Godcraft, Far Lands: "So, what've we got?"
"ELITE SOLDIER. GOES BY THE NAME AUDIE. I SWEAR I JUST TOLD YOU THIS."
"...Huh. So you did. Dammit, a single elite won't change the tide of battle. Our forces are barely scratching them!"
"RELAX. WE'VE GOT AIR SUPPORT COMING UP SOON THAT CAN COMBAT THE MANTISES."
"They'd better be soon. Make sure they bring the heavy weaponry."
Current forces:
Engietech Soldiers: 500/500 (X550)
Audie, Elite Soldier: 50000/50000 (X1) (Elite)
Engietech Technicians: 100/100 (X750) (Have you noticed that these guys are always increasing their numbers by 250 each turn, while the other troops are becoming more plentiful per reinforcements as time passes?)
Engietech Pyromaniacs: 750/750 (X225)
Engietech Minions: 500/500 (X200) (These guys only appear in reinforcements around every 2 or 3 waves or so, just letting you know now)
"WE SEEM TO HAVE TOO MANY TECHNICIANS. NONE OF OUR ARMY IS GETTING TARGETED."
"We're gonna need them when we eventually DO get targeted. Especially later on, once we have non-elite troops that have decent sized health bars."
"POINT TAKEN. HOPEFULLY YOU GET TO ROLL OUT MORE ELITES BEFORE THE VORD ALL DIE, I TAKE IT?"
"Hopefully. I like watching my elites kill things."
I refill the sacred items a bit, then try using COMBAT OPERANDI: CONSUME, targeting the Vord Bulks. If I do manage to pull it off, to quote that one guy from the Austin Powers series, "I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain! Get in my belly!"
UGH... STILL DIRECTING TROOPS.
Pausing mid-battle, as if contemplating something, my drone pulls out a phone, dials Blue's number, and asks "Hey, there's an Earth holiday called Valentine's Day. Is there some sort of variant of that in your universe, like the whole Christmas/Humanity Day thing?"
Space: "Hmm. So, evidently, this is not something you want to take me into if it looks like I could just fly away. I see how it is."
This time around, I don't bother breaking the Bedrock cage, curious to see where the ship is trying to take me and knowing that continuing to break the Bedrock would only cause it to take longer to get there.
Battlefield:
Vriska nods to Kalare in recognition. She's a bit too occupied with killing vord to type a response though.
Suddenly, there is a loud cacophony. Lightning, explosions, fire.
One of the republic battleships drops out of the sky. This lands on the croach and explodes, dealing some damage to it.
But the one who downed it might be a bit of a problem. YOU!!!
Hello again Eric. I'll kill you!!!
Eric's eyes burn with rage.
The first time anyone has actually seen him openly angry.
And he is terrifying.
Golden energy and runes spiral around his form.
A tornado of golden words that no one can read.
And a man angered beyond belief.
I'd like to see you try.
Piono hovers in the air, holding Ircucvci.
He no longer goes unarmored, he wears Denito Surrexit and Maleficis Est around his neck, and Nocte Consumens on his left arm. He alos wears Exedo, Mens Potentiam and Traho. Death
Piono deflects the curse with his sword.
Do you think that's going to stop me? Strength of the Titans Upon Angels wings. Demonic Rage wrath oF THe gods Smite ThE wicked.
Piono stops and blinks. gorilla.
You've been prepping for this longer than I expected. You bet I have you little jerk.
Now that is probably the worst thing you've ever said to me.
Eric snarls and launches himself at piono. There is a massive blast of golden light as Eric brings his blade down.
Piono has blocked the blow with Ircucvci.
He grins wickedly at Eric.
Surprise. This trick won't keep you alive forever.
I never thought it would.
Eric swings broken anachronism about again.
Piono blocks.
Again.
Blocked.
Eric snarls again. Time stream. Unforgiving barrage.
You really are pulling out all the stops, aren't you?
Eric growls again and suddenly he becomes a blur, his rune-empowered strikes falling again and again, faster than the eye can track, and every time, Ircucvci is in the way, blocking the strike. How... Are... You...
Piono catches broken anachronism, and plants a kick on Eric's chest that launches him backwards in the air.
Trade secret.
