Secrets time!

I have the weirdest craving for Banana Bread right now.

This is the third patch of gold on this version of the Endless Desert.
You get 1 Gold.

((I found a slot machine at DE 573. I stick in 1 gold, since why not?))

((I found Phantasm's Rift by the way. Is that gonna suck Aaron in now or what? Weird story, I tried to interact with it and it broke, so there ya go.))

((I added a comment that says the numbers I marked as resolved because it looked like everyone had forgotten about them. Sorry ire.))

A blank canvas. And a fresh new piece of gold!

There is no second patch of gold.

IN THIS WORLD, THERE'S STILL NOTHING IN THE CORNER.

Originally posted on 2016-01-23 22:17:00

((And the phantasm stage was completed.

I would honestly be surprised if, after this, the boss of that actually doesn't become a bonus boss here just from sheer difficulty.

Like wow that was hard.))

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 00:11:00

=TURN SEVENTY-FIVE=

-14- Turns until Temmie drops tem's mixtape (hey if you want to be funny and put messages here, PM me.)

Numbersoup first learns Aurora Heal (feel free to change it later), while Insert learns Genesis! Genesis is basically unchanged, but takes lots of SP, which is kinda huge especially given that you can't charge it with damage. Luckily, casting spells grants 5 SP to it, so...

Toast leaves her current fight via vent, then tosses down a Tem Coffin through the vents. This spooks Glitch Temmie, and also adds +10% to tem's Emotion Meter. She also finds 1 Gold within the forum's "subtitle". Piono then reinforces that one unstable looking chair with 2 vines. Darkside then downs a HP Potion, almost fully healing himself and emptying the group potion supply, which is a bit dangerous. Darkside stands on guard, and listens around for stuff. Gladius joins him in doing this.

Piono then loots the Memory Orb. And then something bad happens. Two figures instantly warp in through purple rifts and barge through the house. They look nearly identical in size and shape, and it seems that they're based off of those two strange misfits you saw before; The Failure and the Mistake. The house collapses despite Piono's best efforts, and the three are now caught in a possibly deadly fight.

S T R I F E !

Insert then buys Maggy's Bow, and proceeds to craft ???'s Bow. Wilson also leaves the fight he's in, and leaves the Glitch Endo's there as a parting gift. Darkside drops his AGI and MP by 1 to get enough skill points to increase his SPC to 4! This makes his special actually pretty awesome. Teag and Numbersoup then both level up their SPC by 1. I then fix an error in Piono's statkeeping, then let him increase his INT by 2 by dropping his HP. He also equips the spare HP Orb. Redstone then checks an Alchemy to end this part of the update.

ALCHEMITER:
Twin Pistols && Bayonets = Joy (lvl 3) (Cost: 35 Grist)

=ENDLESS DESERT=
To begin, Piono loots 2 gold, then slams 1 of said Golds into the Slot Machine, to see what happens.
(Chair) (Gold) (Accessory)
Nothing happens, and Piono fails to be sucked into the Phantasm's Rift.

=BATTLE: THE TEMMIE WORKSHIP, TURN FIVE=
Teag received the legendary 0.05% Chance to receive both a Crit and a Minicrit in the same turn. Needless to say, he died. Temmie's up to 2 / 7 souls now, so take care; don't lose more souls to Tem! You NEED to spare or kill Glitch Temmie now; make tem feel super emotional or something, or make tem lose trust in Chaos! Whatever you find easier! John Cena also appeared for Engie; that'll be handy, probably.

=BATTLE: THE MAKESHIFT SHACK, TURN ZERO=
Uh, don't die. Listen to Darkside; he has a pretty good grasp on how to not-die.

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 02:01:00

@insert Bill's cane has been changed if you've noticed. I reckon it seems pretty solid.

Impressive on the decoding, teag.

Toast busts through the nothing and spawns in at G2. She moves to H4 and uses Shifting Sands on the Corruption. Afterwards, she uses Augument on herself and sits tight.

