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 Destroy the Simumodder, Fried Chicken
JOEbob
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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Ancestor
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+1 tricklejest, he doesnt seem to be trying to stop me, and posted.
6/10 blackmist
2/5 sir bob
Spoiler Alert

the red orb changes shape into a flaming scythe with 3 claws/blades, which tears through the air with a single slash, and also burns off the ice you tried to use, battlefury.
a burning red rift appears where the demon was before and starts leaking nothingess.
"What. Do. You. Want.
"my troops dies within 3 seconds of arrival."
"Sooooo?"
Fix this.
I Won't Ask Twice
"woah, calm down"
"i'll do it, i'll do it."
"lousy good for nothing desendants who think they can do whatever they want..."

[b] ". . ."

[/b]
the devil walks out, pretending to hate having to leave hell, but really, he thinks i did better on here then his palace back in his base.
embers and flecks of ash flys through the air, forming into a small orb, and i pull out the red orb-fire orb- thing, red light and actual flames reverse-fading into existance and flowing into it, streams of lava and tourtured souls, as more light gathers before suddenly-
someone wishes to interfere?
how quaint.
C O N S U M E R .
I H E A R Y O U D O N ' T L I K E T H E HEAT.
Get Out of the Kitchen.
sorry, you gotta go.
EDIT: and yes, i mean alicia or whatever alias shes using

i run forward, slashing them in face while the summon that fountain. "DRUGS ARE A BAD. THAT IS NOT A GOOD. THAT IS NOT A GOOD. then i throw them aside and get to work corrupting the fountain, first cloging it with hellfire, then creating a tornado of flame, souls and lava around it and me, so as to not be affected whilst i work. first, i replace the solid matter with obsidion, removing the visual brightness, before i pull out a black crystal, replacing the top of my summoned wand, and begin a strange ritual, black on white, as if a cruel mockery of the world, a large dark dragon with glowing red eyes and white bone plating, its image strange and frightening, and the air is sucked in, as well as anything that breaches my shield, into a small orb, shrinking even as its mass grows, which sucks in all the... stuff... the fountain may spurt. it darkens, light flying from me as the devil sustains the tornado, though it doesnt kill me. i raise my hand, and a bloodred shield appears around it, keeping the world from being destroyed. more and more gets sucked in, before i stop. there, the fountan has been contained. I D I O T S.
having re-read their post, they imply wider effects.
no matter, i calmly turn around and raise my hands.
dark fire, blue and purple appears in each, and i put them both together, a cold blue flame, which twists, flying upwards and toward the hole i created. the hole bursts into icy fire, and the altered world shifts.
the buildings fall, the light corrupts, the sun falls and is eaten by a snake. you should not have tried to right things.
they will only get worse.
i raise my eyes to the "sun" you brought, and a thin beam of pure black flys forth, darker then the darkest void betwean stars, and it pierces your false sun. light leakes from the gap, but the line does not waver, and expands, cracking and shattering the "sun", pulsing and swelling, and a black sludge appears in front of me, melding to my skin and changing it, veins of black all over and my clothes the same, and i split in 66, each equaly strong, and each going another direction. the gems are corrupted, broken to shards which scatter and darken, each painfuly sharp,the "wellsprings of love and food" being cleansed with a simple equasion, proof that life is not worth living and everyone does things for the reward, a cold rational explanation of the world, and a group, 666 strong, of spiders, runs to the food and scitters down to its source, poisoning it and turning it into a source of power for me, all the fountains growing dark growths on the sides, the stone turning red, and my clones reform into one.
there is a dark maisma around him/me, and the dark power the fountains now produce grows, flowing into me and wreathing me in flames, hiding my skin and form, before i rise into the sky, eyes a dark red, almost vengful, and the only visible part of me. the devil rises, ready to help again, and together we raze the earth anew, light draining and changing, the demon reshaping the north to that which it was before, and i reshape the south, black ground and icey rivers, the trees almost white, but clearly blue to an extent, a harsh cold falling over it, as a dome of ice begins to form, fracturing the light in a pattern, but one second spent looking will be your demise. blue fires spring up, and my cruel darkness flows into a small blue orb, which sustains this fractured dome and all inside it, and i turn to the devil who is almost done, pull out my wand, and warp to the sun, fire coalecing on it, before falling back to the battlefield, a meteor wreathed in light, white on black, landing on that fountain and reducing it to rubble, and point the wand at the firey side of the battlefield, clouds of smoke and unearthly light flowing forth, and a wall of flesh rising from the ground forming another dome-half, fire wreathing it, and a dark red gem, too small to see if it didnt glow so bright, floats to the air, sustaining that half.
having stoped them, i continue my previous action, though i expand the tornado of fire in prediction of further attempts, and i think i'll add more detail to my shield, which of cource will disipate after there are no more attacks on me.
the tornado grows, consuming more and more matter, and the devil says "You BETTER make me good resort when this is all over"
sure, sure
red glyphs and intricate symbols fill the air and darken the sky, everywere. beams of bloodred light fly from each, all landing in my wand which has returned to normal with a red crystal, untold power glistening within, just barely outside the swaschild radius, and i plunge my wand into the ground, 6 fissures spliting out, all expanding the tornado on contact, dark voids streaming out with more abominations, dark monsters roaring and running everywere, programed to block whatever might get in the way, and i point to 2 of them, enchanting them with false light, their eyes changing to a brighter tone, gaining a resistance to anything that might use "holy" light to stop me. Hah.

more fire fills the skys, and i twist my hand. a hole in the tornado opens, letting the simumodder through, and more and more of it flows forward. now to strengthen it. i vanish in a orange flash, darkened mist flowing from it temporarily, and arrive in outer space, near a star. my hand sticks out, glowing slightly, and the orb changes form into a really big scepter with the biggest crystal you've ever seen, about the size of a house. plasma flows from the star, drawn toward it, and the shade goes from black, slowly shifting toward white, brighter and brighter, before i warp back to the battlefield, and the stick appears in the ground. oops.

i let go of it, and jump to the crystal, pressing my hand to it. the fire of a star flows forth, strong and powerful, and twists, engulfing my body with a mere fraction of its power. my other hand raises, and orb of plasma gathering in it, and then slowly moves toward the tornado. the orb lands, and the tornado strengthens imesurably, rising in power to the point of being hard to look at, and yet more joins in, thickening and twisting, and the tornado becomes practicaly insourmountable, even an 2 degree kelvin ice cube 1 meter wide would melt to vapor in seconds, and yet more flows in, spacial bending becoming the only option to avoid it.
of course, the rest of my action is inside the tornado.

i have more time and i would realy rather i GET something from this then nothing, so i keep going.
my eye glows as the ebony trees i create shed their skeletal leaves, a small tornado forming around me, and i raise my hand. a small area around me freezes, cold blue fires growing around me, and a light blue aura glistens in my hand. i throw it down and the light around me shifts again, almost becoming a 'cheerfull' tone, corrupt plants growing quickly, and it shifts one final time, small orbs hotter then the sun circleing me, trails of light behind them, and i shift Again, despite the "final", a black cloak appearing and everything from before being sucked in, a small red gem the size of a pea appears, slightly darkened red, that is. i raise the gem and black light flows forth, growing and spinning before finaly becoming yet another shield around the proceeds. i should hope this is enough.
i lift the wand, drawing in more death and despair, as the devil glows, needing no tool, even the fire demons being drawn toward him, though they are able to resist.
the devil barks at them "MAGGOTS! Get to work on this battlefield,that consumer fool did a number on my resort."
the pain around us is almost tangible, though the the temprature has actualy droped to a frigged 1 degree, despite the firestorm around us being so vast. finaly, there is enough power gathered, and a strange light rises from the orb, tendrils of red energy flickering in and out of existance, as a tether and beam connect it to me and the devil, respectivly. the tether pulses as if filled with blood, dark red light glistening off its surface, as small cracks appear in the world and ridges like blood seem to fade into existance, a pentagram appearing on the ground unbidden, and yet even more gathers, orange glpyhs and thyme-colored wind swirling around and brown light rising from the cracks that have already formed, gouls and wisps of ruby light flying forth, more yet more, untill one cannot even see. and it goes on longer still, burning and crackeling with power, evil and pain gaining solid manifestations, before. . .


