Why am I doing this? I know nothing (well, next to nothing) about this series, why am I playing a fangame about it?
...Well, nowhere to go but New Game.
GAME: Before we get started, you need to create your character!
Wait, what? Self-Inserts?

Umm...best choice here is blue, so i'll pick that...

No, but for the sake of this thing let's pretend it is. [CHEAP JOKES COUNTER: 1]
GAME: What is your name?
(Default name is Cylan)
Oh, I get it! It's a pun! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
*names character Pit*

Okay, straight in. This is a bedroom. Time to do the natural thing and interact anything in sight.
(NOTHING IS INTERACTABLE)
Okay, now to go downstairs because story I guess.

There's a bit of a frame drop, but I don't think any of you care. Either way, let's talk to this person.
Dad: Finally decided to come out of your room, eh? (actual text)
Oooooooh, dialouge options! That's always fun!
*Selects "Slept In, Sorry"*
Dad: Don't worry, i'm just joking with ya!
Of course. Thanks, dad.
Dad: Anyway, I need ya to get some food from the store in town. Watch yourself, people say there has been some Grimm hangin' around.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT A GRIMM IS. Are they the antagonists? Whatever. Either way, other dialouge options.
AU!Pit: I'll be careful.
Dad: Good. See ya when you get back.
Good. Controls are back, time to actually do exploration.

Other part of house for completion's sake. Either way, time to step outside and see the world!

*Title of area is "Somewhere in Patch"*
...oh no. LET'S MOVE ON.

Wait, I should probably check my inventory for stuff.

...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH. Quickly, put Dual Pistol Katanas into DTG: Chaos! WE NEED MORE STUPID AWESOME!
*Nothing in inventory*
Well, let's just keep walking.
*42 Seconds Later*

Look at this town. It's a beautiful town.

Oh hey look NPC dialouge. Cool. Fun. Okay.
*chose first option*
Old Man: Nice to see such good kids in this town. Take care now!

Just more town, nothing else to see.

Oh look, a building made of glass! I bet that's important!
*immediately walks in*

Yep, found the store. Well, that wasn't hard. Now to talk to the NPC and complete our first quest. Maybe.
Storekeeper: Hi! What can I help you with?
Pit: Just some basic food items.
Storekeeper: Alright, that'll be 20 Lien.
*I got food.*
Storekeeper: See you again!
Yay, now we can advance the plot!

Don't mind me, just more town showing.

No really, have some more.
*WALKING IS FUN RIGHT*

Oh hi dad, how's it going?
Dad: Great, you got the food! But, I need you to go to the lake for a perimeter check. Just to be safe.
Well this doesn't look like a way the plot is going to introduce me to the combat sequences at ALL.
Pit: Alright.
Dad: Thanks. Stay safe.
And now to lake.

This is where you will find lake. And we enter to see...

Well, this. It's this. I'll admit I played the demo of this, and that this is just an alpha, and I actually managed to avoid triggering
a neccesary event flag for several minutes. Seriously.

All I needed to do in order to find this out was just to climb this, too. I guess this is going to be fixed soon. (developer, if you're reading this, roadblocks are your friend)

Yes, I also have eyes.
GAME: He seems to be talking to himself.
Cloaked Person: ...plenty... underground...
Cloaked Person: ...people... move...
Cloaked Person: ...wall...
Yes, is this going to be on the test?
GAME: Who was he? What did he want?
First, i'm pretty sure the first sentence is grammatically incorrect, and second, how am I supposed to know?
GAME: There doesn't seem to be any Grimm here. You should tell your father what you saw.
Whatever. More plot advancement for me.
*YALALALALA STAGE*

And before I get 15 PMs about this, there's nothing behind the house.
Ded: Well, Anything?
Pit: There was this guy...
Ded: Huh? What're you talking abou-
*explosion sound effect*
Ded: What was that?! (AN EXPLOSION!) You go check the town, I will make sure the house is safe!
Okay then.

What? Why did nothing cha-

...I said nothing.
*INCREDIBLY SLOW FRAMERATE*
The Old Man From Before: Oh! You need to get out of here kid!
Pit: What's going on?!
The Old Man From Before: Damn, Grimm! That's what! Now, run!
Now it's getting edgy. Serious!
The Old Man From Before: I called Beacon, and they're sending hunters.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT ANY OF THIS STUFF IS CAN SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN
The Old Man From Before: But, I don't think they will make it in time! We need somewhere to hide!
Pit: Head to my place.
Old Man Jenkins: What? Oh, yes! Your place is out of town!
CONVENIENT PLOT POINT THAT WAS NEVER ESTABLISHED!
Old Man Jenkins: But, what about the townsfolk?
Pit: I'll make sure they get there!
Old Man: Ok, please be careful!
OBJECTIVE: Save the townspeople! (read: talk to everyone possible)

WEGOTTADOTHISWEGOTTADOTHISWEGOTTADOTHIS
Probably Young Girl: Why is everything on fire?!
Pit: Go to my house!
One, how would people know the location to [PLAYER CHARACTER]'s house?
Two, that wasn't an answer to her question.

ERMAHGERDERMAHGERDERMAHGERD
Old Lady: Where is my husband? Is he alright?
Pit: Go to my house!
Once again, that's not an answer.

RANDOM ENCOUNTER OH NO-
(Sadly, it's real time, so I can't explain it that well. You have options and more bars then a reader would want to pay attention.
I beat it down though.)

Well, at least we have dialouge.
*Collects 70L from fight*
From a regular enemy? One regular enemy? Something tells me the economy is going to be high.

