Destroy The Godmodder

As my laser artillery continues charging, I notice the Terror Squid transforming into the Terror Kraken. Thinking "Well, this makes things interesting.", I draw my pistol and fire several shots at the tentacle.

Charges: 3/5

I launch a harpoon at the kraken and anchor it to the planet.

"More than likely, this is a bad idea."

The monolith continues to charge... hey shouldn't it have fired something? A shadowy, ominous chanting can faintly be heard near the Monolith.

Monolith Charge 3/4

I go to the Terraria forums and ask for some reinforcements. A Shroomite armored fellow with a Chain Gun loaded with Explosive Bullets comes to my aid.

Missile Status: 4/15

Alright, everyone voted for 2, so here we go:

1: I get actual Dimentio to use the TARDIS to go to Hoover Dam, then disassemble it.

2: Using those parts, I create a generator to power up the TARDIS more.

3: I use the TARDIS and the generator to make a time warp, speeding up time in a general area.

4: I go to some Pokemon scientist to buy genetically altered leppa berries, which I then plant in the time warp.

5: I summon 200 Wobbofets with mouths on the back of their heads, which I then stitch together a la The Human Centipede , but in a sphere.

6: I summon 200 pacifiers and 200 tiny portal guns.

7: I put a tiny portal(blue) at the end of all the pacifiers, while the other portal(yellow or orange or whatever) go underneath the leppa farm in the time warp.

8: All the Wobbofets get the pacifier in their 'back' mouth.

9: I use the TARDIS to teleport the Wobbofet sphere around the Godmodder.

10: The Wobbofets spam Mirror Move and Counter, reflecting all moves the Godmodder sends.

11: The Wobbofets use Mirror Move on gravity, bringing them into the air.

12: The genetically altered time-warped leppa berries keep them from running out of PP.

13: We win?

Herobrine: 6/20 (possibly less/more because of the Timey-Wimey Ball with the TARDIS)

Epic Plan: 1/15

Yeah, I am aware how RIDICULOUSLY contrived this is, but whatever. This'll (likely) improve my chances.

...Holy crap this thread is addictive. I wish my thread were like this.

edited 4th May '14 8:03:16 PM by Dimentiosome

I cast a diffusion spell, summoning an ambient magical energy field to boost magical rituals in the area.

3/5 and 16/20 on Dreig's stuff, 4/6 on Trip's summon, 3/8 on Armored Fury's Enchanters, and 4/4 on Omega's Monolith (or 5/4 and a boost to its effectiveness should he use it next turn).

The ambient magical energy will also stay for the next turn, and may be used to boost oneshot actions of a spellcasting nature next turn.

Unfortunately, the Godmodder may also be able to harness the ambient magical energy I have created (balance for helping with so many charges at once).

BTW, the reason I'm focussing most of my assists on Dreig's stuff is because I wanna see Touhou Danmaku Ownage in the house.

edited 2nd May '14 3:55:05 PM by MicoolTNT

Though he feels it has a long way to go before it reaches any kind of legitimate status, CZW Heavyweight champion Drew Gulak praises what he calls the 'sanitary atmosphere' of Chikara expresses his wishes to bring the company's roster on his campaign for a better Combat Zone. Before he can begin in earnest however, he feels a purge is in order, that the counter culture, deviants, miscreants and other self destructive elements of Chikara must be removed, announcing Degeneration X at the top of his hit list. Kimber Lee then snatches the microphone and says Chyna will forgive what she is about to do after she learns what she is to become in another 17 years. Degeneration X then appears on the entrance ramp, starring down Dewey, Tofiga, Alexander James and rest of the Gulak campaign.

"It takes guns to load a gun!" Skater says in self congratulation, trying to hide the strain she is feeling. "If we joined the DX army for real, I'd be the world's biggest member! Better yet, when we get back DX will be joining us." Meanwhile, Tomoka was line up the barrel. "Now, shoot!" This time the package burst over the kraken, showering it in instantly ignited glow sticks, which Tomoka figured would overwhelm the eyes of the deep sea creature with their brightness.

The Auto-Revive kicks in, causing me to spring back into action.

Artorias Summon Charge: 5/6 (thanks micool)

Edit: Sorry, I derped.

edited 3rd May '14 7:49:09 PM by OmegaShadowcry

Q&A: omega! Only one post per update! Also, guys, you can't boost entities. Entities have to charge their own stuff on their own. Omega anchors the kraken to the planet, making unable to dodge attacks and dealing 500 damage. Also, I'm assuming that dimentio's plan is being charged right now, not implemented as a one post thing. Also, mikool, when I said don't abuse your ability to help other people, that meant boosting everything at once. Please don't do it again.

