modpack)
Mole Machine Inbound: 1/10 ===========
+2 to generic_username
EVERYONE GET IN HERE
UserZero blows so hard onto the Skull as it closes in that it completely reverses direction!
After Uzi accidentally tripped the alarm, soldiers flood in! They have anti-godmodding powers that prevent them from being one-hit ko'd by Zero's epic godmodding powers. Also, the base as a whole disables much of her abilities-turns out it's an entire anti-godmodding base! The soldiers move to attack her, but at least they're relatively weak.
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
A group of eldritch abominations invade the base! They are innately resistant to godmodding, ans quickly pummel Zero! She has to fight them, and they're VERY strong!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
A group of gods and goddesses from various pantheons invade the boss! What's more, they're all SUPERPOWERED for no reason at all! And have quadruple the resistance to godmodding anything else has ever had ever!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
Memetic versions of everything ever invade the base! That's right, literally every single object or person that has ever existed, ever, has been given thought, extreme superpowers, and anti-godmodding abilities! And they all have been imbued with an innate hatred for Zero!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
One Chu from Tazz's attack in TIW invades...
Zero just runs!
Hey, you're the guy who said no crossovers! No-one else will get why that's so threatening that she just runs! The whole attack fails!
Seeing as how the... Mundane approach to therapy on Richard didn't work so well, I zap him with a spell of forgetfulness.
Laser Gun || Basic Wand of Attacking: 1/??
He can't forget the damage the Tubas have done, period. It is imprinted into his mind like a brand onto a cow's side, and the memories of what happen burn with the intensity of five million suns. You're going to need to have something a bit stronger than that.
I summon up hundreds of undead warriors to rush at Zero, and start spinning, summoning a vortex that engulfs everything in it's path. Once this has damaged something I return everything to the ground and grab some bones.
Summons:
The Ground 7/25
There is No Other Way 5/10
+2 to Cryptic
UserZero spins the opposite way, stopping the cyclone, and then just beats all the skeletons into dust!
Leather Braced Handle && Iron Hammer Head == Iron Forge Hammer 2/?
Orb of Fire && Orb of Light == Holy Flame 2/?
I take out a brick and hurl it at Zero. However, I miss... I hurl twenty bricks at zero, and all those miss too. 'Alright, that's it'. I take out a cannon easily hidden underneath a hill, and fire it into the air. This causes a hail of bricks that... misses Zero. 'ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?' I then throw the last of my bricks up in the air, frustrated. Unfortunately, that lands right on my head...
'ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT'.
What zero doesn't notice is that this was meant to make me angry. So angry that I run at super speed (Remember it's super speed, normal speeds are not cool whatsoever) and kick her right in the face!
And then I calm down...
UserZero stops you by throwing a Brick at your face! You get so angry that you explode in her face, literally, but she tanks that with Blast Protection -1!
The Plains have given way to a jungle! The massive canopy and uneven ground makes aiming for anything on the ground difficult. All grounded units get 10% Evasion!
The Lesser Earth Elemental uses Earth Spike on the SOPA Tank, dealing 2,000 damage! The Fire Elemental follows up for another 2,000 damage, just enough to kill it! -10 distance to Yggdrasil! The Mango Monster heals the Lesser Earth Elemental for 6,000 HP and cherry-taps the Beta Phantom for 1 damage! The Splattershot Inkling uses Burst Bomb on the Beta Phantom for 6,000 damage! The Splat Charger Inkling (not Splat Roller apparently) sets up a Splat Bomb, which will detonate in the next EoTB if left unattended! The Balloon Whelp claws at the Beta Phantom for 3,500 damage! The Doppelganger combos in for an extra 5,000 damage!
The Slime attempts to aggress UserZero via a truck, but it fails! The Virus.DOS.SSR-II assails the Lesser Earth Elemental for 7,500 + 1,875 damage! They are then moved to the top of the entity list because them being in the middle was a mistake. Le derp1
The Beta Phantom slams the Lesser Earth Elemental for 6,000 + 1,250 damage with a ghostly wail! The Kanto and Johto Starters combo in and finish off the Lesser Earth elemental, each doing 7,000 damage!
Richard gives +2 to Talist and Bomber57 and, deciding to disengage from UserZero for now, forcefully stomps on the Virus.DOS.SSR-II! UserZero gives +2 to All PZ Players and slashes the Slime and Fire Minion out of existence!
The ferocious sandstorm pewters out!
Richard’s summoning Circle is complete, and it creates a large portal! Out of the portal come three massive figures-a towering Creeper, a titanic Zombie, and a colossal Skeleton, each one mutated to the point of barely being recognizeable as such and each one sporting fierce red eyes! Behold, the Terror Creeper, Zombie and Skeleton!
UserZero’s summoning circle is complete and it creates…Wait, no, that can’t be right. Wait, no, it is. Ugh. It creates a small group of freaking Minions. Everyone stares as they get into formation, each forming up until they’re roughly six feet up in the air and could barely fit through a door. UserZero then reaches to their sides, and flips them open like they actually ARE a door, revealing a space within! Out of this space comes two figures-one looks to be a businesswoman from the Victorian era, with various clothes of a rather muted shade, most noteworthy among them a dull green topper. On this one’s back is a massive pair of mechanical wings, and she wields a gun that looks, well, machine-like for lack of a better term, with exposed bronze gears. The other figure is a Creeper in a janitorial suit, somehow wielding a broom with his front-left leg. His nametag reveals his identity-“The Colegmerate, Chief Sanitation Officer.”
UserZero: so i guess that you were tired of being a glorified janitor today?
Colegmerate: You know I prefer killing to cleaning.
UserZero: of course, of course, it’s so boring but someone has to do it! the cleaning, i mean.
UserZero: just go get into position over there, near the front.
Colegmerate: Wait a minute…The Gamma-Rank, is that one-
UserZero: yep, that’s tuba boy! this is it!
Colegmerate: My my…Well, I suppose the matter has been postponed long enough.
The other woman steps up.
???: If I am to interrupt, Mrs. Chairman-
UserZero: hey, no need to be that boring and formal! call me userzero, or just uzi!
???: Well, alright then, UserZero.
???: As you have requested, I’ve taken the liberty of retrieving the solutions you requested for you.
The Victorian woman hands UserZero a bag.
???: It should have all the solutions you need. Keep in mind, though, the Clentaminator isn’t a weapon, or at least not a typical one.
???: It has no ability to directly attack others, it merely alters the climate with various ‘taints.’
???: Of course, I’ve included the neutralizing green solution as well.
UserZero: haha! yes! exactly what i needed! you’ll find the payment in the mail, and that’ll be all!
UserZero: well, unless you like sitting around in a warzone and all that! i don't think you do!
The mystery woman, quickly glancing at you and everyone else present, swiftly decides that it isn't worth it and heads back into the doorway, which you now pay attention to. Sadly, it is shadowed and Veiled by Godmodding energies, and you doubt you can penetrate what appears to be a darkness so palpable it almost feels physical. The door shuts, and the Minions that somehow were the door randomly explode, leaving the Colegmerate, who has taken the forefront of the Pro-Zero forces, eyeing up all of you before settling on Richard.
Godmodder477: She only sent one of you? Against me?
Colegmerate: The others are busy with their jobs within Godmodding incorporated. I was the only one immediately available.
Godmodder477: Is she seriously underestimating me that badly!? You hardly look like a Terror!
Colegmerate: You aren’t very much at all yourself, Tuba Boy, no matter how threatening you look.
Godmodder477: AUGH! Why do you keep calling me that! I was there for the Psi Godmodding wars, I helped code-
Colegmerate: Your achievements blind you to your shortcomings, you brat.
Colegmerate: You have driven yourself to the unreasonable standard of infalliability.
Colegmerate: My mother and employer would take weakness and purge it with a ruthlessness, whist you will simply deny it at every opportunity and cite your past.
Colegmerate: You will, of course, simply forget these words by the time it has lead to your downfall.
A moment of silence occurs. Richard actually looks a bit startled by that one, but quickly shakes his head.
Godmodder477: I’m citing my past to prove that my potential is infinite!
Godmodder477: You people keep putting me down as some piece of trash who was just ‘lucky’ to get my powers!
Godmodder477: Heads up, punks!
Godmodder477: I am a silent millionaire, a master investor!
Godmodder477: I game on a professional level!
Godmodder477: I have made more games than you’ll even know I’ve been in!
Godmodder477: I aced classes! I was a star on every sports team i joined!
Godmodder477: And that was all BEFORE I got to work with Notch, before I got to see Psi and gain my powers! You think I’m just some privileged punk because I grew up rich, but I have worked for everything I have! Do you think I’d stay rich if I didn’t do something about it?!