EXCELSIOR!EXCELSIOR!EXCELSIOR!
Girl Older then the Other Girl: The Grimm are attacking!
Pit: Come to my house.
Girl: Alright!

HOWMANYNPCSDOINEEDTOSAVEANYWAY (Seven. Seven NPCs.)
Shopkeeper: My store!
Pit: Go to my house!
Shopkeeper: It's safe there? Ok then.

Hey look another fight. Well, let's do another one.

woo we leveled up
*Collects only 20L*
Aw, come on. The previous one gave me 70, why such a big difference?
(FIGHT SCENE EDITED OUT FOR REDUNDENCY. 20 MORE L)

ITHINKTHISISTHELASTNPCGOOD
Probably a Lumberjack: I'd be able to take 'em, if not for my arm...
Pit: Go to my house!
Probably a Lumberjack: Good luck!
(THERE WAS STILL MORE. HAD TO FIGHT 4 RATS. GOT 40 MORE L AND A POTION)

WHENWILLITEVEREEEEEEEEEEEND
(OF COURSE I'M INTERRUPTED BY MORE RATS JUST AS I'M ABOUT TO TALK. +20L)
What's His Face: The Grimm have never attacked before! Why is this happening!?
Because Politics.
Pit: Go to my house!
What's His Face: You don't have to tell me twice!

FINALLY. There were actual clapping noises, too. I literally heard slow clapping. Nice touch. (No really, the game had noises)
Some Important Offscreen Character: Well done.

HELLO. I TAKE IT THAT ALL THREE OF YOU ARE IMPORTANT CHARACTERS. SPEAK SO I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT OF IMPORTANT CHARACTERS YOU ARE.
White Hair Man: Not only did you evacuate everyone safely, but you were able to fend of the Grimm as well.
You misspelled "off" there, developer. Whoops.
White Hair Man: Tell me, where did you learn to fight like that?
Is this going to effect the outcome of the game? Probably not, but just in case...
*selects "I taught myself"*
White Hair Man: Without a mentor? Very impressive.
Yellow Haired Woman: We will do damage control, and take out any remaining Grimm.
That sentence seems slightly bumpy. But eh.
White Hair Man: Thank you. Do you know who I am?
*Options are "Professor Ozpin", "The Headmaster of Beacon", and "I have no clue"*
Thank. Now I have context. It's not much, but it helps.
*chooses "Professor Ozpin"*
Ozpin: So you have heard of me. Nice to meet you, by the way.
NO I HAVEN'T I ONLY SELECTED THIS FOR CONTEXT
Ozpin: Have you ever thought about becoming a Hunter?
Okay, Hunters and Beacon have a relationship. Good. I AM LEARN.
*accidentally selected "Yes, in my dreams"*
Ozpin: Well, maybe it doesn't have to be a dream. (just realized red hair didn't speak at all)
(BLACK SCREEN TRANSITION AND OPENING CREDITS LATER)
GAME: Your father's words ring in your head.
Ded: My kid, a Hunter... I couldn't be more proud of you.
I STILL DON'T GET IT
Ded: Don't worry 'bout me. I'll be fine, I gotta help rebuild the town!
Ded: Now, go! Be the best Pokemon Trainer Hunter there ever was! (I took some creative liberties here)
I'm Assuming Somebody: Worrying about home?

And we are in vehicle. Good. You can read that one text.
Ozpin: I suppose you have questions?
YES.
*selects "Why Me?"*
Ozpin: Why you? You mean for a Hunter? It's simple.
Ozpin: But, you'll see soon enough.
THANKS FOR ANSWERING ME YOU JERK
*selects "Where are we going?"
Ozpin: We are going to Signal.
GET IT? BEACON? SIGNAL? (dear gods, i'm becoming cloud)
Ozpin: We will drop you off at a hotel, you'll spend the night, then you can board the airship to Beacon with the other students.
That sentence feels a bit too long in my stupid opinion.
*I already know why they came, so selects "I'm good."*
Ozpin: Great, we should be arriving shortly.
Good, then i'll save and get back to this at a later date.
Gold Hair Woman: Sir, I have just received the information.
Dave can't come to the christmas party.
Ozpin: What is it?
Did you not just hear me?
Gold Hair Woman: It's Torchwick.
WHO?
*suddenly intense muzak*
Ozpin: Hmm? Where?
Gold Hair Woman: A dust shop not far from here.
Not going to question it yet...

...This game's better with Kinect. (I swear i didn't plan that, I ask that question and 45 seconds later it provides the answer)
*selects "Who's Torchwick?" because I want to know too*
Ozpin: A dangerous criminal wanted for multiple robberies and acts of terrorism.
Good. Context is always good.
GHW: Hang on. Reports say someone is trying to detain him.
AND NOW TO FIND A MAIN CHARACTER, RIGHT?
Ozpin: Who?
A MAIN CHARACTER.
GHW: A...Teenage girl?
Remove the capital T, that shouldn't be there. And see? It really IS a main character!
Ozpin: Interesting.
GHW: We're here.

Good, more scenery. That car was cramped anyway.
Someone: On the rooftop, [I missed this part]
GHW: I'm going!
*Only options are "So am I!" and "Not alone, you're not."*
And that's a surefire sign of main character.
*It doesn't matter, so selects "So am I!"*
GHW: No! You stay he-
Ozpin: Glynda.
Finally, another name! That's...three people we know a name for? And one I haven't seen a character for.
Glynda: Ugh... You're right. Come on!
*Save files pop up*
Okay, i'm ending it here because this is going on for a long time for me. Whatever.

