Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21378

Mar 6, 2015

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Logic Cannon: 18/20

==Actions==

Lothyra is still trembling with apprehension. To ease her mind, she begins to alchemize Fluorite Octet && Carbon Nanogel. Suddenly, she receives a message.

C0mmand3r S1l3ntr3ad. D0 y0u r3ad us?
Dis? How did you find me?
1 assum3d that y0u had b33n s3nt t0 L1mb0 and d1r3ct3d 0ur transm1tt3rs t0 that l0cat10n.
Well, I think I'll need all the help I can get to leave this awful place
1 am 3ag3r t0 ass1st.
Great.

Meanwhile, a universe away...

BAD NEWS EVERYONE! It seems that Bender will not get some well-deserved rest, for I have found a way to send his avatar to Limbo!
Whoo!
Yeah!
All he has to do is run this computer program inside this flash drive...

The professor jams his flash drive into Bender.

HEY! WATCH IT!
...And he's back in action!

RUNNING sendtoaplacehermeslikes.exe

...

CHANGING AVATAR AFTERLIFE FROM ROBOT HELL TO LIMBO

...

AFTERLIFE CHANGED.

KILLING AVATAR.

AVATAR KILLED.

AVATAR IS NOW IN LIMBO.

Suddenly, Bender plops into Limbo.

I'M BACK BABY!
Bender, pfew. Guess that makes what I'm about to do easier...

Lothyra steadies herself.

Okay. I'm drawing on a power I thought I forever swore away from... Sigh. I can't believe I'm doing this. I should have locked this away... No, it's necessary. We have no other choice.

With a final push, Lothyra activates her Comb Rave, using it against the Gatekeeper.

Comb Rave Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AgcOH0cNRg

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21381

Mar 6, 2015

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Logic Cannon: 19/20

Fluorite Octet && Carbon Nanogel: 2/9

==Actions==

After the Comb Rave, Lothyra has to sit down and take a breath.

Focus on the mission... I need to focus...
Okay, let's start with something simple. A new weapon.

Lothyra then alchemizes Hollow Nanoiron Torus -O Shrink and Laser Medium Gas Mixture && Small Canister = Laser Medium Canister

LASER MEDIUM GAS MIXTURE: A mixture of carbon dioxide and nitrogen that is good for being used in a gas dynamic laser.

Meanwhile, Bender fires iQuantimak at the Limbo Gatekeeper.

Hey, why are you so mopey?
It's nothing!

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21394

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Logic Cannon: 20/20 Complete!

Fluorite Octet && Carbon Nanogel: 3/9

Small Hollow Nanoiron Torus: 2/2 Complete!

Laser Medium Canister: 2/?

==Actions==

More weapons... more weapons...
I can't let myself be caught vulnerable like that ever again.

Lothyra previews iAntimak || Shotgun and iAntimak && Shotgun, as well as their descriptions. She then rolls the Fluorite Octet at the Limbo Gatekeeper.

Meanwhile, Bender pulls out the two copies of iAntimak Pistol and dual wields them, firing them at the Limbo Gatekeeper before using Guns Akimbo at the Gatekeeper.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21456

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Fluorite Octet && Carbon Nanogel: 4/9

Laser Medium Canister: 3/3 Complete!

==Action==

Hey, can you tell me what the hell was going on with that Homestuck Space stuff?
I don't want to talk about it, Bender!

Lothyra rolls the Fluorite Octet at the Gatekeeper, then alchemizes Mirror -O Shrink and Turbine -O Shrink. Bender uses Supercell on the Gatekeeper.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21480

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Nanoctet: 6/9

Tiny Mirror: 2/2 Complete!

Tiny Turbine: 2/2 Complete!

==Actions==

Crossing the streams? Dangerous yet clever. Nice job, Bender.
Whoo! That's what I'm talking about!

Lothyra alchemizes Expansion Nozzle -O Shrink and Tiny Mirror & Aluminum Foil = Tiny Semitransparent Mirror. She then gathers sacred items and uses Existence Now on the Gatekeeper. Bender uses the manipulative powers of the Remote Magnepulators to make the Gatekeeper bite his shiny metal ass.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21525

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Nanoctet: 7/9

Small Expansion Nozzle: 2/2 Complete!

==Actions==

Lothyra retries alchemizing Tiny Mirror & Aluminum Foil & Name Tag = Tiny Semitransparent Mirror again.

SEMITRANSPARENT MIRROR: A mirror that has been coated with Aluminum Foil underneath the surface and has had its back removed, allowing it to act as a beam-splitter. Some of the light that hits the mirror gets reflected, and some passes through. A necessary component for many laser systems.

Also, I forgot to give the description of the expansion nozzle and iAntimak (you wanted it for iAntimak && Shotgun and iAntimak || Shotgun).