the light stops, and the orb of ash glows a very red, tendrils expanding and writhing, and the substance changes to blazeium, a totaly real hell ore. it turns trasperant, glistening a brighter red, and the orb is done. still, there is more to it.

i go read in a giant librarby in my own mind for ~82572 years, then go back to now and implement a strange pedestal, placing the orb on it. the effect causes any PS entitys summoned by terrain to not killed by terrain or weather statuses for their first 10 rounds of existance, as well as protecting them for status effects from either of those causes.

still, i have to do more, and so i raise my hand and a dark light gathers, forming a double of me, which twists and spins in the light,shriveling,and forms a shield over a large area to darken it. it jumps off, light glistening, before 3 dark orange bands form and spin, detail increasing, on and on, visions of triving citys and burned ruins flashing withing, and the color shifts to red, runes on them, and a thick fog dessends on the area, beams becoming visible and such, and everything else being boscured, burning fire forming and changing the smoke, and strange symbols appear via light sources, one last symbol after a full minute, an 1/2 closed eye.

the world shifts, tips, and almost seems to fall, like everyone just got very, very drunk, a distorted flash in this moment of confusion and instability, a high shriek, and the world rights itself. ghosts and flames spin through the air, rocks rising and falling in an instant, dark wisps and mutant freaks seeming to be there, but slowly, and surely, the world returns to normal.
just one thing.
one.
there is a temple around the orb, black as knight and warded via magic, glyphs of protection appearing everywere if an attack is attempted.
nobody knows what happened, but the world... changed, in that moment.

strange.

very, very, strange.


Originally posted on 2017-01-05 18:00:00
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Hezetor
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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It appears that Hezetor can act again, apparently the illegally downloaded version that is in this simulation is not that stable.
He finally notices what Joebob has done to his magnificent work.

What!? No one touches my cathedral!

Hezetor, taking advantage of the exact moment when Joebob went into his own mind for ~82572 years, attacks him launching a full set of pots over his head at incredible speed, wait, not normal pots, but incredibly durable stainless steel pots, this clearly confuses him enough to forget to place the pedestal in the first place.
Not only this, but the moment he summons his clone Hezetor moves slightly his hand and 10 spears of holy light appear from the floor of the cathedral impaling him immediately, rendering null his actions.
He then raises his hands to the sky and starts chanting ancient words in a language, while on the floor a giant while magic circle appears, as he continues to chant the circle expands to cover the whole cathedral (yes we may be in San Francisco, but still inside a cathedral, this is clearly mandatory), when he finishes the circle fills the cathedral of light as many purifying runes appear and glow in the air, then as he starts to rhythmically beat an ancient staff on the floor the intensity of the light starts too increase, more and more, until the whole cathedral is bathed in holy light.
When the light goes away everything is way holier than before, well not actually that much more if we are in San Francisco, if we are not, we probably are by now.



---------

+1 to Speed
7/10 +1 from past!Consumer
4/10

Originally posted on 2017-01-05 21:19:00

--------------------
...



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Emerald_Mann
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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Mage
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Virus: 6/10
AI:7/10
I run around screaming, before punting a Terrifying Porkchop into the pigs mouth, the sheer force of the kick driving the porkchop through the pigs body and out the other side. Then I find a convenient bucket of water that I dump on myself

Originally posted on 2017-01-05 23:27:00
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Sp33d0n
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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The Eternal Author
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ACTIVATED: CRUSADE OF THE LOST

The Author clenches his hand, and cautiously swings it forward, opening his hand afterwards. Ink leaps to the area in front of him, forming the shape of a valiant knight. Auth then clenches his fist again, and pulls his arm back. Detail is put into the knight's armour, gaps for a visor, a sheath on its hip, containing a sword, and decorations on the helmet. A gleaming red sigil appears on its chestplate.

Meet the Underknight. Also known as me, but not. He can do everything I can, but with a more offensive twist.

The Underknight kneels, before drawing its sword and points it silently at the Terror Pig. It inclines its head, before charging at the Terror Pig, dodge rolling like it's Dark Souls or something, and then stabs the Terror Pig in the hoof, before leaping up and stabbing it in the head, before rolling back away.

Meanwhile, Auth laughs.

Good sir, I think not.

Ink is jettisoned from Auth, slamming into Joe with a whole tonne of force.

The arena's going to change. You can not stop it without putting more effort in than that. Furthermore, I fail to see why you're attacking somebody who's not on the field. Do you mean Ms. Cambridge?

Auth states, before slamming Joe into a few dozen walls, hopefully shattering the orb, but Auth just wants it do not hit the pedestal.

Stats:
THE UNDERKNIGHT:
HP: 25k ATK: 4000

Skills:
Blackened Finale: Instantly defeat an enemy at 20% HP or less. 1/3
Light of Faith: Restore 5000 HP to three random allies. 1/5

ACTION SUMMARY:

The Underknight is summoned, and stabs up the Terror Pig.

Meanwhile, Auth assists Hezetor in Nullifying Joe's action.

SPECIAL ATTACKS:

CRUSADE OF THE LOST: ACTIVATED

SEEKERS OF THE NAME: READY (+1 from Hez)

+1 to Trickle

Originally posted on 2017-01-06 01:15:00

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They say that there's no rest for the wicked, until they close their eyes for good.

As someone wicked, fundamentally, I disagree. One may always repent. I may have done terrible things in the past. That's why I help this coward now.
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Sparked
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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Wandering Goddess
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7/10 Swordstorm

+1 Trickle

The Free Modeled Mecha sprays itself with water, hopefully taking burn off itself or at least reducing the time it has it.

sparkysfaint rains multiple free modeled swords on the Terror Pig, and then goes on to make a super annoying zombie to attack the Terror Pig, and removes it after the zombie bites the Terror Pig a bunch of times.

Originally posted on 2017-01-06 05:46:00

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You are already dead.

Starlight Document: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1NZl...dit?usp=sharing
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pionoplayer
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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Weaver of Fates
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Location: Where ever there is chaos to be created
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QUOTE (Battlefury @ (time=1483582947))
I use Woof on the terror porkchops

4/5 Max's Head
4/10 Enigma
1+ to consumer

Combat Special: WOOF (basic)
Battlefury walks towards his enemy. Something seems off about him, he seems slightly... furrier than usual (whether or not that's possible varies, but bear with me). He walks up to them, and gets closer, closer, uncomfortably close... He utters a single word to them... "bork." And suddenly the ground rumbles. Bfury's oponent looks around in terror, and turns around to discover a swarm of small, white dogs bounding across the battlefield towards them. They scream in fear but start running too late, and are crushed underneath the overwhelming weight of DOG.
6 terrifying porkchops killed.
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Jondanger23 @ (time=1483583270))
I toss a healbomb at the Ninjaneer, who in turn repairs the Level 2 Sentry, who in turn proceeds to gun down some Porkchops.


Actually...

I give the Ninjaneer a fire-proof suit.