Godmodder477: I have drive, potential, intelligence, strength, charm, resources, EVERYTHING!
Godmodder477: I’m here to prove that you can’t top me! I’m the best human being alive! And all I have to do is kill her ONCE!
Godmodder477: Sure, things went south, but if I kill her now, that basically means she has no right to be the Omega-Plus Godmodder, and that means we’ll all know who’s going to win by the time I get to properly challenge her!
Godmodder477: And once that’s done, I’ll be the king! The BEST! The Ultimatum! Nothing will match me! Nothing will compare! Ever!
Colegmerate: Hrmph. Such bravado. I suppose it’s kept you from melancholy.
Colegmerate: But do not mistake facts for bias, Tuba Boy. Then again, I suppose the time for words is over, lest this just turn into a long argument.
Colegmerate: I am UserZero’s will, her arm. My mother-slash-employer has saw fit to send me to you thus that I aid in killing you. All of you, including you who’d ally themselves against her, and those who would simply cause chaos for their amusement.
Colegmerate: I assure you I will enjoy strangling the life out of all of you!
And after all of that, the Colegmerate starts bulging oddly, his form swelling as if something within wanted out. Anyone who thought to attack him at this point backed well off, sensing danger (and anyone beforehand would find him protected by an aura of Godmodding energy), and that was a very smart move in the end, as the Colegmerate’s form exploded shortly thereafter, releasing a massive smokescreen. Richard quickly pulls out the world’s most massive fan and blows the smoke away to reveal…Oh my.
The Colegmerate that now floats before you now resembles a massive octopus more than any creeper, with eight massive tentacles and a giant spiky maw underneath. Underneath the maw was the broom, now the center of a blinding sphere of electricity, barely contained within its orb-like form. What was more disturbing, however, was the presence of creeper faces and heads, as if the thing was literally made of creepers, stuck together by green flesh and poking out almost everywhere. Worse still, they spoke, and they spoke unified:
COLEGMERATE: CLEANSING TIIIIIIIIIIME!
The lowdown: This is it, the first boss! The Colegmerate is a bit of a doozy, though I’m sure he’s nothing you can’t handle! The Colegmerate has five parts total, but none of them are really mandatory to kill except one: The Brain. The Skull, of course, protects the brain and doesn’t do anything else, so you will have to go through that or find a way around. The Tentacles improve the Colegmerate’s attack power AND prevent you from bodyblocking entities; he’ll just reach over! The Maw and Orb relate to his Acquisition and Power Cleaning specials, but I don’t know what those specials do exactly. Oh, and finally, the third special counts down if the Brain isn’t protected by anything. All things considered that's probably an explosion timer, so I'd kill it quickly when the Brain gets exposed.
Fortunately, you have help! The Terrors, though not full bosses themselves, are still powerful entities that can help you fight this giant Creeper Octopus thing! The Terror Creeper can summon Minicreepers to block attacks and explodes to deal huge damage when on low HP; the Terror Zombie can bodyblock a load of entities and can occasionally inflict Infection, which will cause their attacks to go wild; finally, the Terror Skeleton can attack twice per turn and can give other entities Minicrits!
Terrain: Jungle (+10% Evasion for Grounded units)
Weather: Clear (no effect)
[N] Healing Seaweed: 1/1 HP. Heals 5,000 HP to whoever kills it first.
[N] Virus.DOS.SSR-II: 25,000/25,000 HP.
[AZ] Mango Monster: 50,000/50,000 HP. Deals 1 damage but Heals other entities.
[AZ] Balloon Whelp: 1,000,000/1,000,000 HP. Inflation = 100%. At 200% or 0% Inflation it dies instantly. Gains attack at higher inflation, gains evasiveness at lower Inflation. Airborn at 150% Inflation. Helium Breath: [||]
5/50 The Myth, The Legend, The Misspelling +2 from Bomber57
Gluegun && Sburb Logo || Rifle = Homestuck 3/3
HOMESTUCK: A green gun emblazoned with the image of the SBURB logo. Shoots massive green explosions of pure energy rather than glue.
A piece of paper with "Godmoder" written on it && Hammer 1/?
+2 Erelye
I point out that the water [REDACTED FOR SAFETY] writing words into action at the moment is horrible with typos and should doublecheck his updates more often. While Tazz is yelling at me to stop calling him that, I take the stick I hit UserZero with out of my inventory.
Golem: Time for the birth of a legendary weapon.
I quickly run up to Pricey, and shiv him in the heart with the stick.
Golem: I don't actually have any grievances with you right now, I just need someone I don't care about enough to do this to.
I then bind a portion of his soul to the stick, and finish creating the ROLEPLAYBLITERATOR.
Golem: ...I probably won't be using this any time soon.
I then put the Roleplaybliterator back into my inventory and instead turn to the Colegmerate.
Golem: Your name sucks and your mother is terrible at basic spelling, god forbid she ever enter a spelling bee.
I then casually boot up CIQ.exe and plug my laptop into the Source Code of Reality.
Golem: Time to test your limits.
CAT IMPOSSIBLE QUIZ - QUESTIONS 1-5
Q1. How many holes in a polo? [ONE] [TWO] [FOUR] [TWELVE]
I note that a polo has 4 holes in it, one for the head, 2 for the arms, and one for the rest of the body. To that end, I put the Colegmerate into a polo. However, the Colegmerate has 8 tentacles, and could really use a polo with more holes in it. I shrug, as I can't really do anything about that. However, I come up with a solution! All I have to do is lower the amount of limbs that the Colegmerate has, and then I can totally fit it into the polo! I then start hacking the Colegmerate's tentacles off with a rusty saw, giving it tetanus and causing it incredible pain.
Q2. Can a match box? [No, but a tin can] [Yes] [No] [Yes, one beat Mike Tyson]
I know deep in my heart that puns are always the proper answer, so I select "No, but a tin can." A tin then pops in, and beats up the Colegmerate with its amazing boxing skills.
I select K.O, and pull out the KO Cannon, hitting the Colegmerate's tentacles with the incredibly painful spring-loaded boxing glove. This pain makes the Colegmerate wish that it could just get beat up by the tin again, so I oblige.
Q4. Click the answer [OUT OF ORDER] [OUT OF ORDER] [OUT OF ORDER] [OUT OF ORDER]
I click the answer. The Colegmerate breathes a sigh of relief since there's clearly no way that I could hurt him with this question, but quickly finds its tentacles getting crushed by an orbital vending machine cannon. The vending machines are all out of order, but I can clearly see the items inside of it. Angered by their inaccessibility, I smash the vending machines open with a crowbar, causing glass to fly everywhere, cutting up the Colegmerate.
Q5. Put your mouse here ->O
I put my mouse on the button, and note that a maze pops up. I realize that there's no way to get to the other side without moving my cursor around the game window, so I do so. Unfortunately, my cursor is somehow connected to the Colegmerate magically, and moving the cursor somehow dragged him straight through several layers of dirt and stone.
I feel like this has satisfactorily damaged the Colegmerate for a single post, so I let up on the assault for now.
Going up into the thermosphere, I think to myself, “Just who does she think I am? Does she think I am a punching bag? Seriously, she took 2 damage from a plain stick, and she’s trying to judge me? I must thank her, though. Minecraftia looks lovely from up here. But this view cannot last, and what goes up…”
I begin to fall, picking up more and more speed. Normally, I’d reach terminal velocity, but Minecraft physics are not real world physics, so I continue to speed up. Eventually, I break the sound barrier, creating a large explosion up in the Mesosphere. As I reach the Troposphere, over 10 miles above Minecraft, I’ve reached Mach 4, meaning that I will land back on the battlefield in about 10 seconds. My clothes by now would have burnt off, but mine are fireproof. And waterproof. And explosionproof. That doesn’t mean that I am not currently engulfed in flames twice my size. I aim myself at the small city that was the hammer I was smacked with, though I prepare to change my direction. And I do! As soon as I see User Zero, or rather, the tiny speck that is in the middle of the raging battle, I steer myself towards her. I hold my fist out, while falling, and prepare to punch the top of her head at about 3400 miles per hour. While engulfed in flames. The flames coalesce into a custom enchantment: Armor Piercing I. This enchantment ignores armor, including armor enchantments, when calculating things such as damage. It is I, like infinity I, because I level means that all armor effects are ignored. The fist is travelling so fast that even the air around it is feeling pain, despite it being physically impossible for it to feel pain in the first place.
