(1} 1/?? ??????????

+Jobboe +piopo


I heal H31MD4LL up more, this time by renaming him to H31MD4LLR, as is proper.



Originally posted on 2017-10-25 12:06:00

Yes, I really should have said so earlier, but no dop today. Apologies. 4-5ish hours of sleep is bad for the thinking power. Instead, a vote.


Would you rather I kept trying to push out an everyday dop, or switch to a one-per-two schedule and adjust the post count limit instead?

Originally posted on 2017-10-25 16:11:00

one per two seems like it would work better with your schedule.

Originally posted on 2017-10-25 20:09:00

tbh, yeah.
I dont think we need more posts, however.

/null

Originally posted on 2017-10-25 21:31:00

QUOTE (pionoplayer @ (time=1508862025))

I +1 JOE and TOG 12/15 for The Final Hour A passing chef takes the pootis bird scout and cooks it up in a stew.

cO: that sounds painful

One can hear very high-pitched screaming sounds as the pootis bird scout is not quite killed by being stewed. That seems painful indeed. 4 damage.

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1508876707))

2/10 new stuff. +1 tog+1piono yeah, but sandwich man should have ~11 HP i think, a 4 turn special, and most of my charge went to giving me that other buff mentioned before (unless that was way easier to do in which case i guess sandwich man should be that way? I move on to the new craze: ice cream! first, I'm going to need to buy an ice cream making machine, so I get a job

cO: you do realize that sandwich man being that healthy as half a 25 post charge means hes already kind of nerfed in current state right

QUOTE (pionoplayer @ (time=1508877368))

I +1 JOE and TOG 14/15 for The Final Hour In preperation for The Final Hour, I set up a grandfather clock. It's just a clock. It doesn't do anything special, it's just a clock with a health bar. Well, presumably it WILL do something special next round. but right now its just for decoration.

cO: spoopy

There is a clock on the battlefield. It looks kind of weak. Better use it soon.

QUOTE (ThatOtherGuy @ (time=1508879986))

(12 +4} 16/16 M3N5H3N I Summon a M3N5H3N, a giant sentient door that alternates between [Closed] and [Ajar]. It can only be attacked while closed, but who it's bodyguarding can only be attacked while open. I set it to bodyguard H31MD4LL +Jobboe +piopo H31MD4LL IS... waiting to be useful, ok? It's one giant attack, and I want to keep him around until it can be used properly. Meanwhile, I infect him with nanites that will hopefully heal him over time. New status effect? Also, he was designed specifically to survive nuclear damage, thus the whole fridge thing. He is a *Nuclear shotgun* turret, after all. statipedia -[Burning] deals [1] [fire] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Can be [stacked] for increased burn time and damage using flammable items. Known causes: flaming weaponry. -[Radiated] at the end of every [EOTB], the affected target has a [1%] chance to gain a [Mutation]. Who knows what that could do! Can be stacked to increase chance. Known causes: radioactive byproduct. -[Radiation Burn] does [?] [radiation] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: combining [1] stack of [Burning] and [1] stack of [Radiated]

cO: whats a menshen

M3N5H3N summoned. The door is shut. H31MD4LL has been granted NANOMACHINES, SON.

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1508926794))

5/13 new stuff. +tog+piono +1 tog+1piono I start working on my job.

cO: jobs sound really really tedious you go to a place and do a thing for a lot of hours and get green paper thrown at you sometimes

QUOTE (ThatOtherGuy @ (time=1508929570))

(1} 1/?? ?????????? +Jobboe +piopo I heal H31MD4LL up more, this time by renaming him to H31MD4LLR, as is proper. statipedia -[Burning] deals [1] [fire] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Can be [stacked] for increased burn time and damage using flammable items. Known causes: flaming weaponry. -[Radiated] at the end of every [EOTB], the affected target has a [1%] chance to gain a [Mutation]. Who knows what that could do! Can be stacked to increase chance. Known causes: radioactive byproduct. -[Radiation Burn] does [?] [radiation] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: combining [1] stack of [Burning] and [1] stack of [Radiated]

cO: what does r stand for

Medicine applied. 3.5 health restored. Wot.