He then repairs the sentry, which guns down some porkchops.

Machete Mechanic: 1/5

You attempt to give the Ninjaneer a fireproof suit but it burns up in the fire.
You can't give a strong perk like that with a one-sentence action friendo.
Regardless, orders submitted.
+2000 XP

QUOTE (Urus @ (time=1483595286))
Sheriff Clint Cactus uses Snake In My Boot against the Terrifying Porkchops.

+1 to Talist
3/5 Golden Lasso
3/10 Ten Gallon Hat

Combat Special: Snake In My Boot (basic)
Sheriff Clint Cactus looks out across the battlefield. Of any townn he's been in, this is by far the roughest one. But daggum he's sheriff round these parts and darned if he ain't gonna instill some order here. His idle ruminations are interrupted by a strange feeling in his boot. It suddenly feels like there's something large in there with his foot... something... long and... Sheriff Clint Cactus pulls it off and throws it with a cry of "THERES A SNAKE IN MY BOOT" sending the boot and the rubber rattlesnake flying at high speed. Unfortunately (or fortunately I guess, depending on your point of view) there's something to stop it. Fortunately (or unfortunately) that happens to be one of the same darn ruffians that's been rustling up all the snakes. Clint Cactus walks, over, retrieves his boot, and smacks the perpetrator over the head with his boot, puts it back on, and walks off.
6 terrifying porkchops killed.
+5000 XP

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1483596949))
5/10 Arsenal of the Tactician. name changing since a lot of artifacts at once is bad?
changed to: 5/10 Blackmist
old tricks can still be good tricks.
(also isnt the portal armor 2 artifacts, technicaly? one to produce the charge and one to store it.)
new charge: 1/5 Sir Bob (can i raise the charge size if i get +1ed?)
once again, i am willing to trade +1's
action: first i cover myself in pork armor on a hope of also getting a crit.
summary of attack: kill ninjaneer for like 1 paragraph then spend 2-3 more on tincube. of note is that his suit won't help cuz a sword can cut through it, firey or not.
Spoiler Alert
then i run over to the ninjaneer, vault over it with a large staff, and use the Arsenal of Burning to create a flaming sword. i walk forward, slicing at him and deflecting, before i jump up, and land a downward blow. the arsenal morphs mid-jump into a warhammer, crushing the 'neer, and changes into a firey whip, which obviosly deals more because of the firestorm, and is also firey, and i swing it, it wraps around the 'neer, burning its skin and branding it, and the orb morphs into another sword, this one appearing inside the 'neer due to proximity, and starts to burn, and burn, and burn, until there is nothing left.
i turn.
well, my teraforming went well, but it looks like he forgot to account for firestorm damage. i'll fix that on my next turn.
the tincubes gotta die first.
i think i'll go kill that now.
firey glyphs which i made last turn, scattered around, glow, but only to me. i run over one in the direction of the cube and it flashes, accelerating me before diming, and i strike the cube, melting off a fragment with my blade, and land on the floor 4 meters away. the orb morphs to the hellwand from before, and some glyphs at its feet-analouge light up. normaly it might try to run, maybe. but a small firey wall deters it, and the glyph glows brighter and brighter, before i swing the wand back and a fire-burst flys up, burning the cube. now this isnt enough to kill it, i would think, so i run through the smoke, launching firey meteors around me, and hear one of them hit metal.
jackpot.
the wand glows, visible even through the smog, and one more meteor appears, rather large. it flys downward, and i appear on top,before jumping off and floating in the air under my own power, a light aura of fire around me. i look down, and force the dust to settle. shoot, still alive. what is it made of? oh, right. tin.
a bow appears in my hands, firey enchanted of course, and an arrow froms from the metal remains of the cube, which fly into it. i draw back the bow, aiming at my enemy, and fire, a burning arrow flying forth. now this would be a great, dramatic way to kill it, but it doesnt make much sense, so then i replace the bow with a fire-enchanted grenade launcher, and launch a (fire) cluster bomb.
that should do it.


NOTE: i will once again +1 the next person to post.

Having to have two artifacts in order for either to work is stupid, so I interpreted it as you summoning one artifact and then upgrading it.
You kill the last porkchop. You sadly do not get a crit from it as you are not made of pork. You don't seem to need it though.
Your chain of attacks vanquishes the TinCube, but sadly not the Ninjaneer, because bfury comes over and hits you over the head with a guitar instead.
+7500 XP

QUOTE (ConsumerOfAll @ (time=1483633383))
Alicia returns from being asleep, my standard excuse for being AFK. She then reaches out, and grabs a simulated copy of Voidic Maverick, Ergot that Grows On Eel's first work.

Voidic Maverick is the first part of a septology of web serials based of a text adventure. I wouldn’t deign to spoil it despite Ergot loathing hiding spoilers from him, but the basic gist of it is that a princess from another dimension is sent to a school ran by an incarnation of Death to learn ‘proper’ behaviour, mainly so that her mother can live through her when she rules, metaphorically. The princess, decides to explore the school, and we have fun schoolyard adventures.

Fun.

Continuing onwards, LSD is derived from ergotamine, a chemical in ergot. LSD and ergotamine is also composed of Carbon, Hydrogen, Nitrogen and Oxygen. CHNO. CHN is an abbreviation of a trio of allied Descendants - ConsumerOfAll / Annis Valencia*, Alpha Godmodder, Hezetor, Overlord of the Emerged Lands and Nyarlathotep, the Crawling Chaos. Ergot that Grows On Eels is also based off Leery E, the distorted form of Erelye. LSD is truly a magical substance, containing symbolism about 4 descendants and being God’s communicator all at once.

*Annis Valencia will be simulated at one point, but keep in that she is not Alicia Cambridge. aka Joe stop bullying Annis you meanie.

Wait, what was that last part?

Alicia takes out the copy of Voidic Maverick and raises it in the air, turning it into LSD crystals, which rain down on the Battlefield. The battlefield mutates and shifts before, in the midst of the hellfire, the sun shines down, and all hear Holy, holy, holy.

Universal joy. Transcendent love. The world mutates, the sun piercing through the hell fire, his loving eyes spreading across the battlefield. He comes down and wellsprings of love and food pop up, hellfire being purged from the cathedral. The floor is gems and the lights are watchers and all is love, under the sun holy, holy, holy.

A fountain bursts from underneath, and all the world’s issues float away. The world was always this perfect, this beautiful, over in eternity transcendent, the divine light cascading into us.

Hell and the punishments of the right hand are wiped away, no hellfire, no brimstone, just divine light communicated by the sacred crystal, LSD.
/////
The Light Holy was a computer virus designed in an alternate Earth. Designed by AngelicMathematica, it was used on simulations with code executed from psychedelic items to co opt them and modify the world using flesh interfaces.



Alicia inputs some code about her friends and the supernatural abilities that they have for reasons. She then drops a 10 post charge into the simulation, and Code!Maria is generated. She then pulls out a golden gun from the codebase she got San Francisco from.


Maria the Mayor / umbralAggressor [AS - Consumer] Hp: 5/5. Shroud: 1/3. Thamiel's Retribution: 1/4. Constructed: 1/5. Mary the Mayor: 1/10.
Playerlike: Takes player HP in damage.
Voidic Retribution: All attackers take light damage.