Anyone who looks up can see a slowly growing body. It starts as an orange speck, and then becomes slightly larger. I quickly cast illusory magic that makes me disappear from human sight (or sight in general. Basically, I am no longer reflecting light; it just passes through me).
I say something.
Before anyone can hear what I just said, as I am moving much faster than the speed of sound, my enchanted fist makes contact with UserZero. Accompanying the contact is a loud BOOM that takes place a couple of minutes later, as the sounds from my breaking the sound barrier finally reach the battlefield. This is followed by my voice:
“UserZero! You failed physics, didn’t you? What goes up, must come DOWN ON YOUR SKULL!”
If this cannot target UserZero/she avoids it because she just summoned a boss, then this entire attack hits the Colegmerate's skull, and sends concussive shockwaves into the brain. Though I still do taunt UserZero.
+2 Cobalt
10/20 Maine Cannon
8/25 Elizabeth
A blue door appears out of thin air, and opens. Out walks a teenage girl in blue attire, holding a large book with a whimsical smile on her face. You, the audience, do not know whether to focus on that, her piercing golden eyes, or the GIGANTIC MONSTER standing 50 feet from us. I, since I know what I am going to write, walk up to the girl.
I start the conversation: “You’re late. Erebus has already resurrected.”
“I know, but I had somewhere I needed to be. And you are…”
“Elizabeth, I’ve talked to you before. Remember the job I spoke about? Well, I have the perfect place for you to be.”
“You said that you could take me to a place where the power gathering would make the P-1 Climax look like a candle next to the sun.”
“I know, I know. But before we go, do you want to take out the trash, or shall I?”
The whimsical look on her face hardens. “Erebus is my burden to bear. I took it in his place,” staring at the golden gates, “and I will hold to that promise!”
I copy the design of my original trap (the one with leaves and spikes) and dig several of copies across the field. I then grab a set of smoke bombs and begin throwing them around the throughout the battlefield.
And now, for alchemies!
Orb of the Sun && Orb of the Moon = ??? (1/?)
Betty Crocker Fruit Gushers && Can of Shaving Cream = Betty Crocker Barbasol Bomb (1/?)
=Turn Two=
(9 / 20) A Construction (+2 total from Jon, Cobalt)
(10 / 10) Identity Crisis -> Summoning...
+1 to Jon
+1 to Cobalt
=Summon=
A small jukebox descends from above, coupled with a parachute. It lands on the Battlefield, then starts blaring music.
"YOU'RE A KID NOW YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID YOU'RE A SQUID YOU'RE A KID NOWWWWWW"
Suddenly, some of the battlefield is carpeted with Ink, as two figures super-jump onto the battlefield!
[AZ] Inkling (Splattershot)
HP: 20,000
Attacks:
Ink Burst: Fires a small salvo of orange ink. Deals light damage to two entities. Adds 1 stack of Ink to each target.
Burst Bomb: Causes a small ink explosion, dealing moderate damage to one entity. Adds 1-2 stacks of Ink.
Bomb Rush: Uses Burst Bomb three times in a row. Cannot hit a target multiple times. 3 Turn Charge.
Passive:
Ink: If an entity obtains 5 stacks of ink, they explode in an inky burst, taking high damage! Upon exploding, Ink stacks drop to 0.
[AZ] Inkling (Splat Charger)
HP: 20,000
Attacks:
Charge Shot: Charges up a powerful shot! Deals high damage, but takes a turn to fire. (akin to Pokemon's Solar Beam) Adds 3 stacks of Ink to the target.
Splat Bomb: Summons a 3,000 HP Splat Bomb! The bomb explodes one turn after summoning if not killed, dealing high damage to two random entities. Hit targets obtain 2 stacks of ink.
Bomb Rush: Uses Splat Bomb three times in a row. 3 Turn Charge.
Passive:
Ink: If an entity obtains 5 stacks of ink, they explode in an inky burst, taking high damage! Upon exploding, Ink stacks drop to 0.
=Action=
I then equip both Inklings with Fireproof armor, to negate / minimize damage from the terrain. The armor is created from finest dragon scales, improved with the finest in candy-armor technology.
The Inkling with the Splattershot will use Burst Bomb on the Beta Phantom, while the Inkling with the Splat Charger will use Splat Bomb.
The dream that you've never dreamed is suddenly about to FLOWER.
Chair-City? (Ind) (Tra)
The L()rd tries out the alchemiter.
Glove || Diamond Sword = ???
While waiting for that, he proceeds to shoot the SOAPtank (or a phantom if it's dead) with a Deja Vu gun. While waiting for that, he proceeds to shoot the SOAPtank (or a phantom if it's dead) with a Deja Vu gun.
THE PROPHECY SEEMED FAR AWAY
BUT FINALLY WE'VE REACHED THE DAY
GIVE UP THE PAST, EMBRACE THE STRANGE
EVERYTHING YOU CARE ABOUT WILL CHANGE
When both sides are doomed, which do you choose?
DOWN HERE IT'S KILL OR BE KILLED
9/25 Terrible Tastes +1 from Erelye
2/50 The Myth, The Legend, The Misspelling
Gluegun && Sburb Logo || Rifle = Homestuck 2/3
(Ubersaw && Picture of User0's Minecraft Skin) || Axe = ?? 2/?
+2 Erelye
I take out a pretzel, then pull out Pricey's vocal cords and use them to top the pretzel. Since UserZero's favorite food is pretzels and her favorite pretzel topping is vocal cords, she is incredibly desperate to get it. I then order her to go on a quest for it, but she's too smart for that and knows that it would be entirely too long, annoying, contradictory and possibly even damaging. I'm proud of her genre savviness, so I offer to give it to her if she just punches herself as far back and as damagingly as possible. If she attacks me, I just burn the pretzel to ashes.
Cat drawn by me. Accepting requests, depending on a lot of things. DTG Atsume: http://www.imgur.com/a/tij95
1'-[7']-{'3}-'3-'3 '6-11'-7'-6'-7' '1-{'3}-8'-12'-'3-2'
'10-'5-'8-'11 1'-[7']-8'-7'-'3 '2-11'-2'-'9-7'
'10-'5-'3-'3 1'-[7']-'3 '10-8'-{'3}-['10]-4'-7'
'10-{'3}-'3-'3-'6-8'-4' {'3}-11'-2'-'9-7'
Spam restoration: http://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/forums/forum-discussion-info/2195940-posts-threads-deleted-because-of-spam-filter-place
Official DTG Cards Against Humanity suggestion pad: http://piratepad.net/DTGCAH
I punch UserZero, nothing else, just, a punch.
The Mango Monster heals any AZ thing that needs health.
Quote: 5/50 (+1 from Irecreeper)
Kamikaze: 1/15
Ale && Soda Popper = ??? (2/???)
Sniper Rifle I I Minigun = ??? (1/???)
It's High Noon
((OK I think I get it, but about the alchemies, do I have to somehow get it earlier or just get it magically now))
Weather Golems: 1/10
I create a simple wooden sword, ProZero people laugh. I then hit them and it launches them into the sky, (as it had the enchantment fast.high.levitation but dealing no damage. when they come back down it does though
I'm almost completely inactive, in case you're trawling through really old threads and notice me somewhere.
HA! THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I'VE DAMAGED THE GODMODDER! And it was with a stupid reference to Corner Gas... huh...
Game play question... Do charges have to be used up all at once? I was thinking of making two parallel 50 post charges. One summons an entity and whenever it attacks it uses up 5 posts worth of charge from the other 50 post charge. Also, you can't make entities stronger than 50 posts worth of stuff, but can you heal them with charges? Seems like you should be able to. Also, could we please NOT have a duplicator? The duplicator made potions really useless. Maybe give them two or three charges instead.
I finish my first summon! Ticker tape parade! With a massive 5/5 post charge, I get out a LOT of balloons and start tying them together in what looks like the shape of a small dragon. I summon the BALLOON WHELP! Let's start off nice and simple. ... Simple for me anyway.
[AZ] HP: 1,000,000/1,000,000 (it's not supposed to die from HP damage. It has a different system to counter act this.)
Inflation: 100%. If this reaches either 200% or 0%, the Balloon Whelp will either pop or just kinda sag. Either way, that kills it instantly. Whenever the Balloon Whelp takes direct damage, that reduces its inflation by (damage taken) / 500. Or, if the attacker uses a sharp implement, the inflation loss is multiplied by 1.5. So it taking 5,000 damage will deflate it by 10% or 15% if the attacker used something like a sword or needle. People can inflate it in a similar manner. Count it as the amount they would have healed / 500.
