I accidentally print dozens of scandalous newspapers, and then make Chargeman read them. His scandal promptly goes though the room from being seen reading such scandalous and low-quality material. His Scandal meter easily reachs 999999999999999999999, moments before he is exiled. He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile.
He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile.


This ends with him being exiled into a vat of dogs, who proceed to absorb him, steal his charges, and limber onto the battlefield. Did we mention one of the exiles was hell, and he sold his soul? Oh well. A tragic day to be a chargeman, to be sure. Meanwhile, the payment for his soul is promptly dropped on him- 1000 Nevercold Brass Ingots, directly to the brain. This, of course, is moments before i soak him in Oil, lacre, various cleaning products, and so on and so forth. None of this harms the dogs, who are directly relaying all of his to him.

I then proceed to add in a drop of a special chemical solution. Charge Man promptly doubles over in agony as the mix of products bleach him from existence, moments before i regain his soul and then destroy his soul. Right before his horribly-dying eyes, too.


14/20
4/20
2+ to trickle

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 19:29:00

Hi. Remember me?
I am in my mobile home, when suddenly, I spy some lunatic that claims to be the Godmodder. I decide to fight lunacy with lunacy, and get some Anime Hair Gel and some purple hair dye. My character is female. Her name is Betty de Famme. You know what happens next.

A strange figure barrels out of the mobile home. She claims to be a vampire, and has purple hair and a bat wing hairstyle. She's also carrying a parasol.
"KEE HEE HEE! Bring it on!"
She bats the simumodder in ze face with her parasol. Bats come out of it. The bats bite the simumodder.
Let me try and do a charge.
Vote Paul Atishon 2k17: 1/3

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 19:58:00

I give the living virus some extra code
"IF: entity.Meat_Shield is alive, THEN: attack entity.Meat_Shields"
In laymans terms, attack the meat shields and continue attacking as long as they remain alive. Other than that, I start charging stuff
Kamayamaya (beam attack): 1/15
Solar Flare (reduces accuracy of all hostile enemies who can see it): 1/5

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 21:08:00

Order of the silver wossname 9/11

Zombies you say? Perhaps they could be improved...

Zomboss training facility (produces stronger, more specialized zombies) 1/20

I challenge Charge Man to Knife and Candle, also known as Gentleman's Murder Tag.
However since he doesn't have a knife i just stab him. And then cut off his candlewick.
However he doesn't have a candle either so I just stab him again. As I am the victor I take some of his prize tokens and any stealable loot.

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 22:57:00

Alicia does a generic heal. It is generic, it is a heal and then the little girl with the fillertech teddy comes running along.

Suddenly, the fillertech teddy starts spouting letters, letters representing reality. It then gives a kabbalistic lecture about healing.

"Alicia Mary Cambridge is 18. 18 is considered a lucky number by Jewish people, as in Jewish Gematria, the Hebrew word for life corresponds to the number 18. Thus, Alicia is bless with life. Look at all that energy flowing into her. It's much more healthy than her jealously hanging over her. Healing, when transliterated into Hebrew, shares a Jewish Gematria value with Alpha, which this incarnation of Alicia wants to desperately become. Thus, she desperately wants tk be healed, and thus I will oblige."

Alicia is healed.

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 23:00:00

o---Charges---
Care Package: 9 / 20 (+4, Simumodder)
Fine: 1 / 20
+2 to JOE

Marron watches as Alicia uses two rather mean things against Ette.

tc: Ette.
tc: Excuse me while I kill this lady.

Marron begins her assault on Alicia (or Consumer, the battlefield entity. They're the same thing, right?) by letting loose a barrage of crossbow bolts at her! While the bolts were easily avoided, the spinning kick that follows up soon after isn't as easy to avoid, and knocks Alicia back a short distance. She then pulls a scythe out of... somewhere.

tc: I wish I knew how to use something more convenient then a scythe...
tc: Buuuuuut, it's the only thing I know how to use with a bit of competence. So there.

The puppeteer performs a massive circular slash, which Alicia easily ducks under... leaving her open to another kick, landing with a thud. While she's dazed from that, instead of performing any sort of reasonable murder-y maneuver with the scythe, Marron kicks her again, knocking her on her back. A downwards swing from the blade is easily avoided, leaving it stuck in the ground. While she struggles to rip the blade out of the earth, Alicia eats some salt, allowing her to use Saltmodder! [small][small]That's what she'd apparently do, according to Consumer.[/small][/small] Something vague and terrible happens to Marron, launching her a moderate distance away. There's a bit of blood flowing out the side of her mouth and her clothes are somewhat torn, but she's apparently not done yet!

With a burst of adrenaline, she rushes forward, rips the scythe out of the ground effortlessly, and in one fluid motion, slashes at Alicia, leaving a rather ugly mark on her. She manages to connect with two more follow-up slashes, before her foe manages to quickly dart backward, and simply pistol(?)-whips Marron with the Golden Sun. The sudden jolt of pain makes Marron drop her scythe to the ground... leading up to her unleashing a right hook towards Alicia's head. It doesn't do much, but it leaves her open for Marron's new COMBAT SPECIAL: PUPPETEERS' STRINGS! This does something vague and horrible to Alicia. Marron, apparently satisfied with her assault, casually walks over to Ette.

tc: Hey, sis.
tc: Fighting with her wasn't easy, to say the least. Mind fixing up my face?

Ette, after scolding her sister through a rather large and complex series of handwaves, gives her a hug, and then stitches up her wounds... somehow. It certainly wasn't a pleasant process. With a pat on the head, Ette decides to use her actual action this turn to fix up Charge Man more with Stitch Together... or if he's dead, Steffan.

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 23:15:00

Swordstorm 10/10 charge Complete.

Le Dudes 1/20

+1 Consomme

A gun appears in front of sparkysfaint. He raises it and fires at the Balrog. However, instead of shooting something, two large pincers come out.