EXPANSION NOZZLE: A funnel-shaped device that is used to expand any compressed gas that is shot through it. An essential component of a gas dynamic laser.

IANTIMAK: A sleek black rifle, identical to the iTokomak, but it now is powered by and produces antimatter, perfectly contained in a canister.

Lothyra also alchemizes Small Expansion Nozzle -O Shrink. She then uses Megaversal on the Limbo Gatekeeper. Bender uses the unholy rock powers of Effslayer to suck some of the dark power out of the Limbo Gatekeeper. If that doesn't work, he uses the Fluorite Octet (again on the Limbo Gatekeeper).

Lothyra then speaks to the Council.

Okay, then, what do you think I'm guilty of?

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21583

Mar 11, 2015

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Allotrope Octave: 2/9

Small Gas Cooler: 2/2 Complete!

==Actions==

Lothyra responds to the Council.

"Dangerous experiments." "Not meant to be mixed." "Unethical genetic augmentation." Ugh, you know what, you old farts can go shove it! You people couldn't possibly understand what it takes to survive in this multiverse, especially when you're trying to AVOID breaking the laws of physics! I NEED my antimatter tech! I need my augmentations! These are how I continue to stay relevant in a world full of [REDACTED] archmages and universe eaters! I can't let myself show weakness or be held back by the standards of LUDDITES! I. Have. No. Other. CHOICE!
...
Okay, fine. You want me to protect reality? Here, I'll make some tools to do so.

She then begins working on another weapon. She alchemizes Scranton Reality Anchor > Fine and Small Gas Cooler -O Shrink, as well as previewing iAntimak & Shotgun, iAntimak || Shotgun, and Battery Nanopack > Fine. She then loads the Red Barrels (something alchemized a long time ago...) with a Scranton Reality Anchor and fires it at the Gatekeeper. Bender rolls the Nanoctet at the Gatekeeper.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21626

Mar 12, 2015

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

Allotrope Octave: 4/9

Scranton Reality Weight: 2/6

==Actions==

Lothyra notices Scratch.

Well, well, well. Look who finally decided to show up. I know you, Scratch. You're the one who sent the Crockercorp ships into Minecraftia, right? The same ones that terrorized my company and almost destroyed it? You probably couldn't care less, of course. To you, I'm just a footnote. Well, was. I've been waiting for a chance at payback for a long time. You want a show? I'm happy to oblige.

Lothyra then activates UU Ultimatum, and orders UU Prime to bodyguard the Owl Effigy. Meanwhile, Bender sets up a Bussard Ramjet funnel to suck some Red Sun energy from the Red Sun and give it to Split.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=21868

Mar 21, 2015

+2 to Talist

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: =========

My Boomstick: 9/9 Complete!

Realistic Laser Rifle: 3/?

Scranton Reality Weight > Fine: 2/7

==Actions==

You know what, screw it, this place is gonna blow in a few minutes.

Lothyra absconds to the entrance.

==Scratch Fight==

Lothyra tests My Boomstick by firing it at the Cultural Rainbow, then types in TRIFORKS as a code in the alchemiter and alchemizes the result. Bender uses Megaversal on the Owl Effigy to heal it. He then buys a potion of Critmist II from Wilson.

==Zombie Fight==

The zombie attacks the door of the Hut again.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=22081

+2 to Wilson

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 8/9 (because colors aren't working)

Wilson Money: $2

Scranton Reality Cannon: 5/8

Allotrope Decad: 4/11

iAntipistolet: 2/10

==Actions==

You know what, all this chain-draining is getting ridiculous.

Lothyra inputs "Something that can and will break Split's chains" into the Origin Wands, then uses it on Split's chains. Bender uses Supercell on the Uberclone.

==Village Pillage==

The zombie, seeing how the Blacksmith's door has been broken down, moves to the Church.

==Limbo==

Suddenly, Lothyra begins wandering off on her own. In the real world, Bender notices that Lothyra is distracted and hops into Limbo, trying to find her. After wandering, he encounters the bleak ruin of a forest village. In its heyday, it possessed an ethereal beauty, with embellishments of glittering crystal and gold decorating the elegant buildings, built into the trees themselves. But now, the buildings have collapsed, destroyed by a massive and the crystals' and gold's luster has faded. There is nobody else there, except for one. Bender finds Lothyra standing in front of what used to be the largest tree in the entire village, now just a burnt out husk.

I never realized how beautiful it was...

Right in front of her stand five tombstones, each having a Sburb aspect symbol engraved into them.

Void, Breath, Time, Light, and Doom.

The Breath tombstone has a bundle of vibrantly colored flowers placed right before it. It looks recent.