Eric is practically red with rage by this point. Storm of steel Physical hurricane cursed Inferno abyssal Depths Bones of Mother earth
Eric is suddenly surrounded by a glow of elemental energies of various kinds, and streaks towards piono once more.
Piono cackles.
Suddenly, in his off hand is Deum Lucem.
Allow me to show you another of my new tricks.
He holds it up, and as the energies of the gauntlet of darkness and mace of light flow forwards, they mix and intertwine.
A few inches in front of piono the mix of light and shadow stops flat, as if hitting a wall, and spirals out in an intricate array of immense complexity. It grows and grows, the shadow and light splaying out in a massive pattern almost five feet in either direction in the few seconds it takes for Eric to close the gap between him and piono.
I am your lesser no more.
Piono surges forward, driving Ircucvci through the array he has created, the energies curling around his blade as he swings it to meet Eric's blow.
There is a massive explosion of mixed light and darkness...
And Eric slams into the ground. In his hand, the shattered hilt of Broken Anachronism. The shards of the blade rain down around him, glowing and leaving behind wisps of dark shadows.
Eric struggles to his feet. How did you...
I've learned a few things.
I decided to accept my destiny.
Although it seems you have yet to accept yours.
Piono rushes forward with Ircucvci, temporal dislocation
Eric is suddenly gone, and then not gone, and all over the place.
He shifts quickly between many different positions.
Oh, wonderful, you still have that stupid thing in your book.
Eric ignores piono, and instead begins an incantation. Upon the course that once was laid
What? A villain's hand must now be stayed
Oh for the love of... And long ago a gift I gave
You have got to be kidding me. The moment comes to be repaid
He still has this? A final moment comes to fight
Even after I had TWELVE different universes he was staying in blown up!? I now request a guiding light
Why!? Did he actually think I could beat him like this? oN my own i can't set right
Obviously not, otherwise he would've had some half-decent combat spells prepped... this story's true course from this blight
But this... How could he still have a Verse available? to my side you now must fly
At least he knows not to use a Ballad... answer please my desperate cry
Oh for the love of... friend from place beyond the sky
Just shut up already. I call upon thee... Je- Piono smashes his fist into Eric, Eric's form wavers, with a look of shock, and then Eric flies into the air, a massive burst of golden runes explodes outwards, and then dissipates without doing anything. What!? How did you...
Reality magic baby!
Not just good for passive defense buffs,
Turns out I can trash your rune castings with it too! I... I kept that saved for...
Yeah yeah, we get it.
And as much as I'd love to put you, Erelye, and every freaking other pain in my backside out of my misery, I really have to keep you from destroying my vord swarm. You unleashed the vord?! How stupid are you?!
Its been working so far hasn't it?
And I, unlike those here in Godcraft, have a way to exterminate them should they get out of hand.
So I'm going to make sure I don't lose any more of my assets here.
And kill every single one of you that the Vord can't.
Piono ascends up into the air.
Heh.
He unleashes a massive blast of flame that rolls over the non-vord forces on the ground, costing several players and many clone troopers their lives.
Piono is now added to the battlefield. I will respond to attacks from him. He has 20 health. Just to assuage your fears out-of-game, he won't be respawning. In-game you guys don't know that though.
Wow, they're not dead yet? Must be the pity of the Game Master, as they were weaker than my Warriors.
Well, he shouldn't have mercy.
Also, Twin? If you could actually keep note of how much damage entities did consistently, (e.g. my Field Agents having specialized damage), it would be great.
I send out a new player, GreatGeneral731, to defend the Preston Cole. His special ability is Tempered Rage, which gives nearby teammates and himself mini-crits and a 40% damage resistance for the turn and the turn following.
Hmm... something seems odd about that player. He seems to be from my universe... That's right! He's one of the professional Warriors running around.
It seems as if he's a high-ranking Swordsman, at least higher than me.
> Alchemies
Scribe's Wands && LED board running Conway's Game of Life = Life's Wands (4/7)
V-Cube 8 && (Curta Calculator && KNT-308 Sniper Rifle) = CTA-8 (5/9)
Potion of Panacea O0O Glowstone Dust = Potion of Panacea II (1/?)
Potion of Panacea count: 3
> Action: Detailed Process of Cubing
I drink a Potion of Panacea.
