I run to M9, Use TemsTwo, Clones spawn at L10 and M10 and I invest 3 SP on 1 INT.

Originally posted on 2016-09-05 18:35:00

@Pricey: TemsFour has been replaced with TemsTwo, which works differently. Most noticeably, the clone is stronger but there's only one clone.

@Gladius: Recall Potion, away! I'd rather that this particular fight be had with the people who can't die forever...

Originally posted on 2016-09-05 18:50:00

Pi goes to Near The Summit and attempts to harvest some Cinder Fruit.

Originally posted on 2016-09-05 21:21:00

~INFORMATION OBTAINED~

A missile is landing at (K9). It is a Crater Type.

(Message 2)

BATTLE OPINIONS:

• We obviously aren't supposed to engage this thing in combat yet, or at all because core.
• Current Objectives (in order): Break door, escape battle, obtain souls, figure out how to beat fight.
• The Gate won't fall until Charitomb is off. It doesn't say anything about killing him, so we need to figure that one out.
• G E T R E A D Y F O R A Y A Z E .

I am taking this shiny ore! I'm taking it!

However, of course, Lyra is not getting cut up in that, and is still trying to get the shiny gold ore by taking out...an entire paint bucket. I don't even know where she got that from, and I am not to question it. Either way, she continues on creating a path by...literally drawing one in the lava to make a path. And it spells out "LYRA WAS HERE". It's...serviceable. I guess. Mission accomplished?

Originally posted on 2016-09-05 23:58:00

"!"

The Operative near-immediately dashes off to the battle on top of Nightmare Mountain, climbing The Ascend in what would be record time if it weren't for teleportation, passing through the "near" region without so much as a pause to look at the scenery, through the one-way barrier, and into the fight, spawning in at G11. Immediately, he turns to look at Chairitomb, almost dismissively seems to roll his eyes at it, focusing on Gladius instead.

"Jesus christ, Chloe, don't just stand there! Get to safety! Try using the Recall Potion - if that doesn't work, I'd recommend heading to either G10 or M10, myself... They're out of the way of splash missiles, and not stuck in the row missile area of effect. I have the distinct feeling most of the team are going to head to the right, so there'd be a higher density of people over there to help out, but if you head for the left, well... Then, you've got me of all people to rely on, for better or worse."

[small]"Probably worse though since I don't have Taunt and thus suck at drawing aggro"[/small]

He then rockets up to 4D, activating Counter for the additional dodge chance. The counterattacking is just a neat little bonus at this point.

Originally posted on 2016-09-06 00:20:00

Siria opens the Supply Drop, then moves to Near The Summit and slaughters a bunch of the Glitch Snow Golems, and then enters the battle at the Final Gate, spawning at M11 and moving to Q8. She shoots Blatantly The Right Door and then retreats to P9.

Originally posted on 2016-09-06 00:58:00

I forge 10 iron buckets and use them to scoop up as much lava as possible.

Originally posted on 2016-09-06 01:56:00

I take the Hot Dog, and eat it shove it inside an upgrade valve, where magical song items shall be placed to allow the power of their Songs to shine across the mindscape. This Hot Dog shall to allow me to play Dogsong, the Song of Dog. I don't even know what Dogsong would do, but what could go wrong? Probably something like people becoming dogs upon death or annoying enemies to death.
If I can, I move north.


Yes, I am insane.

Originally posted on 2016-09-06 02:54:00

=TURN ONE-HUNDRED AND FIFTY-FIVE=

@Toast: ...I actually decided against the +MP per INT level for whatever reason. Not sure why it's still in the patch notes, though. Huh. Should I go through with this part of the update?

Toast expends 5 Smooth Round Stones, 4 Titanium Bars, a Green Sap Orb, a piece of Hallowed Bark, 8 Glass Shards, a pair of Sunglasses, and 2 Other Grave Fragments to add two new Forms to the Jadesaw! Toast then flings a few skillpoints around, upgrading her STR by 3 by dropping her MMP by 3 and MHP by 6. This is complemented by swapping Revive for Counter. Toast then swings at the outhouse with a whir'd chainsaw, sundering metal as the whirring blades cleave through the outhouse! However, just slashing it won't do much; the Outhouse is still standing. Roxxanne then calls Chaos a mean jerkface, and such.

cc: oh no! (t)ables are s(t)upid!?
cc: ...i a©(t)ually dropped (t)ableman©y re©en(t)ly.
cc: why manipula(t)e (t)ables when you ©an manipula(t)e... any(t)hing else?
cc: (i ©an s(t)ill do i(t), though.)
cc: i also lack proper s(t)a(t)s. so "oh no -2 in(t) wha(t) a disas(t)er gorilla you roxxanne"