Wait wot wot

The pincers suddenly bend out and start spinning rapidly, creating the illusion of a circle. A portal appears within, and out shoots a giant red flaming sword, which impales the Balrog.

Ooh, hey, Firebra-

The blade dissapears.

;-;

Originally posted on 2017-01-16 23:17:00

14/20 Astral unlocking
New charge: Cake 9/10 +2 from ire +4 from simmumodder
+2 to tricklejest the deal continues
steffan RP: 2 (by the time he acts anyway)
he uses heal sentry again, making another one.

both heal sentrys heal ette, or if she is full HP, steffen- if steffen is also full hp (probable) then they heal charge man.

"by the way marron, I didn't +1 you that turn because i knew you wouldn’t need it."
"Oh, and I almost forgot: you should try pickaxe fighting. its like scythes but double-ended and also boomerang-able"
"as in you can throw them like a boomerang."
"its wonderful"
on to my action.
consumers dieing soon, but I have better things to do right now.
namely, killing those seekers of the nom.
its time they die.
twin flames appear in each my hands, and float outwards, circling me.
the ground beneath me begins to crack from heat.
more small flames float around me, and I am slowly engulfed in flame.
the nearest seeker takes a kick to the head, and dies. fireballs fill the sky, and rain down, one after another, and I appear above, watching the carnage, and the twin flames coalesce in my right hand, forming into a blue sword.
Blink.
I land in the middle of the pack, cracking the ground.
Blink.
A trail of burning corpses leads out of the hoard, and I stand there with my back turned and sword sheathed.
They advance, and I leap backwards and over their heads, a burning double standing where I was and taking the blow.
5 black outlines of my body flash forward, and split the hoard with lines of black fire.
Blink.
I slash one of their heads off.
Blink.
I strike the other side of the herd and slice 10 heads off with a single blow.
Blink.Blink.Blink.Blink. Booooom Blink.
The herd is split in 10, smouldering craters scattered around.
My body glows brighter, energy unstable from the rapid Blinking, and I look at the hoard, egging them on with a yawn.
They run forward, thinking about how tasty I might be.
Blink.
Another blink, another line of corpses.
I Blink back to them, leaving another row of corpses, and start slicing them apart, keeping them away from all sides with one hand.

Time to end this.
I Blink to the centre of the hoard, and the flaming aura around me explodes, decimating a large crater around me.
And then a giant doughnut falls from the sky.
They love food, so they begin to eat, chomping large quantity’s off.
Then a bunch more stuff, like a steak and chicken leg and some 100% authentic ravenous wolf meat. They eat all this, ingesting all the food.
Then a set of small orbs fall all around the herd, and play the following message
"Thank you from buying from Dogberts legitimate giant shard filled explosive foods. The food will explode in 3 minutes. Remember our tag-line: our product will kill you, but its OK because it tastes great!"
They all panic, running into one another and mingling into the crowd, and then explode. Into giant shard filled meat lumps.
the remaining seekers can't resist, and start eating the shard filled meat lumps. this kills most of them, since there’s so many lumps, and they only have 1HP.
[Response to Speed/auth/whatever name i should use: no, I'm don't think this will kill all of them. a decent amount, sure, but not all.]

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 00:16:00

i use the power of NANOMACHINES, SON to heal Consumer. They are now infused with NANOMACHINE, SON. THEY HARDEN IN RESPONSE TO PSYCHICAL TRAUMA. I then proceed to make a healing potion out of consomme, using only 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000% illegal medical herbs, which i give to Alicia.


I then claim copyright on Dogberts, forcing joe to change the name. No, this isn't intended as a full-on counter.

15/20
9/20 4+ from trickle
2+ to trickle

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 00:22:00

I'm an anti Godmodder.
/null

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 01:26:00

OOC: ups.

Auth gently sighs at Alicia. Seriously, Alicia, I think that might be a little bit of an overreaction? Marron hasn't bullied me into anything.

Auth then turns to the recently summoned Ette, greeting her in her own sign language. While, Marron, I understand yours. Now, to deal with this pain in my neck.

Auth grabs Joe's attention.

Just so you know, I also disapprove of this lot, but honestly, if you think that's going to kill all 32500 of them, you'd be wrong. There's too many. And now...

Auth throws his hand up into the air, and blood surrounds it.

Haemokinesis. A useful power for Vampires, Dhampyrs...

Several thousand more Seekers join the Hunt.

and summoning more ravenous lunatics. Trust me, I wish they were gone as well, but they are a valuable combat asset while they are here, and I will not let you destroy the value of those assets.

Auth sheaths the blade that he has, he doesn't think he'll need it for a good long while. Marron and Ette should recognize it, and the cognitohazard the sheath has.

Don't look at it. Seriously.

Meanwhile, Auth decides to do something useful now, besides drinking tea.

He commands the Underknight. It points its blade into the air, focusing the light around it into the blade. Because Light of Faith can't heal the Underknight (should have said that huh), it heals Alicia and The Living Virus. More Seekers corral around the Beam of Light, summoning even more seekers. This can't end well.

Due to the influx of Seekers, they decide it's an opportune time for NORTH. The eldest 4000 of them walk away, and then keep walking. Then get on a boat. Then go to a massive statue of ice and Gant, far far away from the battlefield. A very long way North. And it's cold. They're never seen again.

This somehow causes the Seekers to become temporarily more damaging. They all charge at Steffan, and rip and tear into him. He becomes covered in bit marks and scars as the Seekers attempt to eat his still-moving body. They do not appear to care about how they seem. They're like zombies. Alive... scarred... marked zombies. It's petrifying how vicious they are in their cannibalism.

Auth sighs and winces, before turning to Betty.

Madam, shouldn't you be in jail? As an accomplice to the murder of Mr. Mistree? Should your sister, Ms. Bonny de Famme, be around somewhere? Or is she in jail as well? Also, do not lie to me, Ms. de Famme. You are a stage magician, not a vampire.