Shroud: Maria gains a shroud, a barrier with normal HP.
Thamiel's Retribution: The devil stops taking deals with Joe for a few seconds to enhance Maria's retribution skills, making them more painful and hurt significantly more, in addition to granting Voidburn, which I suspect is partly composed of edge. Oh, yeah, also, Thamiel, the devil portrayed 100% accurately and as such an evil, evil [REDACTED FOR PIONO SENSIBILITIES].
Constructed: Maria creates a darkness construct, a super weak entity made from darkness. What do you think that is?
Mary the Mayor: Maria transcends. What this entails is to be either made up on the spot if it is used or written the moment Piono starts badgering me for stats.
/////
[A] Golden Sun: 5/5 Ammo. And Then The Sphere Cracked: 1/7. Flesh Interfacing: 1/7.
Golden Sun: Sorry, did the Holy Holy Holy not blast you out of here? Well, bad news for you, the Golden Sun is divine light, encrypted and then forced into a pistol, powered by LSD crystals. On usage, deals damage and makes the target High, even though I don't know what the latter does.
And Then The Sphere Cracked: Sufficiently weak (3 - 5 charge?) and high entities are nerfed further and brainwashed permanently to the wielder's side. Alternatively, if that is too strong, Alicia takes control of the victim's action for a piono-decided amount of turns.
Flesh Interfacing: A High target turns into a Flesh Interface, disabling their action until the effect is removed and allowing anybody to tap into their abilities.

This weapon can be reloaded, one ammo per actions. Both specials take 3 ammo.
/////

Terrain: San Francisco Cathedral (Entities have a ??% percent chance of gaining High per turn.
Weather: The Skies Above (Airborn entities automatically become High.)
Buff/nerf as needed, and probably increase the charge time on the Golden Sun.



Maria will create darkness tendrils and annihilate as many Terrifying Porkchops as possible.
Artifice for Saltmeisters [10/10] [+2 from Doggo]
The Mayor Is [10/10]
+1 to Trickster

You attempt to swirl up a massive amount of LSD to undo the first and retake the terrain and weather...
And get JOEbob'd unsurprisingly enough. I don't think this post would've been enough to change them both so soon after their initial change anyways.
Several changes were made to both the entity and gun, these were discussed over Discord.
+4000 XP

QUOTE (TrickleJest @ (time=1483633391))
Holy crap! So many charges! I'm just drowing in these fucking charges!!

( ° ʖ °) - 10/10

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a giant lonny face emerges on the battlefield!

( ° ʖ °) - Lonnor, Prince of the Lonnies [AS - TrickleJest]: Hp: 30,000/30,000.

He's supposed to have more HP and actual DMG, but I'm trading that in for special perks. Lonnor is a healing entity, so he cannot attack. At all.
Lonnor heals TinCube, hopefully healing him a lot.
Trickle also heals TinCube using the eleven herbs and spices and also a bit of the Colonel's good ol' magic. (kek).
TinCube himself gets insanely aggressive and gets so mad that he jumps at Terror Pig and uses his special charged move.



CHARGES
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Gates of Alternia - 6/10 [+1 from Joe, Consomme].
/placeholder - 1/10
-----------

+1 to Battlefury.
QUE IS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

Lonnor summoned.
Unfortunately TinCube has bitten the dust, no healing can help him now...
+4000 XP

QUOTE (Battlefury @ (time=1483633905))
I somehow grant the Ninjaneer the holy divine spark of building machines using water, allowing for him to properly counter JOEbob's attack! Inspired, he promptly builds a squirt gun level three sentry! It promptly doses the Arsenal Of Fire's various forms with enough water that JOE is forced to watch as each and every weapon he forms fizzled out rapidly. Meanwhile, the Ninjaneer builds multiple guns that spray liquid nitrogen all over Joe, freezing him in place. The Ninjaneer then throws all the guns he just built at Joe, who is promptly frozen into an ice statue, moments before the Ninjaneer smashs Joe over the head with a guitar.

It then turns out that this somehow takes up my action.



6/10 +1 trick;e
6/10  +1 trickle

1+ to consumer

You come up to Joe right after he finishes killing TinCube and smash the guitar over his head. Attack successfully blocked.
+4000 XP

QUOTE (ConsumerOfAll @ (time=1483634089))
Holy, Holy, Holy, Part Deux [3/10] [+2 from Doggo]
Worms But One Is Crawling Up My Skin [1/10]
+1 Trickster

#PUUUUUNKS
+2000 XP

QUOTE (TrickleJest @ (time=1483634123))
kek
+1 to battlefury

#tricklemepink
+2000 XP

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1483639232))
+1 tricklejest, he doesnt seem to be trying to stop me, and posted.
6/10 blackmist
2/5 sir bob
Spoiler Alert

the red orb changes shape into a flaming scythe with 3 claws/blades, which tears through the air with a single slash, and also burns off the ice you tried to use, battlefury.
a burning red rift appears where the demon was before and starts leaking nothingess.
"What. Do. You. Want.
"my troops dies within 3 seconds of arrival."
"Sooooo?"
Fix this.
I Won't Ask Twice
"woah, calm down"
"i'll do it, i'll do it."
"lousy good for nothing desendants who think they can do whatever they want..."

[b] ". . ."

[/b]
the devil walks out, pretending to hate having to leave hell, but really, he thinks i did better on here then his palace back in his base.
embers and flecks of ash flys through the air, forming into a small orb, and i pull out the red orb-fire orb- thing, red light and actual flames reverse-fading into existance and flowing into it, streams of lava and tourtured souls, as more light gathers before suddenly-
someone wishes to interfere?
how quaint.
C O N S U M E R .
I H E A R Y O U D O N ' T L I K E T H E HEAT.
Get Out of the Kitchen.
sorry, you gotta go.
EDIT: and yes, i mean alicia or whatever alias shes using

i run forward, slashing them in face while the summon that fountain. "DRUGS ARE A BAD. THAT IS NOT A GOOD. THAT IS NOT A GOOD. then i throw them aside and get to work corrupting the fountain, first cloging it with hellfire, then creating a tornado of flame, souls and lava around it and me, so as to not be affected whilst i work. first, i replace the solid matter with obsidion, removing the visual brightness, before i pull out a black crystal, replacing the top of my summoned wand, and begin a strange ritual, black on white, as if a cruel mockery of the world, a large dark dragon with glowing red eyes and white bone plating, its image strange and frightening, and the air is sucked in, as well as anything that breaches my shield, into a small orb, shrinking even as its mass grows, which sucks in all the... stuff... the fountain may spurt. it darkens, light flying from me as the devil sustains the tornado, though it doesnt kill me. i raise my hand, and a bloodred shield appears around it, keeping the world from being destroyed. more and more gets sucked in, before i stop. there, the fountan has been contained. I D I O T S.
having re-read their post, they imply wider effects.
no matter, i calmly turn around and raise my hands.
dark fire, blue and purple appears in each, and i put them both together, a cold blue flame, which twists, flying upwards and toward the hole i created. the hole bursts into icy fire, and the altered world shifts.
the buildings fall, the light corrupts, the sun falls and is eaten by a snake. you should not have tried to right things.
they will only get worse.
i raise my eyes to the "sun" you brought, and a thin beam of pure black flys forth, darker then the darkest void betwean stars, and it pierces your false sun. light leakes from the gap, but the line does not waver, and expands, cracking and shattering the "sun", pulsing and swelling, and a black sludge appears in front of me, melding to my skin and changing it, veins of black all over and my clothes the same, and i split in 66, each equaly strong, and each going another direction. the gems are corrupted, broken to shards which scatter and darken, each painfuly sharp,the "wellsprings of love and food" being cleansed with a simple equasion, proof that life is not worth living and everyone does things for the reward, a cold rational explanation of the world, and a group, 666 strong, of spiders, runs to the food and scitters down to its source, poisoning it and turning it into a source of power for me, all the fountains growing dark growths on the sides, the stone turning red, and my clones reform into one.
there is a dark maisma around him/me, and the dark power the fountains now produce grows, flowing into me and wreathing me in flames, hiding my skin and form, before i rise into the sky, eyes a dark red, almost vengful, and the only visible part of me. the devil rises, ready to help again, and together we raze the earth anew, light draining and changing, the demon reshaping the north to that which it was before, and i reshape the south, black ground and icey rivers, the trees almost white, but clearly blue to an extent, a harsh cold falling over it, as a dome of ice begins to form, fracturing the light in a pattern, but one second spent looking will be your demise. blue fires spring up, and my cruel darkness flows into a small blue orb, which sustains this fractured dome and all inside it, and i turn to the devil who is almost done, pull out my wand, and warp to the sun, fire coalecing on it, before falling back to the battlefield, a meteor wreathed in light, white on black, landing on that fountain and reducing it to rubble, and point the wand at the firey side of the battlefield, clouds of smoke and unearthly light flowing forth, and a wall of flesh rising from the ground forming another dome-half, fire wreathing it, and a dark red gem, too small to see if it didnt glow so bright, floats to the air, sustaining that half.     
having stoped them, i continue my previous action, though i expand the tornado of fire in prediction of further attempts, and i think i'll add more detail to my shield, which of cource will disipate after there are no more attacks on me.
the tornado grows, consuming more and more matter, and the devil says "You BETTER make me good resort when this is all over"
sure, sure
red glyphs and intricate symbols fill the air and darken the sky, everywere. beams of bloodred light fly from each, all landing in my wand which has returned to normal with a red crystal, untold power glistening within, just barely outside the swaschild radius, and i plunge my wand into the ground, 6 fissures spliting out, all expanding the tornado on contact, dark voids streaming out with more abominations, dark monsters roaring and running everywere, programed to block whatever might get in the way, and i point to 2 of them, enchanting them with false light, their eyes changing to a brighter tone, gaining a resistance to anything that might use "holy" light to stop me. Hah.

