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Well then....
Zombenstein: 17/50 (+1 Tazz)
Boney: 16/50 (+1 Tazz)
The L()rd eats every basketball ever made and throws them up on Charles. Maniac then adds a hint of cyanide to the vomit to make it all the more painful.
A man in the very far future is asleep, resting for a big day tomorrow.... Actually, I'll save this for later.
Balthios, Hoopz and Barkley jointly behead you before you can lay a tooth on any of the Basketballs! They're very vicious in beating you down, though, so the next attack against Barkley will be a guaranteed hit.
Once more, waiting for the winner before charge 2.
Well, now that the sides are on, looks like it's time to complete the bunch.
...I feel a tingling. But why?
Humanibli [N]: 30,000/30,000 (technically x3)
Wait. I just realized (maybe because I made this).
Attacks:
Deals 5,000 Damage Normally (5 if hit on player).
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
Abilities:
DON'T DO IT EVERYONE'S GONNA HATE ME
Lair Advantage: Excerpt from "Humanibli's Lairs Terms and Services": By entering Humanibli's lair and choosing to fight Humanibli, you agree to revoke any invincibility or near-invincibility to make sure the fights are as fair as possible. [BLOOP]ing lawyers.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- wait, what am I worrying for? I still have Shopkeeper Immunity! Nobody can touch me!
Just Plain Rage: 1.2x Damage Boost if Humanibli's been killed once before; 1.4x if he's been killed twice before.
Well. Now you've got that to worry about, complete with Mibibli and Zero getting the most benefit if you kill it. So...good luck?
honestly, I don't know what's worse: the fact I went through with this or the fact my next planned entity will, somehow, be even more trollish. I guess this will make everyone want to be on my side, so that's a plus, I guess. Lots of charge.
Humanibli summoned!
Humanibli taps you on the shoulder and says that the Narrative forced him to give the pass to the Descendants until the vauge date of 'When Charles Barkley is dead,' but everything else isn't invincible.
Well, good to know that Player Vulnerability is coming back AFTER the boss that can field wipe you is dead!
I put on the stone mask making me effectively invisible. Sneaking up behind Balthios I put on the bomb mask and put up my shield. I explode. I quickly change into zora form and punch him a lot before frying him with my electric barrier.
42/50 Life (+2 from Richard, +1 from Tazz)
7/20 splat tim
+2 to TheDrivingLlama.
1 Demon Blood Shard 1 Raspberry Pi 1 of any book 1 Empty Taglocks 1 Richard Taglock 1 Popcorn Bane of Lapis Ender Matrix Journal #-1 Black Hole in a Jar Tome of Knowledge Unwritten 18 Bedrock^2 Ingots Ultracondensed Wall
Balthios uses his powers over Corrosion to make the liquid fly into your eyes instead!
Tea || RNGesus Shrine = Lucky Tea (Level 5: 1/6)
15 charge boosts in reserve
45/50 This World...
45/50 Has No Need For Gods
Anvil On Stick With Pottery Shards Attached && Anti-Roleplay Essence 3/??
Olimar's Whistle >Fine 1/?
+2 Bomber
Golem: "Oh great a field wipe, just what I always wanted."Golem: "No, it's cool."Golem: "Those entities were taking up space anyways."Golem: "Who NEEDS entities, right?"Golem: "We sure don't because YOU MURDERED THEM ALL."Golem: "That's how it works, right?"Golem: NO IT ISN'T. GAH.Golem: ...Nice day today, huh?Golem: Birds are singing, flowers are blooming...Golem: Perfect weather for a game of catch.Golem: It's such a shame you MURDERED EVERYONE.I pitch an incredibly-short-range nuclear baseball at relativistic speeds into Hoopz Barkley. That is to say, a baseball containing an incredibly-short-range nuclear bomb.
Anvil On Stick With Pottery Shards Attached && Anti-Roleplay Essence = Anti-Roleplayer's Halberd (Level 25: 1/26)
Considering how many people RP, that weapon would be instantly fatal to pretty much everything that's actually a threat.
Olimar's Whistle >Fine 1/? = Olimar's Flute (Level 4: 1/5)
Hmm... Hatred of Formatting? Let's see if its immune to UGLY formatting!
Four score and seven years ago, our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But in a larger sense, we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men -- living and dead -- who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember, what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us: that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom; and,that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.
The resulting paragraph has soo much ugly formatting that the Hatred of Formatting Mentally collapses from ugliness, Deteriorating it.
Summoning Entity: 7/35
Counter: 7/50
The Hatred of Formatting sues you for false advertising. There's barely any formatting at all for it to rage at!
5/50 Operation "Artifact is Go"
6/10 Assault Team Omega +1 Charge
Inventory:
Data Crystal (Level 1)
Chaos Control "Sword" (Level 5)
Holocrom Datea Storige (Level 0)
Shockjewel Armor (Level 3)
Hmmm. Fine . Guess i have to do it myself.
Lets see that ruin.
Where is it? Hmmm. Aha
Turns out it was underneath Yggdrasil the whole time
Hmmm. So sophisticated
.................................................................
Oh My God, soo many tunnels, so many facilities, its like a miniature country here!
I can't believe no one has found this out yet.
Well T.A.T. forces are good at hiding stuff. Thats for sure.
Anyway, less talking and more exploring!
You immediately realize why this place was abandoned almost the instant you enter.
First, the roots of Yggdrasil itself are much larger than the tree, surprisingly-reaching out even thousands of blocks. You can already see the structural damage. But then, there's the whispering. The walls, the ceiling, the floor, everywhere around you-noise. Noise noise noise noise noise. Whispers of madness in eldritch tongues.
You could imagine why the T.A.T. decided to get out of here, this place would have driven them insane.
Diamond Murder Knife (Level 3: 4/4) Finished!
Crimtane II Blood II Diamond = Crimsony Blood Gem (Level 2: 2/3)
+2 to Pricey
Sukard 5/50 (+1 fro Tazz)
Arina Azuma 5/5 (+1 from Richie, again) Summoned! (30000/30000 HP (AZ) She shoots a laser at Mighty Beast.
I have a giant hammer smack the Captain in the back.
Calzerb stabs himself. (If you know what happened to Alliciar in DTG: Terraria, this is my kind of thing.)
Calzerb is dead!
1 damage! The Captain isn't a Godmodder...
Diamond Murder Knife: Literally the Golden Murder Knife, but with diamonds instead. This does technically mean the knife is, more accurately, spouting off lava.
=Turn One=
(2 / 20) R e m e m b e r m e , s o I m a y l i v e o n .
(10 / 10) Divine Barrier -> Change it up -> Godpile (+4 total from FBSN which I forgot to claim)
+1 to FBSN
+1 to Hezetor
=Action=
I pull out a Dome Fossil, calling upon Lord Dome to the area. (10 / 10 expended)
AG: "Hey Dome?" The Sleuth calls out to the massive god towering before him.AG: "I have one simple request of you, today." The Sleuth smiles, with an inhuman grin.AG: "Wreck their gorilla."UG:˙ʎןןɐuıɟ 'ɥoUG: ˙ǝןıɥʍɐ uǝǝq s,ʇı
Dome vanishes from existence, and reappears over Hoopz Barkley, plummeting both scythes downwards. Barkley is promptly impaled, but that's not the end of it. Dome swings his arm upward, unimpaling Hoopz. He goes flying up into the air, and slams him across the air with a scythe. As he hits a strangely flat surface, he realizes something; he's bounced off the surface! And that's because of a quick cantrip I casted on him, Rubber Form! As he bounces off the flat plane, Dome teleports to the other side of the plane and slams him once again, causing him to slam into the flat surface once again.
And then he realizes; Dome is playing ping pong with himself. I then set up a quick barbed-wire net, because I can. He gets rapidly smacked against the flat surface (which appears to be wood) as times goes on, the frequency of impacts increasing as Dome picks up the pace. There's plenty of blood everywhere, and then Dome flubs a hit, sending Hoopz into the barbed wire net. Dome then picks up the net with a scythe, and starts spinning the net around. He then flings him far into the distance, using the barbed net as a slingshot. He gets fired into an entirely different plane of existence, thanks to one of Dome's rifts!
anarchyAbalone [AA] started pestering Hoopz Barkley...
AA: HELLO THERE!AA: i suppose dome sent you here?AA: well (t)ha(t)'s fine!AA: Welcome to my DOM(A)IN!AA: D0ME T0LD ME THAT 1'D GET T0 HAVE S0ME FUN!AA: And We Deities Don't Get To Do That Much.
Suddenly, a bunch of random, massive Pokemon appear. Namely, every single last fossil Pokemon. Lord Helix starts off, assaulting Hoopz with the very voices that plague him, leaving him VERY vulnerable to every single last attack! The voices torment him, all giving him horrible insults and terrible memes! Next comes Lord Amber, swooping down from above and picking Hoopz up with his talons! He then flings Hoopz into the air where Lord Root pegs Hoopz with Energy Ball after energy ball, air-juggling him! This allows Lord Amber to rapidly spam Wing Attack for massive damage! After spiking Hoopz to the ground with Sky Drop, he gets impaled on Lord Claw's namesake; massive claws! Lord Claw rips him off the claw, then pounds him into the ground using Crush Claw and X-Scissor!
This allows Lord Armor to pop out of the ground using Dig, hitting Hoopz up and out of the ground, only to be hit by a Head Smash from Lord Skull! Hoopz is then kept on Lord Skull's head by momentum! Lord Skull and Lord Armor end up butting heads, smashing Hoopz inbetween! After being pancaked, Lord Claw promptly uses Water Gun to shoot Hoopz away to Lord Plume and Lord Cover! Lord Cover uses Surf, catching Hoopz in the wave! Lord Plume then flies in, avoiding the water as he uses Acrobatics to perfectly hit Hoopz out of the wave! Lord Cover then uses Hydro Pump strategically, sending Hoopz up into the air! Lord Plume then uses Smack Down, causing Hoopz to rocket down towards Lord Jaw! Hoopz is caught in his impressive maw! He then shakes Hoopz around T-Rex style, causing massive pain! He then eventually lets go, leaving him to Lord Sail's wrath. Hoopz is then stunned using Thunder Wave, and left totally prone when Lord Sail charges up a Hyper Beam!
Hoopz is promptly annihilated on the spot, and what's left of him is handed to Lord Helix. Helix first uses Rollout, squishing Hoopz as flat as a pancake! He's then covered in a fine layer of mud from Mud Shot. Lord Helix then uses Rollout again, squishing him flatter. He then uses Shell Smash. A godly torrent of water washes Hoopz out of the Fossil God's plane of existence, and back onto the battlefield.
=Command=
Valeera gains +1 Mana (for a total of 3) and then draws a card! She also notes that Deadly Poison is a 1-cost drop.
CARD DRAWN: Assassinate (5)
She then plays Fan of Knives, dealing 3k damage to all PZ's! In the case of Walker, this means... 1 damage? I don't really know. Due to Fan of Knives, she gets to draw another card!
CARD DRAWN: Ironfur Grizzly (3)
70,000 damage to Hoopz!
Walker is immune to AoE for the most part. He has to be targeted.
40/50 Dark Bowser (+1 from Ire)
2/50 Charging Something!
+2 Ire Lens of Truth && Spoon Bender 2/?? I focus, but do so in a very specific way: by dwelling on the fact that I just healed Charles Barkley with McDonald's Fast Food. Unless he was starving, in which case he should have been taking damage from that this entire time. Seriously, the food was ALL HE COULD PHYSICALLY EAT, TIMES 68 MILLION!!! (One for every customer per day) You also ignored the other part of my post, unless living after the Cyber-Apocalypse gives you the power to not be drunk. Which it shouldn't. The Cyber-Apocalypse doesn't make McDonald's any healthier, either. If nothing else, he, just like real life Charles Barkley, should be feeling the effects of a lifetime's worth of junk food. Attacks are supposed to be dodged, made invalid, or reversed by A. Random Chance (Not in effect here, it wasn't blocked or unformatted or anything of the sort) B. Rule of Funny/Awesome (It's funnier if my attack succeeds in this case rather than fails, especially in this boring way (Your attack meant to damage actually healed!). Simply put, more people found my attack funny than your counter.) C. Logic (Which is what I think you were going for here, but your counter was highly illogical). Getting healed from food? What is this, a video game?
In all seriousness, my attack was called "Reality Ensues", which is both a reference to TV Tropes and a comment that this attack was working off of real world logic. Everything in the attack was a conceivable hazard of everyday life living in a universe different from one's money, where McDonalds and Alcohol still exist. And, even if we say food heals, not in the wildest, not in the most detached from reality fanfics does eating McDonalds give benefits to someone who isn't a reverse-damage taker (heals when they should be hurt). Or drinking enough alcohol to get so drunk as to hit on the dead Enderdragon or the (then alive) Zerg.
The rage at these facts powers up my next attack. STILL 2/6 attacks left, Next attack gets Focus Boost (Note, so will the attack after that; I will focus again)
The problem is, a freaking French Fry (SINGULAR-may have been a chicken fry but that's not an issue, and it was from Burger King) is the strongest healing item in Gaiden. The second-strongest is GREASEY DEW from said fry. If Food Heals and a Fry did that much HP healing, It's safe to say that Barkley was probably starving that badly, and was probably only nourished by pure Basketball energies for a LONG while (to say nothing of the fact this version of Barkley is 89 at least). Because he was thereafter happy because he actually ate a freaking meal in the first time for a long time that didn't taste horrible, unless you literally forced the drink down his throats (and you didn't), he wouldn't have gotten drunk at all because he would probably have been more healthy than he ever was in his life.
Video Game Logic.
And B-Ball energies. Let us not forget the B-Ball energies. And the Godmodding from UserZero.
come to think of it, yeah, there probably was more going on than obvious.
Your counter-Godmod nevertheless strains his B-Ball energies to the point where he cannot do double-action this turn!
*sarcasm detecter failure was here*
useless long name: 7/50
thanks for the 1+ 3/20
Meh. Nukes are for children.
i try to kick a kickball at Charles, but when i go to kick it, i trip and fall shortly after i kick it and it boomerangs back and hits me on the head instead. Charles Barkley roll's his eyes so hard, he rolls his head and ends up accidentally snapping his neck while his eye's fall out. i cook some pain up with the frying pan, then give Charles a sample.
5,000 damage to Barkley! You then feed Charles Barkley bread! After all, bread is pain (in french)! It is at this point that his metabolism is taxed and he takes 5,000 more damage.
Shadow Mage got Nuked and E. Swordmaster got Owned due to Verboten Jam...
Let me tell you, First attack Cyberdwarf (Now Defeated) then attack Hoopz Berkley (or Balthilos James because he is a bit easier to hit) and lastly Charles Barkley.
I aim my Bayo-Laser Rifle at the super quick Hoopz, If i fired at him while the cross-hair touches Hoopz well... He's pretty quick.
An powerful Halloween themed summon 22/50 +2 from MegaMinEr +1 from Tazz
Sp00py Armor 5/25 (Part of my Halloween Miniboss summon.)
Fountain of Life && Light Magic && False Wings = Angelic Being 2/6
+1 Talist, +1 MegaMinEr
My Items
Fountain of Life: [Power Rank I] Heals the target for increased healing. (Currently using for a Upgrade)
Bayoneted Laser Rifle (Also known as Bayo-Laser Rifle) [Power Rank II] Used for Ranged + Melee with extra damage to the Enemy.
Plasma Katana [Power Rank II] Deals extra damage to the Enemy when used.
AlchemiesSCP-109 && Reinforced Hose1 && High-Pressure Pump2 = ???3 (1/?)
[1] Reinforced Hose: A thin hose capable of withstanding high-pressure water.
[2] High-Pressure Pump: A pump that pumps water out at high pressures.
[3] Basically what this should make is a device that can pump out an infinite stream of high-pressure water, high enough pressure to kill.
SCP-2223-A Figurine && Tallow Golem4 = ??? (Preview along with what it creates)
[4] Tallow Golem: From Thaumcraft 4.
Charges
Project M06-Internationalization (21/50)
Project M07-The Phonetician (3/50) (+1 from Tazz)
+2 to tc2142
Action
I stagger backwards from the insanity of Barkley's Verboten Jam. I then decide this ends now. First, take out the caster. I pull out a chunk of slightly transparent gemstone, carved with the image of a skull wearing a cowboy hat. From the gemstone faintly emanates the sound of millions upon millions of beer cans cascading over each other and the raging voice of an excessively angry Texan capitalist. I extract the inherent True Capitalist energies within the gemstone with my mind. Immediately, I am empowered with the power of every True Capitalist Radio troll. With this, I declare Balthios James the ultimate trolling target and immediately wage Troll War 4 against him. First, I begin splicing recordings of the voice of LeBron James into saying horrible, demeaning things about his great-grandson. Balthios is horribly offended and rages, causing all his blood vessels to explode. Next, I splice his voice into saying that he supports B.L.O.O.D.M.O.S.E.S., getting him to rage even more and causing all his organs to explode. I then cause it to rain a torrent of cans travelling at a ridiculously high speed onto his head, pummeling him into the ground.
SCP-109 && Reinforced Hose1 && High-Pressure Pump2 = Pump Them Up (Level 4: 1/5)
SCP-2223-A figurine && Tallow Golem = Magical Anime Girl Golem (Level 9: 1/10)
Magical Anime Girl Golem: Hrm, gee, this isn't exactly what it says on the tin, is it? Why, it is! The Magical Anime Girl Golem is a Magical Girl that looks ripped straight from a 3D anime. The kicker is that it can actually use magic, has Anime Physics backing it up, and it's also very steadfastly loyal to its crafter. The only issue is the unfortunate implications associated with it.
14,000 damage to Balthios!
The Agent dives behind cover in expectation that a .33kt hafnium bomb will create quite a flash, only to swiftly realize it has not detonated as predicted. Looking out, he watches curiously as an intense sphere of gamma radiation and slow neutrons is slowed to a crawl, their forms warped by the B-Ball energies to such a degree that they have become visible to the naked eye. A moment later, the intense wave of esoteric B-power washes over him, causing instant catastrophic organ failure, then cellular breakdown, followed immediately by painful death and slow melting into a puddle. After the initial energy-wave passes by, his implants spark back into activity, propelling a signal through the ether. It would appear we have lost a scout. Further investigation will be needed. Dispose of the remains. The remaining two warheads, now spattered with unpleasant person-goo, detonate in a cleansing fireball, obliterating everything within thirty meters or so before inundating it with a strongly adhesive incendiary cocktail. Some twenty thousand degrees Hence and a few hours Then along the Seventh Meridian, the outdated Extraction vessel Pluto receives new orders. It, and its escorts, are to travel quite a few Clusters out of their intended path, in order to construct a forward operations base. A new Great War has been found. Charge, b'cause why not; 1/40 +2 to Erelye, also because why not.
Richard stops you, because really, do you want MORE field wiping now? Unless you're Neutral, but even then that's just straight-up insane at this stage.
Potato kick-stater salad(a potato made of salad kick-starter.)13/25(or 17 if the helping effect works)
The damaged blasting pages && Damaged Transmutation field alternator 4/6 Damaged Warp Zone(also thanks to the curse of repetitiveness the power is further reduced)
my items
The Reinforcement level 1
Damaged The blasting pages level -1
Damaged Transmutation field alternator level -1
Book of support level 2
Reply to the GM post.