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 03:07:00

IM SO SMRT
I first tried the decoding.
A-HEM:
Chaos Log 8:
cc: Every single failure that he's created. They're all coming back to haunt me.cc: Was it worth it, Creator?cc: They all want to go back. They want to rejoin with the whole.cc: It's hardly a surprise my ancestor tried to kill me that day...cc: He wants it back. The part of his soul, contained in me.cc: If you can read this...cc: The 0rigin. The Failure. The Mistake. The Error. The Corruption. The Broken. The Glitched. The Forsaken. The Heartless. The Abandoned. That One That Got Stuck In The Security System One Time And Was A Serious Pain To Remove. The Deleted. The Shattered.cc: They're all coming for you, guided by rage and despair. Don't hesitate to destroy them; their ability to reason is long gone...

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 03:17:00

Alright, so method of approach:
Whittle both foes down to low HP, and then burst them when they get low enough for us to murder them in a single burst. NEITHER OF US want to activate that last passive of theirs.
Don't get too close to them either. As we all know, damage adds up given enough time.
And do not get between the two, or go where the crosses intersect. No matter what.
I'd recommend poking movements for these two, as well as higher ranged weaponry, for this fight, if available.

Assuming Toast barged into the Shack, I move to (G4), hit the Corrupt, and retreat to (F4).
-----
Meanwhile, with my split soul still in the Tem Battle...
Tem begins to feel powerful hallucinations thanks to my soul, split between the 1 part (the absorbed bit) and 1/2 part (the part currently still with me), making tem question if tem was really doing the right thing here.
A very real-looking hallucination of myself appears before tem, moving wherever tem looks.

Tem, please...
I feel as if I should tell you something.
There's a fine line between provoking a fight and self-defense.
You really haven't been walking that line very well.
And look what's happening to everyone.
Only a select few of us mindlessly provoke fights. Most of us just do it as self-defense.
Some of us even try a more diplomatic option before trying to go all in.
And we even put you through college.
The tems that... ugh... used to follow your footsteps likely would have preferred for you to try some form of diplomatic approach, anyway.
If they looked past repaying Chaos, and into what they were born to do.
So...
Look into your own heart and soul...
Is this murdering business really what you want to be doing?
Because, honestly, all of us wouldn't be better off for it.
And, honestly, I'm also kind of sad that all these innocents died...
*sniff*
Yes... I know that your fellow tems were innocent...
So please... just... stop fighting. And we'll consequently also stop fighting.
I guarantee it.

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 04:29:00

Wait... but I already went to the makeshift shack. FINE! I suppose you don't need me.

G.Temmie probably already hates us, so maybe it's time to weaponize snarkiness. ... Huh... I wonder if this came around from all the talking I did about a Might-Mind-Heart triad. Mind is better than Might. Usually.

Also, I'm glad that you're afraid, Ire. That's the only thing that inspires me to constantly think up of new, complicated gimmicks; the fear from people reading them. It nourishes my soul. Or something.

...

Notch freakin dangit. Now there are expectations. DTG is really taxing my idea generation around now...

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 06:26:00

((okay, since one of our members just got effectively a text message from the Random Luck Goddess with an ASCII middle finger and text saying "**** YOU", we seriously need to consider putting a strategy together. Right now.

thankfully, my master build involves temmie armor, so maybe we could find some way to abuse that to our advantage here.))

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 06:46:00

@Talist: Ah, whoops. Want to be added to the battle? That's fine if you want it.
(feel the pressureeeee)

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 07:04:00

Hmm. I suspect that rocket launcher is giving us a load of problems. It needs to die. I head to F8, take aim at the tile K6, and fire, as JOHN CENA heads over to E7.

Gentlemen, some Zone Of Control cover would be appreciated to keep the Sabers off of me.

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 11:42:00

I guard

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 16:50:00

I cast Revive on myself, then dismantle the Mage Robe Parachute and turn it into a really long rope, which I tie to the most stable piece of geography nearby and use to swing down to the gold vein. I also put up a flimsy barrier of Mage Robes on the side of our stairway/fence.

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 17:42:00

Well.
Crap.
That's all I have to say.

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 17:59:00

Oh F-gorilla I was targeted! I Move to E7 then i Guard. and i will make a Deal with the God of Bad Time Sans before making Telekinetic Bad Time.

Special Status:

Originally posted on 2016-01-24 22:03:00

For the time being, Wilson will take the Ascendant special. Of course, I'm going to want to make a better one.