You wanted this. I had to deliver. Well, let's just turn this on and...

...IMMEDIATELY, we have video from the things. I didn't even press a button!

As you can imagine, it's kinda hard to accurately do FULL MOTION VIDEO on a Screenshot LP. Draw your own conclusions.

Like honestly how can I? If I try to use the GIF function it's going to take too long.

And we're back to game. Well, since you asked for it, continuing.
AU!Pit: You okay?
Red (I don't want to see 15 comments on her name, this is just for continuity and it will be revealed soon enough): I'm fine. But I won't let him get away!
Glynda: Brace yourselves! It's attacking!

SUDDENLY BOSS FIGHT
And I found out that if I click off the RPG thing, including to get Gyazo, it freezes until I click it again. Far more helpful.

Either way I kicked it to the street. Despite being a helicopter. Don't ask.

yay another levelup for Pit (+200 L and Full Potion!)

YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY FROM ME THAT EASILY FMV (even though it kinda did)
Ruby (thanks battle menu): So, your a Huntress?
Ruby: Can I have your autograph?! (actual line)
I found a fangirl. Great. NOBODY SHIP IT.
GAME: Ozpin dropped you off at a hotel and took the girl away.
GAME: You decided to rest.
Because I'm smart.
GAME: The next day. In the airship to Beacon...
I'm not entirely sure if that's grammatically sound.

The tiles seem slightly irritating, but that's just me. Either way, 3 NPCs.
Gold Haired Person at the Bottom Right: ...oh god... I think i'm gonna... *urp*
GAME: You should leave him be.
Yeah, no duh.
*the moment I start trying to talk to the two girls*
GAME: You overhear two people talking.
THEY'RE RIGHT THERE.
Gold Haired Girl: Oh, I can't believe my baby sister is going to Beacon with me! This is the best day ever!
So you're related to her, Fangirl?
Ruby: Please stop.
GAME: It's the girl from yesterday! Did they let her in too?
THIS IS THE AIRSHIP TO THE IMPORTANT PLACE OF COURSE
GHG: But I'm so proud of you!
Ruby: Really sis, it was nothing.
Except we pretty much had a Crutch Character we needed to use. (seriously, look at Glynda's stats!)
GHG: What do you mean? It was incredible! Everyone at Beacon is going to think you're the bee's knees.
There's a quirk in the text that makes the ' appear as you' re.
Ruby: I don't want to be the "bee's knees"! I don't wanna be any kind of knees!
Learn to speech.
Ruby: I just want to be a normal girl with normal knees.
GHG: What's with you? Aren't you excited?

Using ellipses as an actual block of text. Can't say i've seen that before.
Also, Ruby... CRUTCH. CHARACTER.
GHG: But you are special.
GAME: A news story is on the TV, it seems to be about yesterday.
BUT WHERE EVEN IS THE TV?

YOU CAN'T STOP ME NOW
(TV report on how that guy was convicted or something, before)

what is this art style and where can i hide from it
(I'm not going to infodump this entire scene. go watch episode 1 or whichever it is yourself)

DRAMATIC VIEW OF SHIIIIIIIIIP

I think the fact my character's on screen is code for "THIS IS SERIOUS BUISNESS NOW".
GAME: After a few minutes, you finally land at Beacon Academy.
Good. Now to advance more story!
GAME: You get off the airship, and start to look around.

And welcome to somewhere that's going to take 20 images to fully capture i think.
*ALMOST IMMEDIATELY EXPLOSION SOUND*
GAME: Was that an explosion?
YES.
GAME: It sounded like it came from up ahead.
*Game immediately moves player character to...*

HELLO NEW CHARACTER. YOU HAVE A CUT-IN SO I KNOW YOU MUST BE IMPORTANT.
Ruby: I am really, really sorry!
White Hair: Ugh! You complete, dolt! What are you even doing here? Aren't you a little too young to be attending Beacon?
First, remove comma. Second, you know nothing about main characters and age standards. I'll lend you my book on the subject if you want.
Ruby: Well... I...
White Hair: This isn't your ordinary combat school. It's not just sparring and practice you know. We're here to fight monsters! So watch where your going!
Absurdly long box. What else do you want me to say?
Ruby: Hey, I said I was sorry, Princess!
FIGHTFIGHTFIGHTFIGHT-
Some Offscreen Smartperson: It's Heiress, actually.

Hey look another character name!
Weiss: Finally, some recognition!
Black Hair: The same company infamous for its controversial labor force and questionable buisness partners.
And the lack of washing down the toilets twice daily.
Weiss: How dare-! The nerve of-! Ugh!
*Both Black Hair and Weiss leave*
Ruby: I promise i'll make this up to you!
Ruby: Looks like i'm not the only one having a rough first day...
I just got here. Hi.
Ruby: So, what's-?
...I didn't plan on her recognizing me right after I say hi to her. Once again, better with Kinect.
Ruby: *sigh* Welcome to Beacon...
GAME: Maybe you should say something...
Yes, obviously. But which options shall I be given?

Okay, let's think rationally. The third option is irrelevant to what happened, and the first one we already did, so...
AU!Pit: Rough day, huh?
Ruby: Yeah...Hopefully it will get better.
I think that qualifies as Tempting Fate. Brace for impact.