Well in fact it is maybe because the reinforcement does not have the power to create civilization like the Ruler of Fabrication.
Anyway you do not have to remember everything: it is impossible so I do not see the problem.
Action: I now attempt to create HLMs with the reinforcement to see if it can work this way.
15/25 | Headslide (+1 Tazz)
4/50 | Mouth Wide Open
The End Sale && Machina && Redstone = The Hard Bargain (Level 5: 5/6)
((This game isn't fun anymore. I don't know why. Maybe i need a break.))
Taking the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken and dropping burning hot oil on it. Then Seneca twists it's leg trying to rip it off, to seemingly no avail, and slams it into the ground with a piledriver out of frustration.
SeNeCa14: If i can't eat you, the stay down!
I'll say you probably do need a break. If it's not fun, don't do it, I say. I'll be the first to advocate for the game, but I'll be the first to advocate against playing it if need be.
8,000 damage to the ALVC!
Walker: level 1, 451000 damage
Best Pun Ever: 21/50
Dance Dance Revolution: 9/25 (+1 from Tazz, +2 from UserZero)
+2 to Fseftr
Walker, upon seeing Charles Barkley's impressive destructive power, just... freezes. His jaw drops, and despite being covered up by his mask, it definitely shows. His eyes flash red, and his sword falls out of his hand, clattering loudly on the ground.
"...HOLY... GORILLA..."
He, after a long moment of contemplation, decides that the best strategy would be to guard Charles Barkley. Walker does this by using his fancy sword skillery to make a mockery of the next miscreant who mistakenly means to murder the masterfully skilled man.
And some alliteration, just to make it get ruined even harder.
You guard Charles Barkley from the next two attacks!
I stare at the field wipe for a few seconds, before looking away. It WAS kind of expected.
Then, I smash a few tufts of grass with my fist, until I obtain some seeds. Walking off in some random direction, I reach the edge of a spruce forest. Excellent. I've always thought it was some of the finest wood around. Well, it is beat by one other kind, but I haven't exactly got that on hand. Hah.
I unsheathe what appears to be a diamond axe, and begin to fell a spruce tree nearby with swift, calculated strokes. Each strike takes an equal chunk of wood out of the soon-to-be-stump as the last, and I stand back moments later as the tree falls, collapsing into individual wooden logs on the way down.
I collect each individual log, as well as a few saplings. Then, I move over to the surrounding foliage, leaving the stump in the ground. As I near the other trees, I reveal a flint and steel. Without a moment's hesitation, I ignite the tall trunk, watching from several meters as the entire tree is reduced to cinders. A spark ignites the next tree, and then the next, and then the next, until all of the trees around the stump have been reduced to ashes. I put my flint and steel away, turning back to the stump of spruce.
I examine the stump for a few moments, visions of how a particular ritual is supposed to go swimming about in my head. I grab my axe, blade sticking out of the ground, and swing it down upon the center of the stump, leaving a large, deep gash in the wood. I crush up some leaves from the fallen trees with my hands, and drop them in the gash, placing my axe in my hotbar. Afterward, I scoop up some ash with my hands, and lightly sprinkle it in the gash of the stump.
Examining the contents of the stump, I pull out the seeds once more, satisfied. Let's see if I can summon this nature elemental. I drop the seeds into the gash, one-by-one, and spit into the cloven wood. A deep rumbling noise echoes throughout the forest. I stand back, watching the stump.
The gash begins to reek with a foul odor I can smell even from my position behind a computer, which is inside of something that is within the void of space. I watch, interested. Nothing I read about this ritual suggested this might happen.
Suddenly, I can hear the crackling of radiation mixed with the clipping of keratin, of all things. Okay, this was definitely not supposed to happen. Suddenly, an interdimensional rift is torn into existence, right before me, within the stump. I frantically scramble away from the deadly fabric of the thing, and peer inside. Within, there are clearly what appear to be… some sort of pretzels, along with robed creatures holding what appear to be… waffles? A clawed hand extends out of the portal, scoops up the seeds in the stump, and tosses a few more seeds of a different appearance out, before the entire rift just closes, leaving nothing behind.
Well, when I say that, I mean to say nothing that is not radioactive, seeing as everything within a thirty foot radius has just been struck with a blast of radiation. I quickly equip my hazmat suit, and examine the seeds just lying on the ground, unharmed by sudden increase of local radiation poisoning.
I take the seeds carefully, and pull out a Hoe of Growth. I trudge over to a pond near the center of the forest, and till the dirt block nearest to it, planting the seeds upon it. I go for my sizable bone meal supply, but then realize what I am holding in my hand. Right. I wave the Hoe of Growth slightly, and, with some green sparkling, the seeds instantly grow, becoming some odd, long stalks covered in tiny hooks. Some sort of fungus, perhaps?
I punch the plant, and look at what it drops in my inventory. "Esoteric Uranium Fingernail Plant Seeds" and "Esoteric Uranium Fingernail Plant." Fascinating, isn't it. I instantly till the land around the small pond, and plant all of my seeds. Then, I observe the Hoe of Growth for several seconds, before shrugging, and raising it into the air, in the same manner one might use a staff. The instrument glows with green energy, and I slam it into the ground. It immediately shatters into nothing, several hundred points of durability expended instantly. Suddenly, my vision is rather sort of pale white. I blink twice, and move my head, only to find that I am staring straight at a gigantic fingernail. Uh. Wow. This is bad.
I rush back to the Battlefield, still wearing my hazmat suit, seeing thick growths and stalks along the way, only to find that the esoteric uranium fingernail plants grew all the way to the Battlefield. I dodge past gargantuan fingernails. I don't want to know what happens if I am injured by them.
I wade through the thick underbrush of uranium fingernail plants, retching in real life at the stench pervading my nostrils. I see someone in the thick foliage, noting that the basketball court is entirely unobstructed, as is the part of the Battlefield containing most of the entities.
But not all.
I carefully push aside a springy hooked plant, and find myself face-to-face with Hoopz Barkley.
The fellow is not doing very well at all. In fact, his body is covered in scratches caused by the tough keratin of the plants. I wince when looking at him. He appears to be under the effects of something rather similar to radiation poisoning, steadily growing more and more withered with every second. I sigh in relief, as I am wearing my hazmat suit. The plants themselves go up to Hoopz's neck, or neck-analogue. Thin, warped blood drips from the many wounds, distorted by the radiation currently bombarding him.
I take a cautious step back as he collapses to the ground, several sprouting plants covering him. I stomp on where his head was mere seconds ago a few times for good measure, and walk off. The entire esoteric uranium plant forest glows with a distorted light for several seconds, before crawling back whence it came. Hoopz is revealed once more, and the entire entourage of plants recedes back into the stump, which glows, and disappears in a burst of radiation. A quick check from a geiger counter reveals the area to be safe, and I remove my hazmat suit, finding Hoopz still upon the ground, a gigantic fingernail having impaled him, and infected him with a horrifying illness.
(Ah, Dimension 953. How you please me.)
(+2 to Twin)
Transience: 23/25 (+4 from Crystal) /////////////////////////.
Discord: 22/50 (+2 from Richard) //////////////////////////////////////////////////.
20,000 damage to Hoopz! Hoopz is horrifically murdered!
...Forgot this.
Calligraphy: A black-feather pen, dripping with fresh ink at all times. It has a will all of its own and will write a rune no matter what it is, on the spur of the moment. Each time this is used, you roll 5d5 to determine what sort of madness you've just unleashed with this pen.
Alright... third one's the charm! Also... plasma bullets for the Telklacki Forcebarrage? I was expecting high-velocity lead rounds, but whatever floats your theoretical boat. Supression Turrets: 16/20Leviathan: 6/30 I use fantastic energy from the Blood Plane to summon an endlessly fueled Brimstone beam at Balthios James! Brimstone pierces everything and he cannot block it!
They're so high-velocity that the air around them incinerates, turning into Plasma (because Plasma is superheated Air).
Balthios manages to sidestep the beam after taking 6,000 damage!
Lesser Dog NEO: 4/10.
Narration: 8/50.
Tesla Scepter: 2/whatever
+2 to Fseftr
AA reappears from disinterest with DTG and slams Richard in the face with an endless stream of UserZeros. The UserZeros are not real, of course, but they are so realistic that they leave Richard in shock, making the real UserZero's next attack against him much more likely to hit.
UserZero relishes the opportunity given to her, as you manage to succeed in this endavor. Richard is open to attack from UserZero as he tries to figure out which UserZero is and isn't real!
41/50
Since apparently I can do charges and alchemies at the same time...
1/40
I feel as though it would be a good idea to help Barkley make it to Chaos Dunk...
I walk up to any AZ entities on the field, trying to block Hoops Barkley! If there aren't any(SOMEHOW) I prioritize the Goblin Auto-Barber instead. If there's more than 1, I go for the weakest, HP-wise.
I show the entity a card, and ask them to tell me what it is. They do. It's the 19 of Tuxedos. I'm not using a standard deck. I shuffle it in with the other 73 cards, and then pull the card off the top. I ask them "Is this your card"? It's the 3 of Fancy Hats. The entity says no. I scream "WRONG ANSWER" while turning the card around-it has "17 of tuxedos" on the back! As punishment for answering the question wrong, the entity is forced to descend into a mystical portal. He can select which land it takes him to, for an hour of fun there! There are five options:
Candy Land
Happiness land
Cool People Training Land
Buzzsaw Death Land
Land of Peace
He selects "Candy Land". I respond with "whoops, why did I put a board game name in there? Please select something else."
He goes for Happiness land next. I say "Ah, man! Sorry, but 'land' isn't capitalized, the grammar nazi in me won't let you go there."
Getting concerned, he hits "Cool People Training Land". I tell him he's not cool enough.
Really panicking, he goes for "Land of Peace". I say okay... oh wait, nevermind! That land's at maximum capacity right now: 0 people, since that's the only way it can ever be peaceful!
"Oh, would you look at that! There's only one option left. I'll hit it for you!"
You can probably guess what happens to the entity for the next hour.
(IT'S BUZZSAW DEATH)
(FINE. Generic Minecraft Bow && Richard Themed Designer Bow)
He points out that he chose the 19 of Tuxedos, not the 17, so it's the right answer, thus you are forced into the choice instead. Fortunately for you, Buzzsaw Death Land turned out to have a non-indicative name and it actually was a bit of a deathmetal theme park.
Generic Minecraft Bow && Richard Themed Designer Bow = Extreme Bow (Level 30: 1/31)
I feel sorry for you right now. I just do. I know your pain.
@Tazz I just wanted to say a thing about Scolippi, since his stand was automatic and guided by FATE itself, the destruction was irrelevant for the user and the stand itself should reform briefly after the explosion, but if you think that his mechanic was bad or something else it is fine. Does my factory (10 post charge created to be a proper entity still exist?).
I wonder if the impact destroyed the larvaes, you know they were just spawned and ultra resistant to damage, eh.
Anyway since my char is too proud to do it I'll shed a tear for all the beautiful zergs killed.
The IMTE work on Leetuma (mostly paperwork) will not disappear, their charges will be used in the future by someone else (10/40) their bodies may have been destroyed but their legacy will live on.
This "B-Ball"...this power... this is new... let's see what it is exactly...
Hezetor proceeds to cast a series of spells to identify both B-Balls and Charles Barkley, the first one is Identify, that will (probably) allow him to understand the magic proprieties of an object.
He activates Truth seeing, this spell allows him to see everything as it is really, without illusions or tricks. (a creature morphed in something will be saw as it is really).
Then it uses Analyze Dweomer an improved version of Identify that will show all magical proprieties of an object, his function when it was created, how to activate the object, how long ago was created and with what spells.
To conclude he tries to determine the nature of the energy by scan-analyzing the remains of the energy in the area.
If my factory exist it will produce:
Maxis v1.2 E344
HP:50.000
Shield: 20.000 (+5000 per turn)
This is stuff that has not changed.
This is a standard warrior bot, has been created with the purpose of being able to operate in all climates, his relatively simple structure allow a faster production,but super heavy materials were used in a perfect combination between agility and resistance, by themselves they are not armed, but come with an included plasma rifle capable of doing his job in killing biological life forms.
The plasma rifle is not included inside of the robot to avoid some construction flaws of the past.
They are capable of managing their weapons well, a generic AI allows them to use most simple weapons very well, so expect accuracy.
Their AI is nicely made, they will try to take proper cover and they have at least the ability to do not damage allies while fighting.
Thanks to the recent upgrades of the factory the E344 unit posses an integrated shield of energy capable of reforming over time, clearly is necessary to destroy the shield before it is possible to attack the robot.
The new Factory produced nano-machines inside the body of every unit, these little guys will slowly heal all damage done to the creature as long as it is alive.
The module of weapon production allowed this new version of the Maxis to bring a refined Laser Gun, giving it more damage.
Did I mention that all of them are armed with a plasma grenade that will cause AOE damage? (plasma manipulation + weapon production)
+2 to Irecreeper
Charges
Concordant Killer 4/25
Rugname 16/50 (+1 Tazz, +2 Irecreeper, +2 Richard)
Flying Throne > fine = Throne of the Skies (Level 5) 1/6 (Or should I just subtract the difference from the original alchemy?)
module && flying module = ? (Level 1 2/2) Done, this time I have no idea of what this could possibly do, but I'll call it "Module of ?".
Your spells reveal an immense orange-blue pulse from Charles Barkely, a pulse that is, much more lightly, stored within every Basketball, or B-Ball. Apparently, playing Basketball well generates more B-Ball energies and makes you a better player (in addition to just getting good naturally). No illusions are involved, you see Barkley exactly as he is, as are his Basketballs. The standard Basketballs are, well, made exactly as you think they are. Barkley's two are different: The orange one is apparently made to sap B-Ball energies, and still itself contains so much that improper handling could unleash a Chaos Dunk. Meanwhile, the Blue One is made of pure Slamicite and Jamicite, materials that improve a Baller's skills to their absolute limits, and was made at a time ancient to begin the sport.
For reasons of sanity, let's assume the Larvae didn't survive but the Factory did. The Zerg were, relatively, a pain to work with compared to a simple factory on my end, and really most of the Zerg was dead that turn anyways. You wouldn't have been able to mutate Croach in time for the Larvae to mutate into Drones then create new Hatcheries, and the Larvae need Croach to live. Production will begin on the Maxis E344. Unfortunately, it won't come out until next turn and can't be ordered until the turn after that.
It is not the Module of ?, it is literally named, in its entirety, "?". That being said it really only allows for flight like you probably expected.
eft]Post IIY replaces the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken's feathers with burning torches.He then uses a Deconstruction Staff on the Basketball Hoop. Solar Monolith 14/15!SCP-882 14/2500c: Serpent, I thik it would be a good idea to use some of the Soul of the Core's special attacks.
2/40
I walk up to Hoops Barkley and give him the QUANTUM SUIT OF ULTIMATE QUANTUMNESS that is REALLY SMALL. He attaches it to his body in an attack-blocking way, and the next person or thing to attack Barkley will not only have their attack fail, but be shoved into a painfully tiny suit of armor! With thorns inside! Because!
The Relative: 50/50 =================================================== (+6 from jondanger, +3 from Pricey, +2 from Kayne, the Godmodder, and Erelye, +1 from Tazz)
Lightsaber || Fan = Multi-Bladed Lightsaber(3/3) COMPLETE
Scribe's Wands && Arcade Cabinet = The Space Invaders (3/4)
I +2 Erelye as thanks for him being the inspiration for this attack.
Cerberus uses Eruption and passively uses Condition! Pilcrow uses Never the End! Or not, because of course the second I rejoin this game the entities I put a lot of work into go down the drain before I can command them.
I don't summon The Relative just yet.
The Scribe hastily flips through his Journal. "Time to find the good stuff. ...A-ha! Perfect!" The Scribe flips to a two-page section depicting Archaic Sorcery. There are a lot of diagrams, mathematical equations, ancient runes and symbols, and images of apparent tears in space and wands. The section reads as follows: One of the oldest forms of magic in the universe, Archaic Sorcery was developed in tune to the Elemental Planes of Existence, of which there are eleven thousand. It can only be wielded by a sorcerer who has been trained in the Element for many years and has complete mastery of it. They can then completely align themselves with said Element and become truly one with it, using their magical powers to further their Element's path. Written in bold next to it is the following: DO NOT ATTEMPT IF YOU ARE UNALIGNED. In small text next to that is: Possible side-effects for unaligned archaic sorcery may include boils, malformed organs, a withering touch, an instant lobotomy, severe heart attack, spiritual enlightenment, diabetes, sleep paralysis, paralysis, brain paralysis, seizures, mind control, a revoked magician's license, an exile from the magic community, haphazard teleportation, loss of limbs, sublimation, freezing of blood, cancer, and/or death.
Shutting his book, the Scribe takes out a copper coin inscribed with the image of a waffle. "A coin for every element... Yes, this collection is certainly extensive. It took a lot of illegal trading to get these. Thankfully, an unaligned Archaic Sorcerer can summon an aligned Sorcerer by flipping the corresponding Elemental Coin, getting it to stand on its edge, and saying the chosen Element. The language you speak the Element augments how many Sorcerers appear, I believe, so this should work."
The Scribe flips the coin with a hesitant expression, watching it tumble through the air and land... tails. He sighs. "Here we go." The Scribe flips the coin again. Heads. Again. Heads. Again. Tails. Again. Heads. Again. Tails. Again. Tails. Again. Heads. This repeats for several hundred flips until he gives up, throwing the coin far away into the air and losing sight of it. The coin hits a passing bird, bouncing off of it. It tumbles through several trees, knocking an apple off of an oak branch. The apple tumbles down a hill, entering a giant cave. It bounces across the stones and ores in the cave, breaking open. The scent of the apples attract some zombies who mistake it for flesh since they can't smell. A hundred zombie swarm to the area at once, the pressure they put on the ground cracking the cave and open and creating a massive sinkhole that disrupts an entire biome. The coin, still in flight, is disrupted by the shockwave this event creates, causing the coin to lose all its spin and letting it sink like a stone down to the ground, the wind carrying it right next to the Scribe. The stone skips and spins along the ground until it lands at the Scribe's feet - on its edge. He blinks twice, speechless.
"Well then. Time to say the magic word, literally speaking." The Scribe clears his throat and says a word that no one recognizes.
The Elemental Coin of Waffles sparks with copper lightning, energy bursting forth from it, creating a column of fire that towers across the sky. The power of the Scribe's language - whatever it is - seems to have had a massive effect. An entourage of nine people clad in brown cloaks jump out of the fire, running around in a circle near the Scribe. He looks at the Journal. "The wardrobe, the jumping through fire... It all checks out. You're definitely Archaic Sorcerers." The fire dies down, and one of the Sorcerers speaks. "Seqq, zj ukuwxp aw wrj. Bsc okuqiy'x ta? Osqj yk, phtxp azk hfap tjwcynniv iefstryhexx xeyec ktc xzkuxfyhk kf djlvk, sozqo twnmfsprlhy iwpwk hipj hi taltsriv wt f btdsndnsr ggjvjsemgj." The Scribe rolls his eyes. "Right. I forgot you all had your own personalized language." He takes out what looks like a tape recorder and hits a button on it. It rewinds what the Sorcerer just said, but in English. The Scribe nods his head, listening to its words. "Oh, you wouldn't believe the story. Last time I tried this, I was running in between worlds - I was being chased by, who was it, Epoch? Epoch the Envincible? Yeah, he was certainly powerful, but he couldn't name for beans. So I tried to summon one of you, but I guess the coin landed at angle? I summoned a bunch of robbers dressed like you instead. Funny story, but it's for another time. Now, to business."