Auth appears to know quite a bit about the exploits of the Wright and Co. Law Offices, or the Wright Anything Agency, as Betty would know it.

I must say that your prank on Ms. Wright was very mean-spirited, and even had Mr. Mistree not ended up dead, it wouldn't have been funny to anyone but yourself and Mr. Retinz.

Auth smirks, revealing elongated canine teeth.

It is folly to think that you could trick an actual vampire into believing that you are a vampire, especially if said vampire happens to know that you are not.

Auth then sighs, and returns to where he was, waiting for someone to make a folly move.

ACTION SUMMARY:

Auth greets Ette, then uses Haemokinesis to summon more Seekers.

The Underknight uses Light of Faith, summoning more seekers and healing Alicia and the Living Virus.

The Seekers use NORTH, then attack Steffan.

SPECIAL ATTACKS:

THE ARMOUR OF ROYALS: 7/20

THE MASTERS OF LONDON: 8/20

+1 to Hez, Ire.

(@Con Air I'd have made it "Vote Paul Atishon 2k28", but that's just me.)

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 04:52:00

<OOC> I use all of Joe's +2s he gave me, sorry about that, Pobyo.
I also convert ETERNITY into JoeChargeContractDealio, I guess.
I then revert the 20 charge into a ten charge, use 5 of Joe's 10 +1s to fuel it completely and it will remain there, if that's possible.
The other 5 +1s will go to Rise of the Charges. </OOC>

"TINCUBE LIVESSSSS!!!!!!"
"...sorta?"

Trickle, full of joy, pounces around the battlefield, before he notices a big... thing?... at the top of the battlefield.
Ohhhh shit.
The PS have the advantage.

"Ohhhh shit indeed."
"Time to do something about it."

Trickle's pent-up-rage-meter skyrockets, as he hasn't eviscerated anything that big for a while.

"It's time."

He takes some hot sauce out of his backpack, drinks it, and becomes one of his many forms, this one being FIESTA TRICKLE, also known as Fickle.

[TRICKLEJEST INC. WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE SHITTY MEXICAN IMPRESSION]

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Trickle walks up to Ette and starts choking them.

"No hard feelings but-"
"ANDALE!!!"

He then performs a German Suplex on Ette, smashing the poor doll onto the ground.
The Asterism is drawn, and Fickle slices Ette into pieces, plush flying in the sky. Ette's smile turns into a horrid defaced smirk, while Fickle tears the puppet apart in pure rage.

"DIE, YOU CREEPY CABRON!!! JODETE!!!"

The Asterism freezes poor Ette in place, not that the doll could've hit Fickle. With his incredible vim via the hot sauce, his rage, his happiness via TinCube's semi-return and his egoism, Fickle manages to disassemble Ette and assemble it back into a wheel. He sends the wheel down a nearby Convenient Hill, onto a pair of deadly spikes.
Fickle removes Ette from the spikes and uses a shredder to shred them into small chunks, which he burns, takes the ash and sprinkles it into some lava, making sure Ette won't survive. Oh, and the lava also rises up to become a Lava Monster, which smashes Ette side to side. Poor Ette. Poor, little, sweet Ette.

The Monster also tosses Ette into DTG1, straight into the Godmodder, where the TT2000 is surprised by this shocking twist of events and makes Richard completely destroy Ette. Everyone is converted into [PG] and face Ette in combat. The puppet is dead in no time. They then reassemble Ette into a spoil which eventually becomes the Godmodder Arm, because I said so.

Sorry Ire, I just really fucking hate puppets.
I really, really, really fucking hate puppets.
Oh, and Fickle also uses the MP35 to play Mexican songs while he kills Ette.
Because face it.
Mexican songs are pretty freaking cool.

---

CHARGES
-----------
Rise of the Charges - 17/20.
??? - 10/10. IN PLACE.
-----------

+2 to Battlefury.
QUE IS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 09:14:00

15/20 Astral unlocking
Cake! 10/15 Edited after conversing with piono.
+2 tricklejest continue the deal (5/8?)
firstly,

this shields steffan from attacks on him this turn to an extent. if you would like to refer to it as some sort of counter, its closest to stopping seekers of the name. the shield also has some magical, minor effect on ette that’s really small but its there and protects her a bit. since last time the animation wasn’t enough to be a smash, I assume this time it won't either, and if it is somehow, have any excess power harm the seakers.
of course, after this I repeat my anti-tamper with the reverse-cronal barriers. and point out that i do not run the company that sells shard filled food, so the copyright has done nothing to me. [small][small]sorryiftheanimationsmakeaproblemijustdon'thavemuchtodointhemorningssoidothis
[/small][/small]
"hey betty. hey. yeah you. what are you doing outside of the fire dung- oh wait nevermind your not that one oops."
"I shall now break the fourth wall"
"'ey con why do you use her so much? at least use the better variant I made you. that one isn’t a criminal, and also is way mo- SHINY~~!"
"back to my point you should totally use the better one that i can control."
"oh, and "auth", the main reason I attacked the seekers is the limit break sounds cool, though them being a threat is part of it"

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 11:05:00

Primary weapon: X-Corpse Shooter
Secondary weapon: Corpse Piercer
Tertiary weapon: Corpse Blaster
Armor: NA

FVS facepalms at the stupidity of the horde of zombies that just arrived.

"You imbeciles. Just attack Charge Man! He's already badly injured!"

She would say something else, but the high levels of continuous heat finally causes her body to react by making her arms explode into tentacles.

Temporary Mutation: 5/5 (USED)

Another moment later, she proceeds to sprint around the battlefield, stopping once she crashes into the Balrog and proceeding to clobber it with her new tentacle arms, bashing it again and again and again until eventually she ends up bashing her own arms off from the sheer amount of blunt force. That... does take a while though, due to the fact that her arms caught on fire, and pretty much anyone infected with the same virus as her will gain heavily increased regeneration from being set on fire. Nope, dunno how it works either.