Its damage is a little below average (about 3,000 per hit). However, for every 20% above 100% inflation, its damage increases by 10%. For every 20% below 100% inflation, its evasion increases by 5%. Counts as airborn while its inflation is above 150% if that matters at all.
Special attack: Helium breath. Can be used once every other turn. Doing so will reduce inflation by 15% to deal 5,000 damage to two enemies and make their voices high pitched and squeaky, meaning nobody can take them seriously anymore. For the next two turns, their damage is reduced by 20%.
See? Simple. Only 3 paragraphs of text. Nerf/buff as needed. It's supposed to be kinda tanky though. It attacks one of the two phantoms with its colorful balloon claws, but not before I get out an air pump and inflate it some more by pumping wildly.
Charges: 5/50
5/25
+1 to Mythic, +1 to Topazian
=====For the most part, this is the relevance line. Cross at your own risk=====
I look towards Mikoto, Inari and the Veteran and I gasp. I had suspected that there was some kooky time travel stuff happening, but now I knew for sure. Funny how things work out. Just a few days ago, I was staring at Wilson's terrible paw writing and feeling guilty for not stopping Inari and Mikoto from fighting each other in their game. Eventually, each would pick a puppet champion to manipulate and force against the other spirit's champion. Inari happened to choose Wilson and Mikoto happened to choose Willow. Now, I happened to like both of them and knew that if they were forced to fight each other, the winner might end off worse than the loser. But now, I had the chance to warn everyone about what would happen to drive Mikoro and Inari apart like that. I started running towards them, feeling like I could save Wilson before he was even born, but I stopped. If I warned everyone on what was to come, Wilson would die. Without Inari, he would be just a normal fox and die to that stupid terror spider. Would that effect the second war? If Wilson died, then I would never get the Staff of Ysera, and who knows what rippling butterfly effect that could have? At best, nothing. At worst, all my companions would die to that glitch like thing that would end up destroying Minecraft because I wasn't there to teleport them out. So, according to that, I shouldn't warn Mikoto. But if I did that, then several people would suffer, such as Mikoto, Inari, Gail, the Veteran, and... myself. Was the safety of five worth the life of one? And what about when twenty more lives might depend on that one? I felt like the doctor in all those moral dilemma situations. So I stood there, paralyzed with indecision. Luckily for me and the story, my internet provider made the decision for me as my connection timed out and I stopped existing. How dues ex machina. I had only planned on staying here as an actual fighting force until I established my other characters. If I do make another appearance, it will probably be past me. So... bye.
Mikoto watches me vanish before looking up at the Veteran, surprised and by the tone of his voice, afraid.
Jid she just... reply to you? Even though you were speaking a different language that only... five people know?
The Veteran, on the other hand, did not look or sound impressed.
And while she was both several chunks away and fighting off just about everyone? Yes. She did. As a godmodder, she can read Talist's translations. Rou uliu kous qie'uliu plues mier cinplsunkrl cinpllèsununs, uliununs.
Now he addresses UserZero directly.
If by "one of them" you mean your end, you're right. The only one Psi actually managed to kill was that guy who appeared for about ten seconds. Seems like a poor track record. Let's see what you have. We probably aren't as strong as you, but we are so much more resilient.
The Veteran takes the Sleuth's candy corn and turns it over in his hands. What if I want to make it a plot device, huh?
Thank you? I expected to see at least one other fighter from before. We don't have much else to do, I suppose. Mikoto, catch.
Huh? Catch wh- ah!
The Veteran flicked the bit of candy corn towards Mikoto, causing it to bounce off his head and land on a nearby rock.
Hrmph. Fery funny.
=====Alchemies=====
A couple of chunks back, Gail was following the Veteran. Mikoto had told her to stay behind, but she wanted to explore and see what was going on for herself. She wasn't that strong, so she was staying a good distance behind. I changed my avatar specifically because I had no other way to exactly describe Gail. So, she looks like that, white like snow or pearl. She seemed to be constantly streaming mist behind her that quickly dissipated in the sunlight. Along the way to see what was happening, she found something called an "alchemiter". Looking at it, she felt a strange sense of deja-vu. Well, not exactly because deja-vu implies an echo to a previous event. This felt like an echo to a future event, and one that didn't even involve her. Regardless, she tried it out.
Battle Axe && Bottled Lightning && Malestorm winds = Storm Forged Axe 1/??
Great Hammer && Bottled Lightning && Seeing Stone = Charged Hammer 1/??
There's a difference between a hero and a champion. A champion overcomes threats, but a hero overcomes fears.
My Best Map so farAll my maps, click here.
Then there's also a Youtube channel I'm somewhat involved in.
dARKnESS 10/25. (+1 from Richard.)
Proteus 10/10. COMPLETED! (+1 from Richard.)
+1 to Erelye, +1 to Twin.
Crystal sees the Alchemiter is finally available. “Ahh, just like old times. Now I can really start to have fun."
Wand of Magic Missile && Minigun == Magic Missile Minigun 1/?
WAND OF MAGIC MISSILE: A wand that allows the holder to invoke the spell Magic Missile.
MINIGUN: Shamelessly swiped from TF2.
Sword && Coyote’s Tooth == ??? 1/?
DAGGER: A basic dagger. Not much to see here.
COYOTE’S TOOTH: From Gunnerkrigg Court - a knife that is sharp enough to cut iron girders like butter, cut a falling steel bearing in half without stopping its fall, and sharp enough to cut a shadow man from the floor. Resonates with the trickster-god Coyote’s laughter when unsheathed. Also has the alternate form of a normal-looking coyote tooth.
10/10 EXPENDED!
Crystal raises his hands to the sky, invoking his granted powers of entity-summoning for the first time since joining DTG in the first place. A restrained summoning circle forms around him, a rip opening in the very fabric of reality and dumping out a normal-looking person. Until it shifts and forms a normal-looking earth elemental. And then a normal-looking Alpha Phantom. And then it just reverts to its true form, a gangly-looking humanoid with features that look only half there.
Doppelganger summoned!
Alignment: Anti-Zero.
HP: Normal for a 10-post charge- 40,000 perhaps?
Passive: Shapechange: The doppelganger reflexively shapeshifts to blend in with enemies, changing forms at a whim. There is a 10% chance an attack aimed at it will miss and hit a Pro-Zero entity instead.
Crystal summons a cloud of daggers formed of pure force, then magically compresses all of them into one dagger and throws that dagger at the SOAPTank. When it hits, it explodes in a burst of magical daggers, slicing through the SOAPTank.
0rigin Point.
Avatar by TwinBuilder.
I begin summoning Asura the Destructor
Asura: 1/50
He scream
dARKnESS 11/25.
____ 1/10
+1 to Erelye, +1 to Twin.
Wand of Magic Missile && Minigun == Magic Missile Minigun 2/?
Sword && Coyote’s Tooth == ??? 2/?
Crystal pulls out a sniper rifle, aims at the SOAPTank, and… CRACK! Hey, that wasn’t a bullet. It was a bullet that, on hit, teleports everything within a 2-meter radius 500 meters straight up! After a few seconds, the SOAPTank crashes back down onto the ground, metal crumpling from the hit.
0rigin Point.
Avatar by TwinBuilder.
Realizing that it might be a little while before doggy can arrive, he begins to hatch another plan. He needed a way of getting some bodies on the field. Bomber takes out his phone again and decides to search his list extensive list of contacts for an answer.
"Lets see, Scrazz is busy, Michel is setting up doggy already, busy...busy...oh. Oh, here we go."
A long time ago Bomber had gone out on a night of drinking and made a few buddies. In particular, the owner of a bar known as The Grim Guzzler. Coren Direbrew was his name, and keeping everyone absolutely hammered is his game. Bomber offered to give the place extra funding, an offer Coren couldn't refuse. More money meant more booze for him and his rambunctious friends. The Grim Guzzler is the sort of place where a myriad of interesting characters would drink, so it was the perfect resource to tap into. Bomber dialed the number, and answered a voice with a thick Scottish accent.
"Hey Coren. It's Bomber. I'm going to have to call in a favor."
"Oh, anythin' fur ye! What do ye need?"
"I'll need you to fire up a Mole Machine and send some of your lackeys over to me. I have the coordinates if you need them."
"How do ye plan to get 'em over there? From what I can tell, ye happen to be in another dimension or *hic* somethin'."
"I already have that covered. You should be getting a prototype Interdimensional Mole Machine delivered soon. It's basically a modification of the old Mole Machine and will get anyone almost anywhere, provided they have the dimensional coordinates. Which I do."