I think i'm going to screencap multi-dialouge options from now on for clarity.
Now to rationally agai- oh screw that.
AU!Pit: Was I that good?
Ruby: Yeah! You were pretty good! (+5 Self-Insert Ego)
Ruby: My name is Ruby Rose! Nice to meet you! What's your name?
I already knew your name from the combat screen.
GAME: You tell her your name.
As opposed to actually having the player character talk.
Ruby: WOW! Are those Dual Ranged Pistol Katanas?! Awesome! I got this! It's Crescent Rose, the Gun-Scythe!
Are all these weapons going to be some form of melee weapon with guns attached to them? Because i'm perfectly fine with that.

...yeah, I can see how she's not good with people if the Black and Weiss incident is to be remembered. Which it should.
AU!Pit: Not good with first impressions?
Ruby: You couldn't tell? Didn't you see what happened just now?

...Well, looks like we're getting our second party member for good here.
AU!Pit: Why don't we be friends?
Ruby: You and... me?
YES. WHAT IS THE PROBLEM WITH TWO MAIN CHARACTERS BEING FRIENDS.
Ruby: Heh, first you save me from an airship, then you wanna be friends? You really are cool! Thanks...
HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO MENTION GLYNDA WAS A CRUTCH CHARACTER
Also, that's a helicopter, not an airship. I think.
GAME: You sense Ruby's gratitude and cheerful attitude.
GAME: You are now friends with Ruby Rose!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY-
GAME: As you make more friends, you can spend with them after classes or whenever you have free time.
...That's a way to add an element.
GAME: The more time you spend with them, the closer you become.
(AU!Pit X Black Hair OTP time)

I'd assume up, but for the sake of story, let's amuse her. [THAT'S DISRESPECTFUL]
AU!Pit: Not a clue.
Ruby: I guess we should start looking then...
*right walking*

DAS DISRESPECTFUL
AU!Pit: Oh yeah. He was on the airship.
Gold Dave: Uhh... Was I supposed to take a left? Or was it a right? Maybe I should go back?
Ruby: Maybe we should help him?
WE DON'T KNOW THE ROUTE EITHER RUBY
Ruby: Hey, are you lost too?
Gold Dave: What? Oh uh... Nope. I know where i'm going!
LIAR-
Ruby: Great, we don't know where we're supposed to go. Can you tell us?
Gold Dave: Uh... Ok, i'm lost...
Ruby: My name's Ruby, and this is my friend! What's your name?
OOOOOOOH NAME!
Gold Not Dave: Well the name's Jaune Arc! Short, sweet, rolls off the tongue, ladies love it!
Ruby: Do they?
oooooooooh-
Juane: They will! I mean, I hope they will. You see, my mom says, uh... never mind.
Ruby: So...I got this thing.
Wait, what.
GAME: Ruby pulls out her weapon again.
I don't think I get the relevance.
Juane: Whoa! Is that a scythe?
No, it's a Gun-Scythe. Uncultured swine!
Ruby: It is also a customizable, high impact velocity sniper rifle.
Juane: A wha-?
I'm confused a bit too.
Ruby: It's also a gun.
Juane: Oh, that's cool!
WHAT ABOUT MY DUAL RANGED PISTOL KATANAS

...You know what, we should probably add this.
Better with Kinect counter: 3
AU!Pit: My twin katanas!
Juane: Neat!
Juane: Oh-uh, I got this sword.
Ruby: Ooooo! (I took precaution to get the exact amount of O's. You're welcome.)
Juane: Yeah, I've got a shield too.
...If this keeps up I may need to cut this off when I can save via pause menu. Sorry this isn't as actiony as before.
Ruby: So, what do they do?

AU!Pit: That's pretty neat.
Juane: You think so? Thanks!
Ruby: But, wouldn't it weigh the same?
I'm guessing that if I chose the other one Ruby would have said that's pretty neat instead.
Juane: Yeah, it does.
Ruby: Well, I'm kind of a dork when it comes to weapons. I guess I did go a little over board in designing it.
Pretty sure over and board shouldn't be seperated by a space.

THIS IS STARTING TO BECOME A VISUAL NOVEL AND I'M SLIGHTLY OKAY WITH THAT
AU!Pit: I made mine too.
Juane: You too?
That's what I just said.
Ruby: All students at Signal forge their own weapons. Didn't you make yours?
SUDDEN PLOT POINT!
Juane: It's a hand-me-down. My great-great-grandfather used it to fight in the war.
Which one, the sword or the shield?
Ruby: ...Sounds more like a family heirloom to me! Well, I like it. Not many have an appreciation for the classics these days.
Juane: Yeah, the classics.

SO MANY OPTIONS!
AU!Pit: Nope.
Juane: You think there might be a directory? Maybe a food court? Some sort of recognizable landmark? Is that a "no"?

EVEN MORE OPTIONS!
AU!Pit: We best start looking then.
I feel like I might get control again, but let's not get our hopes too high.
Ruby: Okay! We'll follow you!

GOOD I GOT CONTROL. Yeah, I think it's gone on for a good amount of time, so i'm gonna cut it off here as well.

-TOTALLY USELESS STATISTICS-
Gameplay Time at Start: 18:36
Gameplay Time at End: ~30:20
TOTAL TIME ELAPSED: ~12:15
BATTLES FOUGHT: 1
LEVELS GAINED: 1 (AU!Pit)
LIEN OBTAINED: 200

WE NEEDED TO GO DEEPER AND HERE WE ARE
Let's go right. Nowhere else to go, kinda.

Wait what.

OH GREAT IS THIS THE MAZE LEVEL?
*IT WAS A DEAD END*
Okay, now let's go left from the original point.

