=TURN TWENTY-SEVEN=
Numbersoup loots the cage, and realizes that the Altar could totally be looted if she felt like it. Pit then joins the massive spider battle at The Web! Engie then picks up the Memory Orb, and gets another vision!

///
Chaos appears to be standing on the island that lies at the center of the Dreamscape, atop the mountain's peak. As he fiddles with a Memory Orb, a figure suddenly appears next to him.

cc: oh god wha(t)
cc: who (t)he gorilla are you?
??: Hello.
??: I believe we share the same ideals.
??: We're alike, you and me.
??: And as I know, you're going to trap several Descendants in your Dreamscape.
??: You could use my help.

The figure suddenly manipulates the very stone of the mountain Chaos is standing on, crafting himself the body of a gargoyle.

cc: ...
cc: (t)his would normally be (t)he poin(t) i'd a(t)(t)emp(t) dismembermen(t)
cc: bu(t) (t)his in(t)rigues me.
cc: espe©ially wit(h) how you go(t) here.
cc: go on.

The memory fades out...
///

Engie stows away the Memory Orb. He then searches the Shack for the wheels of the awesome office chair, but only finds pieces of cut-up construction paper. Hm. Wilson then also joins the fray at the Web. Elsewhere, Willow enscribes some glyphs on the grave. Willow feels a strange sense of calm come over her. She then joins the battle along with Wilson!

=ENDLESS DESERT=
The Gold Vein then tells Piono that if it does want anything, it wants more Gold. All the other Gold Veins have more gold than him, and it feels weird. Piono then takes (5) damage from the Gold Nuggets, due to attempting to dodge in the same way! However, it seems to be pacified that someone actually talked to it; the option to SPARE is now unlocked!

=BATTLE: INSIDE TREE TURN SIX=
Tazz is near-death again, and the Crimson Scale will pop soon! Now is the time to panic. Thankfully, Piono's grenade should make your lives very, very easy.

=BATTLE: THE SPIDER HORDE TURN ONE=
"Ouch" is all I can say about Redstone's situation. However, there's still hope for him! He just needs to run. Really fast. Two of the spiders are near death now; kill those first then take down the bigger threats!

Do note I'll always announce when Endless Desert updates happen, besides tiny things, like the Gold Vein battle.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 02:46:00

Oh cool, we CAN steal the altar. I say we do that and then use it as an anvil against the Sleuth, just to add insult to injury.

Anyways, for my action, since I'm not going to get to see the rest until next round, I drop a grenade square on the scale beast, killing both the sap mortar and the crimson scale, and, surprisingly enough, the scale beast too. Didn't think it would go down that easy.

Anyways, tazz, darkside, you two can handle the tree guard and remaining sap mortar no problem, right?

Anyways, I'm putting myself into auto-pilot for the round after me getting a TRIPLE KILL. If I don't say otherwise within the time parameters, My character will cast heal on tazz if he's still in range, and walk over and collect the splinters. If tazz wasn't in range, I'll reload.

And don't worry guys fighting off seven spiders, if you guys can't handle that yourselves, tazz, darkside and me might be able to come help out.
Although, honestly, spiders are weak enough you guys should be capable of winning that fight with some clever use of the items.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 03:12:00

I put gold back onto the altar. Man, that's so rude. I also SPARE the Gold Vein.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 03:57:00

OK, wow, dead again. Lucky scale and it's lucky 10 damage roll...

As Piono probably killed everything with the blast, I apply Enchant Weapon to Darkside and just stay back into the Fortified Square at G2 to keep safe-ish. HOWEVER, if the Scale Beast somehow applied a CLUTCH DODGE to a freaking grenade blast, I fire at the Scale Beast instead to hopefully kill it, and then head back to G2 to keep safe-ish.

I also attempt to sell Temmie the Iron Plating, the Aura of Regen, and the Twin Pistols (all are basic stuff).

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 04:19:00

I shall be taking those cut-up bits of construction paper, and seeing what's down the trapdoor... and throwing the bed down there for safety reasons if I see something that looks like an enemy.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 04:40:00

I use heal on myself. I move to G7 and attack the Glitch Spider next to me. End.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 05:22:00

I head north and join the battle there, spawning at F9.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 13:07:00

I move to (H7), and enter a defensive stance if the Scale Beast is dead. If it dodged both Tazz's and Piono's attacks, I move to (E4) and guarantee the kill with my axe's Finisher skill (if possible).

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 15:36:00

"Pit" simply watches as all the spiders attack one of his allies. Shame he can't really help him out right now.

Okay then, i'll move over to...F8... and take down the spider that went and attacked me.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 16:34:00

>DEPLOYING RULES PATCH 0.7...

>New mechanics!
-Guarding. Restores 20% of HP and MP, rounded up, and grants +1 AC for the turn. Acts as if you used an attack / weapon skill / spell.
-Critical Hits. 1 / 20 chance for a mini-crit for 1.5x damage; 1 / 100 chance for a crit for 2x damage.

>Balance changes!
-Rapier got +1 lower damage limit.
-Spear got +1 lower damage limit.
-Grenade's mechanic changed; splash is now half of the damage you dealt, rounded up.
-Grenade also got +1 upper damage limit.
-Guardian got +1 Duration.
-Thunderburst got +1 upper damage limit.
-Summon rules changed slightly. Talist may want to check this out.