"Great! Now, I have ta ask ye another thing...what is in it for them? What do ye even need them for, anyhow?"
"The reason I need them is their incentive. I'm in probably what will be one of the biggest fights they will ever witness and I'm certain they would love to get a piece of the action. Plus, I'll buy you the next round of drinks."
"Then ye have a deal!"
And with that, Bomber had finished another request. It wouldn't be too long before some of Coren's irritable regulars arrive. And once they arrive, they will do their absolute best to pull as many of their friends into the brawl as well. Yes-- for them, it would be the bar fight of legends.
Bomber then stretched out his arm, which began glowing green. Wisps of ghostly fog curl around his arm, growing denser as they began to collect in his palm. An ethereal skull began to materialize, making a sound akin to cackling. Suddenly the skull was launched from Bomber's hand, wailing as it flew towards UserZero. The green fog that trailed the skull would start to choke anyone who lingered within its presence for too long. If the deathly bolt would impact, the target would feel crippling pain as if their very life were being sapped.
Doggy's Battery: 5/20 ==================== (+1 from Erelye, +1 from Modpack)
Mole Machine Inbound: 1/10 ===========
+2 to generic_username
UMVAEQLV SPD DWZQWVAW PXDGE WTTI JDQOX
IKL OJEY BEM VCRVMPB DKGSB XXHGACA
JWJVAWA TQDN GZ UXL XTOX BEMAT FPIOA
I cast Spambot Protection Shield on the Lesser Earth Elemental (1500 Shield Hp)
5/9 Factory(
4/10 Spell book
2+ to Richard's summoning
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
I put fire on the SOAPTank (Soap + Fire = Not Good)
??? 2/50
Elite Swordmaster 2/30
+1 Richard/Godmodder +1 Talist
In the world that we are beating some stuff now.
Now that Happened! Where we all begins.
When Worlds Collide in Destroy The Godmodder, There is the massive Colosseum that holds all that onslaught.
The Contact: Part 5: Base Invasion
After Uzi accidentally tripped the alarm, soldiers flood in! They have anti-godmodding powers that prevent them from being one-hit ko'd by Zero's epic godmodding powers. Also, the base as a whole disables much of her abilities-turns out it's an entire anti-godmodding base! The soldiers move to attack her, but at least they're relatively weak.
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
A group of eldritch abominations invade the base! They are innately resistant to godmodding, ans quickly pummel Zero! She has to fight them, and they're VERY strong!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
A group of gods and goddesses from various pantheons invade the boss! What's more, they're all SUPERPOWERED for no reason at all! And have quadruple the resistance to godmodding anything else has ever had ever!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
Memetic versions of everything ever invade the base! That's right, literally every single object or person that has ever existed, ever, has been given thought, extreme superpowers, and anti-godmodding abilities! And they all have been imbued with an innate hatred for Zero!
As Zero kills most of the base's garrison, it turns out another force wanted the base! They invade, and quickly kill all the soldiers Uzi hadn't killed!
One Chu from Tazz's attack in TIW invades...
Zero just runs!
Check out my bad CTM map reviews here.
Kanohi Hau Nuva: 4/25
Skarmory: 4/25
Seeing as how the... Mundane approach to therapy on Richard didn't work so well, I zap him with a spell of forgetfulness.
Laser Gun || Basic Wand of Attacking: 1/??
DTG0 Inventory: Radiant Sights, Spellweaver, Thunderstruck, Kanohi Hau Nuva
Mask work: Coming Soon!
BIONICLE Antics
I summon up hundreds of undead warriors to rush at Zero, and start spinning, summoning a vortex that engulfs everything in it's path. Once this has damaged something I return everything to the ground and grab some bones.
Summons:
The Ground 7/25
There is No Other Way 5/10
+2 to Cryptic
Wow, interesting.
A day without light,
A night without breath.
A single star left,
To swallow the rest.
With each light snuffed by a single man's tome...
What will be left to lead HER back home?
+2 to Erelye
Small Base 10/15
Leather Braced Handle && Iron Hammer Head == Iron Forge Hammer 2/?
Orb of Fire && Orb of Light == Holy Flame 2/?
I take out a brick and hurl it at Zero. However, I miss... I hurl twenty bricks at zero, and all those miss too. 'Alright, that's it'. I take out a cannon easily hidden underneath a hill, and fire it into the air. This causes a hail of bricks that... misses Zero. 'ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?' I then throw the last of my bricks up in the air, frustrated. Unfortunately, that lands right on my head...
'ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT'.
What zero doesn't notice is that this was meant to make me angry. So angry that I run at super speed (Remember it's super speed, normal speeds are not cool whatsoever) and kick her right in the face!
And then I calm down...
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ALL Entities healed for 5,000 HP! Hey, it's Mass Heal.
Fire Minion Summoned!
Flame Combo might be, but who do you target?
I explicitly changed them because Richard's forces were always represented by blue, while UserZero is represented by a color very close to straight red.
This IS a double post, you know. Not allowed. (I'll just let you know she'd have blown up the Popcorn with a laser and not care for the mispellings).
...Probably should edit that into the OP.
It's neither of those things-the Sumoning Circles are made of pure godmodding energy. UserZero blinks all the glitter out of her eyes.
That was a mistake, but you know what, we'll roll with it. SOPA tank added! UserZero convinces the tank back to her side with her free Health Insurance plan (and yes, Tanks can have health insurance) supplied by Godmodding Incorporated! The buffs are too strong for an instant action, so it merely gains an extra +5000 HP current and max.
8,000 damage to the more-damaged Alpha Phantom!
You find everything except the Popcorn; it appears UserZero has literally oblitherated every last Popcorn kernal on the server...But it gestures to Richard, implying he might have saved some.
Fire doused! The plains turn back to normal.
The 1st Alpha Phantom is trapped by your Void sphere! It'll take damage when it does an action in the EoTB and won't be able to do it properly.
6,000 + 1,500 damage to the Lesser Earth Elemental! (The + 1,500 is the -25% defense kicking in, giving you an extra quarter of damage).
The tuba was destroyed last turn!
UserZero: i should elaborate.
UserZero: i am dissapointed in you.
UserZero: specifically, i am dissapointed in you for not thinking of moving half of an inch away after doing that attack.
She proceeds to knock you right into the sky with a hammer roughly the size of a small city.
1,000 + 250 damage to the Lesser Earth Elemental! Your entities will do as you say.
Your third summoned Alpha Phantom is attacked by the Curse of Repetetiveness, and cannot use Anti-Auda and has less HP! I told you that you shouldn't spam charges, though it was effective at getting PZ Bodies out there...
Dark forces emit around you as you make your despicable chant to summon one of the most fowl of Dream Demons! The world goes monochrome, you start chanting something without your knowing, and...
...A Freddy Head appears. Eyes and all. You are about to dismiss it when it starts talking, like a text-to-speech program was used to make it speak:
Bill Cipher: HEY THERE! YOU'VE REACHED THE ANSWERING MACHINE OF BILL CIPHER, DREAM DEMON! IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR BUSINESS CARDS, DON'T BOTHER. I HAND THOSE OUT ON WEDNESDAYS. IF YOU'RE HERE FOR THE LOCAL BARBEQUE, YOU'VE MISSED THAT! IT WAS YESTERDAY! WE'LL BE HAVING SOME LEFTOVERS TOMORROW NIGHT, THOUGH! HUMAN LEGS AND MUTATED EYEBALLS! DELICIOUS! IF YOU'RE HEARING THIS, THEN I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW! MAYBE I'M AWAY ON A DEAL WITH SOMEONE ELSE, OR MAYBE I'M BUSY LOOKING DOWN ON YOUR MORTAL REALM WITH MY NEARLY OMNISCIENT DREAM BUBBLE! WHATEVER I'M DOING RIGHT NOW, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOU! IN FACT, NO ONE DOES! THAT'S PROBABLY WHY YOU'VE STOOPED SO LOW THAT YOU'RE MAKING A LITERAL DEAL WITH THE DEVIL! LATER, SUCKER!
You do that.
Indeed it is.
UserZero plants her axe into the ground! It creates a huge fissure, and massive eruption of blood-red light erputs from it, destroying both pieces of popcorn AND sending you sky-high!
2,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
SCP-876 && Gold Banded Greatwood Wand = SCP-4822-DTG - Wands of the Element-Bender (Level 3: 1/4)
Iter Glass Phial1 && Right Femur = Bone of the Traveler (Level 2: 1/3)
UserZero grabs the perfectly normal can and throws it at you instead! 4,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
Gluegun && Sburb Logo || Rifle = Homestuck (Level 1: 1/2)
(Ubersaw && Picture of User0's Minecraft Skin) || Axe = Blood moon (Level 100)
UserZero immediately create's the Blood Moon to complement Vein Matters, as you were so kind to give her a recipie! She does so via console commands, as she's the server admin and all that.