Oh, you're REAL funny.
I'm going to go up now.

why is the top of this tree solid when i'm not even close to it

That's one way to make NPCs. MAKE THEM ALL SHADOW PEOPLE.
Ruby: Hey, I gotta go! I'll see you after the ceremony!
WHAT CEREMONY
Juane: Hey, wait! Great, where am I supposed to find another nice, quirky girl to talk to?
Well, you have a lot of options. There's shadow person #24 there, in the bottom left...
Juane: Anyway, I'm going to find somewhere to stand.

Okay, this might be a game-altering choice. Well, since you can't choose for me...
*Follows Ruby*

I don't think I know what I did just yet.
Ruby: You mean since you ditched me and I exploded!?
Gold One (was her name mentioned yet): Yikes, meltdown already?
Ruby: No, I literally exploded a hole in front of the school! And there was fire, a-and I think some ice...
How do you make ICE from an explosion?
...don't answer that.
Gold One: Are you being sarcastic?
GEE WHAT GAVE YOU THAT IDEA

...I think that's her in earshot. Just pointing out.
Ruby: And I felt really, really bad! And I just wanted her to stop yelling at me!
Weiss: YOU!
Told you.
Ruby: Oh God, it's happening again!
IT'S HAPPENIGN
Weiss: You're lucky we weren't blown off the side of the cliff!
Gold One: Oh my God, you literally exploded.
Ruby learned Self-Destruct!
Ruby: It was an accident! It was an accident! What's this?
GAME: The crabby girl pulls out a pamphlet and shows it to Ruby.
THAT'S DISRESPECTFUL TOO
Weiss: The Schnee Dust Company is not responsible for any injuries or damages sustained while operating a Schnee Dust Company product.
THAT'S IRRELEVANT AND WHAT IS EVEN THE USE OF DUST IN THIS UNIVERSE ANYWAY
I NEED AN EXPLANATION
Weiss: Although not mandatory, the Schnee Family highly encourages their customers to read and familiarize themselves with this easy-to-follow guide to Dust application and practice in the field.
DEAR GODS THAT WAS LONG. They even needed to put it into TWO text boxes!
GAME: That was...fast.
NOT FOR ME I HAD TO TYPE THAT OUT
Ruby: Umm...
Weiss: You really want to start making things up with me?
Ruby: Absolutely.
*Monty Python "You must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest with...a herring!" joke*
Weiss: Read this and don't ever speak to me again.

I AGREE WITH THIS
Ruby: Yeah! Great idea, sis!
See? Even the main characters do!
Ruby: Ahem, hello Weiss, I'm Ruby. You want to hang out? We could go shopping for school supplies.
This won't end well, will it?

Is that sarcasm? Because I think that's sarcasm.
Ruby: Oh wow, really?
*music fades out*
I knew it wouldn't end well.
Weiss: ...No.
SEE? WHY AM I A PSYCHIC AT THIS GAME?

Again with this. It's no wonder this game is around 800 MEGABYTES in size.

BLAH BLAH BLAH JUST GET BACK TO THE SELF-INSERT
GAME: Everyone went back to the sleeping area after the speech...
Wanna specify what that is? No? Okay.
GAME: There was no room for you though, so you decide to take a breather outside.

It fills you with DETERMINATION, right?
GAME: The silence seems strange after the recent days you've spent without it...
*Enter Juane*
Hello again.
Juane: Oh? You're here too?
Obviously.

both of these seem a bit like an insult to me. stupid opinions.
AU!Pit: Great minds think alike.
Juane: Yeah! I would have to agree!
how did that work
Juane: By the way, thanks for helping me earlier. I probably would have missed the ceremony if it wasn't for you and Ruby.
We spent a couple minutes bumping into TWO dead ends, man.
Juane: Speaking of her, she is downstairs having another shot at making friends, but it isn't going so well. I'm pretty sure Weiss got involved again...
"She's", developer, USE YOUR CONTRACTIONS.
Juane: Also, I gotta ask, what's with you and Ruby? You just met, right? Yet you already seem like best buds.
NEVER DOUBT THE POWER OF A MARY SUE SELF-INSERT, JUANE

Well, AU!Pit X Black Haired Girl OTP, so...
AU!Pit: She's just a friend.
Juane: Oh? That means my chance is slightly bigger!
.1 percent more, Juane. .1 percent more.
Juane: Oh well, to be honest, i'm more into Weiss...
Explanation pls

TIME TO MAKE A SECOND FRIEND
AU!Pit: Anytime.
Juane: Heh heh. Cool.
GAME: You sense Juane's nervousness and his friendly attitude.
GAME: You are now friends with Juane!
*cue confetti*

But isn't this sunset?
GAME: You and Juane went inside and found a place to sleep.
GAME: You wake up the next morning feeling both excited and nervous.
GAME: You went to the locker room to grab your weapons.
INFODUMP

Ruby: Heh, yep! No more awkward small talk or getting to know you stuff. Today I get to let my sweetheart do the talking.
Hmm. This might go places. Someone write that down.
Gold One: Well, remember Ruby, you're not the only one going through initiation. If you want to grow up you're going to have to meet new people and work together.
PHRASE THAT IS PROBABLY GOING TO BE RELEVANT I GUESS
Ruby: Ugh, you sound like dad. Okay, first of all, what does meeting people have to do with fighting?
Ever heard of the phrase "Defeat Equals Friendship"?
Ruby: And secondly, I don't need people to help me grow up! I drink milk!
Gold One: But what about when we form teams?
I think this is where the "RWBY" part starts to get relevant.
Ruby: Uhh... I don't know, I'll just be on your team, or something...
Gold One: Maybe you should try and being on someone else's team.
Nice english there m8. 8/8 no h8 or attempts at b8

Well, looks like it's time to become a lot more relevant.
AU!Pit: Hello...
Ruby: Oh! Didn't see you there!
You didn't at the ceremony, either.
Ruby: Oh yeah! I never introduced you two! This is my sister, Yang!
ANOTHER NAME GET. YES. THANKS.