I then pull out the Planetcrafter's Speedcube. I first assemble the obsidian center pieces, then complete the opposite side, which for the purposes of this attack is the gabbro face. I then rotate the cube sideways and solve the adjacent basalt and granite centers before moving on to solve the gneiss and sandstone faces using simple commutators. I move on to the edges, solving the first few edges effortlessly as I am a master cuber that would hold all cubing world records if only I could get off my butt and go to a WCA event. Anyway, I then solve the rest of the edges using more commutators I then begin the final stage of the reduction method: solving it.
This is the point where the Grill Gloves come in handy as I solve the cube with the Fridrich method. First off, the cross, which I solve in 0.5 seconds intuitively on the basalt side, as it is not opposite the gneiss side which, when completed, causes it to scramble itself for 50 hours, which I regard as a massive waste of time. I then solve the F2L pairs, which by my great cubing skill has been almost entirely done for me. At this point, the basalt side is completed and it heats up to 1200 degrees Celsius. Luckily, my enchanted Grill Gloves with Fire Resistance XLVII and Heat Shielding XCIX protect me from the heat. Finally, I solve the OLL side in a single algorithm and half the PLL as well, allowing me to solve the obsidian side while ensuring that the PLL is the right permutation. Finally, I almost-solve the cube, holding off on the last U face turn.
Making the final turn and completing the cube without any of the four unsolved sides becoming solved previously, I place the cube down on the ground and telekinetically force the resulting mini-planet to hover five meters above the croach. It proceeds to begin spinning at over 8 meters per second as the process described in Incident 345-1 plays itself out, only scaled up 5/3 times due to the increased size of the cube. The resulting 3.83-meter sphere begins to cool down. I speed up the entire process by originwanding up a x100 speed field that dissipates when the sphere reaches its fully cooled form. This form is with seas of lava, with its land area populated entirely with mountainous areas. I then pull out the Unicoder and enter in "れꠝ𐌅 ᶃラቪꓔꛤ온ࡋ ⽥". Zapping it at the levitating planet, the gravitational field of the planet dissipates and the lava falls straight down, destroying some of the croach. I then write "れꠝ𐌅 🕴 ౺" with the Unicoder and zap it at the planet, which begins to fall. I telekinetically grab the planet and slam it into the croach from low Minecraftian orbit as if it were an asteroid, finishing the attack and damaging much of the croach.
I then realize something: TROLLS!!!!! I rush over to hug Karkat, and he becomes so angry that he spazzes out, straight into the atmosphere! He then proceeds to orbit around the minecraftverse in his spazziness for a while, eventually re-entering the atmosphere and spazzing out right into the Croach!
Orbital Weapons
Mini-Ion Cannon 0/2
Mini-Bio Annihilator 1/4
5/5 For Healing or Building Mechanical Unit
5/5 for Text Based Magic
10/10 x3 TBA'd Attacks
Battlefield:below
Orbital Weapons:
Partial Inventory: Critmist II x47, Ultramarine, Ghosts of War, Gib Armageddon. Potion of Vis x5, The Redstick, Potion of Nectar x28, The Bulletdome, Potion Airdropper
Wilson's Shop: $20
I dupe 3 potion of nectar
+2 to Wilson
-Alchemy Emporium-
Ah, one moment, Wilson...
No, there's no variant of that... Mainly because the holiday goes by the same name.
Do I want to know why you want to know?
-Battlefield-
Red says a spell quietly, and then leaps into the air over dramatically, wand glowing red. He uses the power of three ten posts charges to open a swirling portal, into which nearby vord are sucked into.
I vote for all the players to not use their specials. Is that a thing?
I kill the Croach until it dies. Viral Prototype: 5/7.
HEY, YOU. BLACK TEXT GUY. YOU'RE THE ONE. WHO ARRANGED THAT DREAM THING. RIGHT?
The very same.
WELL, IT CERTAINLY SEEMS. LIKE YOU'VE TAKEN A STARRING POSITION. AS OF NOW. AND I'M THE MAIN CHARACTER IN THESE POSTS. WHATEVER THAT MEANS. SO LISTEN UP. YOU ARE GOING TO LEAVE. OR. YOU ARE GOING TO DIE.