Hey, Loth, what's going on? You look like you've seen a ghost
Bender?! What the hell are you doing here?!
I'm here to check on you! You've been unresponsive for five minutes!
Just leave me alone!
Hey, come on, even Fry isn't this standoffish about his feelings! Can't you just tell me something?!
Why do you care so much, anyway?! You're a sociopathic robot!
And you're on my do-not-kill list!
Aaaagh! No, no, no! Just... nevermind this, let's just go!

Lothyra absconds from the ruin in a hurry.

I knew she was hiding something! Damn it, now she's making me feel sad! A meatbag tugging at my nonexistent heartstrings!

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=22602

+2 to Generic.

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 5/9

Wilson Money: $2

The Dicestaction: 9/30

The Third God: 10/50

Orb of Supernova: 9/11

Stellar Decad: 5/11

Bunsen's Decad (doing this instead of Mineral Decad for now): 2/11

==Actions==

Lothyra observes the strife.

A strife, then? Very well, Scratch. I've got about a million attacks up my sleeve, and I'm not afraid to use them.

She then begins by reaching into her inventory and pulling out every antimatter weapon she's ever alchemizes. She puts the all in a line, points them at the Disk of Mojang, and pulls all the triggers. All of them. A titanic barrage of mostly 0.001 gram antimatter bullets emerge from the guns and collides into the Disk. Immediately the code that makes up the Disk annihilates with the antimatter, converting it into a massive amount of gamma rays, which spread out in a giant explosion. She then pulls out the Two Thousand Decad (Scranton Reality Cannon & Fluorite Decad) and rolls it at the Disk. It's effect sucks up some of the Disk's reality warping energies. Meanwhile Bender has been gathering sacred items, but now he joins the brawl steps into the chaos! He then pulls out an old, battered guitar. He starts singing a folk song about a heroic robot and his evil adversary, a powerful disk. The disk blocked many of his attacks until it got rammed by a relativistic space train. Then it could be more easily exposed to more attacks. But that's just a story, right? It couldn't actually come to life unless Bender was still plugged into that 3D-printer back in New New York. Oh wait. He still is. Cue the relativistic space train crashing into the Disk (that's actually a reference to a Futurama episode named 40% Leadbelly). Lothyra then decides she needs some more firepower. She uses the sacred items that Bender gathered to use UU Ultimatum. UU Prime appears, guns deployed. He looks like he's about to open fire when he reaches back and pulls something out. It's the... no! It can't be! It's the... MY GOD... it's the Matrix of Leadership! It glows with a sliver light. He inserts it into his sword and raises it skyward. Suddenly, out of the Void emerges a legion of transformers. Both Autobots and Decepticons are present, united by the threat of the Psi-Godmodder. They then proceed to attack the Disk by doing an indescribably epic action sequence that makes Michael Bay's look like kids playing on a playground that involves a cobra, a miniature planetoid, lots and lots of lasers, a shoebox, Meagan Fox, a WWII Spitfire, some loser, and ends with the Fallen draining an entire duplicate of the Sun with the device hidden in the Pyramids of Giza and firing the energon all at once at the Disk. The army of transformers then leave, having served their purpose. Bender meanwhile, is standing awkwardly with his battered guitar. Suddenly, he receives an unexpected pester from a man entombed in his cursed mummy armor, calling Bender from his Moonbase which isn't on a moon....

affableConjurist [AC] began pestering awesomeAutomaton [AT].

AA: Holy crap, it's Dumbledore!
AC: Bender, you must rock the [REDACTED] out.

affableConjurist [AC] ceased pestering awesomeAutomaton [AT].

Bender stares at his guitar in disgust.

You know what, that's it, Bender's breaking out the big guns!

He then throws the guitar on the ground, breaking it. Bender then withdraws his REAL guitar, [REDACTED]slayer, from a dimension where all screamed for naught.

Wrought from the sliver heart of heaven's false promise, laced with vessels that pulsed with angel's menstrual blood, hewn from the horns of Satan's generals, it laughed as it was set loose, a laugh that only Bender can hear, but no one can share.