"Ow my goddamn arms."

...Time to begin a new charge!

Let's Basically Just Set A Zombie On Fire And See What Happens: 2/8 (+1 from urus)
+1 to Urus

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 12:44:00

Betty: Don't make me laugh! I was never arrested, only Reus was! And now, for my next magic trick!
Betty slams her parasol into the ground. This irratates a mole man who digs up out of the ground. He found a grenade in there, and he throws it at charge man.

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 14:36:00

Fickle uses fire against fire to destroy the Fire Demons.
It works.
Just... don't question it, okay?

---

CHARGES
-----------
Rise of the Charges - 18/20.
??? - 10/10. IN PLACE.
-----------

+2 to Battlefury.
QUE IS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 17:40:00

Silver wossname: 10/11
Zomboss training facility: 2/20

Cognitohazard you say? How wonderful! Say, that reminds me of me...

I pull out me and put myself near Steffan, along with a portable electric generator and inexplicably large supply of bread.
My effects should commence shortly.


Originally posted on 2017-01-17 19:54:00

"When in my continuous presence for over two months, individuals begin to identify themselves as a toaster. Unless forcibly restrained, these people will ultimately harm themselves in their attempts to emulate my standard functions."
"continuous presence for over two months"
"over two months"
"My effects should commence shortly."
"two months"
"shortly."
you logicaly need some timewarp effect for that to work.
(oh, and steffans currently surrounded by purple magic energy barrier.)
anyway, that clearly isn’t the right object, because i have just spoken about it in 3ed person. SPC's like that never work.
/NULL

Originally posted on 2017-01-17 21:17:00

Two announcements: First off! Keep cursing to the minimum. F-bombs apparently set off the web filter I'm using. Anyone who breaks that rule will have the offending post nulled by virtue of me not being able to quote it. Trickle gets a pass this round because none of us had any idea something like this would happen.

Second of all, rebalanced limit breaks to be a bit weaker.

QUOTE (ConsumerOfAll @ (time=1484594613))

"Hey! You! Ruby ripoff who knows Auth! Stop bullying my teammates into giving charges to you, hm?" "woah terrible and old ally just remembered to be offended now ette is going to horribly die " "Shush, no spoilers! As I was saying, how about I hurt your dearest sister?" Alicia says, salt pouring next to her. As you may have noticed, Ette is not going to get the luxury of living. Alicia picks up the Golden Sun, before activating Saltmodder - Basic, and firing. She seems to be half-[REDACTED FOR POBYO SENSIBILITIES]ing this? She then reloads the Golden Sun via Reloading for You. Suddenly a caricature of Pobyo walks in. "wait youe action has to be decent to reload to full" This caricature of Pobyo is cool and new, and thus Alcia immediately cannibalises it, before slowly taking out the elements of Piono's OPness. For example, we have Elecom Elemental Control Blood, blood infused and given to rich men in Universe 8273 desperate for power to give them minor control of elements, and actually to induct them into the Illuminati, with the Illuminati portion diluted with copious amounts of Mind Cheese, which cheeses bosses, and mixed in with Liquid OP. A little girl walks in, picking up a teddy bear. "Sowwy. I misplaced mai fillertech teddy." Alicia stares at her. The little girl starts crying, streams of tears falling down and mixing in with the Extracted OPness, before Alcia throws in a bunch of rye infested with ergot, and puts it into the Golden Sun. Alicia uses the Golden Sun and Saltmodder on Ette. Reloading for You, Reloading for N00bs [10/10] COMPLETE, used to reload the Golden Sun. Broken Coalition [1/15]

Combat Special: Saltmodder (basic)
Alicia glares. It's a good glare, the kind that says "I hate you" "You're going to die soon" and "Don't turn your back on me if you enjoy living" all in one look. Quite handy, especially for someone like Alicia, who hates people with alarming frequency and intensity. As her glare grows more intense she begins feeling a mysterious tingle... its almost like deja vu but she begins feeling the echoes of a power she had once long ago, or maybe, will have far in the future? She reaches out and grabs for it, only to miss and hit something close, but not quite the same. She looks up, her glare growing even more intense, and suddenly, powerful SALTBEAMS shoot from her eyes, a glare so intensely salty that it can turn people who aren't careful into salt. They weren't careful.
1 ammo expended, 7000 damage dealt!
5 ammo loaded in almost immediately!
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Battlefury @ (time=1484594965))

I accidentally print dozens of scandalous newspapers, and then make Chargeman read them. His scandal promptly goes though the room from being seen reading such scandalous and low-quality material. His Scandal meter easily reachs 999999999999999999999, moments before he is exiled. He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile.  He is then exiled from the exile. He is then exiled from the exile. This ends with him being exiled into a vat of dogs, who proceed to absorb him, steal his charges, and limber onto the battlefield. Did we mention one of the exiles was hell, and he sold his soul? Oh well. A tragic day to be a chargeman, to be sure. Meanwhile, the payment for his soul is promptly dropped on him- 1000 Nevercold Brass Ingots, directly to the brain. This, of course, is moments before i soak him in Oil, lacre, various cleaning products, and so on and so forth. None of this harms the dogs, who are directly relaying all of his to him. I then proceed to add in a drop of a special chemical solution. Charge Man promptly doubles over in agony as the mix of products bleach him from existence, moments before i regain his soul and then destroy his soul. Right before his horribly-dying eyes, too. 14/20 4/20 2+ to trickle

6000 damage to the horribly mangled charge man.
+8000 XP

QUOTE (Con Air @ (time=1484596690))