I should warn you that I don't possess the same... let's call it morality as Build. You won't find me yielding to you. I will accomplish whatever is necessary to achieve this universe's Ultimate Purpose, as Binary and Piono discussed. Oh wait, you don't know about that. How hard it must be to be less than omniscient!
SHUT UP, WILL YOU? YOU KNOW. YOU'RE A LOT LIKE POWDER. AND A BIT LIKE SCRATCH. BUT LET'S GET TO IT.
I decide to use the Butterfly Effect. I release a butterfly into the minecraft world, and then it flies into the Croach's motuh, where it then proceeds to beat up the Croach from the inside. Beautiful!
I put on a bakers hat, and start baking cookies! But not just any cookies... FORTUNE cookies! I give one to each of the Vord, and they all read aloud "You will soon meet a foul end", and I carefully consider if I concur with the cookie...
I concur. The magic cookies do their... magic, and every Vord who read them dies!
Squee its the trolls! I pet Nepeta like a cat and then go to heaven by bouncing so high. I eventually crash back down onto the croach's back. Woops!
Pogohammer of ZillyGUI: 3/?
I use the Nail Biter on the ground till I hit the Earth's core! I accidently non purposely totally not fair to blame me push the croach into the Earth's core nope was not me.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
If you are seeing this, you are qualified to win.....nothing! Have a nice day! You might wanna click these!
Daw! A B-!?
Bottom of the lake. Nothing past here.
W-W-W-W--W--W-W--W-WW-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W
-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W
You can win guys! Beat him! Destroy that pyramid! You may need to smoke him out... Go to the top room, and say the decoded words...."MSEKO VLIES"
By the way omglolsguy, Trickster weapons finish instantly. Well, they do now. They used to not do so. Speaking of which I take out the Combatdice of Zillywen and roll them at the Keepers, then use High Noon on them.
Fluorite Octet && Glitchiness = ///// // / [email protected] (Level 8: 5/9)
Turnspec Ringwear && Red Miles Picture = Ring of Orbs Seerfold (Level 10: 4/11)
Bionis Picture -c Mini-Mech = Mini Bionis-Mech (4/4)
The Baconcase || Lesser Bacon Elemental && 1 million pieces of bacon && Essence of the Bacon King, ruler of all bacon = Esculentus (Level 10: 8/11)
The Mouseattractor || Lesser Cheese Elemental && Every type of cheese ever && Essence of the Cheese Queen, ruler of all cheese = Certamen Caseus (Level 10: 8/11)
I kick a relish nuke into the Vord with aid from the Dragon Ender. The Vord were preparing from some paragraph of text that I normally concoct, and thus are wide-open for the two-line attack!
"ELITE SOLDIER. GOES BY THE NAME AUDIE. I SWEAR I JUST TOLD YOU THIS."
"...Huh. So you did. Dammit, a single elite won't change the tide of battle. Our forces are barely scratching them!"
"RELAX. WE'VE GOT AIR SUPPORT COMING UP SOON THAT CAN COMBAT THE MANTISES."
"They'd better be soon. Make sure they bring the heavy weaponry."
Reinforcements:
Engietech Soldiers: 500/500 (X200)
Audie, Elite Soldier: 50000/50000 (X1) (Elite - Immune to Vord infestation)
Engietech Technicians: 100/100 (X250)
Engietech Pyromaniacs: 750/750 (X100)
Current forces:
Engietech Soldiers: 500/500 (X550)
Audie, Elite Soldier: 50000/50000 (X1) (Elite)
Engietech Technicians: 100/100 (X750) (Have you noticed that these guys are always increasing their numbers by 250 each turn, while the other troops are becoming more plentiful per reinforcements as time passes?)
Engietech Pyromaniacs: 750/750 (X225)
Engietech Minions: 500/500 (X200) (These guys only appear in reinforcements around every 2 or 3 waves or so, just letting you know now)
"WE SEEM TO HAVE TOO MANY TECHNICIANS. NONE OF OUR ARMY IS GETTING TARGETED."
"We're gonna need them when we eventually DO get targeted. Especially later on, once we have non-elite troops that have decent sized health bars."