Earl convinces one of his friends to join his subreddit, he then stabs the tentacle for 500 damage. Fury casts a weak protect spell, but the godmodder counter-casts a strength spell. Dreig throws a flaming boomerang at the tentacle, dealing 750 damage to it. Ichigo fires at the tentacle, dealing 500 damage. jon asks for some help killing the kraken, and receives help from a friend who briefly jumps in, opens fire on the kraken dealing 1250 damage, and then leaves. Indirect attacks the kraken with a large shower of glowsticks, which don't actually deal any damage other than well, lots of glowstick falling on you hurts. 750 damage.

.

Battlefield:

the kraken summons another tentacle, and the two smash into the [OLAC] tank dealing 1000 damage to it before the tank retaliates and blows one to pieces. the subreddit opens fire on the kraken itself, dealing 2500 damage. The godmodder takes advantage of the massive charge boost, and sends the kraken into a rage! He then fires a really big boosted laser at the cosmic monolith, dealing 2500 damage to it.

.

Godmodder [GM]: Hp: 91/100

Enraged Terror Kraken [PG]: Hp: 40000/50000

Kraken Tentacle [PG]: Hp: 5000/5000

Pink Bulb [???]: 1/5000

MAASTRC-US [AG]: Hp: 13000/15000

weaponized subreddit [AG]: Followers: 23/25

Cosmic Monolith [AG]: Hp: 1000/5000 3/4

edited 3rd May '14 2:33:28 PM by pionoplayer

Gee, Dimentio sure is taking a long time to bring the TARDIS back...oh wait I forgot he's an evil 2.5D magical jester intent on destroying the omniverse. Eh, I'm sure we'll be fine. All I gave him was a time machine/spaceship that can go nearly anywhere in the cosmos. Also the Artifact of Doom he tried using to accomplish his goals is still intact.

...Oh, Crap!

I summon a Delorean to chase after him with.

Herobrine: 7/20

Epic Plan: 1/15 (currently on hold.)

I begin a mining project that will mine 1 Gem per turn. These Gems contain a magical power that can open gates to Grand Gaia and summon units. It takes 5 Gems to summon a Mega Rare unit. 1 Gem can be used to heal any summoned creature by 5000. Also, any and all hazardous pollutants generated as a result of the mining will be collected and stored for later use against the Godmodder.

Spell Card: 3/5

Gensokyo portal: 16/20

Gems: 0

The idols are en route. 5/7

"Ahri!"

"Siegfried!"

"Bahamut!"

"99942 Apophis!"

As the enchanters argue with each other, one of them thanks Micool and fetches some magical catalysts for the ritual. 5/10

Meanwhile, I fire an RPG at the Kraken.

edited 3rd May '14 5:28:18 PM by ArmoredFury

I mess up a Grox ship's radar to make it come to this planet, I then pay The Grox 5,000,000,000,000 Sporebucks for the ship to fight the Godmodder.

Missile Status:

5/15

Welp, 5/6 for Artorias

I conjure up Meteor, causing a METEOR to fall at the Godmodder.

The fury fills the air, shadows creep into my lungs, and silence lies over the battlefield like a sheet of lead. I know the Monolith well enough to know that It's going to overcharge.

I splash an extra-potent Healing Potion on the Monolith

Monolith Charge - 4/4 — Monolith overcharges for One round.

edited 3rd May '14 7:57:12 PM by OmegaShadowcry

With my laser artillery almost completely charged, I throw a Bolt of Divine Retribution at the Terror Kraken's tentacle. I then complete the cannon's calibrations as it locks onto the Terror Kraken.

Charges: 4/5

edited 3rd May '14 10:32:08 PM by IchigoMontoya

I pull a ginsu knife out of hammerspace and slice as much tentacle as I could for calamari.

1/20 I start a summon.

Meanwhile, the subreddit tries redirecting the Godmodder to some pornographic links like /r/gonewild. (distraction)

Eddie Kingston joins Triple H, Chyna and the heart break kid Shawn Michaels to face Full Prince Dewey Donovan, the giant Tofiga, Alexander James and the Fist Lady of The Combat Zone Kimber Lee in a massive 8 man person tag match! And in the main event, Drew Gulak will face the zombie princess Jimmy Jacobs. No stopping for snakes, no stopping for bathroom breaks, no stopping for blood, no stopping quad tears, no stopping for commercial breaks because Inter degenerational friendship will be nothing but an extended commercial for PAIN!...killers.