more fire fills the skys, and i twist my hand. a hole in the tornado opens, letting the simumodder through, and more and more of it flows forward. now to strengthen it. i vanish in a orange flash, darkened mist flowing from it temporarily, and arrive in outer space, near a star. my hand sticks out, glowing slightly, and the orb changes form into a really big scepter with the biggest crystal you've ever seen, about the size of a house. plasma flows from the star, drawn toward it, and the shade goes from black, slowly shifting toward white,  brighter and brighter, before i warp back to the battlefield, and the stick appears in the ground. oops.

i let go of it, and jump to the crystal, pressing my hand to it. the fire of a star flows forth, strong and powerful, and twists, engulfing my body with a mere fraction of its power. my other hand raises, and orb of plasma gathering in it, and then slowly moves toward the tornado. the orb lands, and the tornado strengthens imesurably, rising in power to the point of being hard to look at, and yet more joins in, thickening and twisting, and the tornado becomes practicaly insourmountable, even an 2 degree kelvin ice cube 1 meter wide would melt to vapor in seconds, and yet more flows in, spacial bending becoming the only option to avoid it.
of course, the rest of my action is inside the tornado. 

i have more time and i would realy rather i GET something from this then nothing, so i keep going.
my eye glows as the ebony trees i create shed their skeletal leaves, a small tornado forming around me, and i raise my hand. a small area around me freezes, cold blue fires growing around me, and a light blue aura glistens in my hand. i throw it down and the light around me shifts again, almost becoming a 'cheerfull' tone, corrupt plants growing quickly, and it shifts one final time, small orbs hotter then the sun circleing me, trails of light behind them, and i shift Again, despite the "final", a black cloak appearing and everything from before being sucked in, a small red gem the size of a pea appears, slightly darkened red, that is. i raise the gem and black light flows forth, growing and spinning before finaly becoming yet another shield around the proceeds. i should hope this is enough.
i lift the wand, drawing in more death and despair, as the devil glows, needing no tool, even the fire demons being drawn toward him, though they are able to resist.
the devil barks at them "MAGGOTS! Get to work on this battlefield,that consumer fool did a number on my resort."
the pain around us is almost tangible, though the the temprature has actualy droped to a frigged 1 degree, despite the firestorm around us being so vast. finaly, there is enough power gathered, and a strange light rises from the orb, tendrils of red energy flickering in and out of existance, as a tether and beam connect it to me and the devil, respectivly. the tether pulses as if filled with blood, dark red light glistening off its surface, as small cracks appear in the world and ridges like blood seem to fade into existance, a pentagram appearing on the ground unbidden, and yet even more gathers, orange glpyhs and thyme-colored wind swirling around and brown light rising from the cracks that have already formed, gouls and wisps of ruby light flying forth, more yet more, untill one cannot even see. and it goes on longer still, burning and crackeling with power, evil and pain gaining solid manifestations, before. . .


the light stops, and the orb of ash glows a very red, tendrils expanding and writhing, and the substance changes to blazeium, a totaly real hell ore. it turns trasperant, glistening a brighter red, and the orb is done. still, there is more to it.

i go read in a giant librarby in my own mind for ~82572 years, then go back to now and implement a strange pedestal, placing the orb on it. the effect causes any PS entitys summoned by terrain to not killed by terrain or weather statuses for their first 10 rounds of existance, as well as protecting them for status effects from either of those causes.

still, i have to do more, and so i raise my hand and a dark light gathers, forming a double of me, which twists and spins in the light,shriveling,and forms a shield over a large area to darken it. it jumps off, light glistening, before 3 dark orange bands form and spin, detail increasing, on and on, visions of triving citys and burned ruins flashing withing, and the color shifts to red, runes on them, and a thick fog dessends on the area, beams becoming visible and such, and everything else being boscured, burning fire forming and changing the smoke, and strange symbols appear via light sources, one last symbol after a full minute, an 1/2 closed eye.

the world shifts, tips, and almost seems to fall, like everyone just got very, very drunk, a distorted flash in this moment of confusion and instability, a high shriek, and the world rights itself. ghosts and flames spin through the air, rocks rising and falling in an instant, dark wisps and mutant freaks seeming to be there, but slowly, and surely, the world returns to normal.
just one thing.
one.
there is a temple around the orb, black as knight and warded via magic, glyphs of protection appearing everywere if an attack is attempted.
nobody knows what happened, but the world... changed, in that moment.

strange.

very, very, strange.

Okay, in terms of sheer size your post is kind of impressive, and would even hit pseudo-longpost levels...
The problem is its a mess. Captilization is inconsistent, formatting (or rather lack of it) makes it painful to read and there's typos EVERYWHERE.
I don't even know if you were just trying to maintain the terrain and weather, or if there were supposed to be other effects thrown in there.

You put enough effort into it to get it this long, but seriously, this thing is almost unreadable, I couldn't give you extra bonuses even if I wanted to because I'm not certain what this was supposed to accomplish.
Anyways, the attempts to change the terrain/weather get JOEbob'd.
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Hezetor @ (time=1483651185))
It appears that Hezetor can act again, apparently the illegally downloaded version that is in this simulation is not that stable.
He finally notices what Joebob has done to his magnificent work.

What!? No one touches my cathedral!