14,000 damage to the 1st Alpha Phantom!
Void Aspected Silverwood Wand && Crystalline Auram Essentia = The Blank Wand (Level 5: 1/6)
Vial of Ink && Node in a Jar = Inky Node (Level 3: 1/4)
You can't Alchemize with Richard, and even if you could, that would just make /////////////////////////////////////////////////////! Richard just leaps away as you attempt to bash him, terrified beyond belief, before he finally musters the courage to make the Tuba explode in your face.
TM25 && Enchanted Bow = Daedalus Stormbow M (Level 5, 1/6)
Full Restore && Enchanted Bow = Crusader's Crossbow M (Level 4, 1/5)
UserZero: for now.
6,000 + 1,500 damage to the Earth Elemental!
Richard manages to use Console Commands to teleport himself back to the battlefield in the nick of time!
Stardust Dragon Staff && Special Stardust. Result: Special Stardust Dragon Staff (Level 0: 1/1).
9 Iron && 9 Copper = 18 Ferropper Ingots (Level 2: 1/3)
Gem Artifact && Mirror = Bane of Lapis (Level 2: 1/3)
You attempt to get a taglock of UserZero, which is basically a blood sample, only to realize that she does not have blood. The taglock penetrates her clothing in such a manner as to suggest UserZero, skin and all, is literally a walking blob of goo, goo that you suck into the Taglock. It quickly breaks out and tries to strangle you before returning to the whole mass, while UserZero madly cackles.
Richard just kicks you away when you try to get his blood sample. He's not just giving his blood away to anyone
Yes, because Bill certainly isn't a master-level manipulator who's HAT is capable of causing temporary, but complete mind control.
5,000 damage to Alpha Phantom 1! This kills it!
Basic Spellbook && Zoology Book = Grimoire for the Summoning of Fantastic Beasts: Level 3, 1/4
Gold + Stone + Wood + Iron + Diamond + Superisword Mould = ERROR! INVALID SYNTAX!
Uzi pulls out a mirror and bounces the Laser away!
You don't destroy the Healing Seaweed as that would make this attack, very technically, splash damage! 13,000 damage to the 2nd Alpha Phantom, which kicks it as a result!
9,000 damage to the SOPA Tank!
Bolter && Twin-Linking Kit = Twin-Linking Bolter (Level 2: 1/3)
15,000 damage to the 3rd Alpha Phantom! That thing is very much un-alived! Well, is it really alive in the first place being a ghost-oh who even cares.
The Spambot does absolutely nothing! The Summoning Circle needs no further attention drawn to it! It is then promptly erased from existence, effect included. Your sword is suddenly evaporated by a massive beam of godmodding energy before it even gets close to her! She really must hate Popcorn Machines.
Richard can't accept the +2, the summoing needs no further attention drawn to it!
The Beta Phantom is a ghost! It can't be irradiated!
UserZero: hrm, yeah, this needs to be solved, a bit.
UserZero: let me think here for a second-ohwait, yeah, I have that!
UserZero: yes, I think I can fix this little issue, immediately even!
UserZero proceeds to quickly shove an odd chip in the back of your head. It's activation quickly makes your head spin for a second, but after that is done, you instantly realize up to 909 Trillion different variations on the Basic Attack, allowing you to fight on-par with the others!
UserZero: yessss! An omega-class combat chip, that is. courtesy of yours truly!
UserZero: should update that basic attack routine to be WAY more flexible, manipulate the narrative or conflict or whatever it is, it's one of them, but it doesn't really matter!
UserZero: other effects can kick in after a while, but that should be immediately realizable!
+1,000 HP and 1,000 HP Regen for the next two turns for the Lesser Earth Elemental.
2,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
Lava Bucket && Pig head mounted on a spear = Magma Pig Staff (Level 4, 1/5)
Kanto and Johto starters summoned! They will do as you say. 1,500 + 325 damage to the Lesser Earth Elemental!
Leather Braced Handle && Iron Hammer Head == Iron Forge Hammer (Level 2, 1/3)
Orb of Fire && Orb of Light == Holy Flame (Level 3, 1/4)
UserZero barrels to the side in the nick of time!
6,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
3rd Post! Doesn't count!
Ale && Soda Popper = Ale Popper (Level 2, 1/3)
2,000 damage to the SOPATank!
Mango Monster summoned!
But the Popcorn kernel was destroyed!
The Curse of Repetetiveness mercifully kicks in, preventing you from summoning a Tuba-based entity so soon after a Tuba summon!
You fireproof the duo, despite there being no fire anymore!
Inklings Summoned! They will do as you say.
Glove || Diamond Sword = Diamond Glove (Level 1, 1/2)
5,000 damage to the SOPATank!
She just steals it instead and eats it!
She fistbumps the punching hand, sending you flying backwards!
It will do as you say.
9,000 damage to the SOPATank!
You couldn't do that-you'd have to spend both charges at once to make the 'ammo' and the entity, though that wouldn't be considered loopholing the system and you could use both, as long as the Ammo has HP as well.
Ballon Whelp Summoned! It will do as you say!
Wand of Magic Missile && Minigun = Magic Missile Minigun (Level 2, 1/3)
Sword && Coyote’s Tooth = Cyote's Sword (Level 3, 1/4)
Doppleganger Summoned!
7,000 damage to the SOPATank!
You do that.
2,000 damage to the Beta Phantom!
4,000 damage to the SOAPTank!
EVERYONE GET IN HERE
UserZero blows so hard onto the Skull as it closes in that it completely reverses direction!
You give the Earth Elemental some shielding!
The SOPATank isn't actually made of soap, but 1,000 damage!
Hey, you're the guy who said no crossovers! No-one else will get why that's so threatening that she just runs! The whole attack fails!
He can't forget the damage the Tubas have done, period. It is imprinted into his mind like a brand onto a cow's side, and the memories of what happen burn with the intensity of five million suns. You're going to need to have something a bit stronger than that.
Laser Gun || Basic Wand of Attacking = Magic Gun (Level 1, 1/2)
UserZero spins the opposite way, stopping the cyclone, and then just beats all the skeletons into dust!
UserZero stops you by throwing a Brick at your face! You get so angry that you explode in her face, literally, but she tanks that with Blast Protection -1!
The Plains have given way to a jungle! The massive canopy and uneven ground makes aiming for anything on the ground difficult. All grounded units get 10% Evasion!
The Lesser Earth Elemental uses Earth Spike on the SOPA Tank, dealing 2,000 damage! The Fire Elemental follows up for another 2,000 damage, just enough to kill it! -10 distance to Yggdrasil! The Mango Monster heals the Lesser Earth Elemental for 6,000 HP and cherry-taps the Beta Phantom for 1 damage! The Splattershot Inkling uses Burst Bomb on the Beta Phantom for 6,000 damage! The Splat Charger Inkling (not Splat Roller apparently) sets up a Splat Bomb, which will detonate in the next EoTB if left unattended! The Balloon Whelp claws at the Beta Phantom for 3,500 damage! The Doppelganger combos in for an extra 5,000 damage!
The Slime attempts to aggress UserZero via a truck, but it fails! The Virus.DOS.SSR-II assails the Lesser Earth Elemental for 7,500 + 1,875 damage! They are then moved to the top of the entity list because them being in the middle was a mistake. Le derp1
The Beta Phantom slams the Lesser Earth Elemental for 6,000 + 1,250 damage with a ghostly wail! The Kanto and Johto Starters combo in and finish off the Lesser Earth elemental, each doing 7,000 damage!
Richard gives +2 to Talist and Bomber57 and, deciding to disengage from UserZero for now, forcefully stomps on the Virus.DOS.SSR-II! UserZero gives +2 to All PZ Players and slashes the Slime and Fire Minion out of existence!
The ferocious sandstorm pewters out!
Richard’s summoning Circle is complete, and it creates a large portal! Out of the portal come three massive figures-a towering Creeper, a titanic Zombie, and a colossal Skeleton, each one mutated to the point of barely being recognizeable as such and each one sporting fierce red eyes! Behold, the Terror Creeper, Zombie and Skeleton!