"Did not work... what else did they leave use for Kaiju?" Tomoka asked. "Big Battle, that's where we are?" Skater asked in return. "Well I'm sure the audience will come around, let's just skip the gimmicks and give em what they paid for." Skater continued before bursting out the top hatch again.

Standing on the roof Kellie shouted into her microphone "Now don't go thinkin too much of yourselves, cause you aint done nothing to deserve it, but since 3G is stuck here for now we are offering any two of you a chance to be educated by the tag team specialist from Oz and the Colossus of Of Bacchus Marsh!" Tomoka popped up behind Skater, wildly waving her hands in an effort to get anyone listening not to take the challenge seriously but it has been laid down none the less. Do the Godmodder and or any of his minions have the courage to wrestle 2 on 2 with the Gangsters under tag team rules?

Dang it, where did Airman go? I was looking forward to that Pi Countdown thing.

edited 5th May '14 6:08:26 PM by Dimentiosome

Q&A: you don't have to put your charges on hold dimentio. also, dreig, your gem scheme is entirely too overpowered. 5000 health for one turn? Slightly overpowered considering that we're at one post per round.

Oh crap, dimentio just did something exceedingly stupid. And due to the nature of the DTG universe, dimentio will probably come back at a later date to help the godmodder. A delorean is summoned, it then leaves to chase Dimentio. Dreig begins mining, it may or may not work as intended, it all depends on if the godmodder finds it shiny enough. fury charges his stuff and his enchanters argue, and the tentacle takes 500 damage. jon summons one of the grox, who immediately leaves to go tell his buddies that there is lots of money to be made in the tvtropes forum games section.

A massive meteor! Oh no! How will the godmodder dodge it? Answer: the best defense is a good offense, he just blows it up with a nuke. Omega heals the monolith for 1000 health just before it unleashes an overcharged death laser that deals 3000 damage to the tentacle and 1000 damage to the kraken. A bolt of divine retribution then hits the tentacle, dealing a further 750 damage. Earl then slices the tentacle into calamari, killing it. Then a challenge is issued... and the kraken accepts it!!! The proceeding beat down is so horrific that both of the gangsters are paralyzed with fear when so much as faced with calamari for the rest of their lives.

.

Battlefield:

The subreddit attempts to link the godmodder to inappropriate sites, but since this is supposed to be kid-friendly, he does not follow them. the [OLAC] opens fire on the kraken, dealing 4000 damage with its massive array of guns.

The kraken then summons with its great rage, two more tentacles to help it fight, and the godmodder, reposts the highly inappropriate links on the subreddit, causing it to be temporarily shut down, after which two members have left permanently.

.

Godmodder [GM]: Hp: 91/100

Enraged Terror Kraken [PG]: Hp: 35000/50000

kraken tentacle [PG]: Hp: 5000/5000

kraken tentacle [PG]: Hp: 5000/5000

Pink Bulb [???]: 1/5000

MAASTRC-US [AG]: Hp: 13000/15000

weaponized subreddit [AG]: Followers: 21/25

Cosmic Monolith [AG]: Hp: 2000/5000

Okay, let's make it 2 Gems for 3000 health, then. Would that be okay?

In any case, I call on the others to assist in the final stretch of the portal ritual. My Spell Card is almost finished. This will time out perfectly.

I also begin sewing an outfit.

Spell Card: 4/5

Gensokyo portal: 17/20

Gems: 1

Alright, I'm afraid I have to do this but... ANTI-MATTER BOMB TIME!

Missile Status: 6/15

I can feel it. The time is now. The monolith demands blood.

I radio my 'Mooks' aboard my flagship and tell them to be ready for Orbital Insertion.

Monolith Overcharged — 5/4 —- Monolith used Summoning Ritual: Cosmic Dragon!

Charges: 5/5

With my laser artillery now fully charged, I fire upon the terror kraken with a massive laser blast.

6/6

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

Artorias the Abyss Walker summoned!◊

He throws some Abyss corruption at the Godmodder, as I cast a 500 HP autoheal on him for 5 rounds.

edited 5th May '14 5:14:42 PM by Trip