Bender swings the guitar at the Disk of Mojang. He then saw how little it does. Bender vomits steam and summons a great meteor from the Void to smash into the battlefield (in Minecraft) and kill everyone there, for no reason at all. Bender continues to channel his rage through [REDACTED]slayer. The angel blood boils as he summons the great meteor, encased with the blood of the tiny [EXPLETIVE REDACTED]lings in Minecraft, leaps on to it, and flies to the Homestuck troll's session with the sheer power of his rock solo. He encases the entire meteor in a wreath of holy [EXPLETIVE REDACTED]fire and flies through LOQAM (Aradia's planet), killing the [EXPLETIVE REDACTED] out of it (hey the Godmodder's just going to regenerate them anyway in DTG: MSPA Edition). Then he sends LOQAM's carcass into LOSAZ (Tarvos's planet), killing the [EXPLETIVE REDACTED] out of it and making every consort's [DATA EXPUNGED] in that Incisphere explode, and inside every [DATA EXPUNGED] a booby sang of mortal life's fleeting precipice. Bender then does fly his meteor through the Void, punching horrorterrors in half with his metal fists encased in [EXPLETIVE REDACTED]fire and throwing their eldrich hearts into the past with retcon powers where they enslave troll caveman on Alternia so that history changes and there are now grimdark troll cavemen on Alternia. Finally, Bender returns from his journey and channels the So-Bad-It's-Good hilariousness and juvenile awesomeness of the previous paragraph into a giant laser made of explosions using [REDACTED]slayer, which hits the Disk of Mojang. Sadly, [REDACTED]slayer breaks from the eldrich energies that are unleashed. Lothyra watches all the chaos, then shouts at Scratch in a mocking tone.
Guess what, Scratch?
THE ATTACK RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION

For you see, while all of that was going on, she had set the Scranton Science Gun to constantly absorb the Disk of Mojang's reality warping energies and shoot them back at it, then absorb the shot again to create an infinite loop. She then had encased both the Disk of Mojang and the Scranton Science Gun with SCP-155's time accelerator and an infinite battery from Universal Electricity, and it had been making the loop repeat itself faster and faster for a while . Just to be sure, she had also encased the setup in a Somebody Else's Problem fields so that no one would notice it. The shots from the Scranton Science Gun are now a straight line because of the time acceleration. She checks the time since activation. 8 minutes and 10 seconds. The beam of light glows more and more intensely, ultimately almost blinding everyone with the power. Then... 8 minutes and 15 seconds. The time accelerator has now reached infinity. The entire setup explodes, disabling all of the fields. The Disk of Mojang had been exposed to an eternity of being blasted. Results are predictable. And with that,

DETECTIVE

+2 to Generic.

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 5/9

Wilson Money: $2

The Dicestaction: 15/30

The Third God: 20/50 (+2 from Crystal)

Stellar Decad: 10/11

Bunsen's Decad: 7/11

Mineral Decad: 5/11

==Actions==

Damn it, that stupid muppet managed to get the last laugh on me, Bender!
Enough, Bender. He's dead, we need to focus on the mission. We can't let ourselves get held back by past grievances!
https://soundcloud.com/jason-sixty-four-197...verted-fate-ost
Held back... Hey, wait a second, does this have anything to do with that place I saw you at in Limbo?
Ugh, I told you to drop it, Bender! We're in the endgame, now! The Godmodder won't show weakness, so neither should we! We need to attack him with everything we've got! No holding back! No inhibitions!
Normally I'd agree with you, but you think that maybe you're taking things a bit TOO far?
Never thought I'd hear that coming from you...
Well, something about the way you're acting... it doesn't feel right, you know? It's like one of those TV shows where the characters claim to have learned some kind of lesson by the end of an episode only to forget it by the next episode...
Everything is fine, Bender! Now drop this, we have to focus on trying to get your coworkers into this server!
Eh, fine. Let's get back to work, it's already been five minutes and I haven't killed anybody!
Finally. Now, the first order of business is to apply that entity upgrade I've been saving since Limbo...

Logic Cannon: 20/20 EXPENDED

The Science Cannon's Scranton Reality Anchors upgrade once more to tier 3. As well as doing more damage, they can now target any logical inaccuracy or plot hole. The Science Cannon also gains more hit points and is now named the Logic Cannon.

Let's see if we can get one more upgrade out of this...

Reality Cannon: 1/30

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=22737

Apr 9, 2015

+2 to Generic.

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 5/9

Wilson Money: $2

The Dicestaction: 16/30

The Third God: 23/50 (+2 from Crystal)

Stellar Decad: 11/11 Complete!

Bunsen's Decad: 8/11

Mineral Decad: 6/11

==Actions==

Lothyra alchemizes Physics Textbook & Fluorite Decad. She then requests Generic to alchemize Quantum Mechanics Textbook & Fluorite Decad. This will be my last science related Decad. She sics the Logic Cannon on the PG entity with the least health (by the time of the EoTB, of course), then turns to Epona II.

So what, is this some Zelda thing? Eh, I always thought the Master Cycle was cooler.

She then tests out the Stellar Decad on Epona II.