The Scribe points to Charles Barkley. "You see that mythological figure? He hates waffles. Kill him." The nine Sorcerers' eyes all twitch in unison, copper lightning sparking from their hands. "Zuij, xeca ytzc paas rtci kqbyqp. Azwtjapv, oa'lq fexsyk mnx. Fdwh gqll, za's f llxwgejupv, eanfhp xg oohnpxq, cufwomfc tmj evwa's xjnvwps, bjwggie yt elw far, bp kwp iy. Sza dat'x lz jwad ymtw yqy bfqjdas." The Scribe plays back his speech. His expression darkens. "I don't think that's a lie, anyway." The Archaic Waffle-Sorcerers teleport into the shadows, rushing up to Charles Barkley and preparing to give him a crash course in the main course - the course being a course of food, and the food being waffles. Two of them take out rugged wands and shoot globs of enchanted butter at Barkley's hands, nailing him to the ground. The stickiness of the butter prevents him from moving, and when it hardens like concrete, he's completely immobile. He tries to kick the Sorcerers next, but they repeat the process with his feet. Anticipating further attack, a third Sorcerer aims a wand at his head. "Uex, N vrgs ytz'ci sxozy es ynob f diukni yzryqe bmtgz siqq dxjathm es lde sjlvwot hnec, ynag f mekgeyglpd, wni pysug aqq zj mo ozy dmeqlyfyigqsqd tr lde xulr gb a xjnsfz. Ik dzy lny, N'qw ifcowlp cgqr rtfxz siym hexbljx, mvwwknsr cgqr ofh."
Charles Barkley struggles against his bonds, and the other six Sorcerers move in. One of them converts Barkley's eyes into waffles, blinding him. Maple syrup/blood drips down from his eye sockets as he tries in vain to scream - but if he opens his mouth, his jaw will snap in two thanks to a buffet of waffles. Another sorcerer twirls his wand in a circular formation, lightning reaching out and zapping Barkley's head, cutting a circular hole through it. The Sorcerer looks at Barkley's exposed brain, zapping a bolt of lightning through it. The lightning doesn't do any real damage, but it changes Barkley's thought processes, giving him one thing and one thing only: a pathological lust for waffles. And what's the nearest source of waffles? Barkley's eyes. He frantically tries to reach his eyes and savor the delicious taste of circular grid-shaped breakfast, but he can't. Because what's trapping his limbs? Solid butter.
All this leads to the most uncomfortable experience in Barkley's life, as he constantly tries to eat his eyes without any viable means of doing so. Two other Sorcerers transmute Barkley's arms and legs into waffles - disconnected chunks of breakfast food. The now-amputated Barkley watches in mute horror as the bonds holding him back are now freed - the butter's now holding waffle to the ground. Barkley flops like a fish, guiding himself by rolling on the ground to his delicious prizes. He opens his mouth to try and eat what was once his arm, forgetting all about the wand pointed down his gullet. In an instant, Barkley gets more than he ever bargained for. "Wlwnrll, uoz fdowz ftw elao."
First, a whole waffle appears in his mouth. He chews it up excitedly. Then, another appears. He begins to eat that as well. Three more appear, and Barkley is in heaven. Then seven more appear, and his mouth begins to swell up. Barkley begins to recognize he might have a problem. After several minutes, Barkley digests all of the waffles contentedly, barely registering the Sorcerers around him. He opens his mouth once more to eat his limbs, and once every tick, a new waffle appears in his mouth. Soon, his mouth is bursting with waffles - they spill out of his mouth, spill onto the ground, and they fill his cheeks, causing him to swell up like a balloon. He chokes on them, unable to breathe, spitting out waffles across the field like a projectile cannon. The nine Sorcerers sit back and watch the chaos, continually spawning more and more waffles while eating waffles themselves. Although Barkley cannot see, since his eyes are waffles, he now has waffle-sense - he is able to recognize where waffles are. Barkley begins to slide his way towards the Sorcerers with his last breaths, trying to eat what they are eating.
Then, the final two sorcerers make their moves. They zap Barkley full of lightning, carrying his entire body upwards and holding him in a bubble while waffles still spawn in his mouth. Lastly, his mouth swells to the size of an entire room, Barkley twitching and spasming as he tries to breathe air that he can't find. Finally, he goes still - right as his head bursts open with the force of holding hundreds of waffles at once. The barrage of bloody waffles spills everywhere, bouncing against the bubble they're contained in. With their power, the two sorcerers transmute all of Barkley's flesh, waffles, and waffle-flesh into a singular waffle - one of absolute perfection. And they all eat it. Bite by bite. Piece by piece.
The Waffle-Sorcerers walk back to the Scribe, satisfied with their work. The Scribe watched in awe at their deeds, extremely impressed. "I... I've gotta say, I've never seen anything like that before." A few of the Sorcerers chuckle. "Phfsv cgq ftw jsmn knso agndx. Gfx jaaqqj, xzwt bfdr'l oo mfch. Sjytsp gsj dt bsel se ino, wg hosl lw lded mlzw w rjqlxareqd npwwr xhsivqlj kzv s beb mfrvnei dpejo. Bjxthwo, ik ysiq hiajo mf Zirjywakn 953 ytz, xzay'i gp nmot qnvi mo. Tmjj'h zwvj fwp lde ynxi aj tmj hsjhd." The Scribe plays back their words and runs to them excitedly, registering what they said. "Wait, wait. You live in Dimension 953? Isn't that--" A Sorcerer flips a coin, landing it on its edge on the very first try. A column of fire appears, and the Sorcerers circle around it like before.
"Uex. Ysi Vemjsdmgj ok Wlrvkmsjdw. Dknl wpggcnneph so a gjlggj ok nyggipwjsifoignwmlu tt ysska ozydmva. Ozw vmfz hfx wmnad ympvw bow jzrk, otzijmfc Eqjxifps fso Qscih. Dzy kdozqo wlkp gd dsea tnrp. M tat dtf lsre gjqsja, bzy yso phfy jsm gntb hlsp ytz vrgs ntb... Jsm ohtzwh eaey za aaph zx. Jsm're lte umetj ysi ukis hzpdacynzr." The Sorcerers jump into fire, one by one. One of them points their wand at the coin on the ground, and it flies through the air into the Sorcerer's palm. He waves. "Ef dtf hg ottu mc, lny ymp fqvasytrw harudlszex. Ysiq'ne ingmfa!" The column of flame disappears, and the Scribe ponders the Sorcerer's words. "...What does that even mean?"
Charles Barkley reforms a half an hour later with no recollection of the previous events, having sustained immense physical damage. The only thing that Barkley remembers is something dim - a massive fear of waffles. (If someone else blocked the attack, replace all mentions of 'Charles Barkley' with their name.)
30,000 damage to Charles Barkley!
Multi-Bladed Lightsaber: Think of a lightsaber that has five blades. In any other weapon this would be supremely impractical, though the cutting power of this Lightsaber does it justice. Sadly, Lightsabers do carry weight (it's actually kind of hard to explain), so it requires some extra strength to wield. You can extend how close/far the blades are with a dial on the side.
Anti-Unoriginality Turret 19/50 (+2 from Richard)
Hypocrisy counter since charge 15: 1
I go ape on Charles Barkley. Literally. I turn into an ape and try to smash his face in.
I then wonder what the point of the soul of the core is, because it's only counterattacking.
Balthios turns you back with the Elemental Power of Apes!
I wonder as well. The irony of it is, the Soul of the Core would be considerably more well-off if Serpent was playing considerably more aggressively, though that could just be me.
Post IIY attaches several fireproof bandaids to the Soul of the Core's heads.He then attaches more fireproof bandaids to Balthios James. These bandaids happen to be fireproof because of their metallic nature, and are still red-hot from the fireproof bandaid testing facility.SCP-882 15/25SolarMonolith Complete!Y puts away a cinder-like chalk, having used it to draw a flaming, sun-like summoning circle on the ground. He reads the final lines from a golden, chain-adorned book that the enderdrim military has provided him with, and a blinding light descends from the skies. The glowing ball of light causes a large hole to appear in the crimson clouds, descending through it before stopping just as it touches the ground, cracking open and revealing a rocky, monolithic structure with glowing orange crystals running through it levitating slightly off the ground. Mechanics:
The Solar Monolith doesn't attack by itself, instead generating Solar Shields around other entities, protecting them. It generates 3 shields per turn at the beginning of each end-of-turn battle, with a maximum of 3 shields. The shields are single-use, blocking all damage from an attack and damaging the attacker, but destroying the shield. The entity protected by the shield can also use it for a single-use offensive dash, which deals more damage than the counterattack, but consumes the shield. The shields do not protect entirely from player attacks or special attacks, instead reducing 50% of the damage. If a player attacks an entity with a shield, the shield isn't consumed. The shields are indicated by a ) after the entity's health bar, like this: Solar Monolith: HP/HP. Shielding Entity 1 and Entity 2. Entity 1: HP/HP. ) Entity 2: HP/HP. )) The Solar Monolith is airborn, and immune to most potion effects due to its rocky, non-biological nature.
The Solar Monolith is Neutral, but will currently grant 1 shield to any entity defending the Basketball Hoop.
3,000 HP to the most damaged head of the Soul of the Core! 5,000 damage to Barkley!
29/50 Binary Slime
16/30 Badge 4 engie x4, serpent x2, free, uzi x2
+2 engie
Airstrike Beacon AND TM25 1/?Blow Gun AND TM13 from Gen 2 1/?
___
Mercury runs up to the goblin auto-barber and cuts his hair. Whoops, he accidentally cut his head off, ah well. Accidents happen, no sense in worrying about it. That'd just cause undue stress.
I hit the random enemy with my Baske- I dont want to but instead, a club
An powerful Halloween themed summon 23/50
Sp00py Armor 6/25 (Part of my Halloween Miniboss summon.)
Fountain of Life && Light Magic && False Wings = Angelic Being 3/6
+1 Talist, +1 MegaMinEr
My Items
Fountain of Life: [Power Rank I] Heals the target for increased healing. (Currently using for a Upgrade)
Bayoneted Laser Rifle (Also known as Bayo-Laser Rifle) [Power Rank II] Used for Ranged + Melee with extra damage to the Enemy.
Plasma Katana [Power Rank II] Deals extra damage to the Enemy when used.
You club Crocidibli for 2,000 damage! Techncially, the GS are enemies...
The Relative: 50/50 ===================================================
Scribe's Wands && Arcade Cabinet = The Space Invaders (4/4) COMPLETE
The Space Invaders && PC = The Personal Space Invaders (1/≥4)
Scribe's Wands || UFO Model = The Xenomorphs (1/?)
I +2 jondanger.
Several minutes later...A GREAT SNIPPING OCCURED TO MAKE CHARACTERS COMPLY, BUT DON'T THINK I DIDN'T SEE THOSE PARADOXES.
Uncle Grandpa: [AZ] HP: ???
Yes. I went there. This is Uncle Grandpa, star of the hit(?) cartoon "Uncle Grandpa". Uncle Grandpa is the uncle and grandfather of everyone in existence, and he goes around solving problems. The major thing about Uncle Grandpa is that, being firmly rooted in cartoons, he runs entirely off of cartoon logic. He can do whatever he wants with no repercussions, pulling giant bazookas and laser cannons from his hammerspace-powered Belly Bag, creating clones of himself and pulling body parts off of himself at will, and even creating plot holes to hide in.
Because of this ability to do random crap in any way he wants, Uncle Grandpa is decidedly different from most other entities. He has no set attacks or passives, and what he does is entirely dictated by me. If there's a turn where I don't post, then that means he doesn't act. Uncle Grandpa has little HP, but very high defense, making him a lot like a godmodder in that sense. He is not a meatshield. Attacks do not only deal 1 damage to him. They can do more, but they won't do a lot. And that's just the attacks that can hit. Uncle Grandpa's as good as defending himself as he is at attacking!
Uncle Grandpa can also call on his friends if he wants. But I'll reveal more about them if he decides to. And yes, since he just noped all the paradoxes, there are no paradoxes left, and therefore there's nothing that can be used against this guy to start with.
To start things off, Uncle Grandpa decides to make a post on the forums. He pops into existence onto the Minecraft Forums website, wondering exactly how to post and what's considered proper etiquette. Uncle Grandpa takes out a massive log the size of a skyscraper and drives it into the code of the Minecraft Forums, making a post of wood appear on it. The wood post disrupts the BB Code that formats the forums, causing two random enemies to blink out of existence and take damage!
I start a new charge. This is the last one I'll be doing for a while.
The Future: 1/50 ==================================================
I will say it now: I do contact the RNG whenever Paradoxes come into play, a D10000 for every Paradox. 4 in this case due to how powerful it was. 1 is the worst result, while 10000 is the best, and this is strictly in relationship to the person who rolled it.
In order from lowest to highest, here are the results: 3391, 4333, 6032, and 9792.
Uncle Grandpa Successfully summoned, but he's already lost an HP from the Paradoxes, so he's down to 9/10 HP! Meanwhile, various things fall out of the sky: A pair of goggles lands on the ALVC, giving it Sure Aim (meaning it can't miss now!); A Slightly Ornate Iron Sword (Level 2) falls right in front of you, planting itself 2 inches into the ground; and finally, on this Slightly Orante Iron Sword is a pair of what is apparently Car keys, labeled 'Bad Jokes are worse through Repetition.' You get an urge to click its one button-its big and red, but you're assured that it is, indeed, something amazing.
DO NOT PANIC, THE UPDATE RESPONSE SECTION HAS BEEN MERELY CUT IN TWO.
TO ANYONE CONFUSED BY CRYSTAL: The forum somehow merged my posts, but it wouldn't let me update if the posts were merged, so I had him null that so they wouldn't auto-merge. I didn't even know they could do that.
DarkSide: Double-bladed battleaxe, one blade head on each end of the handle && Laser Gun && Accursed Flamethrower && Bright Ruby && Flaming Emerald = Dual Destruction Mk. 1 (Lv. ?, 1/?)
Justin's machines and equipment: Staff of the Cometians Mk. 1, Tome of Frozen(?) RGB (Red Green Blue) Mk. 1
DarkSide's machines and equipment: Malice Mk. 1, Pure Terror Mk. 1
DarkSide: Intimidating Vessel (15/35) IIIII/IIIII/IIIII/IIIII/IIIII/IIIII (+1 Compensation) Justin: Planetary Unrest (13/35) IIIII/IIIII/IIIII/IIIII/IIIII/IIIII (+1 Compensation) (it WAS both charges, right?)
===============
Entities:
Zilch! Zada! Nothing!
===================
I look around, and whisper to Justin about... private matters. We agree on the plans we made.
Then, Justin and I both rush to (seemingly) attack the GSs, only for us to stop before we even start to attack. We were both extremely good at lying, so really, we slipped from Richard's grasp without him even noticing. We explain to the GSs (before they decide to try to call us out) what we were actually doing, and ask to join their side. We aren't taking "no" for an answer. (Hey, we've got nothing to lose after T. Dora happened, so wynaut?)
+1 to Pit, FBSN
You join the GS faction!
Double-bladed battleaxe, one blade head on each end of the handle && Laser Gun && Accursed Flamethrower && Bright Ruby && Flaming Emerald = Dual Destruction Mk. 1 (Lv. 5, 1/6)
Crusher48: Alright, that does it. Not only did you bypass the Enderdragon's defenses to kill it, you destroyed the Dragon's Nest, somehow blew up all the Ender Crystals at once when only one can be hit at a time, and you anhillated a 30 post charge after 2 or 3 rounds. Unfortunately for you, I have the ability to convert destroyed entities into extremely powerful secondary charges (if my entities die (especially unfairly like this) I can convert half the charge into a charge to use in a revenge move, this is well known since the DTG2 incident where I controlled SCP-2317 briefly). So, Barkley, are you ready for me to completely DESTROY your sport? No? TOO GORILLA BAD, BASKETBALL WILL BE DESTROYED!
The best way to destroy a sport is to remove the implements the sport is played with. The hoop is indestructible, but the balls? Not so much. I summon Tom Brady and his associates, and combine my energy with his pure cheating power to cast the Curse Of Deflategate. Suddenly, Barkley finds that the basketball he is holding has suddenly deflated to the point of being useless! He switches to another ball, but finds that it is also deflated! Angry, he goes to ask the ref for another ball, but the ref is not there, because I lured him away with the promise of my INFINITE GOLD GENERATOR. When he raids the storage room himself to grab a basketball, they are all popped, deflated, and useless. Cyberdwarf (if still alive) suddenly shrivels up as his basketball skin becomes useless and deflates.
Crusher48: Enjoying the curse yet? Good luck finding an undeflated basketball, because there are NONE! EVERY basketball that is present in the universe now, has been present, or will be present, has deflated. The energy of B-Ball itself is fading, and with it, so will you. And don't even bother looking for a basketball pump, those were destroyed too. Except for a few though, they were immune to the curse so I stuck them in my impenetrable bunker. Only a Godmodder can get in it, and since your friendly godmodder UserZero is back hiding behind the Barrier and refuses to come out, you are out of luck.
The Bunker: I imported a bedrock bunker from the Void to store the few pumps that could not be destroyed by the Curse. The bunker has the following defenses:
1) The barrier turrets: The barrier turrets are designed to stop any intruders from penetrating the defenses. The turrets automatically shoot the INSTANT something enters its range for an automatic hit that does moderate damage but more importantly sends the victim flying back 100 blocks with very high knockback. It is impossible to get past without some sort of godmodding.
2) The Entrance: The entrance is the only way into the bedrock fortress. It has "only" 5 layers of obsidian in the wall, with a lava layer in between each obsidian layer. It is very difficult to mine through without being incinerated. At the end of it is an anti-inventory beam that destroys all of an intruder's gear, followed by 1 more layer of obsidian.
3) The Labyrinth: An automatically-shifting labyrinth of death. The labyrinth's entry doors shut behind anyone that enters to trap them in the maze, which changes the parts that are out of sight to make it nearly impossible to beat. There is always technically a way out, but the maze is programmed to hide this way out and change it if someone gets too close to finding it.
4) The Guardian Golems: The Guardian Golems are indestructible iron golems defending the pumps. There are 4 of these Guardian Golems in the Pump Room, which is only 25x25x3, making it very difficult to move around them. The golems have a special poison they can dispense as an attack to paralyze victims, in addition to sending the victim across the room with their fists (they are smart enough to combo a wannabe tomb raider with this).
5) The Shield: The Shield preventing anyone from accessing the pumps can only be removed by placing basketballs on all 4 of the pedastals on the north, south, east, and west of the shield, all within 5 seconds of each other (failure results in another Guardian Golem spawning). Where are you going to get basketballs if they are all deflated? Don't worry, deflated basketballs dont count (like you would bring them though...). If one does not bring basketballs (or they were destroyed by the anti-inventory beam in the Entrance), the pedastals have a 10% chance to activate without them, but that leaves you with approximately a one in ten thousand chance to get it on each run without spawning another Guardian Golem.