Redstone then loots the crops from the garden, and re-plants what he can. This ends up in the inventory obtaining x6 Medical Herbs, and x25 Silkweed. Redstone also picks up a Creepy Doll, then uses ancient eldritch magics to teleport inside the house somehow. He then proceeds to write a message on the floor, stating that he is "20% more rational than everyone else." Chaos takes offense to this statement. Redstone then kicks down the door of the dollhouse from the inside. Suddenly, the puppet you picked up reveals a rather sharp of claws concealed in it's hands, and starts ripping away at your skin! The other puppets suddenly animate, and join in too, dealing (22-6) damage to you before you shake them off! It looks like they're just content with keeping Redstone pinned down here; attacking them now would probably cause a normal battle.

HealerX then swaps to the Ubercannon, and signs up to the Barrage Newsletter. Speaking of that, I'll make a list of who's in that, at the bottom of this post. Teag then attempts to exterminate the Dog Residue, but Battlefury promptly denies him with magiks! This also saves Teag's life, as the Dog Residue surely would've flung Teag into the lava. Numbersoup then heads to the Escape Pod, and takes the things IN it. x2 Seats, x2 Emergency Rations, x2 Waterdrank™, and a Creepy Puppet obtained!

...you decide to leave the puppet in the escape pod. You know what's happening to Redstone back there. Gladius is then commanded to drink a Recall Potion, which she happily does.

ga: Hey, this actually tastes pretty goo-

With a pulse of turquoise light, Gladius is whisked away to the MW Anti. She'll stay there until given further orders. Pi then heads to the area Near The Summit, and grabs some Cinder Fruit; 3 of them. They're added to the inventory. Lyra then paints a rather dangerous "lyra was here" path across the lava, bridging it completely. Siria then drops a couple of Glitch Snow Golems with a few well-placed shots at that zone Near The Summit. She then loots 7 Pumpkins and 48 Snowballs from the corpses. Insert then expends 30 Iron Ingots to forge 10 Iron Buckets, and ends up creating 10 Lava Buckets by scooping some lava. Nomble then shoves the Hot Dog into his Tuba, adding the Song of Dogs to his Tuba. I'm then unsure about how North you want to go, so you simply move to The Ascent. (You can move infinite areas in a zone per turn. You can also move and attack when you spawn in a fight.)

Roxxanne then runs to the Final Gate, along with Jon, Darkside, The Operative, and Siria.

=BATTLE: FINAL GATE, TURN ONE=
A few of your members are poisoned and burned; make sure they don't die! Be sure to control the Souldier population; they'll keep on spawning in and just make your life really fun in general.

Missiles were fired!
5 PM's sent out!

THE NIGHTMARE MOUNTAIN BARRAGE NEWSLETTER:
These players will receive PM's about incoming missiles. Maybe.
Tazz / Roxxanne
Engie / The Operative
Crystalcat / Siria
Insert
Darkside
PitTheAngel / Lyra
Toast
ConsumerOfAll / Oriko
Battlefury / Lord of All Dogs, Forever, Period
Cyan / Healerbot Xenogenesis

Is there an error on this list? Well, you should probably tell me. Sign-ups will be present throughout the fight.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 01:04:00

I chug the awesome sauce, and promptly sprint to k9

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 02:05:00

I'm sorry, puppets! I don't have true control over my actions! There's some kid who's controlling me and thought I was inside the house because there's no visuals really!

Redstone continues to spit out 4th wall breaking nonsense. If they don't stop, he attempts to shake them offas hard as he can normally. If that doesn't work, he rolls back to the Base for some help. If he can't move...

I honestly don't care at all if he gets Deathdazed. He's 20% rationality, 60% total idiot, and 20% OP Alchemies that he doesn't have.

Hey!

Fine.

I honestly don't care at all if he gets Deathdazed. He's 20% rationality, 60% total idiot, and 20% OP Alchemies that he doesn't have.

He uses the eldritch powers of the Horrertorrors because hell, he was a Derse Dreamer in his session stands idle.


Originally posted on 2016-09-07 02:54:00

>HealerX: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
"HELL'S AGONY!"

>HealerX: Move to L10.
"Every bi+ of AC coun+s."

>HealerX: Shoot yourself, restoring most of your HP.
"DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA!"