==Orbital Nexus==

Pr3s1d3nt N1x0n? W3 hav3 d3alt w1th th3 1ssu3s d3lay1ng th3 C0unt3r-1nvas10n. W3 w1ll 0p3n th3 1nt3r-un1v3rsal p0rtal 1n appr0x1mat3ly tw0 3arth days.
Finally! We've all been waiting an entire year to get some sweeeeeeeeet REVENGE! ARROOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
V3ry w3ll. R3ady y0ur f0rc3s. W3 w1ll b3 wa1t1ng.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=22904

Apr 14, 2015

+2 to Tazz.

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 5/9

Wilson Money: $2

Reality Cannon: 5/30

The Dicestaction: 19/30

The Third God: 38/50

Mineral Decad: 10/11

The Oblivionator: 4/11

==Action==

Hah. All entities going on Team Excelsior gives us a perfect opportunity... Bender, open the portal! Start the Counter-Invasion!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cE6xw3IF1FA

The Counter-Invasion: 50/50 Expended!

Bender steps out from under the Godmodder's Tower and begins uttering the Time Code from Bender's Big Score. A green sphere appears, and Bender hops in it, disappearing from view. Suddenly, everyone with Time powers begins to detect an enormous set of disturbances in the timeline, and everyone with Space powers notices that the spacetime continuum itself is being destabilized! Hundreds of Benders pop out of the ground and gather near the spawn point as the players realize that the disturbance was caused by Bender making hundreds of trips through time using the time code, with each trip slightly contributing to the destabilization of the universe! Finally, spacetime reaches a breaking point, and with a burst of energy, an interuniversal rift appears in orbit around Godcraft inside the gateway built near the Orbital Nexus:



Immediately after the rift forms, the Scranton Reality Array built into the gate activates, stabilizing the rift into 3D spherical wormhole. Through the wormhole, a futuristic cityscape can be seen for a few moments before the view is blocked by hundreds of gray starships, each emblazoned with this logo:



Suddenly, the spacecraft all begin to pour out through the wormhole and head to the Tower, ready to climb it. The Futurama Gate descends to the Tower as well, ensuring that backup is always nearby.

Futurama Gate [AG]

HP: You determine this Twin.

Attacks: None.

Abilities: Summons entities in waves. How this will work is that every turn the Gate will summon certain entities. Each wave's attack fleet has three entity types: the Fighters, the Cruisers, and the Mothership. The Fighters are just your generic mook attack craft. They are individually weak but come in massive amounts. The Cruisers are larger,bulkier, and can actually stand on their own in a fight. However, there aren't that many of them. They also have a special attack that can be used every other turn. The Mothership is the main controller of the entire wave's fleet. It appears on the third turn that a wave is active. Once it dies, the wave ends. and no more entities from that wave can be summoned. A new wave begins three turns after the Mothership dies. It has a special attack like the Cruisers, as well as a Mega Attack that can be used every four turns. This is how it works (as an example): Let's say the first wave starts. On it's first turn for that wave, the Futurama Gate summons a ton of Fighters but only 1-2 Cruisers. The next turn, the Futurama Gate summons very few fighters but a pack of Cruisers. On the third turn, the Futurama Gate summons only the Mothership. After that, it summons some fighters and 1-2 cruisers per turn until the Mothership is killed. Then it waits three turns until the next wave begins, and the cycle starts all over again. Each wave will be themed.

But before the entities are summoned, there's one thing I have to do first.

Entity Boost (changed from Weapon Modules): 20/20 EXPENDED.

The power of the entities summoned have been augmented. Just so Twin won't have to nerf as much.

The First Wave: DOOP Fleet.

Fighter: DOOP Attack Craft.

HP: 750/750
Attacks: Generic Ray Gun. Deals 500 damage. Feel free to buff or nerf this, Twin.

Cruiser: DOOP Destroyer:

HP: 15000/15000
Attacks: Ray Gun Barrage: Can target up to 10 entities. Each entity targeted takes (5000/the number of entities targeted) damage. Missile Launch: Deals 4000 damage to its target and 1500 splash damage to two other enemies.
Special Attack: Missile Macross Massacre: Launches 8 missiles. Each missile deals 2000 damage to a random enemy targeted, as well as 1000 splash damage to two other enemies.

I won't put stats for the mothership until it arrives. So, as its first action, the Futurama Gate summons 100 DOOP Attack Craft and 1 DOOP Destroyer. And with that mammoth post...

DETECTIVE

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=24377

May 17, 2015

+2 to Crystal

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 1/9

Wilson Money: $2

Fastest Thing Alive:11/50 (+2 from Crystal)

Gotta Go Fast: 10/50 (+1 from Crystal)

From the Sidelines: 50/50 Complete!

Tesseract Manifold: 7/11

Gallium Arsenide: 3/3 Complete!

Antimatter Buster Station: 3/11

==Actions==

Lothyra alchemizes Gallium Arsenide && Computer, then hops through the portal, arriving at the top of the Tower and observing the situation.