"POINT TAKEN. HOPEFULLY YOU GET TO ROLL OUT MORE ELITES BEFORE THE VORD ALL DIE, I TAKE IT?"
"Hopefully. I like watching my elites kill things."
I refill the sacred items a bit, then try using COMBAT OPERANDI: CONSUME, targeting the Vord Bulks. If I do manage to pull it off, to quote that one guy from the Austin Powers series, "I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain! Get in my belly!"
UGH... STILL DIRECTING TROOPS.
Pausing mid-battle, as if contemplating something, my drone pulls out a phone, dials Blue's number, and asks "Hey, there's an Earth holiday called Valentine's Day. Is there some sort of variant of that in your universe, like the whole Christmas/Humanity Day thing?"
Space: "Hmm. So, evidently, this is not something you want to take me into if it looks like I could just fly away. I see how it is."
This time around, I don't bother breaking the Bedrock cage, curious to see where the ship is trying to take me and knowing that continuing to break the Bedrock would only cause it to take longer to get there.
GODDAMN IT
STUPID GENDERFLIP VIRUS
In the grim darkness of an imprisoned Minecraftia, there is only war.
Lothyropolis
Vriska nods to Kalare in recognition. She's a bit too occupied with killing vord to type a response though.
Suddenly, there is a loud cacophony. Lightning, explosions, fire.
One of the republic battleships drops out of the sky. This lands on the croach and explodes, dealing some damage to it.
But the one who downed it might be a bit of a problem.
YOU!!!
Hello again Eric.
I'll kill you!!!
Eric's eyes burn with rage.
The first time anyone has actually seen him openly angry.
And he is terrifying.
Golden energy and runes spiral around his form.
A tornado of golden words that no one can read.
And a man angered beyond belief.
I'd like to see you try.
Piono hovers in the air, holding Ircucvci.
He no longer goes unarmored, he wears Denito Surrexit and Maleficis Est around his neck, and Nocte Consumens on his left arm. He alos wears Exedo, Mens Potentiam and Traho.
Death
Piono deflects the curse with his sword.
Do you think that's going to stop me?
Strength of the Titans
Upon Angels wings.
Demonic Rage
wrath oF THe gods
Smite ThE wicked.
Piono stops and blinks.
gorilla.
You've been prepping for this longer than I expected.
You bet I have you little jerk.
Now that is probably the worst thing you've ever said to me.
Eric snarls and launches himself at piono. There is a massive blast of golden light as Eric brings his blade down.
Piono has blocked the blow with Ircucvci.
He grins wickedly at Eric.
Surprise.
This trick won't keep you alive forever.
I never thought it would.
Eric swings broken anachronism about again.
Piono blocks.
Again.
Blocked.
Eric snarls again.
Time stream.
Unforgiving barrage.
You really are pulling out all the stops, aren't you?
Eric growls again and suddenly he becomes a blur, his rune-empowered strikes falling again and again, faster than the eye can track, and every time, Ircucvci is in the way, blocking the strike.
How...
Are...
You...
Piono catches broken anachronism, and plants a kick on Eric's chest that launches him backwards in the air.
Trade secret.
Eric is practically red with rage by this point.
Storm of steel
Physical hurricane
cursed Inferno
abyssal Depths
Bones of Mother earth
Eric is suddenly surrounded by a glow of elemental energies of various kinds, and streaks towards piono once more.
Piono cackles.
Suddenly, in his off hand is Deum Lucem.
Allow me to show you another of my new tricks.
He holds it up, and as the energies of the gauntlet of darkness and mace of light flow forwards, they mix and intertwine.
A few inches in front of piono the mix of light and shadow stops flat, as if hitting a wall, and spirals out in an intricate array of immense complexity. It grows and grows, the shadow and light splaying out in a massive pattern almost five feet in either direction in the few seconds it takes for Eric to close the gap between him and piono.
I am your lesser no more.
Piono surges forward, driving Ircucvci through the array he has created, the energies curling around his blade as he swings it to meet Eric's blow.
There is a massive explosion of mixed light and darkness...
And Eric slams into the ground. In his hand, the shattered hilt of Broken Anachronism. The shards of the blade rain down around him, glowing and leaving behind wisps of dark shadows.
Eric struggles to his feet.
How did you...
I've learned a few things.