Hezetor, taking advantage of the exact moment when Joebob went into his own mind for  ~82572 years, attacks him launching a full set of pots over his head at incredible speed, wait, not normal pots, but incredibly durable stainless steel pots, this clearly confuses him enough to forget to place the pedestal in the first place.
Not only this, but the moment he summons his clone Hezetor moves slightly his hand and 10 spears of holy light appear from the floor of the cathedral impaling him immediately, rendering null his actions.
He then raises his hands to the sky and starts chanting ancient words in a language, while on the floor a giant while magic circle appears, as he continues to chant the circle expands to cover the whole cathedral (yes we may be in San Francisco, but still inside a cathedral, this is clearly mandatory), when he finishes the circle fills the cathedral of light as many purifying runes appear and glow in the air, then as he starts to rhythmically beat an ancient staff on the floor the intensity of the light starts too increase, more and more, until the whole cathedral is bathed in holy light.
When the light goes away everything is way holier than before, well not actually that much more if we are in San Francisco, if we are not, we probably are by now.



---------

+1 to Speed
7/10 +1 from past!Consumer
4/10

Unfortunately, although you put in much effort to attempt to restore your cathedral to its former glory... the terrain and weather were changed just last round so JOE has inertia on his side still.
You are unsuccessful...
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Emerald_Mann @ (time=1483658836))
Virus: 6/10
AI:7/10
I run around screaming, before punting a Terrifying Porkchop into the pigs mouth, the sheer force of the kick driving the porkchop through the pigs body and out the other side. Then I find a convenient bucket of water that I dump on myself

There are no Terrifying Porkchops so you settle for kicking the Terror Pig in the teeth. 3000 damage. Terrifying Porkchop summoned.

QUOTE (Sp33d0n @ (time=1483665359))
ACTIVATED: CRUSADE OF THE LOST

The Author clenches his hand, and cautiously swings it forward, opening his hand afterwards. Ink leaps to the area in front of him, forming the shape of a valiant knight. Auth then clenches his fist again, and pulls his arm back. Detail is put into the knight's armour, gaps for a visor, a sheath on its hip, containing a sword, and decorations on the helmet. A gleaming red sigil appears on its chestplate.

Meet the Underknight. Also known as me, but not. He can do everything I can, but with a more offensive twist.

The Underknight kneels, before drawing its sword and points it silently at the Terror Pig. It inclines its head, before charging at the Terror Pig, dodge rolling like it's Dark Souls or something, and then stabs the Terror Pig in the hoof, before leaping up and stabbing it in the head, before rolling back away.

Meanwhile, Auth laughs.

Good sir, I think not.

Ink is jettisoned from Auth, slamming into Joe with a whole tonne of force.

The arena's going to change. You can not stop it without putting more effort in than that. Furthermore, I fail to see why you're attacking somebody who's not on the field. Do you mean Ms. Cambridge?

Auth states, before slamming Joe into a few dozen walls, hopefully shattering the orb, but Auth just wants it do not hit the pedestal.

Stats:
THE UNDERKNIGHT:
HP: 25k ATK: 4000

Skills:
Blackened Finale: Instantly defeat an enemy at 20% HP or less. 1/3
Light of Faith: Restore 5000 HP to three random allies. 1/5

ACTION SUMMARY:

The Underknight is summoned, and stabs up the Terror Pig.

Meanwhile, Auth assists Hezetor in Nullifying Joe's action.

SPECIAL ATTACKS:

CRUSADE OF THE LOST: ACTIVATED

SEEKERS OF THE NAME: READY (+1 from Hez)

+1 to Trickle

Oof, almost, but not quite. Joe, badly formatted as it may be, just drop several hundred words on something that the game was leaning towards already.
The knight's stats look very good though!
+5000 XP

QUOTE (Redstonetam15 @ (time=1483681612))
7/10 Swordstorm

+1 Trickle

The Free Modeled Mecha sprays itself with water, hopefully taking burn off itself or at least reducing the time it has it.

sparkysfaint rains multiple free modeled swords on the Terror Pig, and then goes on to make a super annoying zombie to attack the Terror Pig, and removes it after the zombie bites the Terror Pig a bunch of times.

I would say the Free Modeled Mecha could try that, except the weather means it would just immediately regain all of that time.
3000 damage to the Terror Pig, terrifying porkchop summoned!
+5000 XP

JOEbob levels up: "JOEmob"
Combat Special acquired: Infernal Wrath (basic)
Redstone levels up: "Dusty"
Combat Special acquired: Free Model Mason (basic)

EoTB:
The first thing that happens is the Ninjaneer gives its sentry a good thwack, restoring it to full health. The next thing that happens is that Maria and the sentry team up and unleash a storm of death upon the porkchops, killing both of them.
The Underknight charges forward into the Terror Pig, and with Speed's blessing, combo-strikes out of 6000 of its hitpoints! Terrifying porkchop summoned. The Free Modeled Mecha opens fire on the Terror Pig as well, dealing 2500 more damage, but summoning another Terrifying Porkchop.
Lonnor, lacking a TinCube to heal, goes for the next best target: the Ninjaneer. 5000 health is restored (you better be heaving a sigh of relief right now jon.)
It is then the PS's turn to break things. The terrifying porkchops, having all been slaughtered, have basically no firepower, and settle for dealing 1000 damage to the sentry.
And then the Terror Pig eats them. The Terror Pig eats the porkchops, restoring 6000 health to itself, then squeals in anger and charges straight at the AS lines, upending Lonnor and the Underknight for 8000 damage each and dealing 1 damage to Maria, who counterattacks for 2000.
The Fire demons opt to deal 2500 damage to the Free Modeled mecha and Ninjaneer.
The Simumodder walks up to Maria, and waves kindly. She stares at him suspiciously, and doesn't realize that she's staring at a decoy Simumodder until she hears a click, and looks down to discover that the Golden Sun has been completely unloaded. Oops, who did that?
Everything ticks down, everything catches on fire, JOE's bots die instantly and 2500 damage is administered to essentially everybody, except Maria, who only takes 1.

Itinerary:
Destroy the Simumodder!
Kill the Terror Pig
Keep the Porkchop population down.
Fix the weather before all of your entities die at once.

Entity Advantage: [AS]

Weather: Firestorm (Every entity that has fewer than 3 rounds of burning has it set to that amount during upkeep.)
Terrain: Infernal Cathedral/Factory (Spawns two Unholy Robots every round. Would be setting things on fire too but the firestorm does it first.)

Simumodder [PS]: Hp: 98/100.
JOEbob [PS - Player]: Hp: 10/10. Portal Armor [A]: 2/5 charges. Fire Orb [A]: Flare: 2/2
Terror Pig [PS][BOSS]: Hp: 45500/150000. It's Hamnight!: 2/4. Burning 7 rounds.
Fire Demons x2 [PS]: Hp: 25000/25000.
Ninjaneer [AS - jondanger]: Hp: 2000/25000. Skip a Bunch of Steps: 3/3. Burning 3 rounds.
Level 2 Sentry [AS - jondanger]: Hp: 500/4000. Burning 3 round.
Free Modeled Mecha [AS - Redstone]: Hp: 7500/25000. Burning 3 round.
Maria the Mayor / umbralAggressor [AS - Consumer] Hp: 3/5. Shroud: 1/3. Thamiel's Retribution: 1/4. Constructed: 1/5. Mary the Mayor: 1/10.  Burning 3 rounds.
Lonnor, Prince of the Lonnies [AS - TrickleJest]: Hp: 19500/30000. Burning 3 rounds.
Underknight [AS - Sp33d0n]: Hp: 14500/25000. Blackened Finale: 1/3. Light of Faith: 1/5. Burning 3 rounds.
Consumer [AS - Player] Hp: 10/10. Golden Sun [A]: 0/5 Ammo. And Then The Sphere Cracked: 1/7. Flesh Interfacing: 1/7.