6) Self-Destruct: If the Shield goes down, a 60 second self-destruct timer initiates. If it goes off, a near-infinitely powerful nuke anhillates everything (except the last basketball pumps somehow) inside the base, then automatically rebuilds the base (minus any intruders) 1 minute later. The only way to stop it is to get to the Control Room of the bunker (conveniently on the other side of the Labyrinth from the Pump Room), then hit the one button out of the 100 buttons (all identical except for one being the right button) that teleports you out (the other 99 detonate the nuke immediately).
7) The Anti-Bypasser Room: A sealed impenetrable room with an anti-teleportation device (that may stop the button to teleport UserZero out of the exploding bunker from working), a device to regenerate any bedrock that is somehow destroyed, and a retaliation system to smite people trying other ways to do Sequence Breaking or Dungeon Bypass on the bunker.
Since UserZero will not leave the barrier to get the Basketball Pumps to restart the game (she will die if she does due to unfair amounts of defense), this means Barkley and friends have to play with deflated basketballs. This makes it nearly impossible for them to do any significant damage with a dunk, and also drains the B-Ball energy itself away, damaging Barkley and his buddies and weakening.
(OOC: Hey Tazz, balance is going to be horrible if every boss gets a 2-turn charged attack that field wipes things. It invalidates a ton of charges in ONE unavoidable attack, and makes entities useless. Seriously, if entities get unfairly screen wiped every 2 turns, you might as well summon a bunch of charge attacks instead, at least those will get some decent effect in before being wiped out. Also, if entities are unable to damage the godmodder, then there is no point to them, because we could overrun UserZero or Richard in entities and do absolutely NOTHING, at the very least let an overwhelming entity advantage translate into, say, the godmodder sacrificing 2 HP to do a Blood Magic screen wipe (though then we get into the problems with screen wipes again). And how would a team charge work?)
OK, Crusher48, I will answer those questions. I will attribute some of what you said in this post to bad management of mechanics on my part-but I will also say that it was bad entity management on part of your fellow players and really, I could TELL this turn was an incoming disaster from a mile away. I will say that Verboten Jam is only a field wipe if Barkley gets access to the Hoop-and he did. Otherwise it is strictly single-target.
But enough of that. Crusher48, I have a question for you. For some, this question was a long time coming and it could wait no longer. For me, its only recently that I realize that this isn't a disproportionate response to the situation regarding you. And, YES, there is a situation.
This is going to be a question that you will answer truthfully and fully, and you will not hide behind any In-Character Justification, or my status as a fresh, new GM who's kind of poor at balancing (I'M TRYING!), because by all due intents and purposes I know at least a THIRD of the playerbase (all names anonymous) who have a confirmed chip on your shoulder for your basic attitude towards this game, which can be summarized in a single term by one member: MUNCHKIN. Aka, basically playing the game to WIN, and not actually have fun in any form EXCEPT to win, at all costs, no matter the detriment to the experience you create to others. Munchkins are one of the most toxic things I could ever think of in my life. For a Munchkin, to win, everything is fair play: Minmaxing, cheating, the most absurd Rules Lawerying, anything. This is basically Godmodding within the bounds of rules, so basically it's as close to Godmodding as you can get. In other words, you are exhibiting traits of exactly the kind of person that TT2K himself was trying to mock (and have beaten up) when releasing this game, the exact kind of person who would be a godmodder, and your behavior in these games as of recent has been a great reason why the Godmodders have never been a good person. I cannot legitimately name a time when you've been legitimately pleased in this game, and indeed, most of the time you've been whining because of some RIDICULOUSLY OP thing you did was noped because it was, in fact, RIDICULOUSLY OP. When it wasn't this, it was entity mechanics (and though I will say Barkley wasn't supposed to have it that easy, I will ALSO say that Barkley field wiping you was more of an expectation than a threat on my part-future Gatekeepers won't be so ridiculous in generating wipes that fast, but if they can make you wipe, they almost certainly will).
If you refuse to answer this question or do not give an answer that I find satisfactory, or if you do not follow up on your answer in a way I find satisfactory (and I would like to think I am reasonably generous about this), you will be banned from the game-OUTRIGHT BANNED-due to your Toxic attitude and endless whining about balancing in a game where the balancing is still in its most prototypical stages-this is quite literally the first serious boss. I am NOT Twin-I am FULLY willing to ban you due to very poor behavior, and that you established the GS faction will not be any bartering chip here. I consider the GS faction to be more of an idea that a lot of people had that you brought to the surface, and that people joined proved you weren't the only one with that idea. speaking of not being alone in ideas, I am NOT alone in this thought that you ought to be outright banned from DTG-a third of your fellow players, at least, are of a like mind, which is why I'm making this.
My question is, Are you honestly going to improve yourself? because, let it be said, I have brought a great deal of evidence to the table that outright says that attitude needs to improve, or you shut yourself out of Destroy the Godmodder for, basically, a year, not counting other games.
Your posts will not be counted until I get an answer from you. The post can be null or PM'd for sake of time/reducing clutter. I'll give it a read-over and decide from there.
Before you even THINK of chewing me out over this-I was very tempted to just outright ban you on the spot at this point. I'm giving you a chance. I'd like to think I'm reasonable, and I admit that I'm my worst critic (for I misjudge myself), but you are testing the limits of my patience unlike every other player thus far, and responses to you have been one of the reasons these updates get so long sometimes, because those times, your posts DO require a level of reading through to explain exactly why your OP and highly disruptive action simply isn't going to fly.
I summon two portals from my shoulders, somewhat like Orbitars. I motion my hands forward, and a vast amount of magic flechettes flies toward Balthios James! Said entity soon drowns in the overwhelming amount of darts that pierce him through!
@TwinBuilder: WOAH, that's massive... and pretty unique, so I have no objections.
Oh well... Good thing I brought my magic contact lenses! I put them on... and they fall into my empty eye sockets. "GAH!" I fly like an airplane into Hoopz Barkley and whack him with a taco shell.
I forgot to do this earlier, so I'll do it now.
Drakonite: This special material is what makes Sukard's Amor. (Btw Sukard is Drakus backwards. I know this is useless, but I thought you'd want to know.
Crimtane II Blood II Diamond = Crimsony Blood Gem (Level 2: 3/3) Finished!
Chlorophyte (If it makes the alchemy level too high replace with Grassite) II Dirt II Herbal Medicine = Healium (Get it? :p) 1/???
+2 to Pricey
Sukard 6/50
Vritra Chenbog 2/6 (+1 form Pricey)
Best.
Idea.
EVER!
I invite Charles Barkly to challenge me in a basketball game, but when he tries to do a shot, the hoop and the ground disappear. I am still standing of land, though. He falls into lava, and then the void. (Is Senor Banana dead?) Azuma shoots her energy shots at the PZ Chicken thing. Neo Ultima does a generic slash of genericness on the Uncreativity Monster.
Blocked stopped Walker, who wisely decided that he didn't want get between the Waffle Sorcerors and Barkley.
Crimsony Blood Gem: A gem holding the power of the Crimson. It changes regular stone to Crimstone and make the Crimson spread and such, and gives you control over standard Crimson mobs. Giving it blood grants it more power.
Summon: citricsquid: 1/50 (might make a boss, considering real life status and attack)
A monkey's paw 4/20
2+ to megaminer
oh noes
someone has set off the tnt
Your action doesn't do anything.
Criticsquid was already summoned in the 1st and 2nd games, and can't be resummoned. Sorry! Plus, that's 3 charges out of the two you are allowed (Alchemies are separate), so consider it good riddance.
A Tactical Genius: 16/50 ================================================== (+6 from Generic, +1 from Tazz)
+2 to Crystal
Poof. In the blink of an eye, nearly the entire army on his side was gone. They were just evaporated by the power of the Verboten Jam, which was considered the weakest of all the ancient forbidden B-Ball techniques. A terrifying prospect indeed, considering his access to Chaos Dunk. Thankfully, it would be a short while before Barkley could pull of something like that again. The power of the illegal move had damaged the court, which was currently closed down for maintenance. This should give him a chance to set up again and continue to take care of any threats before Barkley returns to the court.
Before that, he decided to make a call, looking at the obliterated remains of doggy. All that remained in the center was a gray cube that surrounded a clear orb. There were six holes in the cube, one on each face, making the cube as some sort of a frame for the orb. Bomber silently walked over and picked it up, examining it for a moment. He then snaps his fingers, opening a small rift to his right. Reaching in, he grabs something and yanks it out. Out of the rift came a tiny green imp wearing a courier's outfit. Bomber held him by the tail, but wasn't too harsh with his handling. "Take this..." he said, pushing doggy's cube into the imp's hands, "...and deliver it to michel. doggy may have been obliterated, but this is all we really need. Also, tell him I appreciated his help and will ask for more in the future." The imp simply saluted Bomber and hopped back through the rift, off on his delivery task.
With that done, Bomber pulls out Da Shootiest Bolter once more and fills it with proper ammo this time, being the Paerotheum Bullets. "Ooh, I am eager to find out how these ones do. The last ones were quite... successful." Clip loaded, the large gun was ready to go. He held the gun shakily, filled with anticipation. He had grown to understand why Orks love these things so much. There was something oddly satisfying in firing this thing. Hearing its noise and bullets drown the field. And so, aiming at Hoopz, he pulled the trigger. "DAKKADAKKADAKKA!" Bomber roared; not like anyone could really hear it over the gun's own noise. There were simply too many bullets to be dodged, numerous amounts of them hitting Hoopz in spots especially damaging to a B-Ball player.
Worse for Hoopz was what was within the bullets. These would be far more potent than the crude ones Bomber had made by hand earlier. Made in the Alchemiter, the firestorm would be even more fierce than last time. The constant peppering of bullets eventually ended, and there was a brief silence. Suddenly, Hoopz violently burst into flames. A huge wall of fire poured out of his wounds and all around him, absolutely covering him in raging flames. His body couldn't even be seen in the chaotic firestorm, only a shadowy silhouette flailing around in agony and panic. The fire spread very far around him, perhaps even to other PZ entities. Convection made the air around him sweltering, dangerous to those not resistant to heat like this. Eventually, the flames died down. Hoopz was charred, suffering severe third degree burns on his entire body. Every movement was pain, not to mention the eventual infections that would ensue from these wounds. Bomber dramatically blew away the smoke that was coming out of the barrel before putting Da Shootiest Bolter away.
Meanwhile, the once elated cacophony of squeals and trills has now been reduced to an equally loud whining note. The cheerful Pink Horrors are all but gone, replaced by their much more sullen relatives the Blue Horrors. Incessant grumbling and squabbling emanated from the crowd, as they eventually decided to take out their frustration on Hoopz as well, firing their devastating hail of Flickering Fire upon him. The air was filled with a hauntingly beautiful display of zipping and zapping color. Though, the perpetual scowls of the Blue Horrors did not change. Considering there were almost twice as many horrors, there were going to be many more projectiles flying around now. Of course, they add their charges to Bolt of Change as well.
Throne Room 5/5 well, kind of useless but I guess I will complete it!
Fort Rebuilding 1/20 (This is only for the sidequest, I'm not actually going to summon an entity)
The Pit 1/20 (Also for the sidequest)
As the fortress explodes, the remaining citizens flee. However, they completely stop moving as if stopped by time. Their eyes shut, and their skin turns pale. They grab a pick and endlessly start mining where the crater from the fortress was. I try to stop them, but they seem protected by a mystical barrier. Nothing can get past it...
SERIOUSLY? You wiped out my fortress? What did it ever do to you? rrrrrrrrrrrrr. I dunk Charles Barkely. Into a tub of milk. I then give him donuts, and he fights to resist but he can't. He eats the donuts.... But nothing happens. So he eats more, and more, and more, and more. By now he has consumed more donuts than the average human does in their lifetime. He feels dazed. I then take out the forge stoker, and tap him lightly on the head. This actually fixes him and makes him feel fine. He looks at me strangely.
Me: You know I have to damage you right...
I spin around my hammer, and before he has time to react, I slam him in the stomach.
Alchemies:
The Forge Stoker: Level 4
Holy Flame: Level 3
Peacetime: Level 3: A staff that gives off a calming vibe. It's powers grow with the level of peace around you, so as it stands its very weak. When it is strong, however, it can do great things.
Iron Forge Hammer: Level 2
Coldheart Hard Drive: Level 1: It's a hard drive that keeps itself very cool.
Holy Flame || Peacetime = Fear No Anvil (Level 10: 0/11)
Balthios attacks you before you can damage Barkley!
==Turn 1==
Salt 7/50 (+1 from Tazz, +2 from Richard, +2 from Bomber)
+2 to Erelye.
==Action==
Crystal summons a flickering echo of a silver-glowing crystal orb with the Spellbook of Time, ripping a much-weakened echo of a future alchemy out of time itself. He points it at Barkley, and a beam of silvery radiance pours out of it, purifying and scouring away some of the basketball star’s B-Ball energy and thus reducing his HP by a not insignificant amount, due to being less durable.
==Entities==
Storm will use Aeolian Scream, targeting Hoopz and Balthios. If one is dead, Storm will instead target the non-dead one with Storm-Threnody. Stone will use The Fire Sermon on Barkley.
Rashki Sends Shia Labeouf, (a mental disease that serves Rashki and I) after Charles Barkley, somehow giving him ALS! While Charles is still gaping at his doctor while he tells him that he has ALS, Rashki flogs him with the Shockwhip (Minicrit due to meditation).
The Cavalry (x28 automatons) 30/50 (+5 from Nimble)
Tqpohfcpc TrvbsfQbout 1/50
Sword || Medusa Head = Gorgon Blade (Level 3: 2/4)
thing I didn't summon Zineous last turn. That would've been baaaaad.
I walk up to Charles Barkley, dark electric-like bolts flickering around my hands. My eyes suddenly turn a piercing red, drilling straight into Charles Barkley's soul. Charles quickly puts up all his defenses against magical attacks, and Uzi helps out. If Walker's still guarding, I pull out a pie from my Infinite Pie Cornucopia and pie him. I slowly walk up to Charles, he's too afraid to move. I walk up to him, and- and-
poke him. He immediately laughs in my face and shoves me the other direction. Soon, he starts violently coughing. Then he turns green. Then he sneezes. Then a cat falls on his head. Then a mole lands on his head. Then someone hits him with a pebble. And then he spontaneously combusts. BOOM. I then take off the needle I had on my finger, so I don't poke myself on accident.
=Alchemies=
Super Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad && Unfair Mario = Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad 4/4 [Done!] (Technically last turn, but you forgot to give me a description)
Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad && Mario 64 = Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad 64 2/???
Logic Distortion Remote - currently projecting Super Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad
Bowser Amiibo - consumed making Bowser Amiibo Mushroom
Hylian Beam Shield
Infinite Pie Cornucopia
Super Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad
Voidmetal Bottle
==Charges==
25/25 Crystals of Al'tuine EXPENDED
I close my eyes, in deep concentration. The air around me shimmered, as if reality was about to collapse into itself. Slowly, three crystals materialized around my head, in slow orbit. One was deep blue, with a water emblem attached onto it's surface, representing rain. Another was a frosted white, with a picture of a snowflake on it, representing snow and hail. The last one, the one I was looking for, was a blinding yellow, with a image of a lightning bolt on it, representing thunder and lightning. I opened my eyes, snatching the yellow crystal, the others vanishing in a flash of light. This was Alo'tuine, the crystal of Zineous, the god of thunder. I put it away into my inventory.
25/25 Thunderstorm EXPENDED
I then continue to take Alo'tuine back out from my inventory. I send a pulse of power through the crystal, hopefully telling Zineous that I wanted him here. Soon enough, a storm cloud comes towards the battlefield alarmingly fast. As it settles over the battlefield, everybody looks up at it in awe, seeing the bits of gold scattered within. For this was not a normal storm cloud, this was the temple of Al'tuine. A bolt of lightning comes down from it, and when it dissapears, Zineous Thun'dere, the god of thunder and lightning stood in its place.
[AZ] Zineous Thun'dere HP: Standard for a 50 post charge. Specials: Okay, Ima work this in phases, if you don't mind. PHASE 1: Between 100% and 75% HP Zineous has access to these attacks: Summon Lightning Elemental Zineous will summon 10 Lightning Elementals. They are 1 hit KOs. After 1 turn, they will explode, lightly to moderately damaging PZ entities, depending on how many are left. Thunder Rage This one is simple: he simply summons lightning at 1-3 PZ entities. (random) If 1 is chosen, it will be focused. If 3 is chosen, it is weaker. PHASE 2 Between 75% HP and 25% HP Zineous has access to all the attacks above and the ones directly below. He will be called: "Charged Zineous" at this time. Static Spark Fires a spray of electrical sparks. It will hit 3-6 PZ entities, paralyzing them one turn and lightly damaging them. Discharge Releases energy from his Lightning Rod. Deals heavy damage to one entity. 3 turn cooldown. PASSIVES: Static: When Zineous is hit, the attacker will take recoil damage and possibly become paralyzed. PHASE 3 Between 25% HP and 0% HP Zineous has access to all the attacks above and the ones below. He becomes airborne and evasive. Summon Dark Nimbuses Summons 2 Dark Nimbuses. Dark Nimbuses are airborne and have the passive Static. After 2 turns, they smite 3 enemies each for heavy damage, but kill themselves. HP: 5000. 3 turn charge. Bomber Drops some Thunder Bombs, dealing AoE damage to any entity that attacks next turn. 2 turn charge. Shock Shield Will only use when within 2,000 HP of his life. Summons a shield with half of his max HP. After 2 turns, the shields remaining HP will restore Zineous' health by the amount of HP the shield has left. Can only use twice ever. PASSIVES: Salvage When Zineous dies, he boosts one of my charges by 10.
The Nonexistent 5/50 (+2 from Richard, +1 from Talist, +1 from Tazz) Could someone help me make this a boss?
World's Shortest Charge 1/1 EXPENDED
The Lesser Pretzel Elemental has been summoned!
5000/5000 HP Special: 2good2eat UserZero cannot directly or indirectly damage the Lesser Pretzel Elemental.
UserZero sees so much potential in the Lesser Pretzel Elemental and tries to brainwash it. However, it inevitably fails, as this was a charged summon, and it says she can only brainwash uncharged summons in the rules! UserZero is so frustrated, she bashes her head against a wall, taking damage until the Lesser Pretzel Elemental is killed!
Rugname 2/50 (+1 from Talist) +2 Hezetor
Zineous will defend the hoop this turn. SOMEONES GOTTA DO IT! Yeah, I'm talking to you. Yeah you, with the entity. Get it guarding the hoop, or baaaaaad things will happen.
Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad: This Sketchpad houses the power of completely Unfair Super Paper Mario. Unwinnable bosses, unsolvable puzzles, easy! It's only passable due to a series of glitches and exploits in space-time.
Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad && Mario 64 = Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad 64 (level 5: 2/6)
Hylian Beam Shield (Cool): This Hylian Beam shield is a cooler variant on the original, and also more quickly equipped in case of emergency.
I heard you chatting about how you were going to use Two summons to summon the same entity, and this IS under 50 posts of charge, so the Crystal is expended and Zineous is summoned! He will do as you say.
It was never said she couldn't brainwash charged summons, just that she CAN brainwash Uncharged summons. Plus, that's literally a one-post charge, which is effectively an instant action. Henceforth, she drags it to her side. Lesser Pretzel Elemental summoned!