I decided to accept my destiny.
Although it seems you have yet to accept yours.
Piono rushes forward with Ircucvci,
temporal dislocation
Eric is suddenly gone, and then not gone, and all over the place.
He shifts quickly between many different positions.
Oh, wonderful, you still have that stupid thing in your book.
Eric ignores piono, and instead begins an incantation.
Upon the course that once was laid
What?
A villain's hand must now be stayed
Oh for the love of...
And long ago a gift I gave
You have got to be kidding me.
The moment comes to be repaid
He still has this?
A final moment comes to fight
Even after I had TWELVE different universes he was staying in blown up!?
I now request a guiding light
Why!? Did he actually think I could beat him like this?
oN my own i can't set right
Obviously not, otherwise he would've had some half-decent combat spells prepped...
this story's true course from this blight
But this... How could he still have a Verse available?
to my side you now must fly
At least he knows not to use a Ballad...
answer please my desperate cry
Oh for the love of...
friend from place beyond the sky
Just shut up already.
I call upon thee...
Je- Piono smashes his fist into Eric, Eric's form wavers, with a look of shock, and then Eric flies into the air, a massive burst of golden runes explodes outwards, and then dissipates without doing anything.
What!? How did you...
Reality magic baby!
Not just good for passive defense buffs,
Turns out I can trash your rune castings with it too!
I...
I kept that saved for...
Yeah yeah, we get it.
And as much as I'd love to put you, Erelye, and every freaking other pain in my backside out of my misery, I really have to keep you from destroying my vord swarm.
You unleashed the vord?! How stupid are you?!
Its been working so far hasn't it?
And I, unlike those here in Godcraft, have a way to exterminate them should they get out of hand.
So I'm going to make sure I don't lose any more of my assets here.
And kill every single one of you that the Vord can't.
Piono ascends up into the air.
Heh.
He unleashes a massive blast of flame that rolls over the non-vord forces on the ground, costing several players and many clone troopers their lives.
Piono is now added to the battlefield. I will respond to attacks from him. He has 20 health. Just to assuage your fears out-of-game, he won't be respawning. In-game you guys don't know that though.
DTG Co Labs
Nope, sorry guys, no Destroy the Godmodder relevant stuff here...
At least, not yet.
Teethgnasher 11/11!
Men of the End 5/7
+1 to Amp x2.
I examine my newly-wrought eldritch pipe organ.
I cast Horrorterror on the Keepers.
So, Piono is back. Quite the problem, seeing as I'm the one who murdered him.
Well, he shouldn't have mercy.
Also, Twin? If you could actually keep note of how much damage entities did consistently, (e.g. my Field Agents having specialized damage), it would be great.
Action 1/3
Orbit Control: 47/50
Unholy Assault: 22/50
Blood Pact: 7/20
I send out a new player, GreatGeneral731, to defend the Preston Cole. His special ability is Tempered Rage, which gives nearby teammates and himself mini-crits and a 40% damage resistance for the turn and the turn following.
Hmm... something seems odd about that player. He seems to be from my universe... That's right! He's one of the professional Warriors running around.
It seems as if he's a high-ranking Swordsman, at least higher than me.
Sword Damage: 148K/250K
An alternate timeline emerges.
However, we must first start from the beginning...
Scribe's Wands && LED board running Conway's Game of Life = Life's Wands (4/7)
V-Cube 8 && (Curta Calculator && KNT-308 Sniper Rifle) = CTA-8 (5/9)
Potion of Panacea O0O Glowstone Dust = Potion of Panacea II (1/?)
Potion of Panacea count: 3
> Action: Detailed Process of Cubing
I drink a Potion of Panacea.
I then pull out the Planetcrafter's Speedcube. I first assemble the obsidian center pieces, then complete the opposite side, which for the purposes of this attack is the gabbro face. I then rotate the cube sideways and solve the adjacent basalt and granite centers before moving on to solve the gneiss and sandstone faces using simple commutators. I move on to the edges, solving the first few edges effortlessly as I am a master cuber that would hold all cubing world records if only I could get off my butt and go to a WCA event. Anyway, I then solve the rest of the edges using more commutators I then begin the final stage of the reduction method: solving it.