Hi. Remember me? I am in my mobile home, when suddenly, I spy some lunatic that claims to be the Godmodder. I decide to fight lunacy with lunacy, and get some Anime Hair Gel and some purple hair dye. My character is female. Her name is Betty de Famme. You know what happens next. A strange figure barrels out of the mobile home. She claims to be a vampire, and has purple hair and a bat wing hairstyle. She's also carrying a parasol. "KEE HEE HEE! Bring it on!" She bats the simumodder in ze face with her parasol. Bats come out of it. The bats bite the simumodder. Let me try and do a charge. Vote Paul Atishon 2k17: 1/3

Howdy con!
The Simumodder swats at the bats, points to the entity advantage counter, and cackles as all of the bats burst into flames and burn to crisps.
+2000 XP

QUOTE (Emerald_Mann @ (time=1484600925))

I give the living virus some extra code "IF: entity.Meat_Shield is alive, THEN: attack entity.Meat_Shields" In laymans terms, attack the meat shields and continue attacking as long as they remain alive. Other than that, I start charging stuff Kamayamaya (beam attack): 1/15 Solar Flare (reduces accuracy of all hostile enemies who can see it): 1/5

Meat shields are already kaput, son.
+2000 XP

QUOTE (1412 @ (time=1484607462))

Order of the silver wossname 9/11 Zombies you say? Perhaps they could be improved... Zomboss training facility (produces stronger, more specialized zombies) 1/20 I challenge Charge Man to Knife and Candle, also known as Gentleman's Murder Tag. However since he doesn't have a knife i just stab him. And then cut off his candlewick. However he doesn't have a candle either so I just stab him again. As I am the victor I take some of his prize tokens and any stealable loot.

You steal a pocket full of batteries and 5000 hit points.
+7000 XP

QUOTE (ConsumerOfAll @ (time=1484607638))

Alicia does a generic heal. It is generic, it is a heal and then the little girl with the fillertech teddy comes running along. Suddenly, the fillertech teddy starts spouting letters, letters representing reality. It then gives a kabbalistic lecture about healing. "Alicia Mary Cambridge is 18. 18 is considered a lucky number by Jewish people, as in Jewish Gematria, the Hebrew word for life corresponds to the number 18. Thus, Alicia is bless with life. Look at all that energy flowing into her. It's much more healthy than her jealously hanging over her. Healing, when transliterated into Hebrew, shares a Jewish Gematria value with Alpha, which this incarnation of Alicia wants to desperately become. Thus, she desperately wants tk be healed, and thus I will oblige." Alicia is healed.

1 health restored
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Irecreeper @ (time=1484608538))

o---Charges--- Care Package: 9 / 20 (+4, Simumodder) Fine: 1 / 20 +2 to JOE Marron watches as Alicia uses two rather mean things against Ette. tc: Ette. tc: Excuse me while I kill this lady. Marron begins her assault on Alicia (or Consumer, the battlefield entity. They're the same thing, right?) by letting loose a barrage of crossbow bolts at her! While the bolts were easily avoided, the spinning kick that follows up soon after isn't as easy to avoid, and knocks Alicia back a short distance. She then pulls a scythe out of... somewhere. tc: I wish I knew how to use something more convenient then a scythe... tc: Buuuuuut, it's the only thing I know how to use with a bit of competence. So there. The puppeteer performs a massive circular slash, which Alicia easily ducks under... leaving her open to another kick, landing with a thud. While she's dazed from that, instead of performing any sort of reasonable murder-y maneuver with the scythe, Marron kicks her again, knocking her on her back. A downwards swing from the blade is easily avoided, leaving it stuck in the ground. While she struggles to rip the blade out of the earth, Alicia eats some salt, allowing her to use Saltmodder! [small][small]That's what she'd apparently do, according to Consumer.[/small][/small] Something vague and terrible happens to Marron, launching her a moderate distance away. There's a bit of blood flowing out the side of her mouth and her clothes are somewhat torn, but she's apparently not done yet! With a burst of adrenaline, she rushes forward, rips the scythe out of the ground effortlessly, and in one fluid motion, slashes at Alicia, leaving a rather ugly mark on her. She manages to connect with two more follow-up slashes, before her foe manages to quickly dart backward, and simply pistol(?)-whips Marron with the Golden Sun. The sudden jolt of pain makes Marron drop her scythe to the ground... leading up to her unleashing a right hook towards Alicia's head. It doesn't do much, but it leaves her open for Marron's new COMBAT SPECIAL: PUPPETEERS' STRINGS! This does something vague and horrible to Alicia. Marron, apparently satisfied with her assault, casually walks over to Ette. tc: Hey, sis. tc: Fighting with her wasn't easy, to say the least. Mind fixing up my face? Ette, after scolding her sister through a rather large and complex series of handwaves, gives her a hug, and then stitches up her wounds... somehow. It certainly wasn't a pleasant process. With a pat on the head, Ette decides to use her actual action this turn to fix up Charge Man more with Stitch Together... or if he's dead, Steffan.

2 damage to consomme!
Ette will do as you say!
+8000 XP

QUOTE (Redstonetam15 @ (time=1484608636))

Swordstorm 10/10 charge Complete. Le Dudes 1/20 +1 Consomme A gun appears in front of sparkysfaint. He raises it and fires at the Balrog. However, instead of shooting something, two large pincers come out. Wait wot wot The pincers suddenly bend out and start spinning rapidly, creating the illusion of a circle. A portal appears within, and out shoots a giant red flaming sword, which impales the Balrog. Ooh, hey, Firebra- The blade dissapears. ;-;

Ooh that was fancy. 4000 damage to the balrog!
+6000 XP

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1484612208))