DarkSide: Double-bladed battleaxe, one blade head on each end of the handle && Laser Gun && Accursed Flamethrower && Bright Ruby && Flaming Emerald = Dual Destruction Mk. 1 (Lv. ?, 2/?)
Let's see if I can't do this... I try to use my Obliterator Form with Ved Vozahnil, but that crumbles. But... the Dark Star that was held within wasn't. It was useless on its own, but if I could fit it into a new weapon of pure darkness... something more canon...
I scoop it up before something bad happens. It'll be used at a later date.
With the Dark Star in my hands, and my beloved Ved Vozahnil disintegrated, I took on Charles Barkley, completely resisting the B-Ball energies flying in all directions as if they weren't even there. Hmph. Basketball... Sportsball is sooo much better. It was clear that no basketball moves ever conceived could even make me flinch. ESPECIALLY with no entities on the field anymore thanks to the late Transcendent Dora. Are you prepared for the biggest loss you've ever faced in your life? I fly around Charles quite rapidly, before subjecting him to a nightmare... a nightmare where the B-Ball energies were as worthless as Magicarp (if not more so), where all Basketballs were all extremely spiky and would cut anyone's hands off if they were touched, and where basketball hoops were far too tiny to even try to squish anything into them....
...And... well... the first and second nightmares were both true, causing the basketballs in everyones' hands (including Charles') to impale their hands, and the B-Ball energies were converted straight into Level 1 magicarps. And seems there were no notable limits to these energies, the magicarp piled up on top of Charles Barkley, eventually crushing him under the sheer weight of the fish and/or making the fish spread out onto the ground in infinite directions.
As all this was happening, Justin and I found spots to fire/swing our weapons at Charles. All of them. New and old.
They don't call me the Lord of Nightmares for nothing, you know. Eheheeee...
1) We won't get blown up by a random offhand field wipe if we're guarding the hoop. Or we wait until Chaos Dunk is done.
2) Tazz said the rest of the bosses won't have field wipe. I think.
/null
I SHOULD have specified: In the future, Bosses will not have gimmicks that will lead to turn 2 wipes; I have not said that there will not be wipes to bosses, especially Gatekeepers. However, this boss invoked Prisoner's Dilemma a little too hard, so it's specifically the Prisoner's Dilemma kind of thing that's being avoided. If you're not careful, Gatekeeper wipes can happen again. In a way, the fact Barkley wiped you was good, as it taught YOU how powerful and dangerous Gateekeepers are, though Barkley's case may have been exaggerated because of the turn 2 wipe. Granted, I will also say this: The next one's mechanic is MUCH less likely to cause wipes in general, and doesn't have as much high-maintenance as Barkley does.
I've been on a short vacation, but I'm back now. (The spam filter seems to have eaten the last post I made before I left, which would have completed one of my charges.)
Kanohi Hau Nuva: 25/25
The Kanohi Hau is the Great Mask of Shielding, and the Kanohi Hau Nuva is the enhanced version. It allows me to project a forcefield around myself and nearby allies. It can only be maintained as long as I hold my concentration, which is reduced by any impacts to the field. Additionally, it cannot protect against psychic assaults of any kind.
Skarmory: 22/25
I look around the battlefield, seeing what has changed in the past few rounds. I make note of the state of the Alchemiter, too.
(By the way, I'm playing AZ, if that wasn't established already.)
Kanohi Hau Nuva (Level 5): You explained that best. This mask can be upgraded still if you find an Alchemiter upgrade to improve level.
A lot has happened, most recently a large field wipe taking out all but the most recent Entities. The Alchemiter is basically the same as before.
I suddenly bring up Trollian, contacting a particular person.
-- terminalAutocrat [TA] began trolling cucumbersTriggerman [CT] at 18:29 --
TA: yo
CT: Who is this?
TA: doesnt matter
CT: You're here for a business deal, then.
TA: what else
CT: Location, target, time. Standard price.
TA: some obscure server in universe c hoopz barkley now
TA: well theres two
TA: ill elaborate on the second one later
CT: Done. Expect to provide payment immediately upon carrying out the agreement.
TA: k
CT: And, a little advice.
CT: Don't turn your back on the pickle.
TA: wow that totally isnt cryptic at all
CT: Expect in ten. Preferred modes?
TA: simulacrum -- cucumbersTriggerman [CT] ceased trolling terminalAutocrat [TA] at 18:41 --
In Minecraft, I watch Hoopz Barkley as carefully as possible. Let's see here.
A sphere of starry material appears in midair, floating about harmlessly. I watch it with interest. It sails through the air, before abruptly careening to the left, and passing through Hoopz Barkley. Suddenly, space and time begin to shift, air folding around the orb, as well as Hoopz. Within in single moment, Hoopz is spaghettified, and sucked into the sphere. Oh well. I'll just have to examine the results, I suppose.
Hoopz is sucked into a strange world. His vision goes completely black for a few moments, his body undergoing a strange tugging and shifting sensation, his insides sloshing about within him. A few seconds later, vision returns, revealing his destination. He appears to be in an abandoned city street, the air thick with fog (and smog). Hoopz is unable to stop himself from coughing slightly. He looks around, trying to find his way. Turning around, he sees a metal sign attached to the brick wall nearest to him. It has an arrow pointing eastward, and is adorned with a simple phrase.
Barkley decides to follow the arrow, and heads along the side of the street, walking upon crumbling sidewalk. There is nobody nearby, nor any sign of them. Hoopz continues to walk upon this street for several minutes, before hearing an ominous crackling noise, like the sound of a booted foot crushing a can of soda. Barkley reaches an intersection at this time, and opts not to cross the street, turning left, onto a much foggier end of the city. The crackling noise is the only sign of human presence in the entire area.
Hoopz hears the sound of what appears to be booted men running across pavement, and senses imminent danger. He continues walking, seeing as he is afraid of no human, being Hoopz Barkley, and all. Hoopz hears what appears to be the sound of a rocket launcher being fired, and an explosion moments later. Okay, that is definitely not a jumpscare. This is clearly someone trying to kill him. Hoopz immediately gets into a combat stance, waiting. He likely says nothing, because "show yourself" gets people killed.
Hoopz is suddenly startled by the sensation of a bullet impacting the pavement directly next to him. Resolute in his defense, he does not move a muscle. That, of course, is when the second bullet strikes him in the foot. This causes Barkley to jump, if only slightly. There is a muffled click, and Hoopz feels an excruciating pain in the center of his neck. Seconds later, he passes out.
Some distance away, on the roof of one of the abandoned city's buildings, a figure reloads their sniper rifle with what appears to be a literal pickle. The being blinks for several seconds, their THIRD EAR sense being boosted slightly. The being stands, having completed their task, and utters a number of clicking noises into a walkie-talkie. They vanish in a flash of static.
Hoopz Barkley is suddenly spit out of the orb, and back onto the Battlefield. I look over to him, to survey the damage. The orb implodes in a poof of helium. Barkley appears to have sustained one minor and one major injury, evidently having been knocked unconscious by the latter. Blood is pouring profusely from Barkley's left foot. Not too bad, just a single foot shot. However, Hoopz is also suffering from a direct shot to the neck, delivered by a master assassin, likely. A pickle appears to have been used as ammunition, sticking out of Barkley's throat, blood pouring profusely out around it.
-- cucumbersTriggerman [CT] began trolling terminalAutocrat [TA] at 19:23 --
CT: Job complete. TA: youre really good at this CT: Payment? TA: ill get it to you soon CT: Good. I'll perform the second one in a bit.
CT: Wishes.
-- cucumbersTriggerman [CT] ceased trolling terminalAutocrat [TA] at 19:28 --
I blink several times, focusing back on Hoopz's neck. That was a wonderful shot.
25/25 Expended.
I channel the energy of my charges out swiftly, and with deliberation.
[AZ] Possessed Armor: 50,000/50,000 x2 HP.
These guys literally have no special abilities as of the current moment. If economical, I use them to block up the Court.
I observe the Scribe's carrying out of the paradoxes and the project as a whole. This… "Uncle Grandpa" character here is really quite abnormal, I think.
I walk over to the Scribe, pulling out a leather glove.
TA: I DEMAND SATISFACTION.
I immediately slap the Scribe's face with the glove, and walk off. Encoded in my statement is a message the Scribe can comprehend clearly. Six days, sundown, dueling pistolwands only.
Actually, Tazz, did you ever provide a description for Calligraphy? Apologies for bothering you, I'd just like to know.
NEW: Spellslinger && Complacency of the Learned (1/???)
(+2 to Generic)
Transience: 25/25! (+1 from Twin) /////////////////////////.
Discord: 24/50 (+1 from Twin, +2 from Amp) //////////////////////////////////////////////////.
NEW: Infinity Mechanism 3/30 (+2 from Crystal) //////////////////////////////.
I did. Just now. Your first post this update, in fact.
...
...
...
Well, I tried to protect the hoop with the Lesser Balloon Whelp. I even healed it. Yay for social traps. This is an example of one (social traps are more commonly known as prisoners' dilemmas). Hm... This is a good lesson in designing these kinds of challenges. Plus, I'm taking Psychology, so I'm going to explain what exactly went wrong.
Very few people guarded the hoop because of diffusion of responsibility and/or social loafing. Challenges like this don't work well with large groups. The players feel little need for individual action when they're in a group so large, and having an entity guard the hoop is solely a punishment (you lose your entity faster). There's no reward to be gained from it. If you want to encourage working together, I'd suggest offering kinds of rewards or incentives.
Current Entities
Commands:
-
Action:
The sun shines brightly, causing a lens flare, even though there aren't any lenses, that obscures Inari. When it passes, she's gone. She seems to spend a few moments in nowhereville before appearing to the side of James and clawing hard at his legs to try and trip him.
Relevance Line:
Just before leaping for another attack, Mikoto paused because he felt a strange sensation. He felt ever so slightly stronger, as if he got a tiny shot of adrenaline. Normally, this would be ideal for dangerous situations like now, but Mikoto knew better. It signified something else, something bad, but not entirely unexpected. To confirm his suspicions, he turned to Inari and asked,
"You feel that thrill of energy too, right?"
Inari nodded slowly.
"You stay here to fight. I have to go make sure Gail is alright."
After rolling her eyes, Inari said,
"Don't you think you're being overprotective? She might not be that strong, but I'm sure she can handle herself for ten min-"
Truesilver Champion: Swinging this sword lets in the holy radiance of the Light, causing its wielder to get healed. Unfortunately, Silver was never very sturdy, though it makes up for that by being blessed. Creatures of the dark should watch out for you now.
A Tactical Genius: 17/50 ==================================================
+2 to Crystal
Bomber sensed a duel was brewing. He quickly pulled out his phone and made a few quick calls with various loud people. Preparations will be underway shortly. "This is going to be TONS of fun!"
Bomber then points his index finger at the ground in front of Hoopz (alternatively Barkley if Hoopz died). A bolt of purple lightning shoots out of his finger and strikes the ground. Hoopz would get cocky, thinking Bomber had missed. Although, Hoopz would soon find that he was sorely mistaken. The earth cracked and began to heave itself upward in front of Hoopz. There was a light but noticeable trembling in the ground. Something was emerging; something large. The shaking became more violently when suddenly something burst out of the ground, scattering dirt and stone everywhere.
A large, dark gray hand had clawed its way out of the earth. Its looked very withered, being nothing more than skin and bones. The end of each finger was coated in a waxy red substance that dribbled off constantly. The hand seemed to "look around", observing the battlefield before it found Hoopz right in front of it. The strange giant hand formed a claw and took a swipe at hoops, the red substance seeming to scar the air as well as Hoopz. The thick crimson liquid left a trail where the hand made its laceration.
Suddenly, the red wax on Hoopz began to spread across his clothes. His arms and legs were covered in the disturbing substance. The substance began to weigh him down, and it slowly became harder to move. The wax eventually began to climb up his neck. Hoopz let out one last cry of alarm before the wax covered him entirely. A red waxy figure that resembled Hoopz took the place of the original, frozen in place. The hand, still present, wiggled its digits. The wax then began to bubble. The reaction suddenly became violent, as the wax visage of Hoopz began to melt. Hoopz, still trapped inside, was being seared by the molten wax. Flesh began to separate from bone, melting along with the red wax. The first part of Hoopz that emerged was his head, which was a disturbing sight. His eyes were gone, and the majority of his facial skin had melted off. The rest of his body was in a similar state; shambles of flesh and muscle hanging off of his bones. The max formed a mound of goop that covered his feet. He just stood there, unmoving; his body limp.
The giant hand waved its goodbyes, flicking globs of the red wax on the ground. It then receded into the earth, leaving as quickly as it had arrived.
Energy Booster && Vitality Booster && Point Booster = Soul Booster (Level 5: 6/6)
Alchemy Complete!
The Soul Booster was a magical stone that increases the vitality, energy, and overall wellness of the holder. While Bomber has no personal use for it as of yet, he can give it to an entity to boost its stats. When the entity dies, the Soul Booster returns to Bomber to use again.
Another alchemy began. Bomber had a few... materials to gather, and this would help him with that.
Death Pact && Spirit Absorber = Soul Repository (1/?)
Bomber can mark an entity with this device. When the entity dies, Bomber gains a soul and stores it within the Soul Repository. Large Enemies can give more. Cannot be used on most bosses or gatekeepers.
No description for the Blacksmith's Briefcase was given, can you fix that? (Weaponsmith's Briefcase > Fine = Blacksmith's Briefcase)
Charges
Project M06-Internationalization (22/50)
Project M07-The Phonetician (4/50)
+2 to Irecreeper
Action
I pull out SCP-4517-DTG and lock it onto Hoopz, or if he is dead Balthios, or if he is dead Charles Barkley himself. Taking an idea from my medley attack near the end of my stay in Godcraft, I rewrite this song to be more MLG... TRACK SELECT: MATRYOSHKA1 2 3 4! The MLG message recedes into my brain,Maybe it will reach my inner scrublord.Certainly I've always been this MLG,A crazy triple 360 noscope! A rekt-ing sung by a headache,The clock's stuck at 4:20 anyway.Don't tell anyone or I'll get kicked from FaZe,Then I wouldn't be very MLG at all. Ah, get it over with,Don't worry about the montage parodies,Ah, how I want to know,what it really means. And anyway, if you'd please, noscope more and more,Калинка? Малинка? Don't be a scrublord!Oh, baby a triple! Get the camera!Can't you tell me, how to be more MLG? Loud and clearly, U WOT M8?FaZe Clan? OpTic Gaming? Just mash those buttons,Someday we'll all be MLG,But anyway, we'll just rek some noobs again
While all this singing is happening, whoever I'm targeting begins ejecting his organs out his mouth while convulsing on the floor. Clap your hands if you think you're a scrub,And listen to my MLG-ish tune.Certainly, I don't care either way,My noscoping skills are melting away Just us, you and me shall we rendezvous?
Rendezvous, shall we rendezvous?Or shall we just go out and rek some scrubs,With a broken walkcycle, 1-3-3-7! Ah, he's exploding,make sure you catch every part of that scrublord,Ah, with all your consoles,1v1 me! And anyway, if you'd please, rek some noobs for me,Калинка? Малинка? Don't be a scrublord! I just can't control my noscopes,Shall we play another round of CoD? You just got rekt so go cry you scrub,OpTic Gaming? FaZe Clan? Just keep noscoping,Wait, wait, wait up, what's going on?
You don't know? What a scrublord you are.
The target is still ejecting his organs out his mouth, detaching them from the surrounding body parts and blood vessels as he ejects them out his mouth. How he is even capable of vomiting his body parts is a mystery, but it probably involves the seizures he's having right now. Just us, you and me shall we rendezvous?
Rendezvous, shall we rendezvous?Or shall we just go out and rek some scrubs,With a broken walkcycle, 1-3-3-7! Lol, scrub, did you just get rekt?Lol, scrub, you just got noscoped!Lol, scrub, even todayI'm still a triple 360 noscoper! Hey, hey, hey, if you'd please, noscope more and more,Калинка? Малинка? Don't be a scrublord!Oh, baby a triple! Get the camera!Can't you tell me, how to be more MLG? Loud and clearly, U WOT M8?FaZe Clan? OpTic Gaming? Just mash those buttons,Someday we'll all be MLG,But anyway, we'll just rek some noobs again
The song closes out with a variety of airhorns and montage parody soundclips as my target finishes ejecting all his organs. I then take a staff and impale every single on of his organs on it.
Entity Action
The Wizard of Yendor will attack any of Barkley's lackeys remaining, or if they're all dead he will attack Barkley himself.
Whoops. Blacksmith's Briefcase: not only is it like the Weaponsmith's Briefcase, it one-ups it by being able to also have all the tools needed to manually create and repair new weapons, and of course, they're magically enchanted to make sure they're better than new.
Quartz Rose && Your Eternal Reward = Medusa's Garden (Level 5: 1/6)
A message to everyone that is not allied with UserZero:
If you are interested I'm going to summon Rugname the final boss of Metal Slug 3, if someone wishes to upgrade it to a [BOSS] I would really appreciate that.
Regards.
The factory will continue the production of Maxis.
All the Maxis will attack Hoopz Barkley.
Charges
Concordant Killer 5/25
Rugname 17/50
Flying Throne > fine = Throne of the Skies (Level 5) 2/6 (Or should I just subtract the difference from the original alchemy?)
Module || stasis field = Module of stasis manipulation 1/?
using Fine on an Alchemy means you have to take it the whole way. You can't subtract the difference, as it's technically different from the Flying throne.
Dance Dance Revolution Haven't You Got Slams In Your Jam: 12/25 (+2 from Fseftr)
+2 to Fseftr
Walker decides to switch what one of his charges will end up being used for, does that really quickly, then moves to stand in front of Valeria. That thing where the opponent becomes terrified at his approach triggers, causing Valeria to have nothing to do but cower and shiver as Walker draws closer and closer... then he stops, wipes his sword, and... stabs the ground?
...
Cue a MASSIVE blade from a statue standing far away from the battlefield descending out of the sky, impaling Valeria from the top of the head straight through into the ground. The blade even has teeth on it, which suddenly activate, causing the sword to simultaneously rip and tear at Valeria's internal organs and skeletal structure while continuing to dig deeper and deeper into the ground. Walker watches, and deciding that it isn't enough, balls his hand into a fist and gouges out Valeria's eyes with his knuckles, before tearing the tendons in her right arm apart merely by grabbing her wrist and yanking hard. He then looks up, and backs away from Valeria, as the hilt draws nearer and nearer to her... once the massive sword can dig no deeper, it promptly sucks up Valeria into the core of the hilt, unintentionally dragging her through a network of gears that crush her body into dust and fragments, spewing her remains out of the top of the hilt in a shower of blood and gore, then exploding, scattering said blood and gore across the battlefield. Walker shrugs, then turns and heads back to the PZ side of the battlefield, ignoring whatever looks he gets of what the hell, man? in a manner that suggests he just doesn't give a damn.
Mercury aligns himself with the moon in the Zerocraft or whatever sky, and this somehow causes many coincidences to happen at once, because of planetary alignment, even though Mercury isn't actually a planet and neither is the moon. The Goblin auto-barber suddenly finds himself falling into a pit of hot tar and feathers, and then a tidal waves hits him, and only him.
9,000 damage to the Goblin auto-barber! It is destroyed swiftly!