YES OBVIOUSLY THAT WAS MENTIONED A LOT
AU!Pit: Likewise.
Yang: Why don't you be on this guy's team? You two seem friendly enough.
YES. LET THE MARY SUE GAIN A FOLLOWER.
(i'm making this so much better)
Ruby: Are you still trying to dodge being on a team with me?
*Yang backs away a space*
Yang: What? No, of course not. I just thought... I don't know, maybe it'll help you break out of your shell.
*Juane leaves because he was in the top-left*
Ruby: What?! I don't need to break out of my shell that's absolutely-
Juane: Ridiculous! There's no way I put my gear in locker 363 yesterday. I would have had to remember having to count that high... Oh, why does this have to happen today?
YOU'RE IRRELEVANT SHUT UP
Yang: Look, all i'm trying to say is that you need to make some friends...
Ruby: I have already made friends! This guy and Juane!
She has a point...
Ruby: And with you that's four! A full team!
But doesn't the pause screen show room for five?
Yang: Ugh... I suppose you're right...
Ruby: Speaking of Juane, what's up with him?
He misplaced his things. TIME TO FIX THAT. MAYBE.

who is Phyrra, why is Weiss and I better not hear any jokes about that
Ruby: This won't end well...
MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY.

I can see how good he is at ladies now.
Also, c-camera? Can you pan over?
Yang: Spoke too soon...
Intercom: Will all first year students please report to Beacon cliff for initiation. Again, all first year students report to Beacon cliff immediately.
Yang: I guess we should get going.
Ruby: I'll grab Juane. He probably won't get there on his own...
GAME: After making sure Juane was ok, you all went to Beacon cliff for initiation.
I think "cliff" should be in capitals.

LOOK AT THEM PEOPLE
Ozpin: For years, you have been trained to become warriors. And today your abilities will be evaluated in the Emerald Forest.
Glynda: Now, I'm sure many of you have been hearing the assignment of teams. Well, let's put an end to your confusion. You'll be given teammates...
And then everyone began talking about who they wanted to be with.
Glynda: Today.
Ruby: What?!
Ozpin: These teammates will be with you for the rest of your time here with Beacon. So, it is in your best interest to be paired up with someone you could work well with.
Ozpin: That being said, the first person you make eye contact with when you land will be your partner for the next four years.
This seems like a horrible idea for choosing.
Ruby: WHAT?!
See, even Ruby agrees with me!

WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
Ozpin: After you've partnered up, make your way to the northern end of the forest. You will meet opposition along the way. Do not hesitate to destroy everything in your path, or you will die.
HAVE WE LEARNED NOTHING FROM UNDERTALE
Juane: Haha... *gulp*
Ozpin: You will be monitored and graded for the duration of your initiation. But our instructors will not intervene.
Just in case, you know, something like a Grimm attack happens.
Ozpin (In the same dialouge box!): You will find an abandoned temple at the end of the path containing several relics. Each pair must choose one and return to the top of the cliff.
THIS BOX GOES ON FOREVER
Ozpin (Yet again, same box): You will guard that item, as well as you're standing and grade you appropriately. Are there any questions?
Yes, is this going to be on the test?
Juane: Yeah, um, sir?
Ozpin: Good. Now, take your positions.
THANKS FOR ACKNOWLEDGING HIM

Is the use of clips from the show like some kind of legal obligation or something?

Seriously these go on for like a minute
GAME: You landed with ease, somehow... Although you've never done something like this before, it felt... natural.
OH MY GOD IT REALLY IS GOING DOWN THE PATH OF MARY SUENESS
PIONO WAS RIGHT
GAME: Once you finish processing what happened, you start to look around.

HEY LOOK IT'S THE GRAPHICS FROM LAKE
OBJECTIVE: Reach the temple!
So, move north and maybe level grind. OK.

HOPE YOU LIKE LONG STRETCHES OF NOTHING
I'll cut this one off once we "get a partner".

OH COME ON WITH THESE GUYS AGAIN
*Literally took only 11 damage*

I'M THE BEST AROUND
(Levelup, 40L, Potion, whatever)

And this is the edge of this part of the map. I think plot will happen.

I was wrong.
(ANOTHER FIGHT WITH THE SAME ENEMIES. Just 40L this time)

Okay, walking north. Hopefully this will actually end with a person get.
(ANOTHER SAME FIGHT. I FOUND OUT YOU HEAL AFTER A BATTLE. 40L + Potion)
(AND ANOTHER ONE. I FOUND OUT CRITS EXIST TOO. 40L + Potion again)

And the map ends here too. Let's see what else doesn't happen.

You're not seeing that wrong. That tile cutoff is there. I didn't edit that.
Also, SPLIT PATH.
*goes left*

I'd really like my partner now...
Wait. Is this going to be a "you did it without a partner? WHA?" situation? In that case, i'll cut it off at the temple.

And here is the merge of the paths. Good.
(FIGHT. +40L AND POTION.)