>Bug fixes!
-Fixed the bug where Glitch Temmie could TPK everyone instantly in Zone 3.
-Fixed the bug where saying "egassem sdrawkcab" would summon Bill to the battlefield.
-Fixed the bug where the Rapier could be chained infinitely in a combo attack.
-Removed Flowey the Flower, and fixed a game crash.
-Removed Herobrine.

...

=TURN THIRTY MINUS TWO=
Insert plants the 2 Gold back next to the Altar. He feels a sense of calm wash over him... Then, Engie loots the bits of construction paper (which appear to be Temmie Flakes) and takes a look down the Trapdoor. He then sees movement, and promptly chucks the bed down the trapdoor, dealing (3) damage to Totem Guardian 1!

...weird. It seems that a bunch of Totem Golems or something of the sort are present in the basement. Numbersoup then joins the battle at the Spider's Web!

=ENDLESS DESERT=
Insert Spares the Gold Vein, gaining 0 Skill Points and 2 Gold. Tazz then sells the Twin Pistols, Iron Plating and the Aura of Regen to Temmie for 2 Gold Total. Temmie is being cheap today, but hey you got those pieces of equipment for free.

=BATTLE: INSIDE TREE TURN SEVEN=
The Crimson Scale, Scale Beast and one of the Sap Mortars were wiped with a single grenade! Time to wipe up the rest of them. If you're reckless though, you may experience some high amounts of pain.

=BATTLE: THE SPIDER HORDE TURN TWO=
Redstone narrowly lived, but Willow was desummoned by a mini-crit, and poison. Ouch. Now that Willow's off the field, you may want to consider taking a look at the new summon creature stats.

Originally posted on 2015-10-25 16:38:00

I find the Cipher Shop Coupon at the edge of the Endless Desert, and immediately trade that in for the Shuriken Stack. I feel a Respec is coming to make the most of this new weapon, but not right now.

I'll slip to F7 and do the Guarding thing as well to get some HP back. Now, guys, I'd like to start getting payoffs with the thief's dagger, meaning I should probably kill that Tree Guardian if at all possible. DarkSide can obliterate the Sap Mortar and make life easier, but we still need it dead.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 04:46:00

Actually, I say we shoud let you get the kill on the sap mortar, since the sap mortar does less damage and is all around a lesser threat.
And also likely to be an easy target after my next attack.

I reload, and realize with great dissatisfaction that I cannot, in fact, reach those splinters. Oh well, its not like we can't just loot the entire room once the enemies are dead.
Darkside, you run up and bash the tree guard over the head with your axe. Next round I'll post that my action will take place after yours and you move away from the blast radius while I plug the tree guard with the last damage and weakening the sap mortar enough for tazz to just run over and stab the sap mortar with his shank.

Also, I just realized. I dodged an AoE attack from that first sap mortar two rounds ago. Looks like my CLUTCH DODGES M8 are still in effect.

Also, according to the secret desert, the Bill Cipher in the top left corner's eye has meaning.

If it turns red, something bad is about to happen. If it turns blue, there are secrets waiting on other pages than the endless desert. If it turns yellow, check the shop for a message from Bill.


In easter egg news, Ire has not yet gotten around to updating the number of scales we've killed.
In the Character Creation screen: "He's keeping track of your sins. Tread lightly." Were it not for the fact that I'm looking forward to a more difficult boss fight (which potentially means better lute) I'd be kind of worried.
We have a Glitch Temmie invading the bottom right corner of our inventory. I'll probably do something ridiculous when I decide to fight it.
Bill has has added "augmentation" as a spell to his store's stock. I might buy that and switch out enchant weapon for it.
In Zone 1 page: "A broken purple disc. P e r h a p s y o u s h o u l d t a k e a l o o k ." I take a look.

"When judgment falls. Bad Teams: Redstone. Good Teams: IGU and Talist." Redstone, how about you be the one to steal the defiled altar, since, you know, you're already on his bad side?

That's all folks!

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 10:24:00

I don't work well when paired with IGU? Eh?

Willow moves down to F7 and uses her dragon's breath/burst attack on square F4, hitting all but one of the spiders.

Then Wilson uses foxfire. If spider 4 is not dead yet, he fires one of the blasts at that and the other at spider 3. If spider 4 is dead, then he uses both on spider 3. Either way, one of the blasts on spider 3 uses Kaze (push) to try and shove it into the wall. Or D4 if that doesn't work.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 12:06:00

(piono)
(piono those were r's not a's)
(bad terms)

Anyway, counted Talist's post. Update's actually done now.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 14:33:00

I sell the Temmie Flakes and a Potion(or however many I need to get 2 gold) and then buy Temmie college.
I then walk into the Web, spawning in at E10 and Wide Beaming everything above me.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 15:28:00

I move to (I8), and prepare to chop down the Tree Guard.

HYAA!

(I would laugh if this ended up with a (mini)crit...)

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 16:12:00

I have an idea... and promptly try using the glow of the memory orb to light up the down-the-trapdoor-area, taking a potshot at one of the totem guardians if possible since they seem to take damage. Only problem is that if I don't go in proper, it doesn't seem to let me see their stats.

Also of note is that my original plan of saving up skillpoints to put +1 into STR then swapping my hat out for a drone dome is no longer going to be all that beneficial to me. Not yet.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 18:30:00

Move to H7, attack at H6.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 21:51:00

I'm feeling sick today; no update, sorry.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 21:52:00

Wow, that really did a number on him. Better help him out.

Move over to G8 and use the Guardian Spell to help protect everyone.
If possible in one turn, also attack the Glitch Cave Spider at E6.

Originally posted on 2015-10-26 22:28:00