Anyway, after leaving for a WHOLE TURN, Wilson returns to the Glitch Temmie fight. Let's try this. Wilson spawns at B5, Willow takes B8.

Wilson uses foxfire. Once to heal Pricey for 7-9, once to apply wet to Tazz for 2 turns (3 heal currently). Holding 8 gold of our 9 gold, Willow moves to E10 and addresses Glitch Temmie.

Hey, I'm not sure what your name is, but now people on both sides of this fight have died. So we need to do something else. First, I need to notify you if that lovely picture is shaking, which it is. It might fall off. Second...

She shows Glitch Temmie the eight gold.

I'd like to buy that armor please. Pretty please? Pretty please with cherries? We can just take a more peaceful action now...

It occurs to me that this is the first time I've tried to spend the party's gold.

G. Endo 1 moves to H5 and guards. G. Endo 2 moves to H7 and guards.

Hm... should I make a more serious special that really fits Wilson? Or should I make a silly one that fits the summoner archtype?

Originally posted on 2016-01-25 00:19:00

My absorbed SOUL says "Hey you tem, could you stop fighting? I mean, if you're angry at us, I think what you did to my body (gestures toward bloody mess sitting on the ground) should have been enough..."

Originally posted on 2016-01-25 01:10:00

"Temmie, just, STOP! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO GAIN FROM THIS ANYMORE?! REVENGE IS POINTLESS, ABSOLUTELY POINTLESS!! STOP, PLEASE!!!"

I rush up to the H6, and then use a Scroll of Ice Pillar. As I get a +2 INT to use the Scroll, this means I have 4 INT, which means it spawns 3 Pillars that last for 3 turns total. I use this to make walls at H5, H7 and I9. Request granted, Engie. I then retreat to F7.

Originally posted on 2016-01-25 04:44:00

Do you mind if I actually just go for Shadowstep on the page earlier? That just seems sick af (nerf the base multiplier to 0.5 since I have a reload weapon).

/nullish?

EDIT: Maybe nerf the gains/SP cost too, EDIT2: because it's fun (if a little strong) against groups of enemies. Based of Katarina from LoL. Just look up any 'Kat penta montage'.

Originally posted on 2016-01-25 06:18:00

"Look at this. LOOK AT THIS. WHAT ARE WE DOING? WE'RE JUST THROWING A FIGHT OVER A STUPID ROCKET LAUNCHER THAT'S HARDLY BEEN FOCUSED ON.

I never wanted to pick a fight with everything that comes up when I just move around. Except you, and every other thing in this living hell, are! And now I have to fight for my life again because all of you are trying to kill me. Why does this have to keep happening, and why does everything have to be so hostile around here?

WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS FIGHT, EVEN? All I did was panic because that rocket launcher was pretty much a direct threat to me, and Tazz tried to attack you, which probably wouldn't have hurt much. Is this enough of a reason to wage war on every single person here, and kill two people completely unrelated to us?

IS IT?"

"And that Failure has to die. It's going to cause too much of a problem."

MOVE: G3
ATTACK: Failure

MOVE: G5
ATTACK: WINDFORCE on Failure

Originally posted on 2016-01-25 16:57:00

Okay, I checked the file separately while I was at school, and pretty much came to the same conclusions as you darkside. Hey, great minds think alike.
@talist: Do both at the same time. One that fits wilson, but is also kinda silly and fits the summoner archetype. Make it work, the dumber the better. Also, my good computer is currently busted, so the video might not go up until tomorrow, but I'll try and do it tonight if I can.

"Gladius! Switch to mace mode, if these things aren't elites we can mess with their patterns and keep down damage. Don't bother with your summons, those aren't going to help use much here. We need to try and keep our damage balanced between the two so we can down them simultaneously.
Darkside, remember to say things out loud, the... NPCs isn't the right word for it... whatever, our allies can't read the group chat, so they need to be told stuff IRL, or as close to that as we are right now."
Aaron then has a quick internal discussion on the merits of the fact that they are, in fact, having a discussion on the group memo within the 'board game' that exists as an abstraction of Chaos's mind, within his mind.
he then moves to D5, and switches to mace form.

Hey, ire, not that it's going to change which weapon I use, but do these two counts as elites?

Originally posted on 2016-01-25 23:49:00