THE ONLY PERSON I DON'T KNOW IS BLACK HAIR PLEASE HELP

It's a clearing. This must be a good sign.

PFFFFFFFF-
YES! YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO I'M PICKING!
*Black Hair wasn't interactable*
OH SON OF A BIT!
*Interacts with Yang instead*

Good. Now to get the name.
AU!Pit: Who's this?
Yang: Oh, that's Blake! Me and Ruby met her yesterday!
When?

Good, now I can start to close off the episode. I think.
AU!Pit: Let's get out of here.
Yang: Alright, let's find this temple and leave!
Blake: Be careful though, we don't want to run into any more Ursa.
What Ursa? ALL I'VE FOUGHT IS GRIMM RODENTS.

Either way, I got partners. Let's stop this episode here, that qualifies.

This one was long.
TIME START: 30:20
TIME END: 45:30
TOTAL PLAYTIME: 15:10
BATTLES FOUGHT: 5
LIEN OBTAINED: 200

BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD

And we're back here. Fantastic. Time to go up and fight more rats.

...Or to the left. My bad.

Welcome back to emerald forest. Did you miss it?

Well, neither did I, really.

What the heck are these?
(THEY'RE CALLED BEOWULFS)

QUALITY. +210L

Maze? MAZE?

MAAAAAAAAZE!
(Cutting out this entire part. Nobody wants to see anybody who's not a popular youtuber mess around in this.)
(FIGHTS:
1. Game randomly gave my team almost full action bars. 70L, Hi-Potion
2. Same thing. Pit Levels (INCLUDING COVER FIRE SKILL!), 140L, 2 Hi-Potions
3. Nothing of note except no almost full bars, 140L, Hi-Potion
4. My party took probably 25% of their lifebars out, no matter, 210L
5. IT KEEPS HAPPENIGN, 140L, 2 Hi-Potions
6. I think I start to make progress towards the real end, 140L, Hi-Potion
7. SO MANY ENCOUNTERS, 210L
8. DEATH BY CRITICAL, Pit + Yang + Blake Level, 105L)

That took about five minutes. Maybe.

*Characters self-move*
YES WE HIT TEMPLE

Well, when we entered this zone, it said "Forest Temple", so...
*UNNEEDED FADE SHOT TO SHOW NPC PLACEMENT*
Blake: Chess pieces?
Yang: Some of them are missing. Looks like we weren't the first ones here.
OF COURSE!
Blake: So...I guess we should pick one.
*Yang moves*
Yang: Hmm...how about a cute little pony?

I don't think that's a pony
Blake: Sure.
Yang: That wasn't too hard.
*CUE BOSS FIGHT*
Blake: Well, it's not like this place was very hard to find.
WE HAD TO DO A MAZE
*Screaming noises*
Yang: Some girl's in trouble! Blake, did you hear that?
Yang: Guys, did you hear that? What should we do?
DO THE RIGHTEOUS THING AND BE AN HERO
Offscreen Whoever: Heads uuuuuuuuuup!! (I counted those u's. You're welcome.)
GAME: Something fell on you!

Hello again Ruby.
AU!Pit: I'll live.
Ruby: Man, you are tough.
NEVER DOUBT A MARY SUE
Blake: Did your sister just fall from the sky?
Yang: I...
COME UP WITH CRACK THEORIES ON WHAT SHE DID NOW!
*AND THEN JUANE STARTS TALKING FROM OFFSCREEN*
Juane: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! (not accurate representation of amount of As or Hs in actual game)
Ruby: Juane?
GAME: Juane flies through the sky and lands in a tree.
7.9/10
That Orange Haired Girl: Yeeeehaaaa! Aww, it's broken.
Did we ever learn about you?
GAME: Nora and Ren appear, with an Ursa...
oh great a fight's about to happen isn't it
Green Haired Person Who I Assume Is Ren: Nora, please don't ever do that again.

THAT'S NOT A QUEEN EITHER
Ren: Nora!
SEE? REN AGREES.
Nora: Coming Ren!
...Think there needs to be a comma in between those.
Blake: Did that girl just ride in on an Ursa?
I don't know, they didn't show that in a cutscene. You tell me.
Yang: I...

THERE REALLY IS A BOSS FIGHT

HYPE IS PREPARING

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPENING

oh hey look it's everyone's favorite character
...You can't see it in images, but I think there's audio syncing issues. THE LIPS.

I CAN SEE HER RIGHT THERE

oh no the cutscene went on
i'm a terrible person for not catching it

AND NOW
BOSS TWO
(I LOST, BUT NO GAME OVER SCREEN. INSTEAD...)

Yay, forced loss battles!

Send in more then two people.
Weiss: Look, there's no sense in dilly dallying, our objective is right in front of us.
Ruby: She's right. Our mission is to grab an artifact and head back to the cliff. There's no point in fighting these things.
Juane: Run and live, that a plan I can get behind.
Grammar work is required.
Ren: Let's go!
GAME: Everyone grabbed a chess piece and ran.
DON'T MAKE ME DO THAT MAZE AGAIN
GAME: You came to a bridge, Ruby, Weiss, Yang, and Blake got across before it was destroyed by the Nevermore.
Was that boss two?

OH SNAP DUDE EDGE IS HAPPENING

BUT I HAVEN'T USED ANYONE HERE IN COMBAT YET ASIDE FROM ME
AU!Pit: Stay together!
Do I Remember If Red Hair Had Been Named Yet: You're right! If we work together, we can win!

Oh, she's Pyrrhon's sister.