Peacetime: Level 3: A staff that gives off a calming vibe. It's powers grow with the level of peace around you, so as it stands its very weak. When it is strong, however, it can do great things.
Iron Forge Hammer: Level 2
Coldheart Hard Drive: Level 1: It's a hard drive that keeps itself very cool.
Holy Flame || Peacetime = Fear No Anvil (Level 10: 0/11)
Low on a charge? Want to have it charged with help from the community?
Well Look no further, at the cost of 1 charge point you can put your charge up for the public to contribute and help build it.
What are you waiting for come on now and crowd fund your charge now!
Term of Use: For every 5 charge put into crowd funded charge, a 1 charge fee is extracted from the crowdfunded charge.
Example
Charge Fund Me:
User 1 (Giant Mech) 1/50
User 2 contributes their 2 charge assists to User 1 Charge fund.
User 1 (Giant Mech) 3/50 +2 from User 2!
Very Simple!
Lets start it out!
Charge Fund Me:
Sigmatw: (Artifact "No 1" ) 0/100 (All charge fees go here as a charge assist)
Now, this would be SO useful, if this wasn't already a thing and basically useless, so no, 'Charge Funding' is not going to be a thing. That's basically asking for Charges, with you getting an arbitrary fee. That's completely unreasonable.
I find your lack of update disturbing... Then again, you have to go through with college and this at the same time. It's like trying to headshot two Scouts at the same time with the Machina! I don't blame you for the lack of updates. I don't have much to go through. My conditions's like trying to collateral a Soldier and a Pyro that's shooting Detonator flares at you, who are both strafing, but the Soldier doesn't notice you.
...This metaphor got mangled at some point. I get it, but still.
The End Sale && Machina && Redstone = The Hard Bargain (Level 5: 6/6)
((I guess i'll make more (bad) jokes. I heard that helps.))
Seneca throws King Bob-Omb down a mountain. Once he jumps up the mountain again out of habit, he gets sniped with the Hard Bargain.
SeNeCa14: So i heard you liked getting thrown around. Don't look at me like that King Robert! It's all in good murderous fun.
-
+2 to Proof
The Hard Bargain: You will give your enemies an offer they can't refuse with this weapon-a one way ticket to Limbo, sponsored by Redstone-poisoned Enderate (like Jarate but from the End), which will do a combo of electrocute you AND make you teleport about the place randomly!
the Heavy Fists Guy tanks for him! 6,000 damage to the Heavy Fists Guy!
Salt 10/50 (+2 from Bomber)
+2 to Erelye.
==Action==
Crystal points his hand at Barkley, firing off a massive bolt of lightning. He then encases Barkley in a block of ice, before dropping the ice into lava. The ice melts and leaves Barkley in a massive pit of lava and boiling water, searing him to the bone.
==Entities==
Storm will use Aeolian Scream, targeting Hoopz and Balthios. If one is dead, Storm will instead target the non-dead one with Storm-Threnody. Stone will use The Fire Sermon on Barkley.
Balthios intervenes with elemental control to stop the Lightning, Ice and Lava.
AA uses the Redstone Magic Scepter to heal the Soul of the Core's wounds. The Soul uses Wildfire on the Stone, Neo Ultima, and Valeera, Gravity Falls on the Storm, and Terminus on the Uncreativity Monster (if all three cannot be used this turn, push back to next turn).
Two can-Terminus must be used on its own. You heal the Soul of the Core for 3,000 HP. He'll do everything else you say and just bite the Uncreativity monster.
I have some blueprints for a portal that vvill summon us a butt-load of povverful (albeit edgy, teenage [and thus rebellious], and likely to kill us {or some of us idk} but hey they might attack userzer0 before us so let's just hope for the best) entities!
Now I must vvarn you, It might be a gamble. As these things are degenerate teenage hooligans who are OOZING eDgE
And i'm allergic to that stuff (kinda)
They might change sides at random
because they have a "complex character"
And by that I mean "confusing as Primate character"
Ha...
I'm just gonna
do the thing
Portal to the mary sue realm: 1/30
Hoo boy. this ought to be interesting.
The Crimson Smog makes the Hatred of Formatting take 8,000 damage and skip it’s action!
The newly summoned Possessed Armors and Zineous get ready to defend the Hoop! They won’t be able to do anything except full-time guard unless they have double/triple/xtuple action, as a reminder.
The Demon Portal spits out…Two Imps! What, you were expecting something dramatic immediately? That’s not until you take too much time to kill it. One is a shifty fellow who can only be targeted with AoE-the other is on-fire and appears to be much more direct.
The world’s Most Beautiful Thing keeps fawning over itself like a big ol’ Narcissist. A very beautiful Narcissist. The Wizard of Yendor Wands Balthios for 15,000 damage! The CSI Cyber investigations are getting nowhere fast. The Solar Monolith gives a Shield to both Possessed Armors and Zineous! Humanibli idles for now (he still got summoned), not wanting to provoke a fight. The Soul of the Core uses Wildfire Waltz, and breathes a mighty gush of lava out of it! Don’t even ask how this works, because I simply do not know! In any case, Valeera, Stone and Neo Ultima are swept up into the resulting magma storm, and safe to say they do not re-emerge unscathed…Stone takes 10,000 damage because she’s basically a stone golem, the other two take 25,000 damage and are Severely Burned, which means they take Damage over time and have a half-chance of not being able to act at all! They also take a stack of Gravcrush-remember, 5 stacks and they’re dead!
Doge respawns, but isn’t able to do anything. Crocodibli deals 4,500 damage to Mibibli, as usual! The Captain roars, pounds his chest, and proceeds to bodyslam the Hatred of Formatting for 30,000 damage!
The Blue Horrors spit out a load of projectiles, but they’re hitting a lot less than the Pink Horrors did…Well, relatively, anyways. 65,000 damage to Balthios, obliterating him utterly! Barkley roars at the loss of his last teammate; the Hoop is repairing, so his next targets are clear. Valeera fights through the burning after gaining her 3rd Mana to draw, unload a Fan of Knives to 3,000 damage to all PZ entities except Walker, and drawing a card! However, she takes 5,000 damage from the Severe Burn! The Uncreativity Monster Uncreatively starts Uncreating the Heavy Fists Guy to lower his HP by 5,000! His Overcharge HP goes down by 5,000 as well…Which Neo Ultima would have shaved further for some reason, but his Severe Burning gets in the way, and deals him 5,000 damage! Storm, having neither Hoopz nor Balthios to target, opts to join his ‘relative’ and attacks Barklye for Storm-Threnody, dealing 20,000 damage to Barkley! Her Sister, Stone, generates a Clay Man and joins in with The Fire Sermon for 18,000 damage!
The Factory produces one Maxis E344, ready to go! Arina Azuma, very heavily nerfed (sadly), is still able to fight and lasers the Heavy Fists Guy for 2,000 damage! Uncle Grandpa takes the Pretzel Elemental and the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken for a ride through nonexistence land, making them both take 13,000 damage! He makes sure the Scribe notices the odd Car Keys on the Ornate Sword as well…You ought to press those at your earliest convenience.
The King Bob-Omb readies The Final Countdown gearing up for a super-powerful attack! Gearing up being the key words; He turns red, grows in size considerably (the Heavy fists Guy can’t guard him anymore), and his fuse starts burning! If that runs out, well…You don’t need me to say what’ll happen, right? Destroy him, quickly! He’ll detonate in 2 turns!
The Heavy Fists Guy takes 2,000 damage from Poison, and decides to guard the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken. Mibibli fires more Psychic missiles at Crocidibli for 4,500 damage (because he’s minicritting)! The Abnormally Larged Voidtouched chicken practices his newfound ability to see clearly in front of him to give a precise peck to storm for 15,000 damage! The Pretzel Elemental blasts a beam of pure salt to fuel a salt truck that runs over The Captain for 1 damage!
Barkley, only having one action and not having his usual double-action, decides to make the most of this situation and dribbles right through the Blue Horrors, smashing them with the pure force of the dribble at every opportunity! The Blue Horrors find that 5 of their number have met their end.
Richard +2s Doctor Shiny and Talist, and throws Barkley a basketball! Barkley’s already carrying two, so he prepares to dribble it with his head. This turns out to not be a wise idea as it was actually a pressure-activated bomb that blew up right in his face for 30,000 damage!
UserZero +2s all PZ players, and swiftly creates a replica of Peach’s Castle and gets back into her Peach cosplay from before, and then changes whatever feature she can to become an exact replica of her! Why? Uh, well it might just be to mislead you, as that castle suddenly gains about 5 million guns and fires them at the Blue Horrors, destroying 10, as well as Azuma, killing her immediately, and Storm, for 90,000 damage! She somehow shoves that in her inventory afterwards.
Terrain: Pavement (really flat, but has no standard effect)
Weather: Crimson Smog (Fear effect and 8,000 damage to random entity per turn): [|||||]
[???] Basketball Hoop: Invulnerable, kind of. Does damage to all Non-PZ entities when things are thrown into it. Guarded by: 3/3 (Zineous, 2 Possessed Armors) Repairs: [||]
[H] Demon Portal: 80,000/80,000 HP. Summons two random demons each turn.
[H] Blood Imp: 5,000/5,000 HP. Cannot be directly targeted, can only be damaged by AoE. Grants an allied Hostile +5,000 HP (current and max) per turn!
[H] Flame Imp: 20,000/20,000 HP.
[N] World's Most Beautiful Thing: 1/1 HP. Cannot be attacked. Whoever AoE kills it gets mobbed for a turn by everything until the perputratior is dead. Barkley's dunks are exceptions.
[N] Wizard of Yendor: 122,000/122,000 HP. Summon Nasties: [|||] Aggrivate Monsters: [|||] Double-Trouble: [|||||] Action: Attack one of Barkley's lackies, or Barkley himself if they're gone.
[N] SWAT Team: 10,000/10,000 HP x3 (+1) Defends the CSI Cyber Investigation Team and Cyber Portal.
[N] CSI Cyber Portal: 20,000 HP. summons a SWAT team each turn.
[N] CSI Cyber Investigation Team. Can possibly find evidence. Arrest Warrent: [||||||||||]
[N] Humanibli: 50,000/50,000 HPx3. Gains damaged as he's killed. Entities must not be invincible to damage him!
[N] Solar Monolith: 75,000/75,000 HP. Projects up to 3 Shields on entities. Action: Give a Shield to every Entity defending the Hoop!
[N-BOSS] Soul of the Core: Heads: 38,900/100,000 HP x2; 41,900/100,000 HP x1; Body: 1,500,000/1,455,800 HP. Body has high defense. Body occasionally sucks in attacks not aimed at it. Triple-Action while all heads are alive; double action if two are alive. Inflicts Gravcrush on all entities it attacks/is attacked by. Wildfire Waltz: [|||] Gravity Falls: [||||] Terminus: [|||||] Takes reduced damage from Player actions while atomicAmiable is active; Takes reduced damage from Entity actions while antimatterAugry is active. Actions: Use Wildfire Waltz on Stone, Neo Ultima and Valeera, use Gravity Falls on Storm, and bite Terminus.
[GS] Doge: 0/5,000 HP (does not attack unless an entity on its team is attacked first, will bodyguard for allies, respawns 1 round after death if there are still allied entities present). Will Guard the Hoop if any Defenders die.
[GS] The Captain: 14/20 HP.
[GS] Crocidibli: 85,500/95,000. Targets Mibibli nigh-exclusively until death. Won't die unless Death Conditions are met. Levitator Enforcer: [||||]
[AZ] Blue Horrors: 5,000/5,000 x23. Attack individually, but have REALLY low accuracy. Each Pink Horror (or two Blue Horrors) add a charge to Bolt of Change. Bolt of Change: [||||||||||][||||||||||][||||||||||][||||||||||] (This is one charge, just split into units of 10 for easy measure.)
[AZ] Valeera: 155,000/200,000 HP. Mana: 3/10. Gains +1 Mana at the START of each turn. HAND: (3) Shattered Sun Cleric, (5) Assassin's Dagger, (1) Deadly Poison, (5) Assassination, (3) Ironfur Grizzly. Sleuthhack: [||||] Severe Burn: [|||]Gravcrush: [|||||]
[AZ] Uncreativity Monster: 75,000/67,500 HP. Decays by 10K HP until at max HP value. Gains HP with Uncreative attacks aimed at it.
[AZ] Zineous: 210,000/210,000 HP. Action: Defend the Hoop! )
[AZ] Possessed Armors: 50,000/50,000 HP x2. Action: Defend the Hoop! ))
[PZ] King Bob-Omb: 147,000/150,000 HP. Detonation: [||]
[PZ] Heavy Fists Guy who Just Ate Chocolate: 59,500/125,000 HP. Can only attack in retaliation! Guarding the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken. Poisoned: [||]
[PZ] Mibibli: 3,000/20,000 (x4). Targets Crocidibli nigh-exclusively until death. Won't die unless Death Conditions are met. The Mibible: [||||||||]
[PZ] Hatred of Formatting: 114,000/125,000 HP. More likely to dodge if an attack has formatting.
[PZ] Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken: 172,000/200,000 HP. Has Sure Aim!
[PZ] Pretzel Elemental: 34,000/50,000 HP. Everyone except Richard is hesitant to damage it.
[PZ] Walker: 14/20 HP. Respawns 1 Round after death.
[-GATEKEEPER-][PZ-BOSS] Charles Barkley: 220,500/400,000 HP. While alive, all PZs minicrit! Double-Action. If he successfully scores a goal on the Basketball Hoop, deals his damage to all non-PZ entities! Verboten Jam: [||] Chaos Dunk: [||||||||||]
[AZ-γ] Godmodder477: 40/50 HP.
[GM] UserZero: 138/150 HP. Behind the Barrier-invulnerable.
Distance to Yggdrasil: 4500. Locked until the Gatekeeper is slain!
The Armory (in the spoilers)
[||||] The Power Cleaner: INACTIVE. Owner: Bomber57 [AZ]
Alright Tazz. I will write a more organized response tomorrow (writing a response at midnight tends to just make things worse).
PS: I suggest a post limit of 50 to avoid issues with update overload, I had to do it once when I left for 2 days on my forum game and 5 pages piled up.
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Location:
0rgin P0int, Zeroth Server
Join Date:
2/28/2011
Posts:
63
Location:
why
Minecraft:
User_Zero
Xbox:
Battlefury13
PSN:
no
Member Details
/null
A post limit does sound like a good idea.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
"THIS IS EQUAL PARTS FUNNY AND SAD."
"STOP LAUGHING AND KILL THE BUNNY!"
"YOU'RE GETTING QUOTED ON THAT ONE, CALLING IT NOW. WHY ARE YOU LOSING IT OVER ONE ENEMY ANYWAY?"
"I DON'T KNOW! THERE'S A BLANK SCREEN WHENEVER I PERFORM A MEMORY SEARCH! NOTHING SHOWS UP!"
Potato kick-stater salad(a potato made of salad kick-starter.)14/25(or 18 if the helping effect works)
The damaged blasting pages && Damaged Transmutation field alternator 5/6 Damaged Warp Zone
my items
The Reinforcement level 1
Damaged The blasting pages level -1
Damaged Transmutation field alternator level -1
Book of support level 2
Then I explain that a HLM is a kind of building which have no military interest at all(looks like cubic buildings made for putting humans into rooms) but that it was only to see if the reinforcement had this kind of powers.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
"THIS IS EQUAL PARTS FUNNY AND SAD."
"STOP LAUGHING AND KILL THE BUNNY!"
"YOU'RE GETTING QUOTED ON THAT ONE, CALLING IT NOW. WHY ARE YOU LOSING IT OVER ONE ENEMY ANYWAY?"
"I DON'T KNOW! THERE'S A BLANK SCREEN WHENEVER I PERFORM A MEMORY SEARCH! NOTHING SHOWS UP!"
OK, massive disappointment, but I can't make the EoTBdop today. It was just busy and I got distracted-I'll admit. No-one is more dissapointed than I am in that regard. I CAN find the time to do this-I'm not making it up-BUT when I'm trying to do it is the real problem, I think, so that'll be changed up. expect earlier updates, like around 4-5 EST instead of 8-9 EST. Scheduling is the problem on my end, I think, and if I can fix that properly...Well, updates will flow again!
In any case, I AM still nulling pre-EoTB posts, you know? It's not a COMPLETE update until the EoTB is there! (If any attacks wind up nulled, feel free to repeat them in a non-null post, because I'm not a jerk like that.)
+1 to ALL charges as immediate compensation. If the update doesn't come tomorrow you may kick my rear end for it.
I apologize for how long that took-it just SHOULDN'T have, but it did. Again, +1 to all of your charges as compensation. I'm reasonably confident in my ability to keep updates on-track from here-on, that was just a major slip up on my part (and IRL life getting in the way). So, here's to hoping DTG0 updates come on smoothly from here!
The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Location:
0rgin P0int, Zeroth Server
Join Date:
2/28/2011
Posts:
63
Location:
why
Minecraft:
User_Zero
Xbox:
Battlefury13
PSN:
no
Member Details
"Edgy teenagers? Just make sure they don't brutally kill us/me. Please. i HATE Edge."
i summon the Titanic to fall on Charles Barkley. it is filled with explosives that explode when it hits the ground.
Factory of stuff 11/25 (2+ from tazz)
A monkey's paw 8/20 (2+ from tazz)
2+ to cyangynist
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
"THIS IS EQUAL PARTS FUNNY AND SAD."
"STOP LAUGHING AND KILL THE BUNNY!"
"YOU'RE GETTING QUOTED ON THAT ONE, CALLING IT NOW. WHY ARE YOU LOSING IT OVER ONE ENEMY ANYWAY?"
"I DON'T KNOW! THERE'S A BLANK SCREEN WHENEVER I PERFORM A MEMORY SEARCH! NOTHING SHOWS UP!"
Attack that got left to the wayside last turn, unfocused. (Next attack is the focused one)
43/50 Dark Bowser (+1 from Dark, +1 from Tazz)
4/50 Charging something! Get ready to pray! (Yes, I know what I’m charging. Guess!) (+1 from Tazz_)
+2 Pit
Lens of Truth && Spoon Bender (Binding of Isaac) 3/?? (Still need a comment on the charge length and output)
"What was that you said, Uzi?when you have a 100% winrate, that's NOT n00bishness, that's not suicidal overconfidnece, that's FACT.
Well, one of us is going to end our streak. Though I've had help when my enemies also had it, I've never lost a straight up duel with no powers (I include the Veil in powers). I've dealt with those who've received Diaboli Ex Machina to help them beat me. They still lose. In short, this isn't going to be easy for either of us, so I'd appreciate you start taking us seriously.
Oh well. Situation Normal: Gorilla'd up beyond all recognition."
Also, Richard may be a bit of an idiot, way too scared of a certain musical instrument, and may be a massive troll, but at least he can spell correctly! I'm almost certain Tazz doesn't have the red lines under the words that are misspelled.
Attack 4: The Video Game Diner
I order everything on this menu for Charles Barkley to eat. Unfortunately, this version of the Video Game Diner runs on real world logic, and gives him massive food poisoning, instead of its normal in game effect.