---

cO: i like how nobody did a thing to the ravine

Chillmodder decides to watch the pootis birds. One of them, the Scout, immediately flies at sandwich man to take a bite. It seems to hit pretty hard, because there goes a chunk of 3 health. The bigger vanguard screeches out a warcry, heralding more birds next turn, then rockets into the grandfather clock... Ouch. 4 damage.

cO: oh yeah careful of the birds once they start swarming
cO: they hit kind of hard

Sandwich man applies some lovely good healing to H31MD4LL, helping make up about 4 more health. That's better.

Beat.

cO: rocket

Chillmodder proceeds to fire a single explosive projectile across the ravine again. It crashes into the recently-made door, shaking it violently on impact in the force of a 9.5 damage explosion. Jegus. Looks like the fire blast also singed the sandwich man for 2 damage.

---

Battlefield - Seaside Property

AC
Piono: exists
Joe: exists
Emerald: exists
ThatOtherGuy: exists
H31MD4LL, Nuclear Sentinel: 20.5/28 hp, one shot (Radiated!) (NANOMACHINES)
M3N5H3N, the door: 30.5/40 hp, guarding H31MD4LL, closed
Sandwich Man: 17/22 hp, apparently very heal-based or something
Grandfather clock: 1/5 hp

PC
Pootis Bird Vanguard: 12/12 hp
Pootis Bird Scout: 5/9 hp
Poorly Justified Ravine: 57% filled in (randomly interferes with attacks on the Chillmodder)
Chillmodder: 48/50

Originally posted on 2017-10-26 13:55:00

I +1 JOE and TOG
15/15 for The Final Hour
3/20 for A Question of Fate...

15/15 for The Final Hour.
Tick Tock goes the clock the time is counting down
Oh tick tock goes the clock the chime is soon to sound.
Yes tick tock goes the clock the time is drawing near
For tick tock goes the clock your doom is almost here.

Like that poem? It took me all of five minutes to write.

Suddenly the grandfather clock strikes twelve. It's midnight. Again. And the final hour. The face of clock swivels open, revealing a portal to infinite nothingness on the other side. Well, not total nothingness. Some things still swirl in the half-existence on the far side of the door. Things just waiting to crawl through.
And one of them does. It immediately darts out of the grandfather clock, burning the clock out of existence with its passing, as it draws on the substance of the things that are real to try and stabilize itself.
It immediately darts for the nearest beings that are available for murdering. The pootis birds. The two birds squawk in fear as the THING latches onto them and drains their existence right from them, draining all their health and their existence away.
It then turns out to just be a fleshy blob that uses all the charge power not expended in destroying the pootis birds to fill up the ravine by falling into it with a damp squishing sound.

Originally posted on 2017-10-26 19:45:00

7/14 new stuff. +piono
+1 tog+1piono
Sandwich man is supposed to regen all his HP - 1 at the end of each EOTB, and has no standard action. he only acts after four rounds of life.
hence why I thought he has too much MHP.
I finish working at my job, and get green paper thrown at me, which I use to buy an ice-cream maker machine. ice-cream I make, like all my other foods, will tempbuff people who bother to Actually, you know, EAT them.
unlike every time but once.
I proceed to make some vanilla icecream, starting small. oh, and it has a hybrid between raisins and chocolate chips on it. because I'm not starting that small.


Originally posted on 2017-10-26 21:28:00

(2+4} 6/??


+Jobboe +piopo

I fill in the ravine more, using magical magics that I won't bother going into here, because I don't want to hurt your brain with its complexity



Originally posted on 2017-10-26 22:19:00

I +1 JOE and TOG
6/20 for A Question of Fate...

If the ravine isn't filled, a freak earthquake, caused by an underground butterfly flapping its wings, shifts the bottom of the ravine upwards, lifting everything and filling the ravine a bit.
If the ravine IS filled, this launches the top layer of stuff off the top and into the Chillmodder.