What the hell are you doing?! The Godmodder's distracted fighting Notch, this is the perfect opportunity to strike!
Aww come on, do we really have to get up again. I'm so tired...
Well, get over it! Do you people realize what this is! This is the culmination of all our efforts! We have to hit the Godmodder with everything we've got! No holding back! No inhibitions!
I know that defeating the Godmodder is our goal, but perhaps you're being a bit too... obsessed?
Obsessed?! Are you kidding me?! This isn't obsession, this is DETERMINATION! This is revenge! Now get out there and kick the Godmodder's ass!

The Futurama Gang wearily stands up.

I'M BACK BABY!
I don't really like where this is going...
Need a reverse healing, Mr. Richard? Why not Zoidberg!?
The Godmodder will pay for his meanness!
That was quite an awkward and poorly-written line!
Hey!
Nice to meet you Godmodder, I'm Fry.
Finally. I thought you guys were going to be useless piles of crap. Anyway, I've also got some backup heading our way... HAYO built this thing months ago, and I've been itching for a chance to use it.

From the Sidelines: 50/50 Expended!

On the Orbital Nexus, a reentry pod is loaded into a bay and jettisoned. Firing its retro rockets, it deorbits and begins to enter Minecraftia's atmosphere, over the Tower...

Alright everyone, standby for Titanfall.

Everyone sees a twinkle in the sky grow intro an orange streak that heads directly for the Tower. Finally, once it reaches the lower atmosphere, it emits a sonic boom as it falls below the speed of sound and slams into the Tower's top floor. The cargo pod jettisons its structure to reveal its payload... a quadrupedal robot the size of a tank, armed with two primary antimatter miniguns.

B00t1ng up ma1n c0mput3r. Act1vat1ng P3r1ph3ry d1str0. Assum1ng d1r3ct c0ntr0l.

Suddenly, the mech springs to life, its reactors emitting an ominous hum...

Act1vat1ng ant1mak. Act1vat1ng s3ns0r arrays. 1n1t1al1z1ng w3ap0n syst3ms. Act1vat1ng m0t0rs. D1s-T1tan 0nl1ne.

The Dis-Titan's heads to the duel between Richard and Notch. Right when the Godmodder is about to land a blow...

1'm s0rry R1chard. 1'm afra1d 1 can't l3t y0u d0 that.

https://soundcloud.com/megaflamehedge/anger...verted-fate-ost

Suddenly, a barrage of antimatter projectiles is rapidly shot out of the Dis-Titan. At the same time, the Futurama Gang springs into action, entering the Planet Express Ship 2.0, with Leela piloting, Fry manning the newly-installed turret, and the rest taking potshots from the open cargo bay. The Planet Express Ship itself brings its antimatter missiles, primary lasers, and main turret to bear on the Godmodder, augmenting the Dis-Titan's barrage. Meanwhile, Lothyra examines her inventory...

Screw it, I know it's dangerous, but I promised myself that I wouldn't let myself be held back.

She addresses the rest of the Descendants.

Here's a question:
Why do you think I created exactly ten Engineering-themed Decads?
1 r3c0mm3nd that y0u br3ak 0ff fr0m y0ur plann3d act10n. Th3 0dds 0f 1t backf1r1ng ar3-
Never tell me the odds, Dis.

She then picks one d10 from the Endeavor's Decad, Reaper's Decad, Biotechnical Decad, Toxic Decad, Construction's Decad, Electrified Decad, Material Decad, Hiroshima's Decad, Miniaturized Decad, and Computerized Decad. 10d10s. She then rolls all of them at the Godmodder, when they land, they create the... MY GOD... they create the... ENGINEERING SPADER!

SUCK IT RICHARD! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=24413

May 17, 2015

+2 to Crystal

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 3/9

Wilson Money: $2

Fastest Thing Alive: 14/50 (+1 from Crystal)

Gotta Go Fast: 14/50 (+1 from Crystal)

Tesseract Manifold: 9/11

Antimatter Buster Station: 5/11

Gallium Arsenide Computer: 3/4

==Actions==

The Futurama Gang continues their barrage while Lothyra notices the Dis-Titan malfunctioning.

https://soundcloud.com/mildred-f/inverted-f...verted-fate-ost

Warn1ng: Pr1mary w3ap0nry hav3 suff3r3d cr1t1cal damag3. R1sk 0f fa1lur3 and/0r c0llat3ral damag3 s1gn1f1cant.
What?! NO! I just deployed you this turn! Keep firing!
1t 1s unw1s3 t0 c0n1-
I DON'T CARE! THIS IS IT! THIS IS THE END! FIRE EVERYTHING! DAMN THE CONSEQUENCES! EVERYTHING IS FINE!