>HealerX: End turn.
"OU+ OF MOVES. NOW EN+ERING INAC+IVI+Y."

>Cyan: BROADCAST MESSAGE 1.
"Crater Missiles are falling at (E4) and (G8)." Move away from E4 and G8. Like 2 spaces away. If any message points out that I'm in any way wrong, follow the correction.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 03:20:00

No PM here.

Toast flies over Redstone and fixes the door with 1 Wooden Plank and 1 Iron Ingot. If that doesn't pacify the puppets...
Eh.

We can save Redstone later.
:V

Toast then enters the fight at M11, before moving to M6.
Please keep hands and feet inside the vehicle during the ride.

She uses Shifting Sands on DarkSide, before revving up with Earth. She then retreats to Q9.
I suggest giving that door a nudge with your chair.

As it whirs, the Jadesaw's color becomes one shade lighter, which is intermingled with earthy browns and dark oranges. The teeth glow a bright green as they spin, creating an odd, neon band around the chainsaw. Veins of green energy fan out from Toast's crystals, which are now shining brighter than ever.

@Ire, don't forget to update my move. I have 8 AGI from the Drone Dome. As for the INT changes, I'll survive.
(unless i don't and die for some reason)

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 03:50:00

"cc: you mus(t) be able (t)o read (t)hese. s(t)upid game me©hani©s.
cc: good (t)hing i ©an make (t)hese ©ommands as dumb as possible
cc: have fun!

In Message 3, the missile that is falling is actually a Column missile.
(Message 5)"

Alright, that's out there.

@Redstone: You said yourself that you do not have consistent access to your laptop on non-weekend days, so unless that changed (and honestly even if it did) let us not complicate the already-complicated PM arrays further. The less variables, the better.

I move to Q3 and continue shooting the Right door down. Super Greed recalls he exists and moves to K9.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 04:30:00

I don't wanna take the last slot of my non-standard 25 posts a page count, but because battle, I should mention that I have not received a PM.

Alright, now that I can reach the path, I can...
Redstone... What did you do to that poor door? You could have waited and asked to be let in!
Hang on, I'm going to fix your incredible mistake...

Lyra, in an attempt to solve the new problem of "Redstone, you're an idiot, why did you break down the door", rushes into the area right outside the house. Since she hasn't vandalized anything or shown any intent to harm (by sheathing her brush), the puppets now should have no motive to attack, as she is technically a third-party.

Using eight Iron Bars, she shreds them and paints them a helpful shade of glued to create an Iron Door Frame, combining it with the Sliding Steel Door by simply attaching it to the door frame to create the Metal Door. It's a door that's made of metal, and simple to explain.

Lyra then uses the created door to replace the now totally-dead wooden door and slots it in. Since the old frame was ruined along with the door when Redstone kicked it down, it doesn't take long to completely fit it in. She then paints several colored circles on the door and uses the back side of the Techpiece Wanted Poster (painting the front side to cover her tracks) to write a message to the unfortunate homeowner. It reads as follows;

[color=#CC99FF]"Dear [Your Name Here],
Some idiot who got attacked by your guard puppets thought it would be a brilliant idea to kick down the door instead of more conventional methods, like windows. And lockpicks. And waiting for you to come back. Either way, it was totally ruined, along with the frame. So I replaced it for you with a much sturdier steel one, so it doesn't happen again (hopefully). The door opens when you poke the colored circles I painted on it in the order of "Green, Red, Blue, White".
-Lyra"

[color=#3333CC]This entire sequence of events ends with Lyra deciding not to head inside the door to respect the owner's privacy and because the fact she was kind enough to replace the door for her already gave her MAD REPUTATION POINTS with the puppets for replacing the door the vandal broke down.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 04:44:00

"Whoever's got Message 1, I've got a correction to make! The second crater missile is actually falling at O9!"

because it totally makes in-character sense to yell things that nobody else knows about right

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 04:52:00

"cc: you mus(t) be able (t)o read (t)hese. s(t)upid game me©hani©s.
cc: good (t)hing i ©an make (t)hese ©ommands as dumb as possible
cc: have fun!

A Row Missile is falling at (J8).
Do note that these don’t give a damn about walls and the like.
(Message 4)"

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 06:54:00

I head north and kill the snow golems.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 14:47:00

I equip the cane and move to the Final Gate.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 17:50:00

ALERT!

A Row Column Missile is falling at (P4).
(Message 3)

"Thanks, Toast!"

I move to (O3) and Night Meld for 50% on the door.

Originally posted on 2016-09-07 18:27:00