Originally posted on 2017-10-27 03:15:00

10/16 new stuff. +piono +tog
+1 tog+1piono
I eat my vanilla ice-cream, and use the resulting buff to make some chocolate blueberry ice cream! which, as stated before, will buff the eater.

Originally posted on 2017-10-27 11:36:00

(7} 7/??

If the ravine isnt already filled in, I use this to fill it in

+Jobboe +piopo


The r doesn't stand for anything. Otherwise it'd be H31MD4LL R or something.
No see, Heimdall's name in Norse is technically Heimdallr, though we usually cut out the r in pop-culture because we have no sense of culture or taste in word-sounds.
Menshen are divine guardians of doors and gates in Chinese folk religions.
This particular one is named 5H3NTU, just so you know.
The more you know!

The Chillmodder cannot for the life of him accept that someone schooled him when he is supposed to be the BBEG here. Thus, he uses godmodding to go back in time and start publishing tones of books and articles about these facts before I can tell them to him. He gets super famous and is very well loved by scholars and civilians alike everywhere, until one day on a talk show, his arch-nemesis the Legendary Ardorcendant comes on his Chinese folklore based talk show and shows the whole world, live on camera, this:

QUOTE (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Menshen)

Menshen or door gods[1] are divine guardians of doors and gates in Chinese folk religions

This scandal is, of course, one of the biggest the world had ever seen, and the Chillmodder is soon run out of the studio, his workplace, his house and family's life, his planet and the heart of his people.
From there, things quickly spiral into a spiraling depression, which ends with him nearly at the end, standing at the edge of a cliff, on edge, waiting to take that final leap and leap off to his death. He's about to do so when he instead realizes that he could easily get revenge on the Ardorcendant instead. So he plans, and plans, and calculates, and prepares, and so on and so forth until the Ardorcendant comes and just pushes him off the cliff. As he falls, he realizes that this is the end, unless he can put all this behind him and activate the one true power that is truly being chill. He attempts to harness the power of Chillmodding... and it works! Instead of falling, he begins to fly! Fly high up in the sky so high very high there's a drug joke in here somewhere high! however, as his dreams of being Pupa Pan come to fruition, and he escapes his horrible world, the "more you know" star crashes into him, and he gets rainbowed into nothingness.



Originally posted on 2017-10-27 21:51:00

QUOTE (pionoplayer @ (time=1509043510))

I +1 JOE and TOG 15/15 for The Final Hour 3/20 for A Question of Fate... 15/15 for The Final Hour. Tick Tock goes the clock the time is counting down Oh tick tock goes the clock the chime is soon to sound. Yes tick tock goes the clock the time is drawing near For tick tock goes the clock your doom is almost here. Like that poem? It took me all of five minutes to write. Suddenly the grandfather clock strikes twelve. It's midnight. Again. And the final hour. The face of clock swivels open, revealing a portal to infinite nothingness on the other side. Well, not total nothingness. Some things still swirl in the half-existence on the far side of the door. Things just waiting to crawl through. And one of them does. It immediately darts out of the grandfather clock, burning the clock out of existence with its passing, as it draws on the substance of the things that are real to try and stabilize itself. It immediately darts for the nearest beings that are available for murdering. The pootis birds. The two birds squawk in fear as the THING latches onto them and drains their existence right from them, draining all their health and their existence away. It then turns out to just be a fleshy blob that uses all the charge power not expended in destroying the pootis birds to fill up the ravine by falling into it with a damp squishing sound.

cO: hmm i should probably put other things up if people keep doing the damages to things that arent me

Chillmodder sits contemplatively and watches the rather unfortunate Pootis Bird Scout get mincemeated, while the Vanguard apparently manages to fly away enough that it just takes a lashing for 4 damage. The ravine fills 7.5% up.