This is the point where the Grill Gloves come in handy as I solve the cube with the Fridrich method. First off, the cross, which I solve in 0.5 seconds intuitively on the basalt side, as it is not opposite the gneiss side which, when completed, causes it to scramble itself for 50 hours, which I regard as a massive waste of time. I then solve the F2L pairs, which by my great cubing skill has been almost entirely done for me. At this point, the basalt side is completed and it heats up to 1200 degrees Celsius. Luckily, my enchanted Grill Gloves with Fire Resistance XLVII and Heat Shielding XCIX protect me from the heat. Finally, I solve the OLL side in a single algorithm and half the PLL as well, allowing me to solve the obsidian side while ensuring that the PLL is the right permutation. Finally, I almost-solve the cube, holding off on the last U face turn.
Making the final turn and completing the cube without any of the four unsolved sides becoming solved previously, I place the cube down on the ground and telekinetically force the resulting mini-planet to hover five meters above the croach. It proceeds to begin spinning at over 8 meters per second as the process described in Incident 345-1 plays itself out, only scaled up 5/3 times due to the increased size of the cube. The resulting 3.83-meter sphere begins to cool down. I speed up the entire process by originwanding up a x100 speed field that dissipates when the sphere reaches its fully cooled form. This form is with seas of lava, with its land area populated entirely with mountainous areas. I then pull out the Unicoder and enter in "れꠝ𐌅 ᶃラቪꓔꛤ온ࡋ ⽥". Zapping it at the levitating planet, the gravitational field of the planet dissipates and the lava falls straight down, destroying some of the croach. I then write "れꠝ𐌅 🕴 ౺" with the Unicoder and zap it at the planet, which begins to fall. I telekinetically grab the planet and slam it into the croach from low Minecraftian orbit as if it were an asteroid, finishing the attack and damaging much of the croach.
I snipe some Endervord using The Stinger.
Shadow Turretcomputer Complete!
Heavy-Duty Thuleprism Mecha -c Mini-Mecha Psiionics Panel
Rechronology 4/11
Prismatizer 4/7
SCP-962 42/50
Dragonfly 4/20
UNSC Repair Droid 5/10
I then realize something: TROLLS!!!!! I rush over to hug Karkat, and he becomes so angry that he spazzes out, straight into the atmosphere! He then proceeds to orbit around the minecraftverse in his spazziness for a while, eventually re-entering the atmosphere and spazzing out right into the Croach!
Check out my bad CTM map reviews here.
Mini-Ion Cannon 0/2
Mini-Bio Annihilator 1/4
5/5 For Healing or Building Mechanical Unit
5/5 for Text Based Magic
10/10 x3 TBA'd Attacks
Battlefield:below
Orbital Weapons:
Partial Inventory: Critmist II x47, Ultramarine, Ghosts of War, Gib Armageddon. Potion of Vis x5, The Redstick, Potion of Nectar x28, The Bulletdome, Potion Airdropper
Wilson's Shop: $20
I dupe 3 potion of nectar
+2 to Wilson
-Alchemy Emporium-
Ah, one moment, Wilson...
No, there's no variant of that... Mainly because the holiday goes by the same name.
Do I want to know why you want to know?
-Battlefield-
Red says a spell quietly, and then leaps into the air over dramatically, wand glowing red. He uses the power of three ten posts charges to open a swirling portal, into which nearby vord are sucked into.
I vote for all the players to not use their specials. Is that a thing?
HEY, YOU. BLACK TEXT GUY. YOU'RE THE ONE. WHO ARRANGED THAT DREAM THING. RIGHT?
The very same.
WELL, IT CERTAINLY SEEMS. LIKE YOU'VE TAKEN A STARRING POSITION. AS OF NOW. AND I'M THE MAIN CHARACTER IN THESE POSTS. WHATEVER THAT MEANS. SO LISTEN UP. YOU ARE GOING TO LEAVE. OR. YOU ARE GOING TO DIE.
I should warn you that I don't possess the same... let's call it morality as Build. You won't find me yielding to you. I will accomplish whatever is necessary to achieve this universe's Ultimate Purpose, as Binary and Piono discussed. Oh wait, you don't know about that. How hard it must be to be less than omniscient!