The Dis-Titan struggles to ready another barrage... its shots careen wildly off-course, hitting the walls or being deflected by the Godmodder towards space. Everyone suddenly has a feeling of dread...

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=24442

May 19, 2015

The G.A Computer is done, BTW.

+2 to Crystal

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 4/9

Wilson Money: $2

Fastest Thing Alive: 16/50 (+1 from Crystal)

Gotta Go Fast: 15/50

Tesseract Manifold: 10/11

Antimatter Buster Station: 6/11

==Actions==
=> Engage overly long attack

Lothyra alchemizes Quantum Processor && Closed-cycle Dilution Refrigerator, then grimaces as the Dis-Titan is about to explode...

QUANTUM PROCESSOR: A processor that uses quantum principles like superposition and entanglement to examine multiple answers to a question at the same time, allowing it to quickly solve certain NP computational problems (problems that would take an exponential amount of time for ordinary computers). However, it is only useful when hooked up to a standard digital computer, because of reasons that I can't explain unless Twin would like to have a lecture on algorithmic theory. It also requires an operating environment 150x colder than interstellar space.

CLOSED-CYLE DILUTION REFRIGERATOR: A device that can cool whatever is placed in it from room temperature to 150x colder than interstellar space. How convenient.

Blaze of Glory: 50/50 Expended!

A lieutenant on the Orbital Nexus observes Amperz4nd's conflagration below. The station was already struggling to dodge any dangerous stray projectiles and attacks coming from below in an attempt to damage the Godmodder, but this... it's a miracle the station emerged unscathed. Well, until then. Suddenly, a stray antimatter bullet that was fired from the Titan-Dis collides the prograde side of the station's outer ring and passes through, grazing the station's central axis in the process, blasting an entire section of the ring out into space. The impact, combined with the force exerted by numerous secondary explosions and all the air rushing out of the compromised sections, imparts a spin on the station and knocks it out of its orbit. Adrian is suddenly hurled to the floor as the station quakes...

At the same time, Lothyra is suddenly hit with many simultaneous alerts, each being blasted directly into her brain through her neural implant.

DANGER! DANGER! NUMEROUS BREACHES ON ORBITAL NEXUS DETECTED!
OUTER RING SEVERELY COMPROMISED!
LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEMS FAILING!
POWER GENERATORS FAILING!
STATION DANGEROUSLY CLOSE TO MINECRAFTIA'S ATMOSPHERE

Suddenly, the messages cut out.
What?! Dis, what's going on up there?!
...
Dis, do you read me?!
Does anyone read me?!

She receives no response. Meanwhile, Adrian gets to his feet while alarms start blaring throughout the station.

"Argh! What the hell? Dis, status report!"
atgagtw4t-98ineedscissors61-
ERROR. 65% OF PROCESSING NODES DISABLED. HIGHER PROCESSING FUNCTIONS OFFLINE. QUANTUM-OPTICAL DISTRIBUTED INTELLIGENCE SYSTEM NOW IN SAFE MODE.

The AI suddenly cuts out. Adrian drags himself to a nearby terminal, activates the emergency power setting, and boots it up.

>report station
OUTER RING INTEGRITY CRITICAL. ANTIMATTER CONTAINMENT INTEGRITY COMPROMISED. LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEMS CRITICAL. STATION IS IN UNSTABLE ORBIT.
>report orbit
WITHOUT A COURSE CORRECTION, STATION WILL ENTER INTO MINECRAFTIA'S ATMOSPHERE AND DEORBIT IN TWO MINUTES. COLLISION WILL OCCUR IN SIX MINUTES.
>initiate course correction
COURSE CORRECTION IMPOSSIBLE. ORBITAL MAINTENANCE THRUSTERS HAVE BEEN DISABLED. STATION DESTRUCTION IMMINENT.

After reading that last lime, Adrian slams his fist into the wall before recomposing himself. After leaving the room he is in, he dons a spacesuit from an emergency locker before entering the Main Hall. Its entire outer wall has been blown away, exposing it to the vacuum of space. He grimaces as he sees the bodies of numerous unsuited personal floating outside the station, having been blown away before they even had a chance to don a suit. He spots other personal in spacesuits gathering in the main hall, and opens communications with them.

"Everyone! Get to the hangar! There should still be spaceplanes that we can use! Hurry, the station will begin entering the atmosphere in two minutes!"

All the personnel head into the elevator connecting the outer ring with the central core of the station, and manually travel there using their suits' RCS thrusters. While the rest immediately head to the hangars and begin preparing the spaceplanes for departure, Adrian makes a detour into a server room called the Black Box. There, he finds a small cube labelled "QuODIS personality backup," detaches it from its housing, and returns to the hangars. After ensuring that everyone else has boarded a spaceplane, he boards one himself, and all the spaceplanes in the hangar depart from it using their RCS thrusters. Already the flames of atmospheric entry have begun to touch the station as Adrian activates a distress signal.