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1509049730))

7/14 new stuff. +piono +1 tog+1piono Sandwich man is supposed to regen all his HP - 1 at the end of each EOTB, and has no standard action. he only acts after four rounds of life. hence why I thought he has too much MHP. I finish working at my job, and get green paper thrown at me, which I use to buy an ice-cream maker machine. ice-cream I make, like all my other foods, will tempbuff people who bother to Actually, you know, EAT them. unlike every time but once. I proceed to make some vanilla icecream, starting small. oh, and it has a hybrid between raisins and chocolate chips on it. because I'm not starting that small.

cO: oh
cO: wouldve probably been nice to know a little earlier

QUOTE (ThatOtherGuy @ (time=1509052786))

(2+4} 6/?? +Jobboe +piopo I fill in the ravine more, using magical magics that  I won't bother going into here, because I don't want to hurt your brain with its complexity statipedia -[Burning] deals [1] [fire] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Can be [stacked] for increased burn time and damage using flammable items. Known causes: flaming weaponry. -[Radiated] at the end of every [EOTB], the affected target has a [1%] chance to gain a [Mutation]. Who knows what that could do! Can be stacked to increase chance. Known causes: radioactive byproduct. -[Radiation Burn] does [?] [radiation] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: combining [1] stack of [Burning] and [1] stack of [Radiated] -[Nanomachines] ??? Known causes: nanite swarms

cO: leaving things ambiguous doesnt really help you do things very well i must say

3.5% filling.

QUOTE (pionoplayer @ (time=1509070518))

I +1 JOE and TOG 6/20 for A Question of Fate... If the ravine isn't filled, a freak earthquake, caused by an underground butterfly flapping its wings, shifts the bottom of the ravine upwards, lifting everything and filling the ravine a bit. If the ravine IS filled, this launches the top layer of stuff off the top and into the Chillmodder.

cO: youd be surprised how much time and effort it takes to fill in a simple hole

4.5% filling. Better.

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1509100569))

10/16 new stuff. +piono +tog +1 tog+1piono I eat my vanilla ice-cream, and use the resulting buff to make some chocolate blueberry ice cream! which, as stated before, will buff the eater.

cO: i have no idea how i missed this post earlier but good for you you ate ice cream

QUOTE (ThatOtherGuy @ (time=1509137494))

(7} 7/?? If the ravine isnt already filled in, I use this to fill it in +Jobboe +piopo The r doesn't stand for anything. Otherwise it'd be H31MD4LL R or something. No see, Heimdall's name in Norse is technically Heimdallr, though we usually cut out the r in pop-culture because we have no sense of culture or taste in word-sounds. Menshen are divine guardians of doors and gates in Chinese folk religions. This particular one is named 5H3NTU, just so you know. The more you know! The Chillmodder cannot for the life of him accept that someone schooled him when he is supposed to be the BBEG here. Thus, he uses godmodding to go back in time and start publishing tones of books and articles about these facts before I can tell them to him. He gets super famous and is very well loved by scholars and civilians alike everywhere, until one day on a talk show, his arch-nemesis the Legendary Ardorcendant comes on his Chinese folklore based talk show and shows the whole world, live on camera, this: QUOTE (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Menshen) Menshen or door gods[1] are divine guardians of doors and gates in Chinese folk religions This scandal is, of course, one of the biggest the world had ever seen, and the Chillmodder is soon run out of the studio, his workplace, his house and family's life, his planet and the heart of his people. From there, things quickly spiral into a spiraling depression, which ends with him nearly at the end, standing at the edge of a cliff, on edge, waiting to take that final leap and leap off to his death. He's about to do so when he instead realizes that he could easily get revenge on the Ardorcendant instead. So he plans, and plans, and calculates, and prepares, and so on and so forth until the Ardorcendant comes and just pushes him off the cliff. As he falls, he realizes that this is the end, unless he can put all this behind him and activate the one true power that is truly being chill. He attempts to harness the power of Chillmodding... and it works! Instead of falling, he begins to fly! Fly high up in the sky so high very high there's a drug joke in here somewhere high! however, as his dreams of being Pupa Pan come to fruition, and he escapes his horrible world, the "more you know" star crashes into him, and he gets rainbowed into nothingness. statipedia -[Burning] deals [1] [fire] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Can be [stacked] for increased burn time and damage using flammable items. Known causes: flaming weaponry. -[Radiated] at the end of every [EOTB], the affected target has a [1%] chance to gain a [Mutation]. Who knows what that could do! Can be stacked to increase chance. Known causes: radioactive byproduct. -[Radiation Burn] does [?] [radiation] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: combining [1] stack of [Burning] and [1] stack of [Radiated] -[Nanomachines] ??? Known causes: nanite swarms

cO: uh
cO: i genuinely cant tell if that was directed purely at me or if that clause that makes it fill in the ravine if it isnt full yet applies
cO: idk maybe the latter