14/20 Astral unlocking New charge: Cake 9/10 +2 from ire +4 from simmumodder +2 to tricklejest the deal continues steffan RP: 2 (by the time he acts anyway) he uses heal sentry again, making another one. Spoiler Alert both heal sentrys heal ette, or if she is full HP, steffen- if steffen is also full hp (probable) then they heal charge man. "by the way marron, I didn't +1 you that turn because i knew you wouldn’t need it." "Oh, and I almost forgot: you should try pickaxe fighting. its like scythes but double-ended and also boomerang-able" "as in you can throw them like a boomerang." "its wonderful" on to my action. consumers dieing soon, but I have better things to do right now. namely, killing those seekers of the nom. its time they die. twin flames appear in each my hands, and float outwards, circling me. the ground beneath me begins to crack from heat. more small flames float around me, and I am slowly engulfed in flame. the nearest seeker takes a kick to the head, and dies. fireballs fill the sky, and rain down, one after another, and I appear above, watching the carnage, and the twin flames coalesce in my right hand, forming into a blue sword. Blink. I land in the middle of the pack, cracking the ground. Blink. A trail of burning corpses leads out of the hoard, and I stand there with my back turned and sword sheathed. They advance, and I leap backwards and over their heads, a burning double standing where I was and taking the blow. 5 black outlines of my body flash forward, and split the hoard with lines of black fire. Blink. I slash one of their heads off. Blink. I strike the other side of the herd and slice 10 heads off with a single blow. Blink.Blink.Blink.Blink. Booooom Blink. The herd is split in 10, smouldering craters scattered around. My body glows brighter, energy unstable from the rapid Blinking, and I look at the hoard, egging them on with a yawn. They run forward, thinking about how tasty I might be. Blink. Another blink, another line of corpses. I Blink back to them, leaving another row of corpses, and start slicing them apart, keeping them away from all sides with one hand. Time to end this. I Blink to the centre of the hoard, and the flaming aura around me explodes, decimating a large crater around me. And then a giant doughnut falls from the sky. They love food, so they begin to eat, chomping large quantity’s off. Then a bunch more stuff, like a steak and chicken leg and some 100% authentic ravenous wolf meat. They eat all this, ingesting all the food. Then a set of small orbs fall all around the herd, and play the following message "Thank you from buying from Dogberts legitimate giant shard filled explosive foods. The food will explode in 3 minutes.  Remember our tag-line: our product will kill you, but its OK because it tastes great!" They all panic, running into one another and mingling into the crowd, and then explode. Into giant shard filled meat lumps. the remaining seekers can't resist, and start eating the shard filled meat lumps. this kills most of them, since there’s so many lumps, and they only have 1HP. [Response to Speed/auth/whatever name i should use: no, I'm don't think this will kill all of them. a decent amount, sure, but not all.]

6000 speakers killed in the sudden onslaught.
+8000 XP

QUOTE (Battlefury @ (time=1484612523))

i use the power of NANOMACHINES, SON to heal Consumer. They are now infused with NANOMACHINE, SON. THEY HARDEN IN RESPONSE TO PSYCHICAL TRAUMA. I then proceed to make a healing potion out of consomme, using only 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000% illegal medical herbs, which i give to Alicia. I then claim copyright on Dogberts, forcing joe to change the name. No, this isn't intended as a full-on counter.  15/20 9/20 4+ from trickle 2+ to trickle

1 health restored to consumer.
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Con Air @ (time=1484616414))

I'm an anti Godmodder. /null

#AndbackandforthAndbackandforthAndbackandforthAndback...

QUOTE (Sp33d0n @ (time=1484628745))

OOC: ups. Auth gently sighs at Alicia. Seriously, Alicia, I think that might be a little bit of an overreaction? Marron hasn't bullied me into anything. Auth then turns to the recently summoned Ette, greeting her in her own sign language. While, Marron, I understand yours. Now, to deal with this pain in my neck. Auth grabs Joe's attention. Just so you know, I also disapprove of this lot, but honestly, if you think that's going to kill all 32500 of them, you'd be wrong. There's too many. And now... Auth throws his hand up into the air, and blood surrounds it. Haemokinesis. A useful power for Vampires, Dhampyrs... Several thousand more Seekers join the Hunt. and summoning more ravenous lunatics. Trust me, I wish they were gone as well, but they are a valuable combat asset while they are here, and I will not let you destroy the value of those assets. Auth sheaths the blade that he has, he doesn't think he'll need it for a good long while. Marron and Ette should recognize it, and the cognitohazard the sheath has. Don't look at it. Seriously. Meanwhile, Auth decides to do something useful now, besides drinking tea. He commands the Underknight. It points its blade into the air, focusing the light around it into the blade. Because Light of Faith can't heal the Underknight (should have said that huh), it heals Alicia and The Living Virus. More Seekers corral around the Beam of Light, summoning even more seekers. This can't end well. Due to the influx of Seekers, they decide it's an opportune time for NORTH. The eldest 4000 of them walk away, and then keep walking. Then get on a boat. Then go to a massive statue of ice and Gant, far far away from the battlefield. A very long way North. And it's cold. They're never seen again. This somehow causes the Seekers to become temporarily more damaging. They all charge at Steffan, and rip and tear into him. He becomes covered in bit marks and scars as the Seekers attempt to eat his still-moving body. They do not appear to care about how they seem. They're like zombies. Alive... scarred... marked zombies. It's petrifying how vicious they are in their cannibalism. Auth sighs and winces, before turning to Betty. Madam, shouldn't you be in jail? As an accomplice to the murder of Mr. Mistree? Should your sister, Ms. Bonny de Famme, be around somewhere? Or is she in jail as well? Also, do not lie to me, Ms. de Famme. You are a stage magician, not a vampire. Auth appears to know quite a bit about the exploits of the Wright and Co. Law Offices, or the Wright Anything Agency, as Betty would know it. I must say that your prank on Ms. Wright was very mean-spirited, and even had Mr. Mistree not ended up dead, it wouldn't have been funny to anyone but yourself and Mr. Retinz. Auth smirks, revealing elongated canine teeth. It is folly to think that you could trick an actual vampire into believing that you are a vampire, especially if said vampire happens to know that you are not. Auth then sighs, and returns to where he was, waiting for someone to make a folly move. ACTION SUMMARY: Auth greets Ette, then uses Haemokinesis to summon more Seekers. The Underknight uses Light of Faith, summoning more seekers and healing Alicia and the Living Virus. The Seekers use NORTH, then attack Steffan. SPECIAL ATTACKS: THE ARMOUR OF ROYALS: 7/20 THE MASTERS OF LONDON: 8/20 +1 to Hez, Ire. (@Con Air I'd have made it "Vote Paul Atishon 2k28", but that's just me.)