UserZero’s summoning circle is complete and it creates…Wait, no, that can’t be right. Wait, no, it is. Ugh. It creates a small group of freaking Minions. Everyone stares as they get into formation, each forming up until they’re roughly six feet up in the air and could barely fit through a door. UserZero then reaches to their sides, and flips them open like they actually ARE a door, revealing a space within! Out of this space comes two figures-one looks to be a businesswoman from the Victorian era, with various clothes of a rather muted shade, most noteworthy among them a dull green topper. On this one’s back is a massive pair of mechanical wings, and she wields a gun that looks, well, machine-like for lack of a better term, with exposed bronze gears. The other figure is a Creeper in a janitorial suit, somehow wielding a broom with his front-left leg. His nametag reveals his identity-“The Colegmerate, Chief Sanitation Officer.”
UserZero: so i guess that you were tired of being a glorified janitor today?
Colegmerate: You know I prefer killing to cleaning.
UserZero: of course, of course, it’s so boring but someone has to do it! the cleaning, i mean.
UserZero: just go get into position over there, near the front.
Colegmerate: Wait a minute…The Gamma-Rank, is that one-
UserZero: yep, that’s tuba boy! this is it!
Colegmerate: My my…Well, I suppose the matter has been postponed long enough.
The other woman steps up.
???: If I am to interrupt, Mrs. Chairman-
UserZero: hey, no need to be that boring and formal! call me userzero, or just uzi!
???: Well, alright then, UserZero.
???: As you have requested, I’ve taken the liberty of retrieving the solutions you requested for you.
The Victorian woman hands UserZero a bag.
???: It should have all the solutions you need. Keep in mind, though, the Clentaminator isn’t a weapon, or at least not a typical one.
???: It has no ability to directly attack others, it merely alters the climate with various ‘taints.’
???: Of course, I’ve included the neutralizing green solution as well.
UserZero: haha! yes! exactly what i needed! you’ll find the payment in the mail, and that’ll be all!
UserZero: well, unless you like sitting around in a warzone and all that! i don't think you do!
The mystery woman, quickly glancing at you and everyone else present, swiftly decides that it isn't worth it and heads back into the doorway, which you now pay attention to. Sadly, it is shadowed and Veiled by Godmodding energies, and you doubt you can penetrate what appears to be a darkness so palpable it almost feels physical. The door shuts, and the Minions that somehow were the door randomly explode, leaving the Colegmerate, who has taken the forefront of the Pro-Zero forces, eyeing up all of you before settling on Richard.
Godmodder477: She only sent one of you? Against me?
Colegmerate: The others are busy with their jobs within Godmodding incorporated. I was the only one immediately available.
Godmodder477: Is she seriously underestimating me that badly!? You hardly look like a Terror!
Colegmerate: You aren’t very much at all yourself, Tuba Boy, no matter how threatening you look.
Godmodder477: AUGH! Why do you keep calling me that! I was there for the Psi Godmodding wars, I helped code-
Colegmerate: Your achievements blind you to your shortcomings, you brat.
Colegmerate: You have driven yourself to the unreasonable standard of infalliability.
Colegmerate: My mother and employer would take weakness and purge it with a ruthlessness, whist you will simply deny it at every opportunity and cite your past.
Colegmerate: You will, of course, simply forget these words by the time it has lead to your downfall.
A moment of silence occurs. Richard actually looks a bit startled by that one, but quickly shakes his head.
Godmodder477: I’m citing my past to prove that my potential is infinite!
Godmodder477: You people keep putting me down as some piece of trash who was just ‘lucky’ to get my powers!
Godmodder477: Heads up, punks!
Godmodder477: I am a silent millionaire, a master investor!
Godmodder477: I game on a professional level!
Godmodder477: I have made more games than you’ll even know I’ve been in!
Godmodder477: I aced classes! I was a star on every sports team i joined!
Godmodder477: And that was all BEFORE I got to work with Notch, before I got to see Psi and gain my powers! You think I’m just some privileged punk because I grew up rich, but I have worked for everything I have! Do you think I’d stay rich if I didn’t do something about it?!
Godmodder477: I have drive, potential, intelligence, strength, charm, resources, EVERYTHING!
Godmodder477: I’m here to prove that you can’t top me! I’m the best human being alive! And all I have to do is kill her ONCE!
Godmodder477: Sure, things went south, but if I kill her now, that basically means she has no right to be the Omega-Plus Godmodder, and that means we’ll all know who’s going to win by the time I get to properly challenge her!
Godmodder477: And once that’s done, I’ll be the king! The BEST! The Ultimatum! Nothing will match me! Nothing will compare! Ever!
Colegmerate: Hrmph. Such bravado. I suppose it’s kept you from melancholy.
Colegmerate: But do not mistake facts for bias, Tuba Boy. Then again, I suppose the time for words is over, lest this just turn into a long argument.
Colegmerate: I am UserZero’s will, her arm. My mother-slash-employer has saw fit to send me to you thus that I aid in killing you. All of you, including you who’d ally themselves against her, and those who would simply cause chaos for their amusement.
Colegmerate: I assure you I will enjoy strangling the life out of all of you!
And after all of that, the Colegmerate starts bulging oddly, his form swelling as if something within wanted out. Anyone who thought to attack him at this point backed well off, sensing danger (and anyone beforehand would find him protected by an aura of Godmodding energy), and that was a very smart move in the end, as the Colegmerate’s form exploded shortly thereafter, releasing a massive smokescreen. Richard quickly pulls out the world’s most massive fan and blows the smoke away to reveal…Oh my.
The Colegmerate that now floats before you now resembles a massive octopus more than any creeper, with eight massive tentacles and a giant spiky maw underneath. Underneath the maw was the broom, now the center of a blinding sphere of electricity, barely contained within its orb-like form. What was more disturbing, however, was the presence of creeper faces and heads, as if the thing was literally made of creepers, stuck together by green flesh and poking out almost everywhere. Worse still, they spoke, and they spoke unified:
COLEGMERATE: CLEANSING TIIIIIIIIIIME!
The lowdown: This is it, the first boss! The Colegmerate is a bit of a doozy, though I’m sure he’s nothing you can’t handle! The Colegmerate has five parts total, but none of them are really mandatory to kill except one: The Brain. The Skull, of course, protects the brain and doesn’t do anything else, so you will have to go through that or find a way around. The Tentacles improve the Colegmerate’s attack power AND prevent you from bodyblocking entities; he’ll just reach over! The Maw and Orb relate to his Acquisition and Power Cleaning specials, but I don’t know what those specials do exactly. Oh, and finally, the third special counts down if the Brain isn’t protected by anything. All things considered that's probably an explosion timer, so I'd kill it quickly when the Brain gets exposed.
Fortunately, you have help! The Terrors, though not full bosses themselves, are still powerful entities that can help you fight this giant Creeper Octopus thing! The Terror Creeper can summon Minicreepers to block attacks and explodes to deal huge damage when on low HP; the Terror Zombie can bodyblock a load of entities and can occasionally inflict Infection, which will cause their attacks to go wild; finally, the Terror Skeleton can attack twice per turn and can give other entities Minicrits!
Terrain: Jungle (+10% Evasion for Grounded units)
Weather: Clear (no effect)
[N] Healing Seaweed: 1/1 HP. Heals 5,000 HP to whoever kills it first.
[N] Virus.DOS.SSR-II: 25,000/25,000 HP.
[AZ] Mango Monster: 50,000/50,000 HP. Deals 1 damage but Heals other entities.
[AZ] Splattershot Inkling: 20,000/20,000 HP.
[AZ] Splat Charger Inkling: 20,000/20,000 HP. Splat Bomb: 3,000/3,000 HP.
[AZ] Balloon Whelp: 1,000,000/1,000,000 HP. Inflation = 100%. At 200% or 0% Inflation it dies instantly. Gains attack at higher inflation, gains evasiveness at lower Inflation. Airborn at 150% Inflation. Helium Breath: [||]
[AZ] Doppleganger: 40,000/40,000 HP. Slightly Evasive.
[AZ] Terror Creeper: 70,000/70,000 HP. Can send Minicreepers to stun others; Explodes when at low life.
[AZ] Terror Zombie: 100,000/100,000 HP. Guarding Doppelganger, Mango Monster and Splat Charger Inkling. Can inflict Infection on attack.
[AZ] Terror Skeleton: 70,000/70,000 HP. Can attack twice; Dead Shuffle: [|||]
[PZ] Beta Phantom: 9,500/40,000 HP.
[PZ] Kanto Starters: 45,000/45,000 HP. Get stronger over time.
[PZ] Johto Starters: 45,000/45,000 HP. Get stronger over time.