Speaking of, the Chillmodder concentrates, and a flare of golden energy rockets out of the ravine. That attack would probably have been able to damage him, true, but there's something mildly annoying in the way, which shakes slightly and pulls the "more you know" star down into the ravine instead of letting it hit the Chillmodder. There's a shaking sound upon impact... it seems the star caused a bit of a cave-in near the top, filling the ravine in considerably. Like... 12%.

---

cO: well this might get interesting soon i didnt actually anticipate the ravine failing that quick but oh well

Most of the entities on the battlefield seem to be somewhat defensive in nature, so there's not much to go with there. The Vanguard does rocket into the air, then slam itself down on the clock, shattering it for good, though. Oh, and Sandwich Man regenerates up, along with the NANOMACHINE-enhanced H31MD4LL.

Chillmodder stands where he is. He watches as M3N5H3N opens, then apparently picks up his own chair and hurls it across the ravine, letting it slam full-force into the vulnerable H31MD4LL for a staggering 16-damage impact! This one just seems to be straight damage to a single entity, so no nasty surprise tricks to worry about, and a bit of the edge was taken off by healing over time.

A somewhat bigger Pootis Bird variant flaps down to the battlefield, glowering across the battlefield as it decides who to go for... It seems a bit slow-thinking, really.

---

Battlefield - Seaside Property

AC
Piono: exists
Joe: exists
Emerald: exists
ThatOtherGuy: exists
H31MD4LL, Nuclear Sentinel: 6.5/28 hp, one shot (Radiated!) (NANOMACHINES)
M3N5H3N, the door: 30.5/40 hp, guarding H31MD4LL, open
Sandwich Man: 21/22 hp, apparently very heal-based or something
Grandfather clock: 1/5 hp

PC
Pootis Bird Vanguard: 8/12 hp
Pootis Bird Scout: 5/9 hp
Pootis Bird Steaksmasher: 16/16 hp (deciding target...)
Poorly Justified Ravine: 84.5% filled in (randomly interferes with attacks on the Chillmodder)
Chillmodder: 48/50

Originally posted on 2017-10-28 14:35:00

12/17 new stuff. +tog
+1 tog+1piono
I eat the chocolate blueberry ice-cream, and use the power buff to make some apricot- and- date ice-cream, with a pitted prune on top. (warning, may contain pits)

Originally posted on 2017-10-28 18:57:00

I +1 JOE and TOG
10/20 for A Question of Fate...

The pootis bird vanguard becomes a steak. And is thusly attacked by the pootis bird steaksmasher

Originally posted on 2017-10-28 20:30:00

(8 +4} 12/13 again, I guess. Same amount as charges as another H31MD4LL? Sure, why not.



+Jobboe +piopo

Before the M3N5H3N closes, H31MD4LLR, realizing he's close to death, activates his special ability: Actually shooting something for once.
The little freezers that are always on top of the fridges. You know those? H31MD4LLR's opens. Within, there is an unfortunate lack of meats, frozen deserts and snow dads, for it is instead filled with some random, boring-looking machinery. Most of what's going on in that robot brain is entirely incomprehensible, with the exception of a small screen flashing between [Ragnarök], [Gjallarhorn] and [Activate]. A resounding horn blows, and the actual fridge door swings open. Again, a disturbing lack of dairy products and fruits. Instead, it's filled with dozens of large metal rods. From within the depths of the bigger-on-the-inside robot-fridge-god of doom, a nuclear explosion with the force of 3 dying suns blast the rods all across the PC side of the field, slaughtering all the enemies. All of them. They all die.
Presumably, this will kill him, though it would be nice if he just needed to reload.