STOP ENCOURAGING THE GAME
Pit Levels X5 (INCLUDING KATANA DANCE SKILL!), Juane Levels X4 (INCLUDING SHIELD BASH SKILL!), Pyrrha Levels X4, Ren Levels X4, Nora Levels X4, 1200L, Power Up, Speed Up, Luck Up
GAME: Before you understand the situation, Nora hit you with her hammer and you land next to Ruby and the others.
108.45 Meters! A NEW RECORD!
Weiss: Nice of you to join us!
What is these lyrics you can't hear

OH COME ON NOT AGAIN!
AU!Pit: Always.
Yang: That's what I want to hear!
Blake: Let's end this! NOW!
ROUND TWO?

Oh. It's something else.

Katana Dance is a two-hit Ignores Defense attack for 30 SP. I think that proves we really are a Mary Sue, Piono.
Pit Levels X3, Ruby Levels X2, Weiss Levels X2, Blake Levels X2, Yang Levels X2, 1500L, Aura Up, Resist Up

THERE'S TOO MANY CUTSCENES, JIM, WE HAVE TO ABORT

WE CAN'T COMPLETE OUR MISSION (I took this like 25 seconds after the first one)

I NEED SOMETHING GERMAN
GAME: Ruby's plan was a success, and you all headed back to beacon to attend the ceremony.
And we still have no partner.
GAME: However, you were not allowed to take part, due to the teams being even already. So, Ozpin told you to report to his office after the ceremony.
And now, it's time to see the explanation for why we're part of the main cast. This is going to be fun.

But first, more footage.

So, how's everyone doing? I'm fine.
GAME: Later, in Ozpin's Office...

Here we go. Time to see the explanations in action.
AU!Pit: Because I'm not on a team?
Ozpin: Exactly.
I'M GOOD AT THINGS
Ozpin: You see, every year when I accept students into Beacon, I make sure the number of students is divisible by four...
Will this part be explained?
Ozpin: Except this year is different. You and Ruby were both last minute acceptions. And since you both show amazing skill, I decided to break this rule.
...Yep. Piono's Mary Sue Theory 101% Confirmed.
Ozpin: The way you performed in the Emerald Forest gave me an idea. You will be a member of...

What. What.
AU!Pit: Um... What?
Ozpin: Well, what you did down there and in your hometown, was extraordinary.
Ozpin: You worked well with both teams, and most importantly, you gave them hope and lead them to victory.
I don't think pressing Z repeatedly is leading a team.
Ozpin: So, you will work with both team RWBY and JNPR. If the leaders can't decide what to do in a situation, you step in.
Oh, I get it. Except I kinda already got the name gimmick.
Ozpin: The four years you spend in Beacon will be tough. There will be a great struggle ahead of you...
(PLEASE LAUGH AT THE FACT YOU THINK THIS IS GOING TO BE HARD...NOW.)

Sorry for lack of images. Kinda.

I'd like to ask that question, actually.
AU!Pit: Has this happened before?
Ozpin: No, you are the first to take this position.
(FEEL PROUD OF BEING RIGHT NOW, PIONO) (I'm also good at english.)
Ozpin: Alright, let me explain this to you. You will be managing both RWBY and JNPR. You can rearrange members as you see fit, depending on the situation.
Ozpin: If you think that certain members will work best with a mission, you may take them with you. Also, if the leaders can't make a decision, you make it for them.
So I am the commander. Oh boy.
Ozpin: I do believe that's about it. Oh, one more thing...
THAT'S NOT IT.

Oh it's that thing I never used once so far.
AU!Pit: It is speed, well, since recently.
Ozpin: Let me explain. Your semblance is Mimicry, you can copy the semblance of anyone you have a connection to. That is why you were able to keep up with Ruby.
What kind of a stupid power is Heart anyway? ...wait.
Ozpin: That was also how you are a natural fighter, you can Mimic the moves of others, allowing you to use weapon and abilities of others, after you get to know them.
HE LOOKED ON THE GROUND AND FOUND WEPON
Ozpin: Your friendship with Ruby allowed you to copy her semblance perfectly. This is a rare abilty, use it well. (actual typing)
Oooooooooooof course it's rare.
Ozpin: I've kept you here long enough. Enjoy your time here, make friends, and fight for what's right. Goodbye.
GAME: You decide to leave.

byyyyyyeeeee

MY MARY SUE POWERS HAVE BEEN FOUND OUT! THE LOCATION'S COMPROMISED!
AU!Pit: Why are you here? (this is an option, other one's too stupid to share)
Yang: We came to see you!
Blake: We were worried when you didn't appear at the ceremony...
Juane: Yeah, what happened?
GAME: You explain everything Ozpin told you.
Weiss: So...you're our manager?

Even Weiss thinks this is stupid.
Juane: Hey, I'm glad to have someone to turn to. At least you're not booted from Beacon!

DID I NOT EXPLAIN
AU!Pit: It is my semblance.
Juane: Well, now that we found you, I'm going to bed.
Ren: Yes, we need to rest for tomorrow.
Ruby: Yeah, I think I will sleep well tonight...
GAME: You all decide to call it a night. You start classes tomorrow...

Hey, is that the prototype for the GameSquare next to the TV?

Who even are those two in the topright?

I'm guessing I can now begin bonding with characters now. BLAKE X AU!PIT HERE WE COME!
...next episode.

TIME START: 45:30
TIME END: 1:08:15
TOTAL TIME: ~25:15
LEVELS GAINED: Like a lot
Does anyone care about these?