You return 3000 seekers from the grave!
Underknight will use Light of Faith, unfortunately, healing can't restore dead members of hordes, this is one of their downsides. Player actions can, but at greatly reduced potency.
The Seekers will use NORTH against Steffan
+5000 XP

[PRETEND TRICKLE'S POST IS HERE]
Ouch, that looks like it hurt. 8000 damage to Ette as a result.
+10000 XP

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1484651128))

15/20 Astral unlocking Cake! 10/15 Edited after conversing with piono. +2 tricklejest continue the deal (5/8?) firstly, this shields steffan from attacks on him this turn to an extent. if you would like to refer to it as some sort of counter, its closest to stopping seekers of the name. the shield also has some magical, minor effect on ette that’s really small but its there and protects her a bit. since last time the animation wasn’t enough to be a smash, I assume this time it won't either, and if it is somehow, have any excess power harm the seakers. of course, after this I repeat my anti-tamper with the reverse-cronal barriers. and point out that i do not run the company that sells shard filled food, so the copyright has done nothing to me.  [small][small]sorryiftheanimationsmakeaproblemijustdon'thavemuchtodointhemorningssoidothis [/small][/small] "hey betty. hey. yeah you. what are you doing outside of the fire dung- oh wait nevermind your not that one oops." "I shall now break the fourth wall" "'ey con why do you use her so much? at least use the better variant I made you. that one isn’t a criminal, and also is way mo- SHINY~~!" "back to my point you should totally use the better one that i can control." "oh, and "auth", the main reason I attacked the seekers is the limit break sounds cool, though them being a threat is part of it"

You bodyblock Steffan from the next attack against him.
+2000 XP

QUOTE (engie @ (time=1484657054))

Primary weapon: X-Corpse Shooter Secondary weapon: Corpse Piercer Tertiary weapon: Corpse Blaster Armor: NA FVS facepalms at the stupidity of the horde of zombies that just arrived. "You imbeciles. Just attack Charge Man! He's already badly injured!" She would say something else, but the high levels of continuous heat finally causes her body to react by making her arms explode into tentacles. Temporary Mutation: 5/5 (USED) Another moment later, she proceeds to sprint around the battlefield, stopping once she crashes into the Balrog and proceeding to clobber it with her new tentacle arms, bashing it again and again and again until eventually she ends up bashing her own arms off from the sheer amount of blunt force. That... does take a while though, due to the fact that her arms caught on fire, and pretty much anyone infected with the same virus as her will gain heavily increased regeneration from being set on fire. Nope, dunno how it works either. "Ow my goddamn arms." ...Time to begin a new charge! Let's Basically Just Set A Zombie On Fire And See What Happens: 2/8 (+1 from urus) +1 to Urus

Zombies will do as you say
20000 damage dealt to the Balrog!
+2000 XP

QUOTE (Con Air @ (time=1484663804))

Betty: Don't make me laugh! I was never arrested, only Reus was! And now, for my next magic trick! Betty slams her parasol into the ground. This irratates a mole man who digs up out of the ground. He found a grenade in there, and he throws it at charge man.

4000 damage from mole grenades.
+6000 XP

QUOTE (TrickleJest @ (time=1484674816))

Fickle uses fire against fire to destroy the Fire Demons. It works. Just... don't question it, okay? CHARGES ----------- Rise of the Charges - 18/20. ??? - 10/10. IN PLACE. ----------- +2 to Battlefury. QUE IS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

3000 damage to one of the fire demons!
+5000 XP

QUOTE (1412 @ (time=1484682843))

Silver wossname: 10/11 Zomboss training facility: 2/20 Cognitohazard you say? How wonderful! Say, that reminds me of me... I pull out me and put myself near Steffan, along with a portable electric generator and inexplicably large supply of bread. My effects should commence shortly.

Joe promptly electrocutes himself trying to be a toaster.
+6000 XP

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1484687836))

"When in my continuous presence for over two months, individuals begin to identify themselves as a toaster. Unless forcibly restrained, these people will ultimately harm themselves in their attempts to emulate my standard functions." "continuous presence for over two months" "over two months" "My effects should commence shortly." "two months" "shortly." you logicaly need some timewarp effect for that to work. (oh, and steffans currently surrounded by purple magic energy barrier.) anyway, that clearly isn’t the right object, because i have just spoken about it in 3ed person. SPC's like that never work. /NULL

Well good thing it didn't work.
Sorta.
You made some darn good toast though.

Tricklejest levels up: Level 4!
Combat Special unlocked: Heroism (Expert)
Limit Break unlocked: CANNOT ENGLISH
Emerald_Mann levels up: Level 1!
Combat Special unlocked: Hard-coded (Basic)

EoTB
The battle starts with Underknight expended Light of Faith, restoring 2 hit points to consumer, 5000 hit points to the living virus, and is cut some slack and restores 5000 to itself.
The Seekers send off 4 of their number up NORTH in search of the name. This fills them all with newfound courage, and using that power to crit, deal 5000 damage to Steffan.
The Zombies, having been redirected, go to the proper source of blood they've been smelling, and deal 2500 damage to Charge Man. The Living Virus follows up on this...
Charge Man glitches, spazms, and fades away in a puff of coding.
Charge man killed! The already torn up Meat shields fade away with him.
Steffan constructs another healing turret and those restore 2000 health to Ette. Ette returns the favor by restoring Steffan to full health.
The fire demons spread their fire once again, dealing 5000 damage to the three main AG entities.
The Balrog lets loose a massive bellowing roar and carves its way through 700 of the Zombies, setting them all on fire, which is fortunately put out by the rain before it becomes a status effect.
The Simumodder decides that Consumer needs to get dunked before they do anything dangerous, and boomerang-throws a pickaxe, which lodges itself in Consumer's head, dealing 3 damage. He then hands out 4 +1s to Ire and Joe.