I heal up the M3N5H3N.




Originally posted on 2017-10-28 22:22:00

15/18 new stuff. +tog +piono
+1 tog+1piono
I eat the ice-cream from before, again, unless TOG ate it.
regardless, I then create a large ice-cream sundae banana split with mangoes, 2 Cherries on top, and some glazed chocolate icing thing between the two. as always, consumption of my foods will buff the eater.

Originally posted on 2017-10-28 22:51:00

(13} 13/13. I summon another H31MD4LL, behind the M3N5H3N. This time, however, I wanna make it somewhat more unique. We'll see where this goes. For now, it's just like any old H31MD4LL Sentinal.

+Piopo +Jobboe


I toss some nanomachines (son) onto the M3N5H3N.




Originally posted on 2017-10-29 14:50:00

I +1 JOE and TOG
14/20 for A Question of Fate...

The steaksmasher finds what looks like a steak, and attempts to smash it, only for it to turn out to not be a steak and instead be a side of beef, which mortally traumatizes the steaksmasher pootis bird.

Originally posted on 2017-10-30 14:22:00

Due to an exam tomorrow, I am not able to update tonight, sadly. I will have the update out tomorrow to compensate, however. It'll come depending on when I can, and when I feel the motivation to.

Originally posted on 2017-10-31 10:29:00

cO: as it turns out the gm really sucks at keeping this going sometimes

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1509213420))

12/17 new stuff.  +tog +1 tog+1piono I eat the chocolate blueberry ice-cream, and use the power buff to make some apricot- and- date ice-cream, with a pitted prune on top. (warning, may contain pits)

cO: im running out of irreverent lines to spew on you

QUOTE (pionoplayer @ (time=1509219018))

I +1 JOE and TOG 10/20 for A Question of Fate... The pootis bird vanguard becomes a steak. And is thusly attacked by the pootis bird steaksmasher

cO: you may have overestimated the thinking speed of a bird that smashes

Nonetheless, that does seem to have helped increase the chance of friendly fire from one bird to the other.

QUOTE (ThatOtherGuy @ (time=1509225777))

(8 +4} 12/13 again, I guess. Same amount as charges as another H31MD4LL? Sure, why not. +Jobboe +piopo Before the M3N5H3N closes, H31MD4LLR, realizing he's close to death, activates his special ability: Actually shooting something for once. The little freezers that are always on top of the fridges. You know those? H31MD4LLR's opens. Within, there is an unfortunate lack of meats, frozen deserts and snow dads, for it is instead filled with some random, boring-looking machinery. Most of what's going on in that robot brain is entirely incomprehensible, with the exception of a small screen flashing between [Ragnarök], [Gjallarhorn] and [Activate]. A resounding horn blows, and the actual fridge door swings open. Again, a disturbing lack of dairy products and fruits. Instead, it's filled with dozens of large metal rods. From within the depths of the bigger-on-the-inside robot-fridge-god of doom, a nuclear explosion with the force of 3 dying suns blast the rods all across the PC side of the field, slaughtering all the enemies. All of them. They all die. Presumably, this will kill him, though it would be nice if he just needed to reload. I heal up the M3N5H3N. statipedia -[Burning] deals [1] [fire] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Can be [stacked] for increased burn time and damage using flammable items. Known causes: flaming weaponry. -[Radiated] at the end of every [EOTB], the affected target has a [1%] chance to gain a [Mutation]. Who knows what that could do! Can be stacked to increase chance. Known causes: radioactive byproduct. -[Radiation Burn] does [?] [radiation] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: combining [1] stack of [Burning] and [1] stack of [Radiated] -[Nanomachines] heals [?] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: nanite swarms

cO: um

Well then. One big old burst of smashing damage, coming right up. It appears to have cleaned away the vanguard, but also hit the steaksmasher for a staggering 10 damage! If you do the maths, that's 18 damage in a single burst. Now, the only problem is to get that ready again... There also seems to have been a bit of recoil damage. It's only going to get worse as time goes on, it seems...