”Players”

Tricklejest [AS]: Level 2: 32500/35000 XP
Combat Specials: Heroism, Lv: Basic, Advanced
ConsumerOfAll [AS]: Level 1: 26500/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Megacorprruption, Lv: Basic
Hezetor [AS]: Level 1: 21000/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Atom Smasher, Lv: Basic
Jondanger23 [AS]: Level 1: 19500/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Sub-Terranean, Lv: Basic
Sp33d0n [AS]: Level 1: 20500/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Atramentum Maledictus, Lv: Basic
micbs [AS]: Level 1: 24000/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Political Discourse, Lv: Basic
engie [AS]: Level 1: 16000/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Corpse Maker, Lv: Basic
Urus [AS]: Level 1: 6500/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Snake In My Boot, Lv: Basic
Battlefury [AS]: Level 1: 11000/30000 XP
Combat Specials: WOOF, Lv: Basic
Redstonetam15 [AS]: Level 1: 500/30000 XP
Combat Specials: Free Model Mason, Lv: Basic
Toast [AS]: Level 0: 18000/25000 XP
Cyanogynist [AS]: Level 0: 20000/25000 XP
Talist [AS]: Level 0: 22500/25000 XP
CobaltShade [AS]: Level 0: 6000/25000 XP
Emerald_Mann [AS]: Level 0: 13000/25000 XP
JOEbob [PS]: Level 3: 1500/40000 XP
Combat Specials: Portaltech, Lv: Basic, Advanced. Infernal Wrath, Lv: Basic
[spoiler=AFK]
Twinbuilder [AS]: Level 0: 2000/25000 XP
Nikitaw99 [AS]: Level 0: 4000/25000 XP

[/spoiler]

Originally posted on 2017-01-06 17:07:00

--------------------
Once upon a time there was a story...
PMEmail
^
Battlefury
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
Quote

Archangel Micheal
Group: Members
Posts: 1300
Joined: 11-August 18
Age: N/A
Location: New Winchester
Status: N/A



I make the Terror Pig trip and fall into a pit of Hydrogen-Cyanide.

7/10
7/10

Originally posted on 2017-01-06 18:54:00

--------------------
he he
PMEmail
^
Jondanger23
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
Quote

some guy
Group: Members
Posts: 879
Joined: 11-August 18
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Status: N/A



I do a little festive jig. This makes a huge ball of water fall on the AS side.

The Ninjaneer repairs the sentry again, which fires at the Terror Pig.

Originally posted on 2017-01-06 20:01:00

--------------------
[small]small[/small] [big]big[/big]
PMEmail
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GUEST_USER
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
Quote

Player
Group: Members
Posts: 93
Joined: 11-August 18
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Status: N/A



A friendly warlock enters the field.
'phew, just in time for my grand entrance, this is going to be great!
and you guys made a hellscape here, i feel at home already!

Wait, what!?
it's not here yet!?

but now people won't like me ;-;

anyways sorry i don't have a servant and a fancy cape and such.
i'll try to introduce myself anyway:
Hi I'm Fannar and i want to make some friends here, but dont trust me too much, i can be quite mischievious http://b3.ifrm.com/static/emo/2.png
i don't know what team to choose, the members all seem so nice. ill go neutral for now.

so ye i usually don't attack things but it seems i have to now, plus this is a simulation so none of this is real, right?
gee wiz, i sure hope i don't actually hurt anyone.

anyway i don't really wanna attack someone now, so i'm just gonna have some fun.'
i walk up to the fire demons with three magically enchanted supersoaker, they shhot much farther and shoot out extra good water, holy water in fact. i give two of the super soakers to the demons, which of course are fire proof. it wouldn't be fair if they couldn't use their water pistols, would it. i spray holy water on the fire demons but they don't seem to be playing along, in fact they don't seem to enjoy it at all. when i notice this i stop. 'sorry bout that, guys. see ya next time!'

i start waiting for my grand entrance to arive
fancy cape 1/5
cool servant friend 1/5

i start giving presents +1 to trickle

Originally posted on 2017-01-06 20:25:00
PMEmail
^
ConsumerOfAll
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
Quote

GLORIOUS LEADER
Group: Members
Posts: 1202
Joined: 11-August 18
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Status: N/A



Alicia takes out a bucket of water, before hitting the ground. Suddenly, the temperature amount can go lower than -273C. Suddenly, the temperature amount in the bucket of water does go lower than -273C, hitting the low millions. The bucket of water suddenly becomes the Ocean in the Bucket, and Alicia throws the ocean inside of the Bucket at Maria.

The bucket is full of LSD, whilst Maria inexplicably (read, blame Thamiel) becomes immune to cold and the divine wonders of LSD. The water is then cursed with healing properties from the devil, mixed in with sheer edge, and the water splashes over Maria, healing her and weakening the effect of the burn.

Holy, Holy, Holy, Part Deux [4/10]
Worms But One Is Crawling Up My Skin [2/10]
+1 Spoon


Originally posted on 2017-01-06 20:30:00

--------------------
questo mondo non cambia, nemmeno se vuoi
questa gente che parla, che parla di noi
per tutta questa rabbia, per questi sogni in gabbia
se sto vivendo un dramma, sarà il mio momento
prima o poi, prima o poi
PMEmail
^
JOEbob
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
Quote

Ancestor
Group: Members
Posts: 1777
Joined: 11-August 18
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Status: N/A



yeah, i just kept adding more and more to it whenever i had some free time: the pourpos was mostly keeping it the same, but some of it was an attempt to stop the unholy robots from burning to death every time they spawn.
like, 3 paragraphs or so.
7/10 blackmist
3/5 sir bob
(flare should be ready, portal armor should have 2/5 charges i think)
+1 arcanecynic
"Hi "fannar". i'm terrible with names, so is it ok if i call you AC? you remind me of someone."
"anyway, i made that hellscape and everyone else just tried to destroy it, sooooo Pleasejoinmepleasejoinmeplease."
"if you join me, we get automatic +3-5 every turn, and we can +1 each other twice, so its like +5-7's!(note: only sometimes)"
"(i want to be friends)"

now then, actions:
Spoiler Alert

i use Infernal Wrath (basic) on maria, then blink over to the ninjaneer, "you should have died the first time."
i raise my hand, and a blue orb appears.
"now, i never did summon this, but i think i'll use it anyway"
i grab the blue orb, which melds into a pair of gloves immediatly. then i raise my hand, and the "holy" water "fannar" was shooting at the demons redirects itself in midair, forming a small orb, somehow compressed. the orb darkens, tinting ever so slightly purple, and i throw it forward, landing a direct hit on the 'neer, and it freezes, a cold blue. i embed the orb into his forehead(-analoug?).