I take a number of players to the Video Game Diner where everything tastes delicious, as well. I'm a good caterer, what can I say! (Note: These are players, not entities, this isn't going to heal. I'm just being nice)
Appetizers:
Toad in the ____ (Banjo-Tooie)
Grilled Fuzzy (Touch Fuzzy, get Dizzy!/Yoshi’s Island)
Salad of Evil with Rage Dressing (Partners in Time)
Bad Movie Tie-in Soup (So many things, but E.T. was the first)
Clams dipped in Grunt Blood (HALO)
Rushed Game Chili Dogs (SEGA WHEN WILL YOU LEARN/Sonic)
Turkey Leg embedded in Dracula’s Castle Wall (Castlevania)
Sandvich, with optional Mustard of your Doom (TF2+Superstar Saga)
Fried Goldeen (Really?)
Military Rations, with physics defying battery-restoring mushrooms (MGS)
Laser-Baked Chicken (Duck Game)
Millenia-old Fruit for literal days (Pikmin)
Portal to the Meat Dimension (Persona 4)
Yeto’s Soup, Eat it all for a free meal! (Twilight Princess)
Dessert:
The Cake, made to Blue Personality Core recipe (Again, REALLY?)
Lava Cookie (Pokemon, again)
Moogle Pie (Final Fantasy)
Couple’s Cake, made from cooking two bunnies together (Super Paper Mario)
Roast Whacka Bump (Paper Mario, again)
Chunko-Honey Candy Bar (Deus Ex)
Invincibility Lollipops (Guaranteed to cause a sugar rush/Kirby)
"Free" Candy (Candy Crush)
Golden Banana Split (Donkey Kong)
Floor Ice Cream (Kid Icarus)
Doc Louis' Chocolate Bar (Nintendo and the Video Game Diner are not responsible for any damage caused by Doc Louis taking revenge for his Chocolate Bar/Punchout!!)
Drinks:
Grandma’s Homemade Elixer (Wind Waker)
Fus Ro Mead (And, say it with me, REALLY???!?!?!?!?)
Health Potion (So many things)
“Love” Potion (Sims)
Bucket o’ Milk (Minecraft)
I don't know what it is, but the alcohol level is waaaaaay too high for beer (GTA V)
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
No matter who wins, this can't end well...people like you should be burning in...you know, that place.
Balthios, Hoopz and Barkley jointly behead you before you can lay a tooth on any of the Basketballs! They're very vicious in beating you down, though, so the next attack against Barkley will be a guaranteed hit.
Humanibli summoned!
Humanibli taps you on the shoulder and says that the Narrative forced him to give the pass to the Descendants until the vauge date of 'When Charles Barkley is dead,' but everything else isn't invincible. Well, good to know that Player Vulnerability is coming back AFTER the boss that can field wipe you is dead!
5,000 damage to Balthios!
Balthios uses his powers over Corrosion to make the liquid fly into your eyes instead! Tea || RNGesus Shrine = Lucky Tea (Level 5: 1/6)
Anvil On Stick With Pottery Shards Attached && Anti-Roleplay Essence = Anti-Roleplayer's Halberd (Level 25: 1/26)
Considering how many people RP, that weapon would be instantly fatal to pretty much everything that's actually a threat.
Olimar's Whistle >Fine 1/? = Olimar's Flute (Level 4: 1/5)
The Hatred of Formatting sues you for false advertising. There's barely any formatting at all for it to rage at!
You immediately realize why this place was abandoned almost the instant you enter.
First, the roots of Yggdrasil itself are much larger than the tree, surprisingly-reaching out even thousands of blocks. You can already see the structural damage. But then, there's the whispering. The walls, the ceiling, the floor, everywhere around you-noise. Noise noise noise noise noise. Whispers of madness in eldritch tongues.
You could imagine why the T.A.T. decided to get out of here, this place would have driven them insane.
Calzerb is dead!
1 damage! The Captain isn't a Godmodder... Diamond Murder Knife: Literally the Golden Murder Knife, but with diamonds instead. This does technically mean the knife is, more accurately, spouting off lava.
70,000 damage to Hoopz!
Walker is immune to AoE for the most part. He has to be targeted.
She'll do that stuff.
The problem is, a freaking French Fry (SINGULAR-may have been a chicken fry but that's not an issue, and it was from Burger King) is the strongest healing item in Gaiden. The second-strongest is GREASEY DEW from said fry. If Food Heals and a Fry did that much HP healing, It's safe to say that Barkley was probably starving that badly, and was probably only nourished by pure Basketball energies for a LONG while (to say nothing of the fact this version of Barkley is 89 at least). Because he was thereafter happy because he actually ate a freaking meal in the first time for a long time that didn't taste horrible, unless you literally forced the drink down his throats (and you didn't), he wouldn't have gotten drunk at all because he would probably have been more healthy than he ever was in his life. Video Game Logic.
And B-Ball energies. Let us not forget the B-Ball energies. And the Godmodding from UserZero.
come to think of it, yeah, there probably was more going on than obvious.
Your counter-Godmod nevertheless strains his B-Ball energies to the point where he cannot do double-action this turn!
5,000 damage to Barkley! You then feed Charles Barkley bread! After all, bread is pain (in french)! It is at this point that his metabolism is taxed and he takes 5,000 more damage.
4,000 damage to Hoopz!
SCP-109 && Reinforced Hose1 && High-Pressure Pump2 = Pump Them Up (Level 4: 1/5)
SCP-2223-A figurine && Tallow Golem = Magical Anime Girl Golem (Level 9: 1/10)
Magical Anime Girl Golem: Hrm, gee, this isn't exactly what it says on the tin, is it? Why, it is! The Magical Anime Girl Golem is a Magical Girl that looks ripped straight from a 3D anime. The kicker is that it can actually use magic, has Anime Physics backing it up, and it's also very steadfastly loyal to its crafter. The only issue is the unfortunate implications associated with it.
14,000 damage to Balthios!
Richard stops you, because really, do you want MORE field wiping now? Unless you're Neutral, but even then that's just straight-up insane at this stage.
Uh, what is an HLM?
I'll say you probably do need a break. If it's not fun, don't do it, I say. I'll be the first to advocate for the game, but I'll be the first to advocate against playing it if need be. 8,000 damage to the ALVC!
You guard Charles Barkley from the next two attacks!
20,000 damage to Hoopz! Hoopz is horrifically murdered!
...Forgot this.
Calligraphy: A black-feather pen, dripping with fresh ink at all times. It has a will all of its own and will write a rune no matter what it is, on the spur of the moment. Each time this is used, you roll 5d5 to determine what sort of madness you've just unleashed with this pen.
They're so high-velocity that the air around them incinerates, turning into Plasma (because Plasma is superheated Air).
Balthios manages to sidestep the beam after taking 6,000 damage!
UserZero relishes the opportunity given to her, as you manage to succeed in this endavor. Richard is open to attack from UserZero as he tries to figure out which UserZero is and isn't real!
He points out that he chose the 19 of Tuxedos, not the 17, so it's the right answer, thus you are forced into the choice instead. Fortunately for you, Buzzsaw Death Land turned out to have a non-indicative name and it actually was a bit of a deathmetal theme park. Generic Minecraft Bow && Richard Themed Designer Bow = Extreme Bow (Level 30: 1/31)
I feel sorry for you right now. I just do. I know your pain.
Your spells reveal an immense orange-blue pulse from Charles Barkely, a pulse that is, much more lightly, stored within every Basketball, or B-Ball. Apparently, playing Basketball well generates more B-Ball energies and makes you a better player (in addition to just getting good naturally). No illusions are involved, you see Barkley exactly as he is, as are his Basketballs. The standard Basketballs are, well, made exactly as you think they are. Barkley's two are different: The orange one is apparently made to sap B-Ball energies, and still itself contains so much that improper handling could unleash a Chaos Dunk. Meanwhile, the Blue One is made of pure Slamicite and Jamicite, materials that improve a Baller's skills to their absolute limits, and was made at a time ancient to begin the sport. For reasons of sanity, let's assume the Larvae didn't survive but the Factory did. The Zerg were, relatively, a pain to work with compared to a simple factory on my end, and really most of the Zerg was dead that turn anyways. You wouldn't have been able to mutate Croach in time for the Larvae to mutate into Drones then create new Hatcheries, and the Larvae need Croach to live. Production will begin on the Maxis E344. Unfortunately, it won't come out until next turn and can't be ordered until the turn after that.
It is not the Module of ?, it is literally named, in its entirety, "?". That being said it really only allows for flight like you probably expected.
4,000 damage to the ALVC!
The Staff refuses to cooperate.
30,000 damage to Charles Barkley!
Multi-Bladed Lightsaber: Think of a lightsaber that has five blades. In any other weapon this would be supremely impractical, though the cutting power of this Lightsaber does it justice. Sadly, Lightsabers do carry weight (it's actually kind of hard to explain), so it requires some extra strength to wield. You can extend how close/far the blades are with a dial on the side.
Balthios turns you back with the Elemental Power of Apes!
I wonder as well. The irony of it is, the Soul of the Core would be considerably more well-off if Serpent was playing considerably more aggressively, though that could just be me.
3,000 HP to the most damaged head of the Soul of the Core! 5,000 damage to Barkley!
Solar Monolith Summoned! It'll do as you say.
Airstrike Beacon && TM25 = Bring the Thunder (Level 9: 1/10)
Perhaps the Airstrike Beacon is just much too powerful as a base component?
Blow Gun && TM13 (Gen2) = Big Noise (Level 1: 1/2)
5,000 damage to the Goblin Auto-Barber, which has no hair at all as it's a robot. Easy to see how that accident could happen.
You club Crocidibli for 2,000 damage! Techncially, the GS are enemies...
I will say it now: I do contact the RNG whenever Paradoxes come into play, a D10000 for every Paradox. 4 in this case due to how powerful it was. 1 is the worst result, while 10000 is the best, and this is strictly in relationship to the person who rolled it.
In order from lowest to highest, here are the results: 3391, 4333, 6032, and 9792.
Uncle Grandpa Successfully summoned, but he's already lost an HP from the Paradoxes, so he's down to 9/10 HP! Meanwhile, various things fall out of the sky: A pair of goggles lands on the ALVC, giving it Sure Aim (meaning it can't miss now!); A Slightly Ornate Iron Sword (Level 2) falls right in front of you, planting itself 2 inches into the ground; and finally, on this Slightly Orante Iron Sword is a pair of what is apparently Car keys, labeled 'Bad Jokes are worse through Repetition.' You get an urge to click its one button-its big and red, but you're assured that it is, indeed, something amazing.
DO NOT PANIC, THE UPDATE RESPONSE SECTION HAS BEEN MERELY CUT IN TWO.
/null
Post for updop splitting.
Nothing here other than that.
0rigin Point.
Avatar by TwinBuilder.
TO ANYONE CONFUSED BY CRYSTAL: The forum somehow merged my posts, but it wouldn't let me update if the posts were merged, so I had him null that so they wouldn't auto-merge. I didn't even know they could do that.
You join the GS faction!
Double-bladed battleaxe, one blade head on each end of the handle && Laser Gun && Accursed Flamethrower && Bright Ruby && Flaming Emerald = Dual Destruction Mk. 1 (Lv. 5, 1/6)
Frozen Wand && Lively Essence && Mystical Ice Leaf = Everwhite Mk. 1 (Lv. 3, 1/4)
2,000 damage to Balthios!
OK, Crusher48, I will answer those questions. I will attribute some of what you said in this post to bad management of mechanics on my part-but I will also say that it was bad entity management on part of your fellow players and really, I could TELL this turn was an incoming disaster from a mile away. I will say that Verboten Jam is only a field wipe if Barkley gets access to the Hoop-and he did. Otherwise it is strictly single-target.
But enough of that. Crusher48, I have a question for you. For some, this question was a long time coming and it could wait no longer. For me, its only recently that I realize that this isn't a disproportionate response to the situation regarding you. And, YES, there is a situation.
This is going to be a question that you will answer truthfully and fully, and you will not hide behind any In-Character Justification, or my status as a fresh, new GM who's kind of poor at balancing (I'M TRYING!), because by all due intents and purposes I know at least a THIRD of the playerbase (all names anonymous) who have a confirmed chip on your shoulder for your basic attitude towards this game, which can be summarized in a single term by one member: MUNCHKIN. Aka, basically playing the game to WIN, and not actually have fun in any form EXCEPT to win, at all costs, no matter the detriment to the experience you create to others. Munchkins are one of the most toxic things I could ever think of in my life. For a Munchkin, to win, everything is fair play: Minmaxing, cheating, the most absurd Rules Lawerying, anything. This is basically Godmodding within the bounds of rules, so basically it's as close to Godmodding as you can get. In other words, you are exhibiting traits of exactly the kind of person that TT2K himself was trying to mock (and have beaten up) when releasing this game, the exact kind of person who would be a godmodder, and your behavior in these games as of recent has been a great reason why the Godmodders have never been a good person. I cannot legitimately name a time when you've been legitimately pleased in this game, and indeed, most of the time you've been whining because of some RIDICULOUSLY OP thing you did was noped because it was, in fact, RIDICULOUSLY OP. When it wasn't this, it was entity mechanics (and though I will say Barkley wasn't supposed to have it that easy, I will ALSO say that Barkley field wiping you was more of an expectation than a threat on my part-future Gatekeepers won't be so ridiculous in generating wipes that fast, but if they can make you wipe, they almost certainly will).
If you refuse to answer this question or do not give an answer that I find satisfactory, or if you do not follow up on your answer in a way I find satisfactory (and I would like to think I am reasonably generous about this), you will be banned from the game-OUTRIGHT BANNED-due to your Toxic attitude and endless whining about balancing in a game where the balancing is still in its most prototypical stages-this is quite literally the first serious boss. I am NOT Twin-I am FULLY willing to ban you due to very poor behavior, and that you established the GS faction will not be any bartering chip here. I consider the GS faction to be more of an idea that a lot of people had that you brought to the surface, and that people joined proved you weren't the only one with that idea. speaking of not being alone in ideas, I am NOT alone in this thought that you ought to be outright banned from DTG-a third of your fellow players, at least, are of a like mind, which is why I'm making this.
My question is, Are you honestly going to improve yourself? because, let it be said, I have brought a great deal of evidence to the table that outright says that attitude needs to improve, or you shut yourself out of Destroy the Godmodder for, basically, a year, not counting other games.
Your posts will not be counted until I get an answer from you. The post can be null or PM'd for sake of time/reducing clutter. I'll give it a read-over and decide from there.
Before you even THINK of chewing me out over this-I was very tempted to just outright ban you on the spot at this point. I'm giving you a chance. I'd like to think I'm reasonable, and I admit that I'm my worst critic (for I misjudge myself), but you are testing the limits of my patience unlike every other player thus far, and responses to you have been one of the reasons these updates get so long sometimes, because those times, your posts DO require a level of reading through to explain exactly why your OP and highly disruptive action simply isn't going to fly.
4,000 damage to Balthios!
Blocked stopped Walker, who wisely decided that he didn't want get between the Waffle Sorcerors and Barkley.
Crimsony Blood Gem: A gem holding the power of the Crimson. It changes regular stone to Crimstone and make the Crimson spread and such, and gives you control over standard Crimson mobs. Giving it blood grants it more power.
They'll do as you say...But who's Azuma?
Your action doesn't do anything.
Criticsquid was already summoned in the 1st and 2nd games, and can't be resummoned. Sorry! Plus, that's 3 charges out of the two you are allowed (Alchemies are separate), so consider it good riddance.
Balthios attacks you before you can damage Barkley!
Hoopz shoots you mid-procedure, before the painful bits.
Katana && Shamir = Absurdly Sharp Blade (Level 1: 1/2)
Stopped by Walker!
They will do as you say.
Minicritted 13,500 damage to Barkley!
Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad: This Sketchpad houses the power of completely Unfair Super Paper Mario. Unwinnable bosses, unsolvable puzzles, easy! It's only passable due to a series of glitches and exploits in space-time.
Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad && Mario 64 = Super Unfair Paper Mario Maker Sketchpad 64 (level 5: 2/6)
Hylian Beam Shield (Cool): This Hylian Beam shield is a cooler variant on the original, and also more quickly equipped in case of emergency.
Nether Portal && (End Portal Frame && Shrink Ray) = Pocket Dimension (Level 2: 1/3)
I heard you chatting about how you were going to use Two summons to summon the same entity, and this IS under 50 posts of charge, so the Crystal is expended and Zineous is summoned! He will do as you say.
It was never said she couldn't brainwash charged summons, just that she CAN brainwash Uncharged summons. Plus, that's literally a one-post charge, which is effectively an instant action. Henceforth, she drags it to her side. Lesser Pretzel Elemental summoned!
I SHOULD have specified: In the future, Bosses will not have gimmicks that will lead to turn 2 wipes; I have not said that there will not be wipes to bosses, especially Gatekeepers. However, this boss invoked Prisoner's Dilemma a little too hard, so it's specifically the Prisoner's Dilemma kind of thing that's being avoided. If you're not careful, Gatekeeper wipes can happen again. In a way, the fact Barkley wiped you was good, as it taught YOU how powerful and dangerous Gateekeepers are, though Barkley's case may have been exaggerated because of the turn 2 wipe. Granted, I will also say this: The next one's mechanic is MUCH less likely to cause wipes in general, and doesn't have as much high-maintenance as Barkley does.
Kanohi Hau Nuva (Level 5): You explained that best. This mask can be upgraded still if you find an Alchemiter upgrade to improve level.
A lot has happened, most recently a large field wipe taking out all but the most recent Entities. The Alchemiter is basically the same as before.
I did. Just now. Your first post this update, in fact.
Possessed Armors summoned! They'll do as you say.
You know what, I couldn't agree more. I'll take this into account for any challenge that might be in the future.
8,000 damage! (this is counting the Focus Bonus, you know.)
Terraria Fleeting Lava Charm && Sunstone = Blast Protection Charm
Blast Protection Charm || Conversion Scales = Sun Charm (Level 4: 1/5).
Truesilver Champion: Swinging this sword lets in the holy radiance of the Light, causing its wielder to get healed. Unfortunately, Silver was never very sturdy, though it makes up for that by being blessed. Creatures of the dark should watch out for you now.
Soul Booster: You said it already!
Death Pact && Spirit Absorber = Soul Repository (Level 8: 1/9)
Balthios channels the elements to protect Barkley from the bullets!
Whoops. Blacksmith's Briefcase: not only is it like the Weaponsmith's Briefcase, it one-ups it by being able to also have all the tools needed to manually create and repair new weapons, and of course, they're magically enchanted to make sure they're better than new.
Quartz Rose && Your Eternal Reward = Medusa's Garden (Level 5: 1/6)
17,000 damage to Balthios!
Welcome!
using Fine on an Alchemy means you have to take it the whole way. You can't subtract the difference, as it's technically different from the Flying throne.
Module || (neutrino && metallic box && laser beam generator) = Module of quantum manipulation (neutrinos) (Level 9: 1/10) 1/?
Module || stasis field = Module of stasis manipulation (level 4: 1/5)
15,000 damage to Valeera!
9,000 damage to the Goblin auto-barber! It is destroyed swiftly!
Ho hum.
Ho hum.
Now, this would be SO useful, if this wasn't already a thing and basically useless, so no, 'Charge Funding' is not going to be a thing. That's basically asking for Charges, with you getting an arbitrary fee. That's completely unreasonable.
...This metaphor got mangled at some point. I get it, but still.