SHUT UP, WILL YOU? YOU KNOW. YOU'RE A LOT LIKE POWDER. AND A BIT LIKE SCRATCH. BUT LET'S GET TO IT.
Oh no
I roll the Troper's 0ctet at the Croach.
Rechronology 5/11
Prismatizer 5/7
SCP-962 43/50
Dragonfly 5/20
UNSC Repair Droid 6/10
I grab a boulder and start beating the Croach senseless with it.
THE PROPHECY SEEMED FAR AWAY
BUT FINALLY WE'VE REACHED THE DAY
GIVE UP THE PAST, EMBRACE THE STRANGE
EVERYTHING YOU CARE ABOUT WILL CHANGE
When both sides are doomed, which do you choose?
DOWN HERE IT'S KILL OR BE KILLED
Check out my bad CTM map reviews here.
I put on a bakers hat, and start baking cookies! But not just any cookies... FORTUNE cookies! I give one to each of the Vord, and they all read aloud "You will soon meet a foul end", and I carefully consider if I concur with the cookie...
I concur. The magic cookies do their... magic, and every Vord who read them dies!
Alchemies:
"TNTNTNT!" = TNT Cannon (3/3)
"CHAINGUN" = Solflower (Level 4: 3/5)
Charges:
None
Inventory:
Here
Unknown Entity: 8/40
Actually, I'm changing plans.
I send out 200 Doom Drones and 100 Healosi over to combat the vord.
Doom Drone HP: 500 (x200)
Healos HP: 500 (x100) Summons more Doom Drones each turn and heals [AG] and [N] Entites each turn.
I use The BATTLE TECHNIQUE RAILROADER LV. 5: NO MERCY on the vord keepers
I'll be making my great escape now!
Pogohammer of ZillyGUI: 3/?
I use the Nail Biter on the ground till I hit the Earth's core! I accidently non purposely totally not fair to blame me push the croach into the Earth's core nope was not me.
If you are seeing this, you are qualified to win.....nothing! Have a nice day! You might wanna click these!
Bottom of the lake. Nothing past here.
W-W-W-W--W--W-W--W-WW-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W
-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W
You can win guys! Beat him! Destroy that pyramid! You may need to smoke him out... Go to the top room, and say the decoded words...."MSEKO VLIES"
Fluorite Octet && Glitchiness = ///// // / [email protected] (Level 8: 5/9)
Turnspec Ringwear && Red Miles Picture = Ring of Orbs Seerfold (Level 10: 4/11)
Bionis Picture -c Mini-Mech = Mini Bionis-Mech (4/4)
Cat drawn by me. Accepting requests, depending on a lot of things. DTG Atsume: http://www.imgur.com/a/tij95
1'-[7']-{'3}-'3-'3 '6-11'-7'-6'-7' '1-{'3}-8'-12'-'3-2'
'10-'5-'8-'11 1'-[7']-8'-7'-'3 '2-11'-2'-'9-7'
'10-'5-'3-'3 1'-[7']-'3 '10-8'-{'3}-['10]-4'-7'
'10-{'3}-'3-'3-'6-8'-4' {'3}-11'-2'-'9-7'
Spam restoration: http://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/forums/forum-discussion-info/2195940-posts-threads-deleted-because-of-spam-filter-place
Official DTG Cards Against Humanity suggestion pad: http://piratepad.net/DTGCAH
/null
If you are seeing this, you are qualified to win.....nothing! Have a nice day! You might wanna click these!
Bottom of the lake. Nothing past here.
W-W-W-W--W--W-W--W-WW-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W
-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W
You can win guys! Beat him! Destroy that pyramid! You may need to smoke him out... Go to the top room, and say the decoded words...."MSEKO VLIES"
The Baconcase || Lesser Bacon Elemental && 1 million pieces of bacon && Essence of the Bacon King, ruler of all bacon = Esculentus (Level 10: 8/11)
The Mouseattractor || Lesser Cheese Elemental && Every type of cheese ever && Essence of the Cheese Queen, ruler of all cheese = Certamen Caseus (Level 10: 8/11)
I kick a relish nuke into the Vord with aid from the Dragon Ender. The Vord were preparing from some paragraph of text that I normally concoct, and thus are wide-open for the two-line attack!
/null