[PZ BOSS] The Colegmerate: Brain 80,000/80,000 HP. Skull 150,000/150,000 HP (blocking Brain). Tentacles 10,000/10,000 HP x8. Maw 50,000/50,000 HP. Orb 50,000/50,000 HP. Aquisition: [|||] Power Cleaning: [||||] Echo of Destruction [||] Airborn
[AZ-γ] Godmodder477: 45/50 HP.
[GM] UserZero: 146/150 HP.
Distance to Yggdrasil: 4825.
10/25 Terrible Tastes
5/50 The Myth, The Legend, The Misspelling +2 from Bomber57
Gluegun && Sburb Logo || Rifle = Homestuck 3/3
HOMESTUCK: A green gun emblazoned with the image of the SBURB logo. Shoots massive green explosions of pure energy rather than glue.
A piece of paper with "Godmoder" written on it && Hammer 1/?
+2 Erelye
I point out that the water [REDACTED FOR SAFETY] writing words into action at the moment is horrible with typos and should doublecheck his updates more often. While Tazz is yelling at me to stop calling him that, I take the stick I hit UserZero with out of my inventory.
Golem: Time for the birth of a legendary weapon.
I quickly run up to Pricey, and shiv him in the heart with the stick.
Golem: I don't actually have any grievances with you right now, I just need someone I don't care about enough to do this to.
I then bind a portion of his soul to the stick, and finish creating the ROLEPLAYBLITERATOR.
Golem: ...I probably won't be using this any time soon.
I then put the Roleplaybliterator back into my inventory and instead turn to the Colegmerate.
Golem: Your name sucks and your mother is terrible at basic spelling, god forbid she ever enter a spelling bee.
I then casually boot up CIQ.exe and plug my laptop into the Source Code of Reality.
Golem: Time to test your limits.
Q1. How many holes in a polo? [ONE] [TWO] [FOUR] [TWELVE]
I note that a polo has 4 holes in it, one for the head, 2 for the arms, and one for the rest of the body. To that end, I put the Colegmerate into a polo. However, the Colegmerate has 8 tentacles, and could really use a polo with more holes in it. I shrug, as I can't really do anything about that. However, I come up with a solution! All I have to do is lower the amount of limbs that the Colegmerate has, and then I can totally fit it into the polo! I then start hacking the Colegmerate's tentacles off with a rusty saw, giving it tetanus and causing it incredible pain.
Q2. Can a match box? [No, but a tin can] [Yes] [No] [Yes, one beat Mike Tyson]
I know deep in my heart that puns are always the proper answer, so I select "No, but a tin can." A tin then pops in, and beats up the Colegmerate with its amazing boxing skills.
Q3. .sdrawkcab noitseuq siht rewsnA [K.O] [What?] [I don’t understand] [Tennis Elbow]
I select K.O, and pull out the KO Cannon, hitting the Colegmerate's tentacles with the incredibly painful spring-loaded boxing glove. This pain makes the Colegmerate wish that it could just get beat up by the tin again, so I oblige.
Q4. Click the answer [OUT OF ORDER] [OUT OF ORDER] [OUT OF ORDER] [OUT OF ORDER]
I click the answer. The Colegmerate breathes a sigh of relief since there's clearly no way that I could hurt him with this question, but quickly finds its tentacles getting crushed by an orbital vending machine cannon. The vending machines are all out of order, but I can clearly see the items inside of it. Angered by their inaccessibility, I smash the vending machines open with a crowbar, causing glass to fly everywhere, cutting up the Colegmerate.
Q5. Put your mouse here ->O
I put my mouse on the button, and note that a maze pops up. I realize that there's no way to get to the other side without moving my cursor around the game window, so I do so. Unfortunately, my cursor is somehow connected to the Colegmerate magically, and moving the cursor somehow dragged him straight through several layers of dirt and stone.
I feel like this has satisfactorily damaged the Colegmerate for a single post, so I let up on the assault for now.
Cat drawn by me. Accepting requests, depending on a lot of things. DTG Atsume: http://www.imgur.com/a/tij95
1'-[7']-{'3}-'3-'3 '6-11'-7'-6'-7' '1-{'3}-8'-12'-'3-2'
'10-'5-'8-'11 1'-[7']-8'-7'-'3 '2-11'-2'-'9-7'
'10-'5-'3-'3 1'-[7']-'3 '10-8'-{'3}-['10]-4'-7'
'10-{'3}-'3-'3-'6-8'-4' {'3}-11'-2'-'9-7'
Spam restoration: http://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/forums/forum-discussion-info/2195940-posts-threads-deleted-because-of-spam-filter-place
Official DTG Cards Against Humanity suggestion pad: http://piratepad.net/DTGCAH
Going up into the thermosphere, I think to myself,
“Just who does she think I am? Does she think I am a punching bag? Seriously, she took 2 damage from a plain stick, and she’s trying to judge me? I must thank her, though. Minecraftia looks lovely from up here. But this view cannot last, and what goes up…”I begin to fall, picking up more and more speed. Normally, I’d reach terminal velocity, but Minecraft physics are not real world physics, so I continue to speed up. Eventually, I break the sound barrier, creating a large explosion up in the Mesosphere. As I reach the Troposphere, over 10 miles above Minecraft, I’ve reached Mach 4, meaning that I will land back on the battlefield in about 10 seconds. My clothes by now would have burnt off, but mine are fireproof. And waterproof. And explosionproof. That doesn’t mean that I am not currently engulfed in flames twice my size. I aim myself at the small city that was the hammer I was smacked with, though I prepare to change my direction. And I do! As soon as I see User Zero, or rather, the tiny speck that is in the middle of the raging battle, I steer myself towards her. I hold my fist out, while falling, and prepare to punch the top of her head at about 3400 miles per hour. While engulfed in flames. The flames coalesce into a custom enchantment: Armor Piercing I. This enchantment ignores armor, including armor enchantments, when calculating things such as damage. It is I, like infinity I, because I level means that all armor effects are ignored. The fist is travelling so fast that even the air around it is feeling pain, despite it being physically impossible for it to feel pain in the first place.
Anyone who looks up can see a slowly growing body. It starts as an orange speck, and then becomes slightly larger. I quickly cast illusory magic that makes me disappear from human sight (or sight in general. Basically, I am no longer reflecting light; it just passes through me).
I say something.
Before anyone can hear what I just said, as I am moving much faster than the speed of sound, my enchanted fist makes contact with UserZero. Accompanying the contact is a loud BOOM that takes place a couple of minutes later, as the sounds from my breaking the sound barrier finally reach the battlefield. This is followed by my voice:
“UserZero! You failed physics, didn’t you? What goes up, must come DOWN ON YOUR SKULL!”If this cannot target UserZero/she avoids it because she just summoned a boss, then this entire attack hits the Colegmerate's skull, and sends concussive shockwaves into the brain. Though I still do taunt UserZero.
+2 Cobalt
10/20 Maine Cannon
8/25 Elizabeth
A blue door appears out of thin air, and opens. Out walks a teenage girl in blue attire, holding a large book with a whimsical smile on her face. You, the audience, do not know whether to focus on that, her piercing golden eyes, or the GIGANTIC MONSTER standing 50 feet from us. I, since I know what I am going to write, walk up to the girl.
I start the conversation:
“You’re late. Erebus has already resurrected.”“I know, but I had somewhere I needed to be. And you are…”
“Elizabeth, I’ve talked to you before. Remember the job I spoke about? Well, I have the perfect place for you to be.”“You said that you could take me to a place where the power gathering would make the P-1 Climax look like a candle next to the sun.”
“I know, I know. But before we go, do you want to take out the trash, or shall I?”The whimsical look on her face hardens. “Erebus is my burden to bear. I took it in his place,” staring at the golden gates, “and I will hold to that promise!”
No matter who wins, this can't end well...people like you should be burning in...you know, that place.
As usual, the only way to end a war for good is to discover its beginning...and end that beginning.
So, Uzi. Sorry to let you know, but this is as far as you go.
"lol ur stooped im God."
"Actually, as the omnipotent creator of this universe, I think I fit the bill more than some bearded guy who can't escape from some rope."
I copy the design of my original trap (the one with leaves and spikes) and dig several of copies across the field. I then grab a set of smoke bombs and begin throwing them around the throughout the battlefield.
And now, for alchemies!
Orb of the Sun && Orb of the Moon = ??? (1/?)
Betty Crocker Fruit Gushers && Can of Shaving Cream = Betty Crocker Barbasol Bomb (1/?)
3/5 Golden Deer.
6/25 Queen Ant. (+1 from Talist, +1 from Ire)
+1 to Ire, +1 to Generic/
I'm out of my mind. Please leave a message.
"The sun never sets on those who ride into it." - The Narrator