The Hard Bargain: You will give your enemies an offer they can't refuse with this weapon-a one way ticket to Limbo, sponsored by Redstone-poisoned Enderate (like Jarate but from the End), which will do a combo of electrocute you AND make you teleport about the place randomly!
the Heavy Fists Guy tanks for him! 6,000 damage to the Heavy Fists Guy!
Balthios intervenes with elemental control to stop the Lightning, Ice and Lava.
Two can-Terminus must be used on its own. You heal the Soul of the Core for 3,000 HP. He'll do everything else you say and just bite the Uncreativity monster.
Hoo boy. this ought to be interesting.
The Crimson Smog makes the Hatred of Formatting take 8,000 damage and skip it’s action!
The newly summoned Possessed Armors and Zineous get ready to defend the Hoop! They won’t be able to do anything except full-time guard unless they have double/triple/xtuple action, as a reminder.
The Demon Portal spits out…Two Imps! What, you were expecting something dramatic immediately? That’s not until you take too much time to kill it. One is a shifty fellow who can only be targeted with AoE-the other is on-fire and appears to be much more direct.
The world’s Most Beautiful Thing keeps fawning over itself like a big ol’ Narcissist. A very beautiful Narcissist. The Wizard of Yendor Wands Balthios for 15,000 damage! The CSI Cyber investigations are getting nowhere fast. The Solar Monolith gives a Shield to both Possessed Armors and Zineous! Humanibli idles for now (he still got summoned), not wanting to provoke a fight. The Soul of the Core uses Wildfire Waltz, and breathes a mighty gush of lava out of it! Don’t even ask how this works, because I simply do not know! In any case, Valeera, Stone and Neo Ultima are swept up into the resulting magma storm, and safe to say they do not re-emerge unscathed…Stone takes 10,000 damage because she’s basically a stone golem, the other two take 25,000 damage and are Severely Burned, which means they take Damage over time and have a half-chance of not being able to act at all! They also take a stack of Gravcrush-remember, 5 stacks and they’re dead!
Doge respawns, but isn’t able to do anything. Crocodibli deals 4,500 damage to Mibibli, as usual! The Captain roars, pounds his chest, and proceeds to bodyslam the Hatred of Formatting for 30,000 damage!
The Blue Horrors spit out a load of projectiles, but they’re hitting a lot less than the Pink Horrors did…Well, relatively, anyways. 65,000 damage to Balthios, obliterating him utterly! Barkley roars at the loss of his last teammate; the Hoop is repairing, so his next targets are clear. Valeera fights through the burning after gaining her 3rd Mana to draw, unload a Fan of Knives to 3,000 damage to all PZ entities except Walker, and drawing a card! However, she takes 5,000 damage from the Severe Burn! The Uncreativity Monster Uncreatively starts Uncreating the Heavy Fists Guy to lower his HP by 5,000! His Overcharge HP goes down by 5,000 as well…Which Neo Ultima would have shaved further for some reason, but his Severe Burning gets in the way, and deals him 5,000 damage! Storm, having neither Hoopz nor Balthios to target, opts to join his ‘relative’ and attacks Barklye for Storm-Threnody, dealing 20,000 damage to Barkley! Her Sister, Stone, generates a Clay Man and joins in with The Fire Sermon for 18,000 damage!
The Factory produces one Maxis E344, ready to go! Arina Azuma, very heavily nerfed (sadly), is still able to fight and lasers the Heavy Fists Guy for 2,000 damage! Uncle Grandpa takes the Pretzel Elemental and the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken for a ride through nonexistence land, making them both take 13,000 damage! He makes sure the Scribe notices the odd Car Keys on the Ornate Sword as well…You ought to press those at your earliest convenience.
The King Bob-Omb readies The Final Countdown gearing up for a super-powerful attack! Gearing up being the key words; He turns red, grows in size considerably (the Heavy fists Guy can’t guard him anymore), and his fuse starts burning! If that runs out, well…You don’t need me to say what’ll happen, right? Destroy him, quickly! He’ll detonate in 2 turns!
The Heavy Fists Guy takes 2,000 damage from Poison, and decides to guard the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken. Mibibli fires more Psychic missiles at Crocidibli for 4,500 damage (because he’s minicritting)! The Abnormally Larged Voidtouched chicken practices his newfound ability to see clearly in front of him to give a precise peck to storm for 15,000 damage! The Pretzel Elemental blasts a beam of pure salt to fuel a salt truck that runs over The Captain for 1 damage!
Barkley, only having one action and not having his usual double-action, decides to make the most of this situation and dribbles right through the Blue Horrors, smashing them with the pure force of the dribble at every opportunity! The Blue Horrors find that 5 of their number have met their end.
Richard +2s Doctor Shiny and Talist, and throws Barkley a basketball! Barkley’s already carrying two, so he prepares to dribble it with his head. This turns out to not be a wise idea as it was actually a pressure-activated bomb that blew up right in his face for 30,000 damage!
UserZero +2s all PZ players, and swiftly creates a replica of Peach’s Castle and gets back into her Peach cosplay from before, and then changes whatever feature she can to become an exact replica of her! Why? Uh, well it might just be to mislead you, as that castle suddenly gains about 5 million guns and fires them at the Blue Horrors, destroying 10, as well as Azuma, killing her immediately, and Storm, for 90,000 damage! She somehow shoves that in her inventory afterwards.
Terrain: Pavement (really flat, but has no standard effect)
Weather: Crimson Smog (Fear effect and 8,000 damage to random entity per turn): [|||||]
[???] Basketball Hoop: Invulnerable, kind of. Does damage to all Non-PZ entities when things are thrown into it. Guarded by: 3/3 (Zineous, 2 Possessed Armors) Repairs: [||]
[N] World's Most Beautiful Thing: 1/1 HP. Cannot be attacked. Whoever AoE kills it gets mobbed for a turn by everything until the perputratior is dead. Barkley's dunks are exceptions.
[N] Wizard of Yendor: 122,000/122,000 HP. Summon Nasties: [|||] Aggrivate Monsters: [|||] Double-Trouble: [|||||] Action: Attack one of Barkley's lackies, or Barkley himself if they're gone.
[N] SWAT Team: 10,000/10,000 HP x3 (+1) Defends the CSI Cyber Investigation Team and Cyber Portal.
[N] CSI Cyber Portal: 20,000 HP. summons a SWAT team each turn.
[N] CSI Cyber Investigation Team. Can possibly find evidence. Arrest Warrent: [||||||||||]
[N] Humanibli: 50,000/50,000 HPx3. Gains damaged as he's killed. Entities must not be invincible to damage him!
[N] Solar Monolith: 75,000/75,000 HP. Projects up to 3 Shields on entities. Action: Give a Shield to every Entity defending the Hoop!
[N-BOSS] Soul of the Core: Heads: 38,900/100,000 HP x2; 41,900/100,000 HP x1; Body: 1,500,000/1,455,800 HP. Body has high defense. Body occasionally sucks in attacks not aimed at it. Triple-Action while all heads are alive; double action if two are alive. Inflicts Gravcrush on all entities it attacks/is attacked by. Wildfire Waltz: [|||] Gravity Falls: [||||] Terminus: [|||||] Takes reduced damage from Player actions while atomicAmiable is active; Takes reduced damage from Entity actions while antimatterAugry is active. Actions: Use Wildfire Waltz on Stone, Neo Ultima and Valeera, use Gravity Falls on Storm, and bite Terminus.
[GS] Doge: 0/5,000 HP (does not attack unless an entity on its team is attacked first, will bodyguard for allies, respawns 1 round after death if there are still allied entities present). Will Guard the Hoop if any Defenders die.
[GS] The Captain: 14/20 HP.
[GS] Crocidibli: 85,500/95,000. Targets Mibibli nigh-exclusively until death. Won't die unless Death Conditions are met. Levitator Enforcer: [||||]
[AZ] Blue Horrors: 5,000/5,000 x23. Attack individually, but have REALLY low accuracy. Each Pink Horror (or two Blue Horrors) add a charge to Bolt of Change. Bolt of Change: [||||||||||][||||||||||][||||||||||][||||||||||] (This is one charge, just split into units of 10 for easy measure.)
[AZ] Valeera: 155,000/200,000 HP. Mana: 3/10. Gains +1 Mana at the START of each turn. HAND: (3) Shattered Sun Cleric, (5) Assassin's Dagger, (1) Deadly Poison, (5) Assassination, (3) Ironfur Grizzly. Sleuthhack: [||||] Severe Burn: [|||] Gravcrush: [|||||]
[AZ] Uncreativity Monster: 75,000/67,500 HP. Decays by 10K HP until at max HP value. Gains HP with Uncreative attacks aimed at it.
[AZ] Neo Ultima: 45,000/75,000 HP. Severely Burned: [|||] Gravcrush: [|||||]
[AZ] Storm: 110,000/215,000 HP. May change weather to Thunderstorm. Unaffected by Weather. Breath of the Void: [|||]
[AZ] Stone: 205,000/215,000 HP. Clay Men: 20,000/20,000 HP x1. Summons a Clay Man every turn to defend it. Taste of the Garden: [|||]
[AZ] Factory (owned by Hezetor): 55,000/55,000 HP. Maxis E344 Production: [||]
[AZ] Maxis E344: 50,000/50,000 HP. Shields: 20,000/20,000 HP, +5,000 per turn.
[AZ] Uncle Grandpa: 9/10 HP. High defense.
[AZ] Zineous: 210,000/210,000 HP. Action: Defend the Hoop! )
[AZ] Possessed Armors: 50,000/50,000 HP x2. Action: Defend the Hoop! ))
[PZ] King Bob-Omb: 147,000/150,000 HP. Detonation: [||]
[PZ] Heavy Fists Guy who Just Ate Chocolate: 59,500/125,000 HP. Can only attack in retaliation! Guarding the Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken. Poisoned: [||]
[PZ] Mibibli: 3,000/20,000 (x4). Targets Crocidibli nigh-exclusively until death. Won't die unless Death Conditions are met. The Mibible: [||||||||]
[PZ] Hatred of Formatting: 114,000/125,000 HP. More likely to dodge if an attack has formatting.
[PZ] Abnormally Large Voidtouched Chicken: 172,000/200,000 HP. Has Sure Aim!
[PZ] Pretzel Elemental: 34,000/50,000 HP. Everyone except Richard is hesitant to damage it.
[PZ] Walker: 14/20 HP. Respawns 1 Round after death.
[-GATEKEEPER-][PZ-BOSS] Charles Barkley: 220,500/400,000 HP. While alive, all PZs minicrit! Double-Action. If he successfully scores a goal on the Basketball Hoop, deals his damage to all non-PZ entities! Verboten Jam: [||] Chaos Dunk: [||||||||||]
[AZ-γ] Godmodder477: 40/50 HP.
[GM] UserZero: 138/150 HP. Behind the Barrier-invulnerable.
Distance to Yggdrasil: 4500. Locked until the Gatekeeper is slain!
The Armory (in the spoilers)
[||||] The Power Cleaner: INACTIVE. Owner: Bomber57 [AZ]
I Prep my Magic orbs. 15/20
I start making the Lava moblie 15/30
I'll just move this thread to the front page so it doesn't become forgotten.
GODDAMN IT
STUPID GENDERFLIP VIRUS
Alright Tazz. I will write a more organized response tomorrow (writing a response at midnight tends to just make things worse).
PS: I suggest a post limit of 50 to avoid issues with update overload, I had to do it once when I left for 2 days on my forum game and 5 pages piled up.
/null
/null
A post limit does sound like a good idea.
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
/null, this was only here for the purpose of copying
No matter who wins, this can't end well...people like you should be burning in...you know, that place.
As usual, the only way to end a war for good is to discover its beginning...and end that beginning.
So, Uzi. Sorry to let you know, but this is as far as you go.
"lol ur stooped im God."
"Actually, as the omnipotent creator of this universe, I think I fit the bill more than some bearded guy who can't escape from some rope."
17/20 Charging magic orbs
17/30 making the lavamoble
7/50 7/50
Flail || Sharp Knife = Flailbldae 3/3 COMPLETE
Katana && Shamir = Absurdly Sharp Blade 2/2 COMPLETE
Flailbldae && Absurdly Sharp Blade = Absurdly Sharp Flailbldae 1/?
sorry for forgetting to wait for EOTB to post. ill just repost this later.
Potato kick-stater salad(a potato made of salad kick-starter.)14/25(or 18 if the helping effect works)
The damaged blasting pages && Damaged Transmutation field alternator 5/6 Damaged Warp Zone
my items
The Reinforcement level 1
Damaged The blasting pages level -1
Damaged Transmutation field alternator level -1
Book of support level 2
Then I explain that a HLM is a kind of building which have no military interest at all(looks like cubic buildings made for putting humans into rooms) but that it was only to see if the reinforcement had this kind of powers.
/nulledactionpost
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
OK, massive disappointment, but I can't make the EoTBdop today. It was just busy and I got distracted-I'll admit. No-one is more dissapointed than I am in that regard. I CAN find the time to do this-I'm not making it up-BUT when I'm trying to do it is the real problem, I think, so that'll be changed up. expect earlier updates, like around 4-5 EST instead of 8-9 EST. Scheduling is the problem on my end, I think, and if I can fix that properly...Well, updates will flow again!
In any case, I AM still nulling pre-EoTB posts, you know? It's not a COMPLETE update until the EoTB is there! (If any attacks wind up nulled, feel free to repeat them in a non-null post, because I'm not a jerk like that.)
+1 to ALL charges as immediate compensation. If the update doesn't come tomorrow you may kick my rear end for it.
A button shows up on my HUD.
>Reset? Y/N
>Y
>Very well.
I'm back, baby!
I drive the Electric Greatsword into the Gatekeeper.
//Charges//
The Orbital Facepalm Cannon: 2/50 (+1 Tazz)
//Alchemies//
Machina || Beggar's Bazooka = Face Exploder^3 (1/?)
Electric Greatsword && Origin Blaze Rod = Flare (1/?)
//Inventory//
Electric Greatsword (non-alchemy)
Woohoo! +1 to both charges! At least you're offering something in return for your lack of updates!
/null
An alternate timeline emerges.
However, we must first start from the beginning...
I hope SHE doesn't show up...
Portal to the mary sue realm: 2/30
THE UPDATE IS FINALLY DONE!
I apologize for how long that took-it just SHOULDN'T have, but it did. Again, +1 to all of your charges as compensation. I'm reasonably confident in my ability to keep updates on-track from here-on, that was just a major slip up on my part (and IRL life getting in the way). So, here's to hoping DTG0 updates come on smoothly from here!
"Edgy teenagers? Just make sure they don't brutally kill us/me. Please. i HATE Edge."
i summon the Titanic to fall on Charles Barkley. it is filled with explosives that explode when it hits the ground.
Factory of stuff 11/25 (2+ from tazz)
A monkey's paw 8/20 (2+ from tazz)
2+ to cyangynist
Posts may contain high amounts of stupid.
. And you know what the best part of all this is? You'll DO it. And then you'll lose to me again. And again. And again!!! Because you want a "happy ending." Because you "love your friends." Because you "never give up." Isn't that delicious? Your "determination." The power that let you get this far... It's gonna be your downfall!
Attack that got left to the wayside last turn, unfocused. (Next attack is the focused one)
43/50 Dark Bowser (+1 from Dark, +1 from Tazz)
4/50 Charging something! Get ready to pray! (Yes, I know what I’m charging. Guess!) (+1 from Tazz_)
+2 Pit
Lens of Truth && Spoon Bender (Binding of Isaac) 3/?? (Still need a comment on the charge length and output)
"What was that you said, Uzi? when you have a 100% winrate, that's NOT n00bishness, that's not suicidal overconfidnece, that's FACT.
Well, one of us is going to end our streak. Though I've had help when my enemies also had it, I've never lost a straight up duel with no powers (I include the Veil in powers). I've dealt with those who've received Diaboli Ex Machina to help them beat me. They still lose. In short, this isn't going to be easy for either of us, so I'd appreciate you start taking us seriously.
Oh well. Situation Normal: Gorilla'd up beyond all recognition."
Also, Richard may be a bit of an idiot, way too scared of a certain musical instrument, and may be a massive troll, but at least he can spell correctly! I'm almost certain Tazz doesn't have the red lines under the words that are misspelled.
Attack 4: The Video Game Diner
I order everything on this menu for Charles Barkley to eat. Unfortunately, this version of the Video Game Diner runs on real world logic, and gives him massive food poisoning, instead of its normal in game effect.
I take a number of players to the Video Game Diner where everything tastes delicious, as well. I'm a good caterer, what can I say! (Note: These are players, not entities, this isn't going to heal. I'm just being nice)
Appetizers:
Toad in the ____ (Banjo-Tooie)
Grilled Fuzzy (Touch Fuzzy, get Dizzy!/Yoshi’s Island)
Salad of Evil with Rage Dressing (Partners in Time)
Bad Movie Tie-in Soup (So many things, but E.T. was the first)
Clams dipped in Grunt Blood (HALO)
Rushed Game Chili Dogs (SEGA WHEN WILL YOU LEARN/Sonic)
Beans of Stat Increase (Mario and Luigi Series)
Maxim Tomatos and Whispy Apples (Kirby)
Entrees:
Subpar 15-Years Delayed Lasagna (Duke Nukem Forever)
Shroom Steak (Paper Mario)
Turkey Leg embedded in Dracula’s Castle Wall (Castlevania)
Sandvich, with optional Mustard of your Doom (TF2+Superstar Saga)
Fried Goldeen (Really?)
Military Rations, with physics defying battery-restoring mushrooms (MGS)
Laser-Baked Chicken (Duck Game)
Millenia-old Fruit for literal days (Pikmin)
Portal to the Meat Dimension (Persona 4)
Yeto’s Soup, Eat it all for a free meal! (Twilight Princess)
Dessert:
The Cake, made to Blue Personality Core recipe (Again, REALLY?)
Lava Cookie (Pokemon, again)
Moogle Pie (Final Fantasy)
Couple’s Cake, made from cooking two bunnies together (Super Paper Mario)
Roast Whacka Bump (Paper Mario, again)
Chunko-Honey Candy Bar (Deus Ex)
Invincibility Lollipops (Guaranteed to cause a sugar rush/Kirby)
"Free" Candy (Candy Crush)
Golden Banana Split (Donkey Kong)
Floor Ice Cream (Kid Icarus)
Doc Louis' Chocolate Bar (Nintendo and the Video Game Diner are not responsible for any damage caused by Doc Louis taking revenge for his Chocolate Bar/Punchout!!)
Drinks:
Grandma’s Homemade Elixer (Wind Waker)
Fus Ro Mead (And, say it with me, REALLY???!?!?!?!?)
Health Potion (So many things)
“Love” Potion (Sims)
Bucket o’ Milk (Minecraft)
I don't know what it is, but the alcohol level is waaaaaay too high for beer (GTA V)
No matter who wins, this can't end well...people like you should be burning in...you know, that place.
As usual, the only way to end a war for good is to discover its beginning...and end that beginning.
So, Uzi. Sorry to let you know, but this is as far as you go.
"lol ur stooped im God."
"Actually, as the omnipotent creator of this universe, I think I fit the bill more than some bearded guy who can't escape from some rope."
7/50 Operation "Artifact is Go"
8/10 Assault Team Omega
Inventory:
Data Crystal (Level 1)
Chaos Control "Sword" (Level 5)
Holocrom Datea Storige (Level 0)
Shockjewel Armor (Level 3)