Everything ticks up/down, those with poison take 2000 damage.

Itinerary:
Regain the entity advantage!
Destroy the fire monsters!
Destroy Steffan and Ette, two healers at once is gonna be a nightmare!

Entity Advantage: [PS]

Weather: Rain (Removes 1 round of burning from any entity on the field..)
Terrain: Crater (No effect)

Simumodder [PS]: Hp: 97/100. Cool and New Portal Armor [A]: 4/6 charges. 15/720 cool and new stacks
Balrog [PS][Elite]: Hp: 123000/150000.
Fire Demons x5 [PS]: Hp: 25000/25000.
Fire Demons [PS]: Hp: 22000/25000.
Ette [PS - Ire]: Hp: 87000 / 100000. 2/3 Bear Hug. High 4 rounds
Steffan [PS - Joebob]: Hp: 60000/60000. 2 RP. Energy shield generator: 2/2
Healing Turrets x2 [PS - Joebob]: Hp: 2000/2000
Underknight [AS - Sp33d0n]: Hp: 12000/25000. Blackened Finale: 3/3. Light of Faith: 1/5. Poisoined 1 round
Seekers of the Name x20500 [AS - Sp33d0n]: Hp: 1/1. State the Name: 4/4.
Living Virus [AS - Emerald_Mann]: Hp: 35500/50000. Poisoned 1 round
Zombies x500 [AS - engie]: Hp: 15/15
Consumer [AS - Player] Hp: 2/10. Golden Sun [A]: 5/5 Ammo. And Then The Sphere Cracked: 7/7. Flesh Interfacing: 7/7.
Hezetor [AS - Player] Hp: 10/10. 1 regen



[/spoiler]

Originally posted on 2017-01-18 15:14:00

Ooh, what's this?

Rise of the Charges - 20/20. [+1 from Redstone].

Suddenly, everything begins to shake...
Out of nowhere, a giant ASCII hand made of previous charges grabs Fickle.

"AY CARAMBA!"

The hand appears to be made of previous charges carried out by Trickle.
A giant ASCII head with two horns pops out of the ground and speaks with a harsh voice.

"You have angered the Gods of the Charge! Now pay the price, fool!"

Fickle manages to slam the hand on the ground using his insane vim and hops on the head.

"GET OFF ME!"
"Hahaha! This is just like bull riding!"

Fickle grabs the creature's horns and tries to control it. The thing smashes into trees and rocks before it finally gives in.

"Okay, okay! You win! What do you need?!"
"You have to help me destroy the Simumodder!"
"Blech. Alright."

Chargeus summoned! Unlike Charge-man, Chargeus uses variations of my previous charges!

Chargeus [AS - TrickleJest]: Hp: 55000/55000.
Damage stat - 7000.

ABILITIES:
Bane of the Pobyos Healers - Deals 12000 damage to Healers instead of 7000.
/placeholder /end - Deals 16000 damage to any entity of choice upon death. Damage to Healers will not be increased.

Fickle then comes up to the Balrog.

"ALRIGHT, YOU MALPARIDO! TIME TO FINISH YOU OFF!"

Fickle takes the Balrog by its horns and tosses him into a puddle, thus extinguishing his flames.
The Balrog squirms in the water and splashes around until Fickle takes the Asterism and cools him down even more.
The MP35 is then drawn along with any given relaxing tune which calms the Balrog down even more.
Fickle then draws the Shishkablam, which failed to be consumed, and explodes the frozen^3 Balrog into outer space. Sure, he's on fire, but that's no match for what's coming.

The Balrog, with a new flame, crashes down on the Battlefield like a comet. How do you fight a comet? With the Comet, of course.
Fickle fuses the MP35 and the Asterism once again to make the Comet and he slices through the Balrog, freezing him along the way.

He then grabs a Temmie from Hammer-Space along with a salt shaker and creates a Salty Tem, or this ==> .
The Temmie runs at the Balrog, who is too cold to do anything and explodes in a jillion shards of Temmie Armor, all of which pierce the Balrog.
The soul of the Temmie then reforms into an annoying dog, or this ==> .
The annoying dog rams into Balrog, who is still shocked from the previous attack and emits a bunch of Anti-Matter Dog Salad which anti-heals Balrog, or damages him.
Before doing its next action, the dog spits out the Legendary Artifact.

"HUH? WHAT'S HAPP-"

The Artifact consumes Fickle's vim, turning him back into Trickle and traps Balrog inside of the Artifact along with the soul of the TemDog.
The TemDog gains vim and determination, turning it into the ultimate dog/cat lord, TEGGO. The Balrog manages to defeat Teggo after a long battle. However, Teggo reforms as Teggo the White and returns to the Artifact!
Balrog, scared and confused inside the Artifact, tries to escape. Unfortunately for him, Teggo the White ROFLstomps him.

Teggo the White takes Balrog and traps him in a second Artifact, then a third, then a fourth, trapping the poor Balrog in an infinite amount of pocket dimensions. Heck yeah.

"Whew. That was something."
"Glad to be back."
"Let's end this."

Trickle breaks the Artifact with his foot, destroying Balrog and Teggo for good. Teggo then reforms yet again to become Teggo the Even Whiter and kicks Balrog's @$$ in Hell, but we're not gonna get in the details.

---

CHARGES
-----------
O)_(O - 3/3. [+2 from Battlefury]. IN PLACE.
??? - 10/10. IN PLACE.
-----------

+1 to Consomme, Redstone.
QUE IS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

Originally posted on 2017-01-18 15:37:00