"To all players and NPC on Minecraftia! This is Lieutenant Adrian Greene of the HAYO Battalion! Our main space station, the Orbital Nexus is currently on a collision course with Minecraftia, with an impact point 10 kilometers south of the Origin Point! We have approximately 100 kilograms of antimatter on board, which will create a tremendous explosion! We advise all individuals near the vicinity of the origin point to evacuate immediately!"

Adrian contacts some other personnel.

"What's the estimated casualties?"
"20 million NPCs. The station will detonate above a populated area."
"[REDACTED]... Wait, the collision point is close to the Godmodder's Tower. What if we redirect the station to crash into there?"

Adrian activates the weapon systems on his spaceplane and examines the Orbital Nexus, searching for a target that can correct its course... Finally, he spots an exposed secondary antimatter container. Right as it reaches a certain position due to the station's rotation, he fires at it with twin laser beams, detonating it, the explosion giving the station a jolt.

"That should be it... the only thing we can do now is get the hell out of here."

The spaceplanes quickly flee the vicinity as the Orbital Nexus descends into Minecraftia, being visible from the entire face it is above as a bright streak careening through the sky. Finally, after four more agonizing minutes, it reaches the top of the Tower and collides directly with the Godmodder. The moment the central frame buckles, the station's antimatter stores detonate, releasing an equivalent of 4.3 gigatons of TNT in energy. In an instant, all non-Player/entity life within 30 kilometers is instantly vaporized, including the crowd of ordinary players. Then a massive fireball rises above the Tower, burning everything within 150 kilometers. A titanic shockwave flattens mountains up to 200 kilometers away. Within seconds a massive cloud of smoke rises over the affected area, the same smoke that blotted out the sun and killed the dinosaurs 65 million years ago in two different parts of the Trifecta. The entire ground around the Tower has been reduced to lava. However, the Tower itself (and the Roots of Yggdrasil), has miraculously survived. The players and entities are completely stunned.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=24448

May 19, 2015

+2 to Crystal

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 4/9

Wilson Money: $2

Fastest Thing Alive: 17/50

Gotta Go Fast: 16/50

Tesseract Manifold: 11/11 Complete!

Antimatter Buster Station: 7/11

Quantum Processor & Closed-cycle Dilution Refrigerator: 2/?

==Actions==

While everyone else is reeling from the attack, Lothyra just stares as she tries to process the events of the previous post. Suddenly, some spaceplanes land near the roof of the tower, and one of them makes contact with her.

"Lothyra?"
"Lothyra, are you there?"
I can't believe it... they were right...
How many made it?
"Only fifty, I think."
NO! No...
I can't...
They were right, the Council was right all this time...
No, I can't break down now, I have to finish the... finish the mission...
Use up the remaining antimatter... Break the dependency.

Lothyra breaks down iAntimak Carbine, iBoomstick, and her Antimatter Nuke Stations, harvesting 10 Tiny Antimatter Canisters from them. They are now useless. She then begins to alchemize Nanogel Rifle && Plasma Heater && Nanobattery Pack && Air Canister && Magstone Wires && Computer before just sitting down for a few minutes.

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=24462

May 19, 2015

+2 to Crystal

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 4/9

Wilson Money: $2

((Yeah charges'll be useless anyway. Sorry Crystal.))

Antimatter Buster Station: 8/11

Quantum Processor & Closed-cycle Dilution Refrigerator: 3/?

Nanogel Rifle & Plasma Heater & Nanobattery Pack & Air Canister & Magstone Wires & Computer: 2/?

==Actions==

Lothyra notices the bag that Amperz4nd handed to her... She sullenly examines it.

Perhaps with this... there's some hope for rebuilding... At least the elf babies made it out okay...

Original Post: https://www.minecraftforum.net/forums/off-t...r?comment=24504

May 20, 2015

+2 to Crystal

Universal Power Ubercharge Meter: 4/9

Wilson Money: $2

Eh screw it.

Fastest Thing Alive: 20/20 (+2 from Crystal) Complete! Saving for next post.

Gotta Go Fast: 18/20 (+1 from Crystal)

Antimatter Buster Station: 9/11

Quantum Icebox: 4/4 Complete!

The Magnetic Anomaly: 3/9

==Actions==
Lothyra sullenly alchemizes G.A. Computer && Quantum Icebox, while all the Futurama Gang members attack Error as well with their respective weapons (Fry is manning the Planet Express Ship Turret, and Leela is flying the Planet Express Ship 2.0).