i close my hand into a fist.
the orb shrinks.
i open my hand.
the orb erupts into icey spikes, sharp and strong, sticking the ninjaneer in place, and i raise my hand, lifting the 'neer. the glove melds into a steel cannon, which i point at the 'neer, and fires, waves and ripples of power from the edges of the beam.
this should do it.
now to deal with their attempts to cool the world. the red orb replaces the cannon, and i catch it.
infernal fire burns around it, and some darkened light glistens off the surface of the orb, as it melds into a GiANT LAZOR CANNON OF FIRE.
now, obviously this cannon needs some time to charge, and I'll have to rebuild the tourture-sphere afterwards, but who cares? (not me)
while the cannon charges, I take out a pickaxe, then start carresing it. yes, carresing it, that makes perfect sense. it also creates a giant shield of rocks around the cannon so nobody stops it in this charge-up phase

sadly, underknight sees me carresing it, so they has to die. oh well. i run forward, and punch them in the face. a crowd of people shows up and starts yelling "how dare you hit a gurl!!1!", mistaking the lack of clarified gender, and tries to kill me. however, 'knight is between them and me, so they hit it all the time while i masterfully dodge gunshots, arrows, and grenades. after ~197 seconds of dodgeing bullets and punching people, one of them throws a truck, so i walk through a portal (not using a charge of the armor), and then walk back after it lands, see 'knight is still alive, and run forward, dodgeing another truck from the mobs remains, and kick them in the back, punch it hard, and take out a penguin.
the penguin is so adorable that 'knight starts to hug and cuddle it, kissing it and saying they will love it forever and stuff, but then i take out an orb of penguinium, and summon 10373648 penguins. it is then hit by all of them learning to fly using the dubstep drive from directly beneath her, with the steam launcher and the superhero body, and the last one uses sonic bullet thing and omega penguin while wearing the omega brick. the omega bricks 666 raw sex appeal makes them somehow fall in love, and it grabs the penguin as it begins its assent. sadly, all the midair obstacles batter it badly, and when the brick and the penguin hit the moon, it shatters.
they is teleported to the other side of the planet, and all the parts of the moon land directly on top of her. having hopefully dealt a bunch of damage, i then turn my attention to the cannon, which is almost ready.
i dispell a very small part of the barrier, keep an eye out for anything that could stop it, and fire the cannon, which vaporises all the water on that side of the field with shear heat, and then strikes the underknight, who "randomly" got thrown in front of it, and absorbs the rest of the beam. good, now i just have to set everything on fire again!

the cannon turns back into a wand, but the leftover power is nearly too much for it, and i imediatly cast "Helscapeify VI" with it, which is a totaly real spell, and turns a 6666 meter area around the user into a hellscape. that is, lava rivers, skeletal trees, tourtured souls, sharp floor, you know, the works. [will add more latter maybe]


Originally posted on 2017-01-07 07:34:00
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Featherfall
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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I cast Acceleration Glyph on the Terror Pig, considerably reducing its burn duration but dealing heavy damage based on the stacks lost.
--Charges--
Tap Frek: 3/10
Frap Tek: 3/10

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 07:55:00

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This signature is a 3/3 green Elk creature with no abilities.
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engie
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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Primary weapon: X-Corpse Shooter
Secondary weapon: Corpse Piercer
Tertiary weapon: NA
Armor: NA


The Fairview Survivor seems concerned about all the fire, although why so when she hasn't even summoned anything and appears to not be harmed by it seems unclear... She closes her eyes shut tight, feeling fire on her body, fire on her weaponry, fire fire fire. She seems to know of something that could happen that is, apparently to her, not a very good situation.

"Burning? No no no, this is bad... I don't want to end up like them..."

Her body seems to be shifting a little as if trying to... change...

She does her best to push past it for the time being, loading a rifle round into the Corpse Piercer, then taking careful aim at one of the Fire Demons, focusing for a moment, and firing once. This time, it seems the rifle kicked back a little harder than she intended, part of the bony structure of the rifle butt clobbering her in the face and managing to draw blood. Abnormally dark and congealed blood. Something seems biologically strange about the Survivor, especially when the flames start to burn more strongly on her body and yet she doesn't seem to be hurt by it.

Aggro Spike: 1/4
Temporary Mutation: 1/5

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 08:04:00

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"Their story has concluded for now. Currently, you follow mine."
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Hezetor
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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.


-------

+1 to Trickle
9/10 +1 from Speed
5/10

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 11:26:00

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...



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Emerald_Mann
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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AI: 8/10
Virus: 7/10
I start randomly equipping armor until I have over 100% fire resistance to heal from burning

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 11:31:00
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Sp33d0n
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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/is placeholder

+1 to Hez

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 11:32:00

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They say that there's no rest for the wicked, until they close their eyes for good.

As someone wicked, fundamentally, I disagree. One may always repent. I may have done terrible things in the past. That's why I help this coward now.
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Hezetor
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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Hezetor uses the power of his new found 10 post charge to give himself a regeneration of 1 HP per turn.



+1 to Trickle
10/10 Expended
7/10 + 1 from Speed

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 15:16:00

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TrickleJest
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:42 PM
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[b]
[color=RED]Incompetent GM
[/color]
[/b]
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Joined: 11-August 18
Age: N/A
Location: In Me Mom's Car (Dead memes for the win)
Status: N/A



I CAN'T GO A SINGLE TURN WITHOUT GETTING THESE GODDAMN CHARGES!
...

Gates of Alternia - 10/10 [+1 from Hezetor, Speed].

"Oh for crying out loud."

Lonnor heals Maria the Mayor.
TinCube has fallen.
Trickle collects his soul and puts it in a jar.
Shush. This isn't Undertale. His soul doesn't go away. SHHHH! DON'T QUESTION IT!

Trickle holds a moment of silence for a fallen ally.
And then-...
A meteor falls from the sky, carrying something gray, with two horns and a zodiac sign on their shirt.
It can't be!
It's none other than SHITTY HOMESTUCK TROLL OC!

"What the fu-?!"

The OC runs full speed at Terror Pig, stabbing him with its pointy (and shitty) horns. Terror Pig kills the OC, and some of its pink glistering blood falls on his hand.
As the OCs last words, it utters - "IT'S POISONOUS..."
The Pig then doesn't know what to do, as it just has shitty OC poison blood on him. Since his intelligence doesn't differ much from a normal pig, he eats his very own hand, dealing damage to him.
He then realizes that eating his own hand speeds up the process of the poison killing him.
Shit.

Trickle also greets Fannar and thanks him for the +1.



CHARGES
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/placeholder - 7/10 [+1 from Hezetor, Redstone, Consomme, Joe, Arcane].
Rise of the Charges - 1/10.
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+1 to Battlefury.
QUE IS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 15:35:00

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My DTG Spin-Off
[small][small][big][big]WARNING[/big][/big][/small][/small]: It's sorta based on Homestuck, albeit only a bit. It's also not held on these forums, so you might have to make an account if you wish to join, but keep in mind that I appreciate every single person who joins.
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JOEbob
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:43 PM
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8/10 blackmist
10/10 sir bob the +5 piono said i get Using!
(next charge: Stefen 1/10)
+1 arcanecynic
I Summon Sir Bob.
i don't know how much HP to give him;
he should either multiply the effect of artifacts he wears or have an effect similar to my portal armor, if its multiply the effects i give him my artifacts.
no offensive abilitys.
so in summery:
0 attack
? hp, decent?
buffs artifacts OR can portal things
Useless at this time.
balance as nessasery, but if there is anything TOO wrong/ different, like him not geting portals in any way or something, please tell me and suggest balancing.


i run over to consumer and tie them up, throw them off a mountain, hit them with a beam of fire, and steal their face.


Originally posted on 2017-01-07 16:02:00
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GUEST_USER
 Posted: Aug 11 2018, 07:43 PM
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'thank you for the present, joebob, but i'm really just called fannar not ac. I mean if you really wanted it you could, i guess. also, i have to decline your offer, because the people on the other team seem really nice too! http://b3.ifrm.com/static/emo/1.png
i will give you a gift back tho (i +1 joe)'

fannar uses his turn to give everyone one of those fancy pencils you always got when it was someones birthday in primary schools, if that is a thing in other countries that is. Unfortunately, almost everyone throws them away immediately. most of the pencils land on the fire demons.

'C'mon, you guys that isn't nice, what did the fire demons ever do to you?'

3/5 cool servant friend
3/5 fancy cape

Originally posted on 2017-01-07 16:50:00
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