QUOTE (JOEbob @ (time=1509227463))

15/18 new stuff. +tog +piono +1 tog+1piono I eat the ice-cream from before, again, unless TOG ate it. regardless, I then create a large ice-cream sundae banana split with mangoes, 2 Cherries  on top, and some glazed chocolate icing thing between the two. as always, consumption of my foods will buff the eater.

cO: im not sure if anyone seems to be taking interest in your ice cream business id hate to point out

QUOTE (ThatOtherGuy @ (time=1509288623))

(13} 13/13. I summon another H31MD4LL, behind the M3N5H3N. This time, however, I wanna make it somewhat more unique. We'll see where this goes. For now, it's just like any old H31MD4LL Sentinal. +Piopo +Jobboe I toss some nanomachines (son) onto the M3N5H3N. statipedia -[Burning] deals [1] [fire] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Can be [stacked] for increased burn time and damage using flammable items. Known causes: flaming weaponry. -[Radiated] at the end of every [EOTB], the affected target has a [1%] chance to gain a [Mutation]. Who knows what that could do! Can be stacked to increase chance. Known causes: radioactive byproduct. -[Radiation Burn] does [?] [radiation] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: combining [1] stack of [Burning] and [1] stack of [Radiated] -[Nanomachines] heals [?] damage at the end of every [EOTB]. Known causes: nanite swarms

NANOM3N5H3NS, SON. Also, another H31MD4LL.

QUOTE (pionoplayer @ (time=1509373322))

I +1 JOE and TOG 14/20 for A Question of Fate... The steaksmasher finds what looks like a steak, and attempts to smash it, only for it to turn out to not be a steak and instead be a side of beef, which mortally traumatizes the steaksmasher pootis bird.

cO: that poor bird

If one looks really closely, they can just start seeing the steaksmasher staring blankly into oblivion, questioning everything it knows... which is, to be honest? Not a lot.

---

cO: i really need better mooks

The steaksmasher is thoroughly confused and irritated at having had to push its brain to the very edge of what it can do. Which is about 40 IQ, if one wants to know. It proceeds to sit down with a yell, needing time to figure out how to use such complex materials like brains again. Meanwhile, the door and the sandwich man don't really have attacks, so they just sit there doing their proper jobs.

cO: see these guys are hopeless
cO: mkay i guess ill have to actually put more effort than no effort in wont i
cO: i have no idea what to target so everything is target now

There's a crackle of golden energy. An icy wind blows... Then, the Chillmodder cracks his neck, leaps over the ravine, and slams hard into the ground on the other side, kicking up a storm of ice shards. They embed themselves into the nearby entities... The poor door seems to have copped a double load of ice shards, and yet some have nonetheless made it past, a few more impaling the sandwich man. This did have the consequence of putting Chillmodder on the "people who are fighting him" side of the ravine.

...Also, there appears to be two more birds. One of them looks really frail, but has keen eyes. The other one has an almost regal appearance to it, and... big-ass metal fists. Because why not. After this pair, there surely can't be too many left, right? The rate at which they keep coming is practically asking for a boss fight to come soon... maybe.

Battlefield - Seaside Property

AC
Piono: exists
Joe: exists
Emerald: exists
ThatOtherGuy: exists
H31MD4LL, Nuclear Sentinel: 1/28 hp, reloading (Radiated!) (NANOMACHINES)
H31MD4LL, Nuclear Sentinel: 23/28 hp, one shot
M3N5H3N, the door: 12.5/40 hp, guarding H31MD4LL, closed (NANOMACHINES)
Sandwich Man: 16/22 hp, apparently very heal-based or something

PC
Pootis Bird Vanguard: 8/12 hp
Chillmodder: 48/50
Pootis Bird Steaksmasher: 6/16 hp (deciding target...)
Pootis Bird Ironwing: 24/24 hp (protecting the Targetmaster)
Pootis Bird Targetmaster: 4/4 hp (protected by Ironwing)
Poorly Justified Ravine: 84.5% filled in (randomly interferes with attacks on the Chillmodder)
Empty Space: pretty much where the Chillmodder usually stands.

Originally posted on 2